words in movies
Ross: Id bet Id still be doing my kara-tay. (Thats karate, hes just saying it that way.) Towards the end of our marriage I was doing a lot of kara-tay as a way of releasing the tension from yknow, not doing anything else physical.
{Transcribers note: This is where the opening credits are, but theyre not the usual opening credits. Oh no! These credits are based on the world that would have been created had all of the above actually happened. It starts out with all of them at the fountain sitting on the couch as Fat Monica runs up and sits on the arm of the couch, tilting the whole thing towards her. It then goes on to show Rachels still a shop-aholic and with Barry. Fat Monica is sweating while cooking and dancing while eating a donut. Phoebe as the Wall Street shark smoking while on two cell phones. Then theyre dancing in the fountain. Joey entering as Dr. Drake Remoray and meeting a groupie. Chandler trying to write as a bird does its business on his shoulder and falling asleep while typing. Ross doing some kara-tay and trying to get Carol into bed. And finally, some more dancing in the fountain, them all flexing, and the turning out the lamp and shutting off all the lights bit from the first season. Just remember one thing, this is an alternate universe. Everything from every other episode doesnt apply, for instance, Ross and Rachel have no history. And in fact have not seen each other in years in this world.}
Monica: Hes not boring! Hes just-hes just low key.
Monica's Boyfriend: Yeah. Yknow, the hazelnut actually not a nut, its a seed.
Joey: (not impressed) Wow!!
Chandler: Oh I just got another rejection letter. They said my writing was funny, just not "Archie Comic funny."
Rachel: Ohh, so do you! Did you lose weight? (Shes not quite sure of that one.)
Chandler: Well its kinda hard to be friends with Drake because of his busy schedule and the fact that hes not real.
Rachel: (still not quite able to look at him) Hi! I love you on that show! I watch you everyday! I mean, when you took out your own kidney to save your ex-wife even though she tired to kill you
Joey: (turning and whispering to Monica) Shes not crazy is she?
Ross: Come on Pheebs, its not that bad! Yknow most people would be excited if they didnt have to work for a couple of weeks.
Phoebe: Most people dont like their jobs, I love my job! I have not been working for three hours and Im already going crazy. I miss Joan.
Chandler: I always thought having a heart attack was natures way of telling you to die! (Phoebe glares at him.) But youre not gonna die. I mean, you are going to die, but youre not gonna die today. I wish I was dead.
Phoebe: Oh thats not so bad.
Rachel: (awestruck, then not) Isnt that a line from the show?!
Joey: (To Rachel) Did I not just tell him?
Chandler: Its not all juice! (Rachel quickly gets out of the way.)
Ross: Carol our sex life isits just not working
Monica: Its not mayonnaise!!
Rachel: Yeah. Oh I just wish we could not be married for a little bit! Yknow I just wish we could be like on a break!
Monica: Well, youre not.
Rachel: Oh, its so easy for you I mean, youre not married, you get to have sex with who ever you want!
Monica: Its not like, I havent any opportunities. I mean, yknow, Im just waiting for the perfect guy. Im seeing this guy Roger, all right? Hes not perfect, but umm, I think maybe I should just get it over with. Yknow, give him my flower.
Rachel: Yes!! I mean sex does not have to be a big deal! There shouldnt be all this rules and restrictions! Yknow, people should be able to sleep with who ever they want, whenever
Phoebe: No! Its not a cigarette! The smoke is coming out of me!
Dr. Drake Remoray: Not so fast Wesley! (Rachel does a silent clap.)
Dr. Drake Remoray: Thats right Wesley! I just stopped by to say that, youre not a real doctor! And that womans brain, is fine!
Dr. Drake Remoray: Youre not dying Hope, youre gonna live a long, healthy life. With me.
Chandler: Listen Phoebe, hes right. People are not supposed to have heart attacks at 31.
Susan: (not taking her eyes off Carol) Hello Ross. (Takes off her coat and hands it to him.) I love what youve done with this space.
Monica: Stop it!! Thats not funny!!
Chandler: With Roger? (Monica shyly looks away.) Not just with Roger?! (Monica shrugs.) Oh my God!
Monica: No. Hes not a horrible guy.
Chandler: No you are not! You are sweet and wonderful and this is gonna happen for you.
Joey: No! No! No, not after seeing that.
Joey: Thats ridiculous! Im not a "Star," just a regular famous actor.
Joey: Look, do you want the ring or not?!
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa! Youre not gonna use the pay phone to call work, are ya?
Joey: (not quite sure of how to answer that) Well uh, look Ross I uh, I think Carols great and Im sure youre a very attractive man, but I .
Joey: Not the other one?
Rachel: Well, if you see him, will you please tell him that Im looking for him and that this I am not gonna throw up!
Rachel: Me? Im great! Im fine! Im sooo good!! But, you know whos not great?! Men! Youre a man right Ross?!
