words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is sitting in the living room as Monica enters.]
Monica: Hey.
(Monica notices something.)
Monica: Oh my God! You cleaned! (Gasps) Look at these floors! You did the windows! Oh, I have been begging you for months and you did! You cleaned! And nagging works!
Monica: Oh no, was I cleaning in my sleep again?
Monica: Well then who?
Monica: (shocked) I hope by maid you mean mistress, because if some other woman was here cleaning then
Monica: Oh, relinquish is just a fancy word for lose!
Monica: Did she really say that?
Monica: Fine, I can do it. (Gets anxious.) Whew.
Monica: Well, usually when Im this anxious, I clean!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is observing the new maid, Brenda, clean.]
Monica: Oh well umm, I make it myself! Its two parts ammonia and one part lemon juice. And now the secret ingredient is yknow what? We just met.
Monica: (To Chandler) I love her.
Monica: Okay. (As Brenda exits Monica notices something.)
Monica: She stole my jeans!
Monica: I have been looking for them all week and she is wearing them!
Monica: Dont you see? Its the perfect crime!
Monica: I will prove it to you! Okay? About a week ago I was wearing those jeans and I dropped a pen in my lap and it left an ink stain on the crotch. Now when she comes back I will find it and show you that stain!
Monica: I guess.
Monica: Fine. Im just glad I didnt give her my secret ingredient.
Monica: Yeah! (Laughs.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Brenda is sweeping and Monica is sitting at the kitchen table.]
Monica: Nice jeans!
Monica: Oh. (Holds on to it.) (To herself) Youre not gettin it.
(Brenda bends down to use the dustpan and Monica leans over to look for the stain, but leans so far over she falls out of the chair.)
Monica: Oh, I fell asleep.
Monica: Oh, will you do the top of the cabinets? Thatll really work up your appetite for lunch.
(Brenda pulls a chair to the counter and uses it to get up on the counter in order to clean the top of the cabinets. Monica sneaks over, bends over, and tries to see the stain. That doesnt work so she sticks her head between Brendas legs. Suddenly Brenda changes her stance and traps Monicas head between her legs.)
Monica: Hello.
Monica: Im sorry. Ive never had a maid before, is this not okay?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Brenda is shaking out the rugs on the balcony as Monica pouts in the living room.]
Monica: Hey! Umm, I think Brenda needs a raise.
Monica: Because I put my head between her legs.
Monica: Theyre my pants!
Monica: No! I was just getting into position and then everything went dark.
Monica: Fine. (Brenda comes in to use the bathroom and adjusts her pink bra strap on the way.) Shes wearing my bra!
Monica: My pink flowered bra! I recognize the strap!
Monica: Heres the plan! Okay? Im going to leave you get a look at Brendas bra!
Monica: I would do it but she thinks Im attracted to her!
Monica: Did you not hear where my head was? Come on! Come on were a team! Were in this together!
Monica: Do this for me! Come on, I catch you looking at womans breasts all the time!
Monica: Do you see this? (Mimics him drooling over a womans breasts.)
Monica: Yes! Absolutely. Okay? Look, youll know its mine because on the right cup, the lacey part, theres a very noticeable rip.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Brenda is wiping the coffee table and Chandler is trying to look at her bra and leans over on the coffee table to get a good look.]
[Scene: The Hallway, Monica is sitting on the step as Rachel returns.]
Monica: (looking at Rachels jeans) Where did you get those jeans?!
Monica: No I didnt!
Monica: Oh no! Did you take my bra too?!
Monica: The pink one with the flowers?!
Rachel: You mean the one that youre wearing? (Adjusts Monicas pink bra strap as Monica looks down her shirt.)
Monica: Sounds about right.
Monica: Alright. My job here is done.
Monica: Really! That long?! (Chandler slowly turns and looks at her.) (To Chandler) Look all you want, its happening!
Monica: I know.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is playing his music. Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
Monica: Oh, yeah, that's true.
Monica: If that falls off the truck, it wouldn't be the worst thing.
Monica: Okay, please be careful with that. It was my grandmother's. Be careful.
(Monica and Chandler put Jack and Erica in their stroller.)
Monica: We got some time.
(Chandler hugs her. Monica hugs Ross and Rachel as Chandler gets the stroller with the twins.)
Monica: Oh-ho, look what I got Julio.
MONICA: Ok, the first person's most embarassing memory is, 'Monica, your party sucks.' Very funny.
Monica: And when he's naked I can throw him out in the front yard and lock the door and all the neighbors will just humiliate him!
(Monica and Chandler run back to Erica's bed.)
Monica: (laughs) I dont have anything like that, but let me go see if Rachel does.
