words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is mixing some Thanksgiving treat (Im assuming mashed potatoes) in a bowl.]
Monica: (on phone) Okay, great! Bye. (Hangs up as Chandler enters.) So guess whos coming to Thanksgiving dinner?
Monica: (not amused by Chandlers joke) I miss Rachel. (To Chandler) No, my parents.
[Monica goes to fiddle with something on the table.]
Monica: Yeah, and yknow, if you could not mention to them that we live together, that would be great! (Quickly trying to change subjects), I was thinking we would eat around four.
[Monica goes to the stove.]
Monica: Because they dont know were dating. (Again, trying to quickly change subjects.) Do you think we should eat in the kitchen? (Goes to the sink and the stove to cook.)
Monica: Um, well, I was going to, I-I-I really was. But um, then somewhere, just out of nowhere, I didnt.
Monica: (trying to change subjects, excitedly) So! Dinner in the kitchen around four! Ill see you then. (Pats Chandler on the shoulder and goes into the living room.)
Monica: Well, um, because mainly, um, they dont like you. Im sorry.
Monica: Maybe because you used to be aloof, or that youre really sarcastic, or that, yknow, you joke around all the time. Or that you take off your clothes and throw them on the couch.
Monica: Look, I know that I shouldve told them. I know I shouldnt care what they think. Im sorry.
Monica: You really think thatll work?
Monica: (hugging Chandler) I dont think youll ever get my parents that drunk!
Chandler: Well Monica just told me that they dont.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Phoebe enters with a paper turkey.]
Phoebe: Wow, that sounds great! And what are you making Monica, in case Rachels dessert is...[about to say bad] so good that I eat all of it. Theres none left for anybody else!
[Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel laugh]
Monica: Nothing.
Monica: No, sweetie, I-I trust you.
Monica: Youre not gonna mess it up.
Rachel: Wow, Monica, I love that, you really have faith in me. Thank you. Technical question, how do you know when uh, the butters done?
Monica: Well, its done about two minutes before it looks like that.
Monica: Whoa whoa whoa! Wherere you goin?
Monica: Oh, Janine, the really hot dancer girl?
Monica: Youre not gonna go anywhere, you said you were gonna eat here, and youre gonna eat here!
Monica: Dad [kisses Jack], Mom [kisses Judy]. Look! Look who it is its Chandler!
[Time lapse. The gang is sitting down for Thanksgiving dinner. Chandler is at the head of the table, Mr and Mrs Geller are to his right. Joey and Ross are to his left. Monica is serving things. Phoebe is in the living room and Rachel is at the sink.]
Mr. Geller: Monica, all this food looks wonderful, you should think about doing this for a living.
[Monica rushes over to Chandlers side.]
Monica: Dad, Chandler was just laughing at your joke.
Phoebe: Yeah, I dreamt that he saved me from a burning building and he was so brave and so strong! And its making me look at him totally differently. Yknow, I mean he used to be just, yknow Jack Geller Monica and Rosss dad and now hes hes Jack Geller, dream hunk."
[Time lapse. Ross and Joey are cleaning the table while Judy and Phoebe talk by the window. Jack and Chandler are sitting on the couch while Monica sits on the coffee table.]
Monica: Yknow dad, Chandler is one of Rosss very best friends!
[Chandler and Monica exchange worried looks.]
[Ross and Judy enter the living room. Judy and Ross sit down on the couch beside Jack. Monica and Chandler are sitting on the coffee table.]
Monica: Mom, uh, Chandler was just saying how beautiful your sweater is.
Chandler: Oh, yes. Well its very beautiful. Its cream-colored and tight [Realizes what he just said and looks worried. Monica and Ross also looked shocked. Judy and Jack give Chandler a very dirty look.] I dont mean tight, I mean its not too tight, not that I was looking at-[giving up all hope, he puts his head into his hands.]
Monica: (shocked) What?
[Scene: Rachels Old Bedroom, Continued from earlier. Monica enters the room.]
Monica: Mom and dad just sent me in here to find out if you (points to Chandler) were trying to get Ross stoned!
Monica: Ross, I cant believe youd do that!
Monica: You! Its not like its a big deal! You-you dont still do it or anything!
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Time lapse. Jack is still on the couch, picking his teeth with his feet on the table. Phoebe and Judy are sitting on the table looking at him. Ross and Chandler are sitting by the window talking. Rachel and Joey are in the kitchen fooling with Rachels trifle. Monica walks into the living room from the kitchen.]
Monica: Dad, please dont pick your teeth out here! Alright, and if youre gonna put your feet up, why dont you sit on the-
Phoebe: Monica, leave him alone!
[Monica gives Phoebe a surprised expression and goes over to Ross and Chandler.]
[Chandler and Monica are by the window pressuring Ross to tell his parents the truth.]
Monica: Ross, if you dont tell them, then I will!
[Monica and Chandler make What was that? gestures. Joey and Ross go into Rachels old room.]
[Inside Monica and Chandlers. Joey is almost done explaining the situation to everyone.]
Rachel: Alright, Monica, I want you to have the first taste.