Ross: Look I-I dont know whats going on with you and your husband and what is hopefully an adult dog walker, look can I just say not all men are like that.
Ross: She is not (Realizes) Shes gay. Oh my God. She is so gay! I cant believe this.
Chandler: Yeah! When you were talking about Roger, that was killing me! Look, things like last night they dont just happen. Yknow? Or at least not to me. Or with the other two women, in the morning yknow I was just lying there and I couldnt wait to just go hang out with my friends, but with you I always yknow with a friend.
Chandler: I know you probably dont want to go out with me, yknow because I make too many jokes and Ive never been in a serious relationship and I guess Im not technically a "doctor "
Ross: (interrupting him) YeahNo-but-but-but-but! Were just gonna go home and take a shower. Now, thats not scary right?
Chandler: Not so much!
Chandler: Im not Jewish, so
Joey: Ah-ah-ah Mr. Smartie Pants, its just not my character thats not brain dead. Hey, so Pheebs, we still on for tonight?
Ross: Yeah well, he's not gonna get this one. Ben is way cuter than that kid. I mean look at him, look at you, (Starts to whine like a baby and Joey just glares at him.)
MONICA: Joey they're not real. I start miles beneath the surface of these things, ok, they're fake. See [squeezes her breast] honk honk.
Ross: Oh, I am sorry, did you not like her, because I was hoping that we could come to one of your kissing parties onthe balcony.
Phoebe: What a mean thing to say! I would never tell you its not your birthday!
Chandler: Theyre not gonna swallow anything, you guys are being way over protective. When I was a kid, my mom used to just throw me into a pile of broken glass!
Ross: No, no, that's not where I was going. Er, if you get in the... way, of us becoming a thing, then I would be, well, very sad.
Chandler: (looking) Oh, this is not that bad.
Monica: (wiping her nose) I have not been sick in over three years! (Sneezes.)
Rachel: No! No, I am not getting in a car with Ross, we will just have to live here!
Janine: No! Of course we can still hang out with them. Just yknow, not two nights in a row. Okay?
Rachel: What? Guys, I'm not.
Ross: Well, I was with Carol for like eight years and I lost her. And now if it's possible I think I love you even more. So, it's hard for me to believe that I'm not gonna, well that someone else is not going to take you away.
Monica: (shocked) You're not gonna be here New Year's Eve??
Chandler: Could you not narrate?
Ross: No, it's not just that. It's justI want someone who... who does something for me, y'know? Who gets my heart pounding, who... who makes me, uh... (begins to stare lovingly at Rachel)
Rachel: All right, so are we not having dinner at all?
Carol: Hello? It's not gonna be Helen Geller.
Monica: Hello, people who do not live here.
Chandler (nearly weeping): I was not ready for this today!
Rachel: I, I didn't say any... I sw... I did not say anything, I swear. He stopped by.
Chandler: Come on, Ross, you gotta get back in the game here, ok? The Rachel thing's not happening, your ex-wife is a lesbianI don't think we need a third...
Chandler: Not a one.
Rachel: Oh, not much. I-I got a job.
Ross: Me. Was that not clear? Hey, why don't, um, why don't I just join you both, here?
Mr Zelner: This may surprise you, but re-hiring fired employees, is not my main job.
Ross: No, youve heard my practice. Okay? Just-just give me a chance to perform for you and then decide whatever you want. And Im not going to tell you what song Im gonna play either. But uh, lets just say when its over Ill bet there will be a we bit o celebration.
Joey: But I counted, you're not supposed to live here! Oh man! (Runs away.)
Woman: Yeah, well, now you're kinda not.
Rachel: Seriously Pheebs, it's not gonna be that kind of a party.
Phoebe: Okay. Then, take the tiara back and let me hold the musket again. (He hands it to her and Phoebe poses in front of one of those small mirrors.) Somethings missing. Its not Okay oh, let me see the ring my friend picked out.
Joey: Get the ball, ready? Get the ball, get the ball! (Joey pretends to throw it, but really doesnt, and the dog goes running off.) Well, youre cute, but youre not too smart!
Monica: You guys, I am not that bad!
Phoebe: No I'm not. No! If anything I'm making you look better! They'll see you talking to me and that's--I'm a hit!
Monica: Well, go over to her! She's not with anyone.
Joey: Maybe you can tell me. My agent would like to know why I didn't show up at the audition I didn't know I had today. The first good thing she gets me in weeks. How could you not give me the message?!
Ross: Well ah, Aunt Silvia was, well not a nice person.
Rachel: Sometimes just nodding is ok. (pause) Uhm, so but anyway, listen, not marrying Barry was the best decision that I ever, ever made. Honey, you deserve true love. Your soulmate is out there, somewhere. Someone that is your age, that is smart, that is fun and that you care about!
