words in movies
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, Monica is cooking as a waitress enters carrying a plate of food that has been sent back.]
Monica: She sent the chicken back again?!
Monica: Well fine! I want to meet this chicken expert! Send the Colonel in!
(The waitress lets her in as Monica is about to throw a lobster into a pot of boiling water (Although, she hasnt taken off the rubber bands that hold the claws, so she cant be that good of a chef). Anyway, guess who the Colonel is by the following phrase.)
Monica: (to the lobster) Lucky bastard! (Throws the lobster in and turns around to face the planets most annoying woman, next to Dr. Laura and Kathy Lee Gifford of course. Shes the most annoying female TV character however.) Janice.
Monica: Im fine.
Janice: (notices Monicas engagement ring) Ohh! What is that on your finger?! Im blind!
Monica: Oh Uh
[Cut to Monica and Chandlers just after Monica has finished telling Chandler what happened.]
Monica: Well, she saw the ring.
Monica: Well, she was shocked when I told her, but then again so were most people.
Monica: Well, she actually has a boyfriend yknow herself, named Clark. Uh, she also kinda invited herself to our wedding. Clark too.
Monica: Huh?
Monica: Well, she corned me! She asked if the wedding was in town! I mean, what was I supposed to do?!
Monica: Come on! So she comes to the wedding! I mean it wont be so bad.
Monica: Oh my God, shes not gonna like the chicken that night either is she?!
Monica: Really?
Monica: So-so you wouldve just lied?
Monica: Would it really have been that easy?
Monica: Good, so do it Saturday night because were going to dinner with her and Clark.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Chandler are on their date with Janice and Clark, however Clark is a no show and Janice is crying the Mississippi River about it.]
Monica: He might still show up.
Monica: Is that all?
Monica: Its actually going to be just family.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table and are still trying to decide what to do about Janice.]
Monica: What are we gonna do?
Chandler: (To Monica) Did she see us yet? Did she see us?
Monica: Janice, what umm, what are you doing here?
Monica: (To Chandler) Our kids are gonna call her Aunt Janice arent they?
Monica: Yeah, in-in-in the bathroom.
Monica: Well just well just let her stay.
Monica: Kinda like your Barca lounger.
Monica: I never stop thinking about it.
Chandler: Honestly? Our apartment is a hotbed for electromagnetic activity. Now Monica and I have been immunized, but sadly you have not.
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God! You have to go!
Monica: Because Chandler still has feelings for you!
Monica: Thats right. Thats right. And that is why you cant stay here tonight. And probably why you shouldnt come to the wedding.
Monica: I mean, I realize that his feelings may never completely go away, but you can.
Janice: Oh my Gawd, I-I understand. I-I am so sorry, Ill go. (Starts for the door.) Good-bye Monica (hugs her), I wish you a lifetime of happiness with him. Chandler, (hugs him) you call me when this goes in the pooper. (Hurries out.)
Chandler: I just wanted to show Monica your book. (Ross just glares at him.)
Monica: Nothing. Just something I want to get Phoebes opinion on for Valentines Day.
Monica: I love you. (They kiss.)
Monica: Uh-hmm.
Monica: "Wendy" is a fat girl name.
Monica: What are you doing here?
Chandler: Monica.
Monica: What?
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah, I know... (mirroring her friend) ..I'm I'm just not that bright either.
Monica: Oh my god!
Monica: But I thought if you left, you get fired.
Monica: No, I think that this is what you wanna do, I think it's great!
Monica: Okay, while were waiting for these pills to kick in, Im gonna sit you down on the couch. Come on. (Phoebe gets up and goes with her.) Get some nice soft pillows under your head, Im gonna turn the TV on and you can watch whatever you want. And ImSit down(She sits down on the couch)gonna make you some tea. And then, Im gonna rub your feet.
(Chandler hands Phoebe an envelope, and some more to Monica)
Chandler: (to Monica) Here, pass these, will ya.. (points to the others)
Monica: Yes smokie, that is what it was. I just can�t get enough.
Monica: Hey-hey-hey. You wanna hear something that sucks.
Monica: Chandler, please dont think I was trying to pressure you. Phoebe and Rachel
Monica: Oh, and by the way, hes lost a bunch of weight. I mean he looks goo-ood! Okay, I mean really, really gorgeous! (Joey clears his throat.) I still love Chandler.
Monica: Ross used to stay up every Saturday night to watch Golden Girls!
Monica: (grabbing a bag of Nestle Tollhouse chocolate chips) Phoebe, is this the recipe? (Tosses her the bag.)
Monica: Yeah! Okay, this one is a mushroom cap. (Points to it.) Umm, this one is made of bologna. (Points.)
Monica: Hey Rach, could you get me some cough drops?
Monica: Would you stop staring at her?
Monica: Oh because it doesnt really fit. Oh by the way, I-I booked the Swing Kings.
