words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Chandler enter, the others are sitting on the couch.]
Monica: Hey guys!
Monica: We need to talk to you about something.
Ross: (skeptical) That doesn't sound like you... That's Monica talking!
Monica: No, it's not!
Monica: Thank you, Pheebs!
Monica: What? You are way off, lady!
Monica: That's my favourite kind! Okay, we are doing this!
Monica: Hey, stay out of this, Chandler! This is between me... and ME!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Rachel and Monica are in there, and Phoebe enters]
Monica: You guys, I ordered some chocolate pies from that bakery on Bleecker. Could you pick them up for me?
Monica: No, no, no, I don't make chocolate pies. When I was younger I-I enter in this pie-eating contest. I ate so many that just the thought of them made me sick.
Monica: 2 minutes, 12 pies and a part of one tin! Okay, I see you guys at 4.
Monica: This dinner is gonna be so great! In your face, last year "me"!
(Monica leaves)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Chandler is watching TV and Monica is cooking]
Monica: (Chandler's laughing) Did someone drop the baton again?
Monica: (she tastes what she has cooked) I don't get older. I just get better!
Monica: You don't know that.
Monica: Yeah, but we haven't heard a thing from the adoption agency and it has been weeks!
Monica: Name one of his books.
Monica: Ok, let's see... uhm, okay, the turkey is in the oven, the stuffing is ready...
Monica: Oh, Chandler, that's sweet. But you don't have to do everything Doctor Phil tells you to do.
Monica: Ok, let's see... Oh, the cranberry sauce, it is easy to make and no-one really cares about it.
Monica: Okay, I'm gonna go check on something across the hall. You start by washing these (she gives Chandler a bowl with cranberries. Then, while she's going outside, she sees him with a bottle of soap in his hands) Not with soap!! (she leaves)
Chandler: Look, Monica has been working hard all day, she didn't wanna host this thing in the first place, we shouldn't go!
Monica: Where is everybody? They're forty-five minutes late!
Monica: Do you hear something? (Chandlers stands up and goes to the door to look out from the peephole)
Monica: Ohhh! Let me see! Oh God, I can't believe this! They're an hour late and they're just staying out there, talking!
Monica: (gasps) Oooh! They are in for a world of pain!
Monica: Oh! They're late and they're sloppy!
Phoebe: We're just... we're trying to figure out an excuse. Hey! Ooh! How about this: We can say that Monica told us 5 o'clock, not 4 o'clock. That way we're right on time! (Others start to agree but she continues) OR... or, we can plant PCP in the apartment and call the cops on her.
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
Monica: No! Everything's cold. The turkey's dried out and the... the stuffing is all soggy.
Chandler: Yeah, and there's a bowl of cranberry sauce that... (speaking lower to Monica) what happens to cranberry sauce?
Monica: (Rolling her eyes) Nothing. It's fine.
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
Monica: That's all the turkey you're gonna get.
Rachel: (gasps) Oh, I just remembered. We do have something to eat. Monica put something in our oven this morning.
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
Monica: Hey, you touch that and you will be sorry.
Chandler: Guys, I'd listen to her. The vein is bigger than I've ever seen it. (Monica looks at Chandler)
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
(Monica looks insulted)
Monica: Stinky?!
(Joey sticks his head through the gap. Monica and Chandler are now sitting at the dinner table. There is another smaller table full of food standing in front of the front door)
(Monica and Chandler do not look amused by Joeys head in the door)
(Monica is now smiling)
Monica: Oh! Enough! A monkey could have made 'em!
Joey: (still with his door wedged in the door gap, now opens his eyes wide and stares at Monica and Chandler as he did with Ross earlier in the hall) Hey listen guys, we feel really terrible.
Joey: Come on you guys, we want you to know we're (His eye widen even more) very very sorry. (Monica and Chandler are now covering their eyes with their hands) (then to the others in the hall) Right guys?
Monica: Yeah, they do seem to feel pretty bad.
Monica: (Gets up) Okay, okay. You two (to Phoebe and Rachel) go get the dessert. And I'll let you in.
Monica: Yeah, I asked you and Phoebe to pick up the pies. You did remember, right?
