words in movies
JOEY: There's my scene, there's my scene. [Joey on tv] "Mrs. Wallace, I'm Dr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon.
MRS. WALLACE: Is she gonna be all right?
PHOEBE: Yeah, um, she was 82 years old. Her name was um, Mrs. Adelman.
PHOEBE: [Mrs. Adelman's voice] Talk about crap. Try listening to Stella Niedman tell the story of her and Rod Steiger for the hundredth time.
PHOEBE: I don't know. I mean, she obviously has some kind of unfinished business. [Mrs. Adelman's voice] Sit up!
MRS. GREEN: [entering] There she is.
MRS GREEN: Sweetie! So this is where you work? Oh, it's wonderful! Is it a living room? Is it a restaurant? Who can tell? But I guess that's the fun.
MRS GREEN: Monica! You look gorgeous! Last time I saw you, it was eat or be eaten.
MRS GREEN: Oh hello, Ross.
ROSS: Hi, Mrs. Green. [He gets up to shake her hand, but she ignores him.]
MRS GREEN: So, what do you think of my daughter in the apron with the big job?
MRS GREEN: If you didn't pour the coffee, no one would have anything to drink.
MRS GREEN: This is just so exciting. You know, I never worked. I went straight from my father's house to the sorority house to my husband's house. I am just so proud of you.
MRS GREEN: Yes.
MRS GREEN: Oh my god, there's an unattractive nude man playing the cello.
MRS GREEN: [laughing] You have some life here, sweetie.
MRS GREEN: I do. You didn't love Barry. And I've never seen you this happy. I look at you and I think, oh, this is what I want.
MRS GREEN: Well, not just for you.
MRS GREEN: I'm uh, considering leaving your father.
PHOEBE: [Mrs. Adelman's voice] In my day, divorce was not an option.
MRS GREEN: Look at this.
MRS GREEN: Oh, look, here's Barry. Did he have to come straight from the office?
PHOEBE: Yeah. I guess she hasn't seen everything yet. I'll be right back, she has to go to the bathroom again. [Takes Mrs. Green's chin in her hand and says, in Mrs. Adelman's voice] Oh, such a pretty face.
MRS GREEN: This is so much fun, just the girls. You know what we should do? Does anybody have any marijuana?
MRS GREEN: That's fine. I never did it. I just thought I might. So, what's new in sex?
MRS GREEN: The only man I've ever been with is your father.
MRS GREEN: I mean, this is no offense to your dad, sweetie, but I was thinking there might be more.
MRS GREEN: No.
MRS GREEN: No.
MRS GREEN: I guess I just figured of all people you would understand this.
MRS GREEN: You didn't marry your Barry. I did.
PHOEBE: [Mrs. Adelman's voice] Butterscotch? No one? All right, you'll be sorry later.
PHOEBE: [Mrs. Adelman's voice] Oh my god. Now I've seen everything! [Phoebe's voice] Whoa, she's gone. She's gone. She's gone! Go ahead, get married. Go, go.
MRS GREEN: Oh, am I! I just danced with a wonderfully large woman. And three other girls made eyes at me over the buffet. Oh, I'm not saying it's something I wanna pursue, but it's nice to know I have options.
Rachel: Yes, so close. Mrs. Lynch, I know that this is an emotional and difficult time, for all of us. But by any chance did Joanna send any paperwork your way before it happened.
MRS. GELLER: Oh, Jack look, there's that house paint commercial that cracks you up. [the Gellers return to watching TV and Ross goes over to Monica]
Monica: I really like to say that Im-um (Pause) Yknow what Id really like to say? Im drunk!! (Mrs. Geller pulls the camera down.) Thats right mom and dad your little Harmonica is hammered!! (Ross grabs the camera out of his dads hands.) And guess what! Ive been drunk before! And Ive smoked a cigarette! And I got a box of Ding-Dongs hidden in my underwear drawer! Its all okay. Its okay because I turned thirty today. And, and I can do anything I want! Because I am a grown up. (Falls over sideways with Ross filming the fall.)
MRS BUFFAY: Schnoodle. Oh my God, what the hell happened to my dog?
MRS BUFFAY: Yeah. Frank.
MRS BUFFAY: What are these, stitches?
MRS. GELLER: She never tells us anything. Ross, did you know Monica's seeing someone?
MRS. GREENE: Well, my goodness, what was that?
MRS. GREENE: You thought I was Rachel?
MRS. GREENE: Happy birthday sweetie.
MRS. GREENE: Happy birthday sweetie.
