words in movies
Phoebe: Oo! You should have one of us do it!
Rachel: Hey! We were not on aOkay. Thats fine! Fine. Yknow what Ben? One day when you are a lot older I am going to tell you that entire story over a pitcher of real margaritas, okay?
Rachel: Oh, youre one of those. But yknow what? I have two sisters of my own and we just-just tortured each other.
Ben: (laughs) Thats a good one.
Rachel: Yeah? You like that one?
Rachel: Im funny? Oh thank God! Well hey, Ive got a ton of these! Umm, oh hearDo you want a good one? Heres a good one. Umm, you uh, you take a quarter, take a quarter and, and you blacken the edge. Right? (Does so.) And then you say to person, I bet you cant roll this quarter from your forehead to your chin without it leaving your face. And then when they do it, theyre left with a big black pencil line right down the center of their face.
Phoebe: Oh, interesting you should call me that! Now that I may never have one! (Holds up the warning label.)
Chandler: See Joe, not that thats not grrreat! But, one of the cool things about having somebody we know perform the ceremony is that it can be about us! Yknow, it can be more personal. You can tell stories about us!
[Cut to London, Chandlers hotel room. He is getting ready for bed by doing push-ups. One push-up. Just as he gets under the covers, theres a knock on the door.]
Monica: One!
Chandler: Uh, could you leave me one?
Joey: All right, here you go buddy. (He tosses him one.) Go nuts. (Exits.)
Joey: Oh (To Chandler) Can you imagine if I hadnt left you that last one? You two mightve never gotten together. Ooh-ooh! Could you imagine if I sent that hooker up to the room like I was gonna?! Its like it was in the stars!
Joey: Yeah for like a half an hour one night! Chandler, she wants you for the rest of her life! Youre so lucky! Look what I missed out on by not being there! Although you know what? It could never have worked like you guys did, cause you guys are perfect for each other. Yknow, we look at you and-and we see you together and it just it-it fits. Yknow? And you just know its gonna last forever.
[Scene: The Gellers' kitchen. Monica, Mrs. Geller and one of Mrs. Geller's friends are preparing the cake.]
Monica: One!
Chandler: Okay, one thing at a time. (They run out to get married.)
[Scene: Rachels Room, Joey moves Rosss coat to get the tissues Rachel wants and the engagement ring box Mrs. Geller gave him falls out of the pocket it was inside. Joey goes to one knee, picks up the box, opens it, and sees that its an engagement ring.]
Ross: I know, I know! When I was here for Holidays on Ice (Joey looks around worried hoping no one heard that) I was sitting so far away Michelle Kwan couldn't read my banner!
Phoebe: Could you-could you umm, give us one second?
[Another set of flashbacks begin with Episode 521: The One With The Ball, Joey and Ross are throwing a ball around.]
Kate: Yes. Are you one of the retarded cousins?
Rachel: What Phoebe? Wait! One time he caught me smoking he said if he ever saw me doing that again hed make me eat the entire pack.
[The next flashback is from The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line. He's telling Joey that he kissed Cathy.]
913 - The One Where Monica Sings
Rachel: Okay, but if it only happened that one time, how come we found your underwear in our apartment the other day?
Chandler: You called everyone and said you were having trouble finding a Santa costume, so I borrowed one from a guy at work!
Gavin: One of the best, ma'am, one of the best...
Joey: Oh yeah, yeah! He's done tons of commercials. I've seen him in like Sugar Smacks, Playstation, and that one for the phone company. In fact he was so good in that one, he actually convinced me to switch phone companies. Chandler was mad .
(He tries to move in front of the class, only goes out of control and rolls into the hall, catching himself on the doorway with his pointer. He then pulls himself back into the room with the pointer, only he jams one end of it between the door frame and the door and breaks the pointer in half.)
Phoebe: You know, you are talking about one of my dear, dear friends.
JOEY: Hey, I'll be alright. I mean it's not like I'm starting from sqare one. I was Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives. Heh? I mean that's gotta have some kind of cache.
Monica: Two guys in one night? Wow, I thought she became a slut after she got her nose fixed.
Ross: Oh, come on Rach, we will. I promise. We have more interviews (They sit down and Rachel sighs) And worse comes to worse, we can always reconsider the uhm... the first one we met with.
Joey: Come on, please, it'll be just this one more, well actually it's two.
Dr. Long: taking a long walk, and then theres the one thats proved most effective: sex.