Phoebe: Pies, oh, we thought you said priiiize (goes to the hall and comes back with Emma's trophy in her hand). Here! (gives it to Monica).
(Monica takes it and reads the label)
Monica: Grand Supreme Little Darling?
Monica: Oh my God! YOU FORGOT THE PIES? Well, I cannot believe this. You force me to make dinner, then you're an hour late and you forget the one little thing that I asked you to do.
Monica: It's too late for apologies.
Monica: The three of us?
(Monica gasps and holds her forehead. Phoebe, Rachel and Ross pull back their heads)
Monica: Joey, that is not gonna work.
Monica: Alright, well, this does not change anything. (to Chandler) Okay, we need to get something to grease the sides of his face.
Monica: Bring it.
(Chandler gives Monica a footlong "eye dropper" with the turkey grease in it)
Monica: Here you go!
(And he starts licking the grease which trickles down his face. Monica also squirts some on the other side of his face, and his tongue follows her movements.)
Monica: Okay, try it.
Monica: Alright, we're gonna have to unscrew the chain.
Monica: Chandler, where are your tools?
Monica: I do, but Rachel borrowed them.
Monica: Oh!
Monica: Okay, I have to get that. Now when I get back, I want you and your friends to be gone. Thanksgiving is over. The Vein has spoken.
(Monica enters from the spare bedroom.)
Chandler: (to Monica) Look! Look! Look what the... Look what... Look what the floating heads did!
Monica: (very emotional) I don't care.
(Chandler can't believe what he's hearing. He looks at Monica, then at the others, then back at Monica.)
Monica: That was the adoption agency...
Monica: WE'RE GETTING A BABY!
Monica: There's a pregnant woman in Ohio, and she picked us!
Monica: This Thanksgiving kicks last Thanksgiving's ass!
Rachel: To Monica and Chandler... and that knocked up girl in Ohio.
Monica: I can't believe they called, and we're actually getting a baby. (she kisses Chandler)
(Monica and Chandler are looking curiously at Joey.)
Monica: And Mindy, your maid of...?
Monica: Okay, so you were trying to play bad this whole time.
MONICA: I'm just easing you in.
Monica: So, uh, have you ever thought about being there for her?
(Monica rolls her eyes.)
Monica: Think about it.
Monica: (goes to Chandler) Phoebe and Rachel saw you with Nancy today and... em... they think you're having an affair.
Monica: Gosh, doesn't it seem like a million years ago?
Monica: Y'know, just be there for her.
Monica: I can't believe he did this.
Monica: I have no moves. (He moves in to kiss her and she laughs and backs away.) Okay, whatcha doin there?! (Giggles.) Oh yknow what? Im sorry, this is just too weird.
Monica: Are you freaking kidding me, Green?
Monica: Ethan, it's um... it's icky.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier.]
Monica: Hey-hey, how goes the dancing? Gay yet?
Monica: Rachel, what're you gonna say to him?
Monica: I just thought he was nice, y'know?
Monica: From here to the airport?
Monica: Okay then, I dont stink. Im a good chef. Okay. (Starts to leave.)
Ross: So, Phoebs owes $7.50, Monica, you owe $10, and Rachel, you owe fifteen big ones.
Monica: Its only been a couple of hours, so just give it some time.
Monica and Phoebe: Sure.
Monica: Then why the hell are you dumping my brother?!?
Monica: Wait a minute! Unless, we give her all gifts she can use after shes done being pregnant. Like-like umm, regular coffee, Tequila.
Monica: Is there? Is there someone else?
Monica: Why isn't it working out?
Monica: Mail call, Rachel Green, bunk seven.
Monica: Oh, from who?
MONICA: Ok. [Richard walks in] Hey, why don't you ask Richard?
Monica: Aww, the only reason you want to go out with me because my blond wig, and the big boobs, and the fact that I serve you food.
Monica: Oh, why?
Monica: (gets up) No, no, no, no, no, no pressure, no pressure!
Monica: No, you can't! Friends hooking up is a bad idea.
Monica: Okay. (They both jump up to head for there room, but Monica stops.) But wait, we cant. My Cousin Cassie is in the guest room, were supposed to have lunch.
