words in movies
[Scene: Chandler's Office. Chandler is playing with a toy as his boss Mr. Douglas knocks and opens the door.]
Chandler: Mr. D, hows it going, sir?
Mr. Douglas: Ohh, its been better. The Annual Net Usage Statistics are in.
Mr. Douglas: Its pretty ugly. We havent seen an ANUS this bad since the seventies.
Mr. Douglas: Well, were gonna be layin off people in every department.
Mr. Douglas: Not you. Relax. Ever have to fire anyone?
(She rises, dragging Chandler along by the wool. Rachel has to leap over a chair to follow them. Monica opens the door to find Mr. Heckles standing there.)
Monica: Oh. Hi, Mr.Heckles.
Mr.Heckles: Youre doing it again.
Mr.Heckles: I can hear you through the ceiling. My cats cant sleep.
Mr.Heckles: I could have cats.
Monica: (Closing the door) Goodbye Mr.Heckles.
Mr. Douglas: Nina.
Nina: Mr.Douglas... (flirting defensively) ..cool tie.
(She escapes, fortunately so distracting Mr. Douglas, that he misses Chandlers expression of alarm & guilt.)
Mr. Douglas: (Shutting the door, then pointing vaguely at Ninas shapely departure) Shes still here.
Mr. Douglas: Youre kidding? She seems so...
Mr. Douglas: Thats unbelievable.
Mr. Douglas: I see. I guess you never really know whats goin on inside a persons head.
(Mr. Douglas screws up his eyes, trying to credit what Bing has just said, but turning to follow Nina down the corridor, he realises Bing must be telling the truth, since he would not have any personal interest in the girl, would he?)
(In the apartment below, Mr.Heckles is trying to relax and read his newspaper, but Rachel is helplessly dangling upside-down with her ankle wrapped up in the Christmas lights.)
Rachel: (To Monica) Im okay! Im okay! (She knocks on Mr. Heckles's window.) Mr. Heckles, Mr. Heckles could you help me please?
Mr.Heckles: See, this is just the kind of thing I was talking about.
(inside Chandlers apartment, Chandler is coming in from his bedroom, sees Mr. Heckles, and screams.)
MR. GELLER: C'mon kid, let's go.
[Scene: Mr. Ratstatter's office. Monica is there.]
Monica: (on phone) Awww, y'know what your nickname is, Mr. Big
MR. TREEGER: No can do, like I told the girl, I can't get a new knob until Thursday.
Phoebe: Sounds like somebody wants to be Mr. Pizza Delivery Girl.
LITTLE BULLY: Us, what about you guys? Man you really, bing, gave it to old Mr. Clean back there. He was a big guy.
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey and Sandy are sitting at the kitchen counter. Joey is holding mr. Wigglemunch, and Sandy holds the Grumpus.]
Jill: Oh, Mr. Scientist has to get all technical!
Mr. Zelner: Come on in.
Mr. Waltham: Excuse me, Im standing right here!
Mr. Geller: Well, its time for a new family to start their memories here and hopefully their check will clear before they find the crack in the foundation and the asbestos in the ceiling.
CHANDLER: Oh, yeah, easy for you to say, you don't have to walk around sporting some reject from the Mr. T collection. [Joey walks in behind Chandler]
Mr. Oberblau: I'm just saying, I have a cabin in the Adirondacks if you ever want to get away from the city, well, that'd be (pause) just nifty!
Mr. Geller: Everyone thinks they know me. Everyone says 'Jack Geller, so predictable'. Maybe after I'm gone, they'll say 'Buried at sea! Huh!'.
MR. GELLER: When did I say that?
Chandler: Theres a Mr. Bing!
MR. GREENE: I have to be heading to my chateau, thank you.
Mrs. Geller: (To Mr. Geller) This is worse than when he married the lesbian.
Ross: Of course, of course, Mr. Stevens.
Rachel: (chasing after him) Oh, wait! Sorry, Mr. Paul? Mr. Paul?
Paul: I usually prefer Elizabeths boyfriends to address me as Mr. Stevens.
Mr. Geller: I always thought that too. Tell me, what does your father do?
Ross: Well we-we dont know for sure. But in my head it-it sounded something like this. (He makes a high pitched noise and Alan doesnt know what to make of it.) Of course, this is just conjecture. Okay, thats uh, thats all for today. (Everyone starts to get up.) Uh Mr. Morse, can I see you for a moment?
Rachel: Ohh, its Joshua invited me to this fancy club opening tonight. But, I already told Mr. Waltham that I would take his niece to this dumb old opera. So What are you gonna do?
Mr. Waltham: You spend half your life in the bathroom, why dont you ever go out the bloody window!
Mr. Geller: No! Thank you! (Hugs Chandler) Monica, and Ross! I dont know what Im gonna do about the two of you!
MR. GELLER: C'mon, it's my birthday.
Mr. Geller: I love you sweetheart. (He kisses her and they sit down.)
Mr. Thompson: Good luck.
Mr. Thompson: Nice to see you Rachel.
(Rachels boss, Mr. Thompson walks up.)
Mr. Thompson: Ohh, nice choice.
Mr. Bowmont: Thats me.
Sarah: Really Mr. Geller, you dont have to do this.
Rachel: Joey! Joey, good one! (Mr. Thompson starts to laugh.)
Mr. Thompson: Thats good. Very good! (Walks away.)
