words in movies
[Scene: An Emergency Room, Rachel and Monica enter. Rachel is limping and leaning on Monica for support.]
(Monica starts on the form, while Rachel catches her breath and massages her ankle.)
Ross: No, no, with him. (He mimes holding the baby like a football.) I'm on this field, and they, they hike me the baby... and I, I know I've gotta do something 'cause the Tampa Bay defence is comin' right at me.
Chandler: Man, if you tried something like that on my birthday, you'd be starin' at the business end of a hissy fit.
Monica: Come on, she'll be here any minute.
(The whole party gathers round as Ross puts the box on the coffee table.)
Phoebe: Hey, what's going on?
Monica: Hi, come on in.
Monica: (as Rachel) Yeah... Yeah, I know it's pretty selfish, but haha, hey, that's me. (Indicating a dish on the table) Why don't you try the hummus?
Dr. Mitchell: (on the phone) Monica and Rachel's apartment. Err yeh, aayah, yeh, just one second... (handing it to Monica) ..ah, Rachel, it's your dad.
Monica: (as Rachel) Remember back in freshman year? (Talking fast before Rachel can catch her) Well, Billy Dreskin and I had sex on your bed.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Ross, Phoebe, Chandler and Monica sit round the coffee table, playing Scrabble. Rachel, still in her dressing gown, is pleading on the phone, her free hand shaking with agitation.]
Rachel: (on phone) Daddy... Daddy... Daddy, why whyyy would I sleep with Billy Dreskin? His father tried to put you out of business! (Rachel turns to Monica, clasping the receiver to her bosom so Dr.Green can't hear, while mouthing "You are...") ...dead!
Rachel: Hello? (Listens) Um, yeah, uh, (snapping her fingers at Ross who takes the remote from Marcel, then turns off the TV) Okay ah, hold on a second, lemme lemme just check and see if see if she's here.
[Scene: Riff's, Phoebe is entering. Ursula returns with two plates of chicken, but she only has time to set one on the table, when...]
[Scene: The Emergency Room. The officious admissions nurse is again on duty. Rachel and Monica enter, looking worried. As they approach the desk, Rachel adopts a winning smile, while Monica struggles to smile at all.]
Monica: (as Rachel) Um, okay. You just called a little while ago about needing a signature on the admissions form. Well, it turns out we need a whole new one (little laugh) because uh, you see, I-I, I put the wrong name again. (Little laugh) 'cause um...
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is neglecting the game of Scrabble, for he's busily drawing on his own childhood in an attempt to help Ross. Marcel chitters about.]
Monica: What's goin' on?
Phoebe: (as Ursula) That's right, I don't... But I was, I was drunk on you!
Phoebe: (as Ursula) You know... (unconsciously putting a hand on his knee) You're gonna be really, really hard to get over.
[Scene: The Hospital, Marcel lies on the operating table while recovering from the anaesthetic, tucked up under a sheet like an infant in a huge bed. Ross sits beside him, as a smiling Chandler, Monica and Rachel look on.]
Chandler: (Tapping Ross on his shoulder) So, you feel like a dad yet?
Chandler: Hey, come on, you came through, you did what you had to do. That is very dad.
Rachel: I just dont want him to meet anybody until I am over my crushAnd I will get over it. Its-its not like I love him, its just physical! ButI mean I get crushes like this all the time! I mean hell, I had a crush on you when I first met ya!
Joey: Ahhh, I fold like a cheap hooker who got hit in the stomach by a fat guy with sores on his face. (the girls look at him, confused) Oh, I'm out.
Laura: Oh, it's nothing. I went on a date with a guy who lived in this building and it didn't end very well.
JOEY: Well, you know that guy that's on my show that's in a coma? He's havin' a brunch.
Rachel: Monica, you dont even have a bed, you sleep in a ball on the floor!
Monica: Go on, teach me something about men and women.
Monica: How she drove you crazy, picking on every little detail, like your hair... for example.
Chandler: Okay, heres the situation. The keys to the cuffs are on the back of the door. Could you be a doll and grab them and scoot on over and unlock me? And on a totally different subject, that is a lovely pantsuit.
Joey: Thats what that was?! Cause that other thing? I thought you were on to something, but it did nothing for me.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Phoebe are on the couch as Ross enters.]
The Security Guard: Come on, lady! (Starts to escort her out.)
JOEY: Hey, I'll be alright. I mean it's not like I'm starting from sqare one. I was Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives. Heh? I mean that's gotta have some kind of cache.
[Jack and Judy come out of Monicas room and sit down on the couch.]
ROSS: [doorbell buzzes] That's, that's Julie. Ju... Julie, Julie. [talks on intercom] Hi Julie.
