words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica, Rachel, Ross, and Phoebe are there. Phoebe is looking out the window.]
MONICA: Oh, actually this year we just made him homemade cookies.
MONICA: Money is so impersonal. Cookies says someone really cares. . . Alright, we're broke, but cookies do say that.
MONICA: Oh, and the newspaper delivery guy.
MONICA: Oh look, and he did my crossword puzzle.
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica, Chandler, and Joey are seated at couches. Rachel is working behind the counter.]
CHANDLER, MONICA, and JOEY: Hey.
CHANDLER, MONICA, and JOEY: Hey.
MONICA: Cute.
MONICA: Ross, that is gorgeous!
MONICA: Look at these authentic fake medals. I tell ya, mom's gonna be voted best dressed at the make-believe military academy.
MONICA: Honey, uh, this is a picture of the frame guy posing in front of a bright blue screen with a collie.
MONICA: Oh, wait a minute honey.
MONICA: Wow.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel, Chandler, and Joey are decorating the Christmas tree.]
[Monica and Ross enter.]
MONICA: Hi.
MONICA: I hope she's OK.
MONICA: How do you know exactly what she's going through?
CHANDLER: So whaddya got there Monica?
MONICA: Just some stuff for the party.
MONICA: You guys haven't gotten your presents yet? Tomorrow's Christmas Eve, what're ya gonna do?
MONICA: Well, maybe the mailman liked the cookies, we just didn't give him enough.
JOEY: Monica, pigeons learn faster that you.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica is preparing for the party with Ross questioning her.]
MONICA: For the sixteenth time, no... I do not think you're obsessive.
MONICA: Rach, get the heat. [Rachel holds up her hand with wet fingernail polish] Ross, could you turn the heat down please?
MONICA: Ross, the heat!
MONICA: Well put it back.
MONICA: Here, let me try.
MONICA: Hey, it's Funny's cousin, Not Funny.
MONICA: No, if he doesn't like our cookies, too bad, I am not gonna be blackmailed. Look if worse comes to worse, it gets a little warm, we'll call it a theme party.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. They are having their party. All the guests are stripped down because of the heat.]
MONICA: [carrying an ice cube tray] Ice, ice, ice squares anyone? Take a napkin. Alright.
ROSS: Monica, Monica, your guest are turning into jerky, OK.
MONICA: Really? I'm perfectly comfortable. [one of the guest opens the refrigerator] Hey, hey, hey, get in line buddy, I was next. [she opens the refrigerator and leans into it]
[Ross is speaking to Monica and Rachel about tipping the super.]
ROSS: Alright, alright, here's the chance. Monica give him cash, Rachel give him your earrings. Something, now, anything. MONICA: No, I will not cave. RACHEL: Yeah, I'm with Mon. ROSS: Alright, alright, you know how you say I never seize the day? Well, alright, even though he's your super, I'm seizing. [approaches Mr. Treeger] Mr. Treeger, here is 50 bucks, merry Christmas. [Gives him the cash.]
MONICA: Ross.
MONICA: [to Ross] Looks like he's playin' baseball.
MONICA: Whatever.
MONICA: So, wait, you really did like my cookies?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Ross, Monica, and Rachel are sitting around after the party. Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe enter.]
MONICA: Hey, we could have used that kind of thinkin' earlier.
MONICA: Honey, I'm sorry.
CHANDLER: Hey, guys, it's after midnight, merry Christmas everyone. [Ross and Phoebe hug, Monica and Rachel hug, Chandler is left standing]
JOEY: Hey, Monica, the knob was broken so I just turned it off from underneath, I hope that's alright.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Joey and Chandler are giving out their Christmas presents out of a cardboard box from a case of motor oil.]
[Chandler and Joey give Monica a pack of condoms.]
JOEY: They're ribbed for your pleasure. [Ross and Monica trade their gifts.]
Ross: Monica? You're Mom.
Monica: Yeah, sure... uhm, I'm devastated, obviously... (to the rest) Did you think the neighborhood was homey? (Chandler enters)
Monica: For what?
Monica: (trying not to laugh) Oh my God.
Monica: Alright, alright, alright...
Monica: Oh, you got the whole night, huh?
Monica: You got the job?! Why didnt you tell me?
Fake Monica: I thought that movie was so incredibly... boring. I mean, that thing at the end where the kid kills himself because he can't be in the play? What was that?! It's like, kid, wait a year, leave home, do some community theatre. I walked out of there and I thought, 'Now, that's two hours of my life that I'm never getting back.' And that thought scared me more than all the other crap I was afraid to do.
Monica: Whose little ball of paper is this?!
Chandler: (arm-in-arm with Monica) Hey Pheebs!
Monica: Look, I- I could go on pretending-
[Scene: Fancy restaurant, Monica, Joey, Angela, and Bob are seated at the table.]
Monica: Matt Guire, Mark Lynn, Ben Wire
Monica: (stands up to hand Emma back) Oh no no no no!
Monica: (leaping off of the couch and runs up) Wait! Did you say 'G.Stephanopoulos?'
Monica: My brother's going through that right now, he's such a mess. How did you get through it?
Monica: Maybe this wasn't your shot.
Monica: I think he's shy.
Monica: We're kidding. C'mon, tell us!
Monica: Yeah, the best you got in high school was Wet Pants Geller.