MRS. GREENE: Ross, what're you doing.
Mrs. Geller: Its nothing, its just that now your Father owes me five dollars.
MRS. GREENE: You wear bi-focals?
MRS. GELLER: Ross, whose glasses are those?
[Time lapse. The gang is sitting down for Thanksgiving dinner. Chandler is at the head of the table, Mr and Mrs Geller are to his right. Joey and Ross are to his left. Monica is serving things. Phoebe is in the living room and Rachel is at the sink.]
Mrs. Geller: No, I'd be hearing about 'Why didn't I get the honey-glazed ham?', I didn't spend enough on flowers, and if I spent more she'd be saying 'Why are you wasting your money? I don't need flowers, I'm dead'.
MRS. GELLER: Oh, Jack.
MRS. WINEBURG: You told me you didn't see anything.
[Scene: Mrs. Verhoevens Apartment, Ross is back to inquire about the elder Verhoevens health or lack there of.]
MRS. GREENE: Alright, Monica dear, I'm gonna hit the road. Now I've left my 10 verbs on the table. And you be sure and send me that finished poem.
MRS. GREENE: Hi Monica.
RACHEL: Oh hi, Mr. Wineburg, hi Mrs. Wineburg.
MRS. GELLER: Oh, we were so sorry to hear about your parents splitting up, dear.
Phoebe: Mrs. Waltham. Hi. Its Phoebe again.
Mrs. Green: Well uh, I dont have a gift because I wasnt invited until the last minute, but thank you so much for bringing that to everyones attention.
MRS. GELLER: Richard. Richard. Your son isn't seeing anyone is he?
MRS. GELLER: You were fired? What're you gonna do?
Monica: Excuse me, Mrs. Burkart? Well, we're all cleaned up in the kitchen.
MRS. GELLER: Which one? Which button, Jack.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, she just graduated, and she wants to be something in cooking, or food, or.... I don't know. Anyway, I told her you had a restaurant-
Phoebe: Oh no, it is forbidden! No-no, Mrs. Potter fires people for fooling around with clients. And its against my oath as a masseuse.
Mrs. Geller: Honestly! Ross, this isnt just some girl you picked up in a bar and humped. A child should have a family.
Mrs. Green: Its like youre a cave person. Rachel, you must get a nanny. You dont know how overwhelming this is going to be. I mean when you were a baby I had full time help, I had Mrs. Kay.
Mrs. Geller: We know how expensive weddings can be, besides this may be the only wedding we get to throw (patting Monica on the shoulder.).
(Mrs. Walthams phone rings and she answers it.)
MRS. GELLER: Jack, give me that. Talk to your son.
MRS. GELLER: Oh hi kids. Hi darling.
Mrs. Geller: Sweetie, you think you can get in there?
Mrs. Geller: Oh, maybe that's it.
MRS. GELLER: Dance with your father.
MRS. GREENE: Oh well thank you. Such a gentleman. Thank you. [Chandler takes the hot pink coat and grimaces at it] Ahh, it all looks so nice, so festive, all the balloons... [Chandler, remembering that Joey and Mr. Greene are in the bedroom, throws her coat in a cupboard] The funniest thing happened to me on the way here. I was...[Joey peeks out]
Rachel: It's not! I'm defrosting a chicken. (Pause) Oh, I uh sold Mrs. Whiskerson.
Mrs. Geller: (rubbing her temples) Thats alot of information to get in in thirty seconds! Alright Joey, if wanna leave, just leave. Rachel, no you werent supposed to put beef in the trifle. It did not taste good. Phoebe, Im sorry, but I think Jacques Cousteau is dead. (Phoebe makes a sad face.) Monica, why you felt you had to hide the fact that you were in an important relationship is beyond me.
Ross: I-I heard about Mrs. Verhoeven passing away and Im so sorry for your loss.
Mrs. Green: All right you two, Im gonna get going.
[Scene: The Geller household kitchen, Monica and Phoebe are cooking for Mrs. Gellers party.]
Mrs. Tribbiani: I came to give you this (Gives him a bag of groceries) and this. (Whacks him round the ear)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Mr. and Mrs. Geller are watching tennis on TV, Monica is sitting at the table]
MRS BUFFAY: Yeah well, thanks for bringing back what's left of him.
MRS. GELLER: [to Ross on the stairs] I have a wonderful idea. You should take Rachel to the prom.
MRS. GELLER: Get a shot of Monica. Where's Monica.