Mr. Geller: (entering) Hi Rachel.
Joey: Uhh, excuse me is there a Mr. Bowmont at this table?
(Mr. Thompson looks shocked and at Rachel, she suddenly starts laughing.)
MR. GELLER: It's the off light. Right Ross? [pans over to see Ross with an afro and moustache]
Mr. Bowmont: I was actually relieved uh I didnt win the boat. My wife wouldve killed me.
Mr. Geller: We have it. Only now, we call it the beach house.
Mr. Geller: What?! They wanted a scary story!
[Scene: The Mr. Bowmont, is tied up alongside the pier; Joey and Rachel are relaxing.]
ROSS: Ohh, big smoker. [Packs the cigarettes and flings one on Mrs. Greene in the process. Finally gets one in his mouth and it look really out of place] Big big smoker. In fact I'm gonna go ou into the hallway and fire up this bad boy. [as he walks into the hall, he comes face to face with Mr. Greene]
Mr. Thompson: Congratulations on your new boat, Joey Tribbiani!!
Mr. Bowmont: I dont think so dear.
[Scene: The Geller household, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are getting ready for Thanksgiving dinner. The doorbell rings.]
Mr. Tribbiani: No, it's only been six years. I just wanted to put a nice memory in your head so you'd know that I wasn't always such a terrible guy. ...Joe. Y'ever been in love?
Mrs. Potter: Mr. Simons been waiting for(sees Phoebe and Rick) Oh my God!
Monica: Excuse me Mr. Mexico.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's party. Mr. Geller and a friend are questioning Richard while Ross observes.]
Mr. Geller: It seemed like such a simple idea.
(They start towards the door but are stopped when Mr. Zelner enters.)
Mr. Treeger:: Okay ahh, well, just ahh, follow my lead. (Turns on some music)
Chandler: He had sex with Mr. Girabaldi!
MR. GELLER: Your mother's right. Take her, you can wear my tux.
Ross: Ooh, well. Ah, I kinda have got a lot on my plate right now, not that I wouldn't love a weekend in the country with a strange man. (Mr. Oberblau giggles)
[Scene: The Mr. Bowmont (Joeys boat), shes shown to be in one of the waterways around New York, but in reality shes in a sound stage on the Warner Bros. lot and we see New York from the water in some rather poor green screen shots. Rachel and Joey are on board.]
Mr. Zelner: You wrote that you have a cute touchie?
Tag: (interrupting) Uh Mr. Zelner, Im the one who filled in that evaluation.
Joey: Who cares?! I-Ill make payments, whatever it takes, I want the Mr. Bowmont!!
Mr. Zelner: Uh actually, Id like to speak with both of you.
Mr. Zelner: Hello Rachel, you uh, got a minute?
Joshua: Yeah, that would be fantastic! My-my nephew is crazy about the Knicks! This is fantastic, thank you so much Rachel. (He takes the tickets and leaves as Mr. Waltham returns.)
MR. TREEGER: He musta been sweepin'. They found a broom in his hand.
Rachel: Someone? I brought people. Mr. Thompson, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, this is Mr. Thompson. (She introduces them.) Hes the head of my department.
Mr. Treeger:: No! Youre clogging up the chute that I spent a half-hour unclogging!
Mr. Geller: So its just your mother then.
MR. TREEGER: There she is. And over there, that's the other one. This is Mr. Buddy Boyle, Mr. Heckles' attorney. He'd like to talk to you.
Mr. Geller: Im here!
Mr. Geller: Oh, yeah you loved that glove! You took it every place you went. You never went any place without that glove.
Mr. Bowmont: I dont think shed like that.
Mr. Geller: Sure!
Mr. Geller: Its the key to my Porsche. Well, the key to your Porsche.
Mr. Geller: Great!
Mr. Geller: Really?
Mr. Geller: Oh my God, does she really thinks that?
Mr. Geller: Crap.
Mr. Geller: (overacting) Thats a good one! Do you hear that Ross? Three days!
Mr. Geller: You dont secretly smoke do you?
[the guys form a wall between Mrs Geller and Mr Geller and dance across the hall as he walks across]
MR. GELLER: I tell you, I've never seen him this happy.
(Joey walks away and Mr. and Mrs. Geller walk up. Mr. Geller is wearing this ancient velvet tuxedo.)
Mr. Treeger:: Look come on, eh, just ah, just ah, put your arms around me, eh.
Mr. Geller: Im afraid so.
Mr. Geller: Oh look, look theres your old makeup kit!
Mr. Franklin: But we really do need to find someone up here. The work is starting to pile up. Ive got a stack of documents on my desk this high. (Holds his hand at shoulder level.)
Rachel: Oh. (they knock at the next door, Mr. Heckles answers) Hi. We just found this cat and we're looking for the owner.
Mr. Geller: (grabbing a glove) This couldve been hers!
Monica: (on phone) Awww, y'know what your nickname is, Mr. Big
Mr. Kaplan: Im not supposed to drink coffee, it makes me gassy.
Monica: Whos Mr. Girabaldi?
MR. GELLER: You're the twinkie?
Mr. Kaplan: (entering) Hows that coffee comin, dear?
Chandler: Mr. and Mrs. Bing! (Walks away.)
[Cut to Mr. and Mrs. Geller talking to Ross.]
Mr. Bing: (entering) Hello all!
Monica: Hi Mr. Bing.