Monica: Really?
[Rachel hands Monica a plate. Monica takes a spoonful of the whipped cream portion.]
Monica: Okay.
[Monica takes a bigger spoonful and a pea falls off]
[Monica puts the pea on top of the spoonful and takes a bite.]
Monica: (faking joy. Rubbing her stomach and smiling at the same time, like Joey said) Mmmm! Its good!
Monica: Its so good, that I feel really selfish about being the only one whos eating it, that I think we should have everyone taste how good it is. Especially Ross.
[Ross glares at Monica.]
Mrs. Geller: (lying) Ive gotta call my friend Mary and tell her how good this is, from Monicas room.
[Jack and Judy exit to Monicas room.]
Monica: (again, lying) Im gonna go into the bathroom so I can look at it in the mirror, as I eat it.
[Monica exits to the bathroom.]
[Jack and Judy come out of Monicas room and sit down on the couch.]
[Rachel and Phoebe walk into the kitchen. Monica comes out of the bathroom and goes over to Ross.]
Monica: Ross? Lets go.
Monica: Alright, you know what? Thats it. Youve had your chance.
Monica: (out loud, to her parents) Mom! Dad! Ross smoked pot in college!
Ross: (in a 5 year olds tone) (To Monica) You are such a tattletale! Mom, Dad, you remember that-that time you walked in my room and smelled marijuana?
Monica: And Dad, yknow that mailman that you got fired? He didnt steal your Playboys! Ross did!
Ross: Yeah, well, Hurricane Gloria didnt break the porch swing, Monica did!
[The Gellers glare at Monica.]
Monica: Ross hasnt worked at the museum for a year!
Ross: Monica and Chandler are living together!
[The Gellers glare at Monica, shocked]
[Monica and Chandler both are shocked. Ross gives Monica a take that! look.]
Monica: Ross married Rachel in Vegas! And got divorced! Again!!!!
Mrs. Geller: (rubbing her temples) Thats alot of information to get in in thirty seconds! Alright Joey, if wanna leave, just leave. Rachel, no you werent supposed to put beef in the trifle. It did not taste good. Phoebe, Im sorry, but I think Jacques Cousteau is dead. (Phoebe makes a sad face.) Monica, why you felt you had to hide the fact that you were in an important relationship is beyond me.
Mrs. Geller: Chandler! Youve been Rosss best friend all these years, stuck by him during the drug problems. (Ross gets disgusted.) And now youve taken on Monica as well. Well, I dont know what to say. Youre a wonderful human being.
Mr. Geller: No! Thank you! (Hugs Chandler) Monica, and Ross! I dont know what Im gonna do about the two of you!
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Everyone is helping clean the table.]
Monica: Well actually, I-I didnt eat mine. Its still in the bathroom.
Mrs. Geller: (pointing to herself and Jack) Well we left ours in Monicas bedroom.
(They grab the luggage and drag it into Joey and Rachels forcing Monica and Chandler to follow.)
MONICA: You know what? I'm not gonna be able to enjoy this.
Monica: Ok, so that's what we're doing. You know, when I'm in the coffee house bopping along to one of your songs, I'm wearing ear plugs.
(Monica, Joey, and Chandler all shake their heads.)
Monica: No, umm, he met some girl at the coffee house.
Monica: And lucky means, more cleavage?
Monica: (entering) Hey!
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: (interrupting) No! You have lasagnas! (Storms out and an awkward silence follows.)
Monica: Hey!
Monica: She said that?!
Monica: Umm
Monica: Why?!
MONICA: Wow. Oh wow. You know I love you too, right.
Monica: So, is Joey gonna stop snoring?
Monica: (laughs) Yes, I did! And you are welcome!
Monica: Come on! Come on, if we have sex again itll double our chances of getting pregnant. Do you think that closets still available?
Monica: Sometimes we were.
Monica: Okay.
Monica: We were shopping, and we had lunch.
Monica: Ross, how long have you been planning this wedding?
Monica: Oh my God, this is great! This is so great! (to Chandler, who looks bewildered). Did you hear that?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the phone rings and Phoebe answers it.]
Monica: Youll see.
Monica: Oh my God! Hes gonna rat me out!
Monica: I got you the foot massager.
Ross: Oh, this is Monica.
Monica: Ohh. And I dont even have a date.
Chandler: Look, I-Im just gonna be right across the hall and I promise you, the minute Monica and I break up Im moving right back in with you!
MONICA: Give it to me.
Monica: Hey.
Monica: (to Chandler) Shh!! (On phone) Wait, what?
Ross and Monica: Dad, dad. We got it!! We Got It!!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is entering, Monica and Rachel are talking on the couch.]
Monica: I'll get it! (She runs in, and she's her old fat self like The One With The Prom Video. Not only that, she's out of breath after running a short distance. She goes over and opens the door to reveal Rachel with her old nose.) Happy Thanksgiving!
Monica: Oh, you really want to talk about getting people to like you huh, funny man? (Joey laughs but stops when Chandler turns to glare at him.)