Janice: Oh my God. You listen to me, Chandler, you listen to me. One of these times is just gonna be your last chance with me. (She runs off)
Phoebe: You know, now you're more like, you know like, "Mr. Caring Boss," "Mr.", you know, "I'm one of you, Boss," "Mr., I wanna be your buddy, Boss Man Bing!"
Rachel: Yeah, I think she wants the old one back.
Phoebe: Oo, this is a big one. Eww! Arghhhh!!
Janice: I hate to be the one to say it, but honey you two (Her and Emma) are on your own.
Chandler: Please, one ridiculous problem at a time!
Ross: Like uh yknow like this! This! (He picks up one of those art projects that kids make in kindergarten and first grade.) She-she couldve made this!
Phoebe: One, two, three!
Chandler: (looks around) I'll take this one too (to Ross) Uh ... Mommy?
Joey: Dude, I'm sorry. But hey, there's one spot left, right?
[Scene: The hallway between the bedrooms. Ross is coming upstairs and stops between two doors. He looks at the one on the right, then he looks at the one on his left, thinks about it, and goes in the one on his right.]
Rachel: Oh-oh-oh, which one is Bonnie again?
Ross: Oh, we have one too!!
Bobby: Yeah, he took the other one off and hit me with it.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is in the kitchen, Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe are sitting around the table writing one notepads while Chandler is looking over their shoulders.]
Phoebe: Well its justits one of those situations that I just hate. Yknow? A massage client gave me three tickets to the Helmet-Pelts exhibit at the Morgan Chase museum.
Joey/Drake: Oh, what about this one.
Chandler: Honey, isnt it possible that the company that sold the jeans made more than just the one pair?
Ross: No. It's the one he's licking.
Joey: Well, I'm feeling really insecure about the one we are shooting tomorrow...
Rachel: No, one of them...
Monica: Which one?
Ross: Oh, ha, I wrote that in one minute.
Ross: (sexily) Yes there will. (Mona leaves and Ross tries to find the same table.) Oh guess what, Molly Gilbert youve just been bumped up to table one. And if its all right with you Im gonna take your place at table sixMartin Clickclocken.
Joey: (speaking aloud) Please, I was trying to be nice, you're the worst one!
Phoebe: Well, nobody wants a ghost. But youve got one, because the house is sitting on an ancient Indian burial ground.
Chandler: It kills over one americans every year.
Chandler: No-no-no-no, no, its a good thing. Why must we dial so speedily anyway? Why must we rush through life? Why cant we savor the precious moments? (to one of Joeys sisters) Those are some huge breasts you have.
RACHEL: But I do not want to have everything decided for me. I spent my whole life like that. It's what I had with Barry, that was one of the reasons I left. I, I like not knowing right now and I'm sorry if that scares you but if you want to be with me you are gonna have to deal with that.
[The next clip is the second famous fight in The One Where Ross and Rachel Take A Break.]
Phoebe: I-I'm sorry it wasn't one of those movies with, like, y'know, guns and bombs and, like, buses going really fast...
Monica: Gotcha sailor. (Kicks one of her shoes off and it lands in the kitchen knocking something down, but she continues to strip.)
Joey: Which one, they all suck!
Ross: Thats true, thanks dad. (To All) People should be dancing! Huh? Hey, this is a party! Come on! Joey, dance!! (He starts to dance but stops when no one else joins him.)
Phoebe: Yeah and I-I found you one too who is not a weirdo.
[The next clip is from The One With The Jellyfish.]
Man: (being joined by the rest of the barbershop quartet) One, two, three...
[Scene: The Fertility Clinic; Chandler walks out one of the rooms]
BIG BULLY: Don't do that to yourself. Any one of us could have tripped over that little girls jump-rope.
EDDIE: Not Sean Penn. Alright, I, I've got a funny one, alright. My last girlfriend Tilly. Ok, we're eating breakfast, right, and I made all these pancakes, there was like 50 pancakes right. And all of the sudden she turns to me, alright, and she says, 'Eddie.' I say, 'yeah,' she says, 'Eddie, I don't want to see you anymore.' And it was literally like she had reached into my chest, ripped out my heart, and smeared it all over my life, ya know. And now there's like this incredible abyss, ya know, and I'm falling and I keep falling and I don't think I'm ever gonna stop. [finishes laughing] That uh, wasn't such a funny story, was it?