Mrs. Bing: Car's waiting downstairs, I just wanted to drop off these copies of my book for your friends. Anything you want from Lisbon?
MRS. GELLER: So Jack, you ever think about trading me in for a younger model?
MRS. GELLER: It seems your daughter and Richard are something of an item.
Mrs. Green: Sweetheart I know youre gonna be terrific mom, I just think you need a little help, especially at the beginning.
Mrs. Geller: Me? I'm fine, fine. I'm glad you're here. ...What's with your hair?
Mrs. Bing: Oh honey! This is so exciting! I thought we screwed you up so bad this day would never come. Oh and just think. Soon therell be lots of little Bings. (He freaks out and loosens the tie again.)
Frank: Hi, Mrs. Knight.
MRS. GREENE: ...the scotch and the cigarettes...
[Scene: The Hospital, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are there, along with Aunt Lillian. Ross and Monica enter and everyone says hi and kisses.)
Rachel: Mrs. Kay! Oh yeah, she was sweet. She taught me Spanish. I actually think I remember some of it, tu madre es loca. (I think thats your mothers crazy.)
[Mrs. Geller and Ross both enter]
Mrs. Geller: Just think about it. If you dont, Ill talk more about humping.
Mrs. Geller: Um-hmm.
Mrs. Geller: Whats this? Blue nail polish?
Mrs. Geller: Yes, well I was wrong, and I have to say you really impressed me today.
Mrs. Geller: It really was. Oh, c'mere, sweetheart. (Hugs her) Y'know, I think it might be time for you to start using night cream.
MRS. GREENE: Oh, I missed you kids. Well, should I put my coat in the bedroom?
Mrs. Burkart: All right. I'll get my bag.
Rachel: Barry, I'm sorry... I am so sorry... I know you probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making love with your socks on, but it isn't... it isn't, it's about me, and I ju- (She stops talking and dials the phone.) Hi, machine cut me off again... anyway...look, look, I know that some girl is going to be incredibly lucky to become Mrs. Barry Finkel, but it isn't me, it's not me. And not that I have any idea who me is right now, but you just have to give me a chance too... (The maching cuts her off again and she redials.)
Mrs. Burkart: Oh, good. Thank you.
Mrs. Burkart: (Singing) Come on along and listen to...
Mrs. Burkart: (Singing) ...the lullabye of...
Mrs. Geller: No, I have faith
Mrs. Green: Well then you really dont need me to live with you.
MRS. GELLER: Jack. Could you come in here for a moment? NOW!
MRS. GREENE: Oh, you kids [she caresses his face and chest] Well, this is the best party I've been to in years.
Mrs. Geller: (laughs) Im not freaking out.
Phoebe: Good. (Phoebe and Mrs. Burkart go into the other room, leaving Monica with everyone staring at her.)
Rachel: So, come on, what was the big news Pete wanted to tell you Mon?! Or should I say Mrs. Monica Becker?
Mrs. Lynch: I know!
JOEY: Thanks for coming Mrs. Greene. [grabs her and kisses her to distract her. She goes limp in his arms. Mr. Greene leaves.] Well, ok, you take care.
MRS. GREENE: Oh, scotch neat. Ya know, that's Rachel's father's drink.
Mrs. Potter: Mr. Simons been waiting for(sees Phoebe and Rick) Oh my God!
MRS. GELLER: Almost time for cake.
Mrs. Lynch: I notice that youve been trusted with a lot of rather important responsibilities.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Mrs. Green is telling Ross what needs to be done to baby proof his apartment.]
Frank: Well um, I was in ah Mrs. Knights ah, I mean Alice, sorry, Alice, I always do that. I was in her ah, Home Ec class.
Mrs. Geller: I thought it was quite tasty.
Mrs. Lynch: Oh my goodness! You havent heard!
MRS. GREENE: He always ridiculed my pottery classs...
Mrs. Geller: (stopping him) Dont get up Jack! The safety pins are about to blow.
Mrs. Lynch: Joanna passed away last night.
Mrs. Bing: You are gonna be fine, believe me.
Rachel: Hello, Mrs. Chatracus.
[Scene: The Geller household kitchen, Mrs. Geller is cooking and Rachel, post nose job, is helping her.]
Mrs. Geller: No-no-no, that was all true. This was just in case you pulled a Monica.
[Scene: The Bing household, Mr. and Mrs. Bing and Young Chandler are eating Thanksgiving dinner as a housekeeper serves them.]
[cut to the living room where Mrs. Burkart is now performing.]