Ross: (Doing the spinning) Okay, Monica: Right foot red.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone with her mother. Phoebe, Rachel, and Ross are there.]
Phoebe: She's already fluffed that pillow... Monica, you know, you've already fluffed that- (Monica glares at her.) -but, it's fine!
Monica: Oh, George, baby, drop the towel!
(After he closes the door, Monica starts to follow him, but thinks better of it and stops.)
Monica: Noooo! (Comes closer and whispers) I'm lying. I am so drunk.
Monica: My boots in tan! Hey! Can you get a little closer so I can see the price?
Monica: Phoebe, you get the bear, uhm, Joey, you get the robot, and Chandler and I get the dog. Ok, and the race is going to go (Takes two cups and marks the start and finish lines with them) from here to here. Now the one who comes in last, stays!
Rachel: Oh God, oh. Great, Monica, y'know what, you could've called, I have been up here, I've been worried...
Monica: Ohh! Ohhhh! Were you sleeping sweetie? Im sorry. Here. (Hands the mug of milk to him.)
Monica: What?
Monica: Hello?
Monica: (to everyone) It's Chandler! (on phone) Are you OK?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, The phone rings; it's Chandler.]
MONICA: No honey. You have to sleep on this side of the bed because I have to sleep on this side of the bed.
Monica: I have no idea what you just said.
Monica: You did not go!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are entering the living room from her bedroom.]
Monica: Oh my God! What were you doing in a library?
Monica: Hey, you better hope that we're pregnant, because one way or another, we're giving a baby back to Rachel.
Monica: Why not?
Monica: Outside.
Monica: And that would be?
Monica: Oh, okay. Here, why dont you let me do it?
Monica: About what?
Monica: My surprise party!
Monica: Joey, what's going on?
Monica: Oh my God! I love him!
Monica: No, you are not. We tell you stuff.
Rachel: Monica? Monica!
Monica: Water rules!
Rachel: Well (At a loss for words, she grabs some of Monica's laundry and throws it on the floor as a diversion to allow Rachel to run back inside and close the door. Monica chases her to find that Rachel had locked the door.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's Balcony, Ross and Rachel are talking.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is coming out of the bathroom after a shower wearing only her bath robe, walks into the kitchen, and opens the fridge. As she bends over to grab a bottle of wine, her robe falls open (Damn this network primetime programming, we didn't see anything!) and she quickly closes it again. But then realizes she didn't have to do that. So she closes the fridge and stands next to the table, thinks about it for a little while and ]
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Phoebe is talking at the phone, Monica is listening amused.]
[Cut to inside. Monica, Joey and Phoebe are singing while outside, Ross and Rachel are trying to get the cat off of Ross' shoulder.]
Monica: Hi!
Monica: Hi!
Monica: What are you doing here? You cant be here!
Monica: (smitten) Hi!
Monica: Hey Frannie, welcome back! How was Florida?
MRS. GELLER: Oh, Jack look, there's that house paint commercial that cracks you up. [the Gellers return to watching TV and Ross goes over to Monica]
Monica: No, it is me! Y'know, I'm not just the person who needs to fluff the pillows and pay the bills as soon as they come in! Y'know, when I'm with her, I am so much more than that. I'm- I'm Monana!
Monica: Oh, is everything in the car?
MONICA: Rose Marie really belongs on a smaller screen, doesn't she?
Monica: Where are we gonna find a tiny little hat?
Monica: Im gonna go across the hall to check on the yams.
Monica: No! No, she doesnt. Uh Phoebe, what she makesthats uhtheyre sock rabbits. They are completely differentOkay! Okay! Okay! I didnt make it! Im sorry! I totally forgot about tonight and the fact that were supposed to make the presents!
(Monica crosses her legs and is still wearing the garter belt.)
Chandler: Well, I tried Billy Jean King, but... (Ross glares at him) you know, you and Monica have the same "I'm gonna kill you" look...? I can usually make it go away by kissing her... (Ross continues to glare at him and Chandler leans in as if he's going to kiss Ross)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is there.)
Monica: I did.
(Monica leaves, and Chandler closes the door. Erica just looks at him.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is standing at the window waving at Ross.]
(Phone rings; Monica gets it)
Monica: What?
Monica: Nothing.
Monica: Oh God!
MONICA: Ya know what, I think I'm gonna go to my room and read Cosmo, maybe there's something helpful in there. Know what, at least maybe I can learn how to do an at home bikini wax with leftover Cristmas candles.
Monica: I know.
Monica: She is unbelievable, our mother is...
Monica: Hey, we can take her back with you if you want.
Monica: Ross!
Monica: Okay. (Chandler grabs the dish from Monica and hands it to Will who starts dishing out a large helping.)
(Monica and Ross enter.)
(Monica returns with the nurse and they go into Nana's room.)
Monica: We checked. A lot.
Monica: Dad!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is talking to her father.]
Monica: You what?
Monica: That's probably what they'll say.
Monica: They've arrested Monica.
Phoebe: Monica and Chandler said that you were having so much fun here. And apparently no amount of drums or tarantulas is gonna change that.
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Hey Phoebe. Hey, tell me what you think. All right. The house next door to the one that we're buying in Westchester? Just went on the market. I wanna take a look at it, but Chandler doesn't.
Monica: Joey, stop hitting on her! It's her wedding day!
Monica: How are you?
Fake Monica: Hey.
Monica: Are these the shoes?
Monica: It was a really beautiful service.