[Cut to a hallway in the building, Monica and Phoebe are knocking on a door. Mr. Heckles emerges.]
Monica: Oh yeah, I remember mine! Ohh, it was my sixth birthday, my dad took me to the park, I got it, and it bent.
Monica: (getting up) All right, Ill go down there. But, Im not gonna serve the lasagna. Im gonna serve something I make.
(Rachel glares at the nurse, who gives Monica a form attached to a clipboard.)
[Scene: Monica's eye doctor's office, Monica and Rachel are waiting in an exam room and looking at this big white thing used to check eyes. I have no idea what it is, and if an ophthalmologist happens to know what that is, let me know.]
(Monica talks loudly in the baby's room)
Monica: I couldnt eat it! I had five friends who couldnt eat it, and one of them eats books.
Monica: Really! (They hug and kiss) All right? Let's forget about this going home stuff and celebrate our anniversary. (She picks up his suitcase.) Okay, this is empty.
Monica: That's because as far as my parents are concerned, Ross can do no wrong. Y'see, he's the Prince. Apparently they had some big ceremony before I was born.
Monica: Cause I just keeping thinking about all these things that Im not gonna have and its freaking me out. I dont know what to do about it.
Monica: So you wanna tell us now, or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's Bathroom, Chandler and Monica are sharing a candlelight bubble bath while drinking champagne and they clink their glasses.]
Monica: Okay. (They kiss.) Okay, I cant wait! This is going to be the best Valentines Day ever! (Chandler giggles and exits.) I cant believe it! Make the presents! Make the presents!
Monica: Oh, we weren't talking about you. No, no way to recover.
Monica: Oh yeah that's what you want - my inhibitions lowered.
Joey: You don't wanna see what I just saw! (at this moment Monica comes home, and sees Chandler flat on his back on the floor and Joey pinning him down)
Monica: Yeah. But a part of me also cant wait til its over. Chandler and I have this pact not to have sex again until the wedding.
Monica: About nineteen pounds.
Jeannine: (to Monica) All right, I just got changed in thirty seconds so you can be alone with him. You'd better go for it.
Monica: Maybe because you used to be aloof, or that youre really sarcastic, or that, yknow, you joke around all the time. Or that you take off your clothes and throw them on the couch.
Monica: She doesn't have a stomach-ache. She's in labor!
Monica: Honey, you can relax. Last night at work, Geoffrey told this really sexist joke. After that, not so funny anymore.
Rachel: Monica! Im not gonna screw it up!
MONICA: Tell him that you haven't seen your wife in a long time.� Tell him that having a long-distance relationship is really difficult.� Tell him that what little time we have is precious.
Phoebe: Yeah, last Saturday. Wow! She was the first black man to fly solo across the Atlantic. (Chandler and Monica look puzzled) Oh, wait a minute, I read the wrong one.
Chandler: Yeah, not bad right? You know what, Monicas gonna be working late, so I'm gonna make this place spotless. You know what else I'm gonna do, know what else I'm gonna do? I'm gonna go downstairs, I'm gonna get her some flowers. Now who wouldn't wanna live with me?
Chandler: Oh right, your allergies. (Monica leaves and to the chick and duck) All her, she hates you. (Chandler leaves without finishing the message for Joey.)
[Cut to the city street. Monica and Chandler are jogging. Chandler is lagging behind so he hops in a cab and takes off, leaving Monica behind]
Monica: (to the nurse) Hi, (tiny laugh) um, I'm gonna need a new set of (tiny laugh) these forms (tiny laugh).
[Scene: Cousin Frannies Wedding Reception, Monica and Ross are entering and finding their table.]
[Scene: At the Beach, its raining cats and dogs as the gang arrives. Chandler and Monica are taking shelter under Rachels hat.]
Monica: Oh my God! No wonder I get such great service at Cafe Maurice.
Monica: Good! Now I need you to be careful and efficient. And remember, if I am harsh with you, it is only because you are doing it wrong.
Monica: Im glad youre here, we have a couple of things to ask you about the wedding ceremony.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering carry a large box, Monica is mopping the ceiling.]
Monica: I still say that if we had called your dad we coulda gotten better seats.
Phoebe: Whats the big deal? I did it at Monica and Chandlers!
Monica: Ugh! Well, yknow, we were away
Chandler: Now, there is a dress laid out on your bed. (Monica stumbles on the steps.) Okay, (catches her) youre doing great. Youre doing great. Youre doing fine.
Chandler: You are an amazing wife. (Monica shrugs) No really you're amazing you were actually gonna do this for me, I mean where do you find the strength and understanding over something like that.