Joey: I'm telling you, that monkey is a chick magnet! She's going to take one look at his furry, cute little face and it'll seal the deal.
Chandler: (yelling from the changing room) All right! I found one that fits!
Ross: Yeah-yeah, except Apollo 8 didnt actually land on the moon. But you-you-you could write that umm, your love lets me orbit the moon twice and return safely. (Apollo 8 was the first one that orbited the moon and the one that read the Christmas Story from the orbit of the moon on Christmas Eve, 1968. They also took the famous Earthrise picture of the Earth rising over the moon.)
Joey: Hey, here you go. (Hands her another one.)
(Phoebe and Rachel go off to the dressing rooms. They enter one and close the curtain.)
Joey: Well uh, I went down there and told him that no one treats my friends like that and that hed better come up here and apologize. Ill see you later. (Starts to leave)
Monica: We do not have one of those signs.
Joey: (Smiling) I can't believe you guys went for that one!
Mike: Yeah look, about tomorrow, I... I've got a question for ya. I just found out that one of my groomsmen had had an emergency and can't make it.
Ross: There was one! She's it! All the rest look like they should live under a bridge!
Jill: All right, Im leaving! Because Im not going to spend one more day with someone whose out to sabotage my every move. Thats you Rachel!
Dr. Green: (interrupting him) I know!! Its a museum! What, youre the only one around here who can make a joke! At least mine was funny. Ah, waiter, we will have two lobsters and a menu. (nods at Ross, and mouths I dont know to the waiter.)
Monica: Wait-wait!! Okay, stop it! Stop it! Stop! (Breaks it up.) Now listen, no ones gonna fight in this apartment.
Monica: (nearly shouting) One thousand...
Chandler: (to the one sitting next to him) Really?
Joey: No, no, Emma has one Hugsy, the new Hugsy, huh? The other Hugsy, I don't know, I guess I'll just take it back.
Charlie: Well, for one, he was talking about paintings that were nowhere around.
Ross: Well, the old lady died. And how do I know? Her dying wish was for one last kiss. But I dont care, (To Rachel) because you got the apartment. Yes!
Monica: No, Chandlers still in Phase One, and Joeys that thing you smell.
Joey: (stands up) I just have one question!
Chandler: (trying to cover up why his hand is over his heart) One nation, under God. Indivisible with liberty and justice for all. (Laughs.) I remembered it. (Its a butchered version of the Pledge of Allegiance of the United States for our foreign friends.) The champagne is here. (The waiter is delivering it and pouring two glasses.)
Ross: No, I'll do it. (he quickly grabs Joey's boarding pass and gives Joey his one.)
Monica: Which one is which again?
Rachel: That was one time, Ross, and they were only like 5 milligrams.
Joey: Oh, thats, thats ah, one of the old ones, hes just taking it to the back.
Ross: (Thinking it over) Sure! (Takes one) Hey, I just found out, I get Ben for the holidays this year.
Monica: Oh, I still cant believe my dad saw us having sex! He didnt make it to one of piano recitals, but this he sees!
Earl: Well I only have one thing to do today. (He looks at his board in his office that reads, "Todays Tasks: KILL SELF.") I guess I could push it back.
[The next flashback is from The One With Ross's Sandwich, Ross his confronting his boss about him eating Ross's sandwich.]
Phoebe: What?! You can't separate them! That's terrible. Which one?
Gary: Yeah, we took a little stroll in the park and no one was around, so
Phoebe: Okay, well, this is crazy. Can't seriously be talking about me taking one of your kids, can we?
Chandler: She went on one of those spray-on tan places.
Chandler: (notices something) Ross is wearing leather pants! Does nobody else see that Ross is wearing leather pants? (Pause, no one speaks.) Someone comment on the pants!
Chandler: The meaning of the box is three fold. One (holds a finger up through the air hole), it gives me the time to think about what I did. Two (holds up another finger), it proves how much I care about my friendship with Joey. And three (holds up a third finger), it hurts!
Rachel: (To Joey) Yeah I knowIm goodI got it! (Joey slowly backs away.) (To the boy) Now wait a minute, Ive got one more thing I have to say to you oh right! Shut up!
Monica: One Two Three...
Rachel: All right, all right, you're right, I won't do anything with Joey, I just thought that we (Joey enters the hall) Ok so that would be two cups of tarragon, one pound of baking soda and one red onion? (Joey enters his apartment)