Chandler: (To Phoebe, behind Monica's back) Still terrified, I'll take care of it. No problem. (When Monica turns back he smiles and kisses her, when she turns away he nods that he'll do it to Phoebe.)
Fat Monica: Umm, Chandler, if you want I can make you some macaroni and cheese for dinner.
Monica: Phoebe, they didnt make you pay for those knives, did they?
Monica: Well, thanks, we like him.
Monica: I was laughing. (Patting him on the knee.)
Monica: But more importantly to full well-rounded lives.
Monica: Hello? (Listens) Oh yes, one minute please. (To Phoebe) Its for you. Its the fire inspector.
(As she is drinking, Monica laughs and Chandler's joke and Diet Coke comes out of her nose.)
(Chandlers trying to console Monica.)
(She grabs her bag and leaves, Joey moves a little quicker to his apartment, leaving Monica and Chandler alone.)
Monica: Then why would he say it?
Monica: Would you stop? Weve only been going out a couple of weeks, I mean we dont even know if hes gonna propose.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the guys are teaching the girls how to play poker.]
Monica: Yep, yep...You?
Chandler: (to Ross) Dont try to sway her. (To Monica) (Softly) Im your only chance to have a baby. Okay, lets go.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler has fallen asleep reading a book. Monica calls from the bedroom and wakes him up.]
Phoebe: Yuh-huh! I was the last one to know when Chandler got bitten by the peacock at the zoo. I was the last one to know when you had a crush on Joey when he was moving in. (Monica gestures at Phoebe to shut up; Joey looks surprised but pleased) Looks like I was second to last.
Monica: Hi Amanda! Actually now... it’s... is not a good time. Dinner tomorrow night? (Phoebe mouths 'no') Ok, Phoebe and I will see you then!
Monica: No, no, no. They say it's the same as the distance from the tip of a guy's thumb to the tip of his index finger.
Joey: Have you seen Monica?
Monica: Ok, thank you.(the man leaves) Uh, well this is it. Are you OK?
Monica: Chicken Kiev?
[ Scene: Rachel and Joey's apartment. Chandler, Monica and Emma are sitting on the floor, and Emma's stuffed animals are lined up in front of them.]
Monica: Well, I love it. I only hope my wedding looks this good.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Fat Monica, and her boyfriend are sitting on the couch. Monicas boyfriend is getting up to get something. For future reference, for the rest of this episode Monicas fat, I wont be calling her Fat Monica throughout.]
Monica: (Tiny laugh) yep, that's me, (tiny laugh) I am that stupid (tiny laugh).
Ross: So unbelievable. She was supposed to meet me half an hour ago with Emma. (he tries to take a cookie but Monica slaps his hand)
MONICA: You would not. I can't believe this. I hate this, you're too normal. I can't believe my boyfriend doesn't have a thing. My boyfriend doesn't have a thing.
Monica: What were we thinking?
Monica: Stupid.
Monica: Oh yeah. Definitely.
Monica: Okay, does it involve something to do with Petes computer company?
Monica: Ohh... that wouldn't by any chance be... Joey Tribbiani?
Monica: Hey.
Monica: Ill meet you there in two minutes.
Monica: Only here.
Monica: See, Ive been waiting my whole life to be engaged, and unlike some people Im only planning on doing this once. So, uh yknow, maybe this is selfish and Im sorry about it, but I was kinda hoping tonight could just be about that.
Monica: Oh, I-I dont know.
Rachel: Monica, what should I do?
Monica: Why?!
Monica: Ill call you back. (starts kissing him)
Monica: All right. (Goes to take off the dress.)
Monica: Thats true.
Monica: (entering) Hey, guys. Im here to pick out my Christmas tree.
Fat Monica: Call them mom and dad you loser!
Monica: All right. Umm, you could uh start out with a little 1, a 2, a 1-2-3, 3, 5, a 4, a 3-2, 2, a 2-4-6, 2-4-6, 4, (Rachel starts getting worked up) 2, 2, 4-7, 5-7, 6-7, 7 7.. 7 7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7 (mouths 7)! (They both lean back on the couch satisfied.)
Monica: Oh my God, Rachel! Hi!
Monica: Great
Ross: (in a high pitched voice) Monica!
Monica: No time for that!
Monica: You really think this is okay?
Monica: Okay!
Monica: Or 45.
Monica: Yeah, I think you should keep looking!
Monica: You didnt find her?
Monica: Didnt your dad used to call you Pumpkin?
Chandler: (To Monica) I love you. And I know about the baby.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier.]
Monica: Ha ha, a joke thats funny in all countries.
Fat Monica: Hey Chandler! Did you like the macaroni and cheese?
Fat Monica: Okay!
Monica: 'I drink tea.'
Monica: Im changing out of this.
Phoebe: Okay, umm, if a kid gets straight As, his parents would say, "Yeah, he pulled a Monica." Y'know? Or a fireman saves a baby, and they go, "Yeah I know, he pulled a Monica." Or someone hits a homerun and the announcer says, "Yeah, that ones outta here." Though some things dont change.