Joey: Maybe, maybe we did a good thing, helping Ross get back on his feet!
(Theres a knock on the door and a nurse enters carrying Emma.)
ROSS: (putting his arm up with his hand on the door frame.)� Why?� (He starts to lower his arm.)
RACH: Oh yeah, c'mon, I'm movin' on. He can press her up against that window as much as he wants. For all I care, he can throw her through the damn thing.
Monica: So that was the baby's room. (They come out and Chandler throws Joey behind the couch and puts his foot on him. Monica looks at Chandler)
RACH: Ross, Chandler wrote something about me on his computer and he won't let me see.
Ross: Hey, whatd you guys do to get up on there?
Ross: Of course it is. Yeah, come on in. Ooh-ooh, go by the window you can pretend to be surfing. (He pretends he's surfing by the window.)
Joey: (on phone) Yeah, hi. You guys got any of those baby chicks? Cause I was watching this ah, commercial on TV and man, those guys are cute!
Danny: Yep. (To Rachel) I'm gonna wear these on our date tonight.
Rachel: Im fine! Im fine! Im just losing a tooth, its no big deal. I have a dentist! Yknow. Im gonna go put some ice on it. Excuse me. (She goes over to the ice and Joey and Monica follow her.) What do I do now? What do I do now?
Joey: Sure, yeah. Will you just keep an eye on the chick and the duck?
Chandler: Glass, sand, whatever. (Walks out as Monica and Phoebe turn to check on the babies again.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey is debriefing Rachel on her rejection earlier that day and telling her what she shouldve done. Ross and Phoebe are watching.]
Joey: Come on, Lydia, you can do it. Push! Push 'em out, push 'em out, harder, harder. Push 'em out, push 'em out, way out! Let's get that ball and really move, hey, hey, ho, ho. Let's (notices the nurse looking at him strangely) I was justyeah, right. Push! Push!
Monica: (lying down on a mattress) Oh! Ohhhhh! Oh! Phoebe, come here. Aw, this is my new bed. You gotta feel this bad boy.
Joey: Yeah, but for a one-year-old. What's the point... the other day she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow and the cow says "El-moo"! (Joey starts laughing) Yeah... that's a funny cup!
Phoebe: Um, well, Max told me about Minsk, so (Puts on a fake cheery voice) congratulations! This is so exciting!
[Monica puts the pea on top of the spoonful and takes a bite.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is letting everyone in on the new developments.]
(Ross steps onto the bottom rung of the ladder and then steps on Joeys chest.)
JOEY: Ah, it's career stuff. I don't know if you heard but they killed off my character on the show.
Ross: What?! No! No! Wait! Youre right, this is stupid. Who cares what people think? I mean, I mean we like each other right? Theres nothing wrong with that. Come on. (They get up and go over to the table where his colleagues are sitting.) Burt? Lydia? Mel? This is Elizabeth.
Monica: No! (Pause) Are you doing it?! I dont hear anything! Come on!
Chandler: Okay and he hasnt proposed yet because she has no ring on her finger.
[We see a shot of Jack drinking condensed milk on the couch.]
[Cut to Ross and Monica, who are finally on a platform!]
Tim: Wow! Umm, okay. Umm (To Phoebe) I-I-I realize I came on a little strong but, its only because I think youre so amazing. (To Monica) And uh, I-I just wanna, I just wanna tell you how much I appreciate you giving me an opportunity here because Iyoure the most talented chef Ive ever worked for. Anyway (Starts to leave and Phoebe and Monica trade looks.)
Rachel: Thats funny. (Phoebe puts her feet up on Rosss table.)
Joey: (gets up) All right. Don't look at my list, Ross, 'cause there's a lot on there that you don't have.
Rachel: Come on! They rushed into this thing so fast its ridiculous! I mean, theyre gonna be engaged for like what? A year? And somewhere along the way, one of them is gonna realise what theyve done and theyre call the whole thing off. Im telling ya, youre gonna be dancing at my wedding before youre dancing at theres.
Rachel: Phoebe, come on can we finish this later? Cause I wanna go running before it gets dark. Oh! Why don't you come with me?!
(Joey pats him on the stomach and heads to bed.)
Phoebe: (singing) "Went to the store, sat on Santa's lap. Asked him to bring my friends all kind of crap. Said all you need is to write them a song. They haven't heard it, so don't try and sing along. No, don't sing along.
[Scene: Carol's Hospital Room, Carol is on the bed, Ross and Susan are at her side.]
[Scene: Kates Apartment, Joey and Kate are returning from a night out on the town.]
Chandler: What the hell is going on?!
Monica: That didnt work on mom, its not going to work on us.
The Interviewer: But therell be perhaps 30 people under you so you can dump a certain amount on them.