Monica: No, its not bad. Its not bad at all. Its-its really nice.
Rachel: Monica, would you calm down? The credit card people said that you only have to pay for the stuff that you bought.
Monica: Oh, hes catching up to her!
Monica: I'm sure they'll be here soon.
Rachel: Oh uh-uh pal! Dont call me mommy! Its bad enough you call your own mother that. (He looks at Monica.)
MONICA: There's a game?
MONICA: Oh God, you are about to get sooo lucky.
Phoebe: (on phone) 'Right, well look, um, if Joey loses this audition, that is it for Estelle. I don't care! Annie you are a doll, what time can you see him?' (to Monica) I need a pen. (Chandler hands her one, but she needs something to right on, so she tilts Chandler's head over and writes on the back of his neck)
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is serving Joey, Ross, and Monica their drinks.]
Monica: Ohh come on, I love this song! Come on, youll be fine. (She starts to walk towards the floor.)
Monica: (pulling the plate back) Oh-ho! But not in here! Cant eat em in bed, remember? No crumbies!
Phoebe: Sure! (When Monica gets close to the door.) (Yelling) Yeah! Las Vegas, number one!
Monica: (to Julie) It's an expression.
Monica: Pheebes, you know what I'm thinking?
Monica: No you're not.
Monica: Why not?
Monica: No, although now that's what I'm thinking.
Monica: Sweetie, I wanted you to have him too.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning.]
Monica: So? How did it go with Joshua last night?
Monica: Yeah. But of course we had to update it a little bit. (To Ross) Hey, by the way, great thinking about catching me!
Monica: Honey, you're not pathetic, you're sad.
Monica: Rachel, how did this happen?
[Monica and Phoebe enter.]
[Cut to Chandler entering his and Monicas apartment alight with a thousand candles in The One With The Proposal.]
Monica: I promise.
Monica: What? I didn't say anything.
Monica: How who wears it?
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: I know!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Joey and Chandler are giving out their Christmas presents out of a cardboard box from a case of motor oil.]
Monica: Would you look at her? She is so peaceful.
Monica: Look , I'm sorry, guys, I just don't wanna give them any more ammunition than they already have.
Monica: Um, Pennsylvania Dutch.
Monica: First of all um, I love you both so much and youre both so important to me
Phoebe: Oh, hello, kettle? This is Monica. You're black.
MONICA: I meant, why don't you take Richard to the game? What?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are showing off Ben to the gang.]
Monica and Ross: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 (Ross runs to be caught by Monica, but she moves out of the way)
Monica: Ok, um, I'll go with you.
Monica: But I'm...
Monica: You're welcome.
Monica: (looking out the window) Look look! He's doing it again, the guy with the telescope!
Monica: This is so unfair! She's got everything I want, and she doesn't have my mother.
Monica: Hey, great skirt! Birthday present?
Monica: You had a salad.
Monica and Rachel: (Wistfully, shaking their heads) No.
Monica: The second sister dies in Archie and Jughead Double Digest?
Monica: That was gonna be my opener.
Monica: Here you go! What do you think about centerpieces?
Monica: Chandlers making his sex face.
Monica: Hi, I am Monica and this is Chandler. Please come in.
Monica: Okay.
Joey: (frustrated) Ahh! There's gotta be a way. I mean, you know, if Monica and Chandler move out here and now Phoebe is married to Mike. That just leaves me and Ross and Rach, you know what I mean?
Monica: Julie.
Monica: Hey, where is everybody?
Monica: Judy.
Monica: That is not true!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey, Monica, and Phoebe are there as Chandler enters.]
Monica: You know, Rachel, when you ran out of your wedding, I was there for you. I put a roof over your head, and if that means nothing to you... (Rachel isn't buying it, desperate) twenty dollars an hour.
Joey: Monica, I'm tellin' you, this guy is perfect for you.
Monica: It's that terrible?
Monica: Whoa! Whoa!! Tackled by a girl! Bet ya dont see that everyday, do ya?
Monica: Hey, how long are you in the city?
Monica: I feel terrible, I really do.