Monica: Okay, so it doesnt involve Ross or Rachel or Chandler or Joey. But, what about Pete?
Monica: Okay. (Climbs back on his back.) All right.
[Fun Bobby leaves and Monica goes back inside.]
Monica: Oh honey, were close now but you-you wouldnt believe the years of-of nugies, and wedgies, and flying wedgies, and atomic wedgies, and....(Phoebe shakes her head like she doesnt understand) Thats where the waistband actually goes over your head.
MONICA: Cache? Jaunty?
Monica: No! Everything's cold. The turkey's dried out and the... the stuffing is all soggy.
Monica: Hi, sorry. I almost didnt hear you, because yknow Im just so in love with my new husband. Were on our honeymoon.
[Scene: The restaurant. Chandler and Monica are sitting at a table]
Monica: Chandler is supposed to find out if he's getting an assistent job at his ad agency. But out of the 15 interns, they are only hiring three.
Monica: (to Phoebe) I swear I've seen birds do this on Wild Kingdom.
Mrs. Geller: (entering) (to Monica) Honey, dont bite your nails.
[Flashback to 702 - TOW Rachel's Book] [Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is looking at the wedding book as Monica enters.]
Chandler: (to Monica) Look! Look! Look what the... Look what... Look what the floating heads did!
Monica: Wow! Look at this! (Picking up a shirt.) I cant believe I even fit into this shirt! (She holds it up and it reads: Tyrannosaurus Ross.) (She turns it around and looks at it.) Oh, this is yours. (Hands it to Ross.)
Monica: Hi, come in! Paul, this is.. (They are all lined up next to the door.)... everybody, everybody, this is Paul.
Monica: Yeah, you really shouldn't. (to Ross, sarcastically) By the way, how was that year-long dig in Cairo?
Chandler: Now, Monica, you know that's not how you look for an engagement ring in a lasagne...
Monica: Well, if you think about it, I am kind of like a Reverend. I mean, as a chef, I serve God, by feeing the hungry and poor. (looks very convinced about what she just said)
Rachel and Monica: Oh god, waddawe do, waddawe do, waddawe do?
Ross: (to the class) Right! So when Rigby got his samples back from the laboratory he made a startling discovery! What he believed to be igneous, was in fact sedimentary. Imagine his consternation when(sees Monica and Rachel.) Oh bloody hell.
Chandler: Oh, okay, thanks. (He goes back to the couch and rejoins Monica, Joey, and Phoebe.)
(Monica opens the door for Dr. Mitchell and Dr. Geoffrey.)
Monica: Oh sweetie, you can never embarrass me. (Chandler grunts.) Okay, you can easily embarrass me. But come on, it doesnt matter. All right? I married you! So I want to dance on my wedding night with my husband. Come on. (They go onto the floor.) Just try not to move your feet at all. (Chandler starts to get into the groove and bust a move.) There you go.
Chandler: It was pretty simple actually, I came up with a couple of cost-cutting solutions, wrote out a list and Monica told me to go to hell.
Monica: I mean I-I don't I think I have enough quarters.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Ross, and Monica are still playing catch, with Chandler looking on. Joey throws the ball to Monica who catches it and whips it at Ross.]
Phoebe: Ugh! I dont know Monica. It feels funny just being here. I mean if you buy a bed from Janices ex-husband, thats like betraying Chandler.
Monica: Chandler, relax its not a contest. (To Rachel) Certainly not a close one.
Monica: Congratulations! Wow! I cant believe youre nominated for an Emmy!
The Saleslady: Yes! I have it right here. (Phoebe and Monica both gasp at the dress.) Would you like to try it on Ms. Waltham?
Monica: But the minute we start to lie to each other (Pauses after she realizes what she's saying.) And by 'we' I mean society.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's Apartment, everyone except Chandler is there; they're opening their presents]
[Scene: The guest bedroom. Rachel and Monica are talking to each other.]
Monica: Were going to Las Vegas to see your dad. Its time you two talked, and I want to get to know my father-in-law.
Monica: See what happens when you give people advice? I hope you told him not to?
Monica: Son of a gun, it is!
Monica: Oh, wow, can you believe you're like three weeks away?
Monica: Oh, you two must have been so cute running around on a barge.
Monica: (to Chandler) Is he gonna introduce us?
Monica: When girls hang out, we dont have pillow fights in our underwear. (Chandler gets a hurt look on his face.) Im sorry. We do. We do. I dont know why I said that.
Chandler: That's great. (To Monica.) Can I see the book?
Monica: How ya feelin?
Monica: Alright, we're gonna have to unscrew the chain.
Monica: Ah, thank you. This building does have a wholesome family feel to it.
Monica: You made pancakes?