Charlie: Ooh... Is it because of what might be on the bedspread, because I saw that news report too, with the infra red and the ... I could just...
Ross: (to the guard) Dont sweat it, Ive got this section covered. Yeah, in fact Ive got this little baby (Turns on a mini-flashlight) to shine in peoples eye(The guard walks away)Okay, see you later.
(Joey looks at Ross with a horrified look on his face.)
Ross: (to Joey, who is wearing a blue, 3 foot hand) FOR THE LOVE OF GOD TAKE IT OFF!! (takes it off his hand and throws it on the floor)
Ross: Come on! The time we were all waiting in line for Dances With Wolves and that one guy cut in line in front of us and I just lost it?! Screamed at him! Turned all red! Red Ross!!
Chandler: Ohh that's the worse thing that can happen on an anniversary ever!
Chandler: Alright look, if it means that much to you, a may be able to get on more with the big boobs. But the giant ass and the big clown feet?
(Joey makes a sound like a game show wheel spinning with the pointer bouncing off of the bars on the wheel as it slows and comes to a stop.)
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachels, Phoebe is sitting on the couch as Rachel and Monica enter.]
Monica: All right, biggest suite in the place. Come on! (Rolls the dice.)
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's, Chandler is sitting on one of the chairs and the duck is running around him and quacking.]
Max: Tell her, David. 'I don't wanna go to Minsk and work with Lifson and Yamaguchi and Flench, on nonononononono. I wanna stay here and make out with my girlfriend!!' (Storms out)
Monica: Wait Chandler come on, letsits not a big deal!
[Scene: Ross's apartment, he's on the phone with Emily.]
Chandler: Come on, let me see that smile.
Rachel: Oh, go on! You telling people about me?
Janice: Okay, Chandler, come on!
JOEY: Come on, I need your help here.
Joey: Uhh Pheebs, I heard that. Can you put him on?
Rachel: Come on. (they start to leave) Oh! And, uh, by the way....
Ross: (popping up behind Joey wearing an Indian headdress) Come on, it's fun!
Rachel: Yeah but, my assistant Tag does sit-ups in the office during lunch. Ohh! I could just spread him on a cracker.
[Scene, Phoebe and Rachels, theyre sitting together on the couch.]
Ross: Hey uh, well, todays my first lecture and I kinda wanted to try it out on you guys, do you, do you mind?
JOEY: [pulls out a VCR tape] Hey Monica, what's on this video tape?
Monica: That's it, just sign right on the bra (the actor does so).
Leslie: Aw come on Phoebe would you just think about it?
PHOEBE: Ok, I didn't see it, because I was putting on my jacket, but I uh want to believe you.
Ben: That you and daddy were not on a break.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is working as Phoebe and Ross are sitting on the couch.]
Joey: I dont know. Just uh, just tell em it was a mix-up with the invitations, orNo-no-no! Blame it on the post office. They hate the post office. And the Irish! But I dont think you can blame it on them so (He dials the phone and hands it to Monica.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Chandler are entering, Joey is on the phone.]
Rachel: (entering) Hey! Whats goin on?
"Went to the store, sat on Santa's lap. Asked him to bring my friends all kinds of crap. Said all you need is to write them a song. Now, you haven't heard it yet, so don't try to sing along. No, don't sing along.
Mr. Tribbiani: Just for a coupla days. I got a job midtown. I figure I'm better off staying with the kid than hauling my ass back and forth on the ferry. (Sees Roger) I don't know this one.
[Time lapse, they're still on the ride along and Joey is just sniffing his sandwich.]
Monica: For this weekend! Oh gosh, it would be perfect, we get to see Joey plus we get to start our anniversary celebration on the plane. We can call it out plane-aversary.
Joey: No, no! Don't try to turn this around on me, ok? I'm not some kind of... social work, ok, that you can just... do.
Chandler: Hey it's the most eligible man in NY. How's the moving on going?
(She throws her bag inside, and starts to climb through the window. She gets halfway in and the window slams shut on her butt.)
(Joey starts to the shower with a grim, determined look on his face.)
(Everyone looks at him. He realizes he just spilled the beans about Ross's crush on Rachel. You can hear this entire classic scene by clicking here.)
CHANDLER: Well, we haven't exactly met, we just stayed up all night talking on the internet.
Joey: Yes! Didnt you ever read Sports Illustrated?! No! I didnt read yours! But come on, we can go to the game tonight!
Ross: This is unbelievable. I - I have never been so insulted in my life. Now, if you'll wrap up my free crab cakes, I'll be on my way.
Ross: Hey Pheebs, could you please not put your feet up on my new (On Rachels glare) old sheet?
Chandler: Almost as good as that play with the two naked girls on the see-saw.