Chandler: And yet, believable. So I decided not to fire her again until I can be assured that she will be no threat to herself, or others.
Monica: Why not?
Aurora: It's not Rick.
Ross: Can you please not do that feet first? You know where his injury is! Severed toe, you just said it!
Chandler: C'mon, we're great together, why not?
JOEY: Can't help you, I'm not wearing any.
Hypnosis Tape: You are falling fast asleep. Deeper. Deeper. Deeper. You are now completely asleep. You dont need to smoke. Cigarettes dont control you. You are a strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke. A strong, confident woman.
Joey: Oh my God! Thats huge! (Hugs him.) Wait a minute, why come I wasnt invited? And who was going to be your best man? Dont say, "Ross." Do not say, "Ross."
Rachel: Im not going to sleep with Ralph Lauren. I mean, I could, but I wouldnt.
Joey: Good, and hey! My treat. (He turns to go into his bedroom then stops.) But that's only because you're not eating anything, right?
Ross: Uh, no, no, see, because not...not all guys are going to be a Paolo.
Monica: You did not go!
Carol: Ross. You're not actually suggesting Helen Willick-Bunch-Geller? 'Cause I think that borders on child abuse.
Ross: (acts surprised) What? (pause) Why not?
Ross: No, no, no. I'm not in the zone.
Monica: Why not?
Joey: Uh no, not really. It's an independent film y'know? So we don't have a real big budget. I figured I'd just stay in your room.
Monica: No, you are not. We tell you stuff.
Phoebe: Yes, and it is my dying wish to have that ring. See, if Im not buried with that ring then my spirit is going to wander the nether world for all eternity
Rachel: Okay Monica, what are you doing? You're gonna lose your job! This is not you!
Chandler: All right look, if youre not gonna stay for me, then at least stay for them! Okay, they have had a very difficult year! What with the robbery and all!
Rachel: That's not European!
Rachel: You know what, we just say that she said it was 5 o'clock. We'll just act casual. We're not late, we're right on time. (When she finishes talking, a note is pushed from under Monica's and Chandler's door, into the hall. Ross picks it up and reads it out loud)
Joey: Uhh, thats not them. Im gonna go call the police.
Joey: I dont know! But he did not eat your face cream!
Joey: Not me.
Chandler: Oh, dont say that! Dont say that. Thats not true. Is it?
Joey: What theyre not invited?! Oh no, thats terrible! Theyre gonna be crushed!
Ross: Of course not, I'm... suggesting Geller-Willick-Bunch.
Phoebe: Maybe that's 'cause she's not really gone.
Ross: (sarcastic) I don't see why not.
(Mr. Douglas screws up his eyes, trying to credit what Bing has just said, but turning to follow Nina down the corridor, he realises Bing must be telling the truth, since he would not have any personal interest in the girl, would he?)
Janice: Oh, too soon, too schmoon. Face it honey, I am not letting you get away this time.
Chandler: All right, but I should warn you, Im not going. Im going. (Does The Face while saying that last part.)
Ross: Oh, I hope they're not ruined.
Monica: My God! Chandler, we said be 'aloof' not 'a doof'.
Ross: No, they're not.
Monica: I am not wrong.
Chandler: it was like the Algonquin kids table. (They all laugh, but Joey only laughs not to be left out.)
Fake Monica: That I was not expecting.
Ross: But I'm not! (pause). You know what if you're in the mood for Thai food...
Ross: You're not serious, I mean, you really... you really talk to it?
Chandler: Im sorry. Im-Im-Im sorry that I said I was going to when Im not. Look, this has nothing to do with you, y'know? And this isnt Rachels fault. Its me. I have serious, serious problems when it comes to women. I have issues with commitment, intimacy, (pause) mascara goop. And Im really sorry, its just that this is not, this isnt going to work out.
Monica: Yknow, no point in dragging it out. Dragging out the long process of you moving out and us not living together anymore.
Monica: That's not a question.
Ross: Oh, please. I am not singing to your stomach, ok?
Joey: Nope, not that one.
Monica: Well, not... worried, just... wondering.
Monica: (very emotional) Because... We may not be who she thinks we are but no-one will ever love that baby more than us.
JOEY: So, you're not mad at me for getting fired and everything?
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is getting ready to sing. Joey is not there.]
Monica: How can you smoke in this day of age? Do you not seen that ad with a little kid walks to grandpa, it�s chilling.
Ross: Okay, look, he's not gonna hurt them, right?
Joey: Well, not so good. She definitely thinks tonight is the night we're gonna... complete the transaction, if you know what I...
Ross: Hey, y'know, this is so not what I needed right now.
Phoebe: So-so you're really not going?
Joey: Yeah, but it's not gonna last. She's too much for me in bed. Sexually.
Chandler: You can say that because she's not your mom.
Chandler: What...? That's not you! Life is good again! Ride 'em cowgirl!