Monica: So you're gonna be gone four days a week? (Thinks about it.) No.
Monica: (to Chandler) Take me home! (they quickly leave)
MONICA: Well, maybe the mailman liked the cookies, we just didn't give him enough.
Monica: Hey Rach!
(door knock, Monica enters)
Monica: Ready for your birthday lunch?
Monica: Right there! That was so fake!
Monica: You were just being so nice to him!
A Waiter in Drag: (to Chandler and Monica) Has someone taken your order yet?
Monica: Does he?
Monica: Oh, you're welcome for the party. I'm glad you're having a good time.
Monica: Hey Rach, somebody got you shoes!
Monica: So this is what a stroke feels like.
Chandler: Oh no-no-no, Monica would freak. (Doug looks at him.) But to hell with that bitch.
[Scene: A Mexican Restaurant, Monica, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler and his mom are there.]
Monica: Okay. Wait, just give me a second, I need to just get my boots off first. (She starts taking them off.) Ah Ooh Oohh Ohh Oh God Ohh Oh Ohh Ohhhh
Monica: Hey!
(Monica goes back inside)
Monica: (from inside) Again, you're welcome.
Monica: No way! You had your party, now I have mine! Is everything alright?
Rachel: Well Monica seems to think it's because you have feelings for me.
913 - The One Where Monica Sings
Joey: Chandler? Forty-five minutes? Well, something is not right. I just can’t believe he would do this to Monica!
Monica: Im just saying, if we put just a little bit of makeup on you.
Monica: Alright, you know, we got it, we got it. Let's play for real. High stakes... big bucks...
Monica: It's just, I'm not good at singing.
Monica: I'm there!
Monica: Only if I don't have to get up and sing.
MONICA: No no, the father can, but um, since I am the roommate I can tell you that she's not here and I'll pass along the message, ok. So bye-bye.
Monica: No no, it's not working on me. Wow! I must be growing up!
Monica: You kissed him?
Monica: I thought you hated him?
Monica: Oh yeah...So how did you end up kissing?
Monica: So are you thinking of starting up something with this guy?
Monica: Okay, listen, there's still some of Chandler's medicine under the sink in the bathroom. Bye!
Monica: Daddy! I dont think we need to hear about the specific positions you and mom had sex.
Monica: (entering, in a hurry) Guys! Guys! I just saw two people having sex in a car right outside.
Monica: Yeah, let-let-lets pretend thats not true.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are there as Phoebe enters.]
Monica: (looks at it more closely) Oh that's an eye removal machine.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel is entering, still pregnant.]
Monica: Wow! You are really fast!
Monica: What?
Monica: No I told you I can't.
Monica: Okay. (As Brenda exits Monica notices something.)
Monica: Im just so excited to make the presents! (Chandler does another sarcastic/scared laugh and leaves.) Shoot!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is watching Joey pace nervously as Rachel enters.]
Monica: What have you heard me sing?
(Monica and Ben sit down on the couch.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is making a drink as Phoebe enters with the fur coat.]
Monica: Wait wait! I can't sing in front of all these people.
Monica: Yeah, but I love you more. Besides yknow, nothing goes with Bing. So Im screwed. I mean (Rachel hands Emma to Monica.) Oh, hi Emma. Yeah, thats you. Youre our little Em. Oh whats that honey? What? Oh, you want a little cousin? (To Chandler) You want a cousin right now?!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's]
Monica: "To take you to his mansion in the sky-y?"
Monica: Oh, I still cant believe my dad saw us having sex! He didnt make it to one of piano recitals, but this he sees!
Ross: No, its not just cause Im jealous. (Both Monica and Chandler give him a Come on look) I mean Im not, Im not, Im not jealous, okay? Its Look, the guy, he screamed, he actually screamed at this couple sitting in our seats.
Monica: Mom�s here? I wanted to have lunch with her today, she told me she was out of town.
MONICA: (smiling) I arranged some pillows on the bed to look like a guy.
Monica: What Phoebe meant to say was umm, how come youre having a party and were not invited?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's]
Monica: All right, watch!
Monica: And they love me!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, time has lapsed, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table.]
Monica: If you're not going then I don't want to go either.
Ross: Hey, hello! mmwa! (kisses Carol) I brought all the books, and Monica sends her love, along with this lasagna.
Monica: What are you doing?! Chandler! You cant just go back a phase!
<Amy pushes Rachel and Monica goes berserk and runs around the table>
Monica: Ok, right about now the turkey should be crispy on the outside, juicy on the inside. Why are we standing here?
Monica: He's not great umm, but he's dealing with it. Oh wait a minute, you're not gonna try
Monica: I don't care. <pauses and realizes...> Oh my god. I've lost the will to scold.
(Monica enters and Chandler screams stuff at the TV.)
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Oh my god.
Monica: Oh, it's perfect.
Monica: Sure, we'll do that. What are you up to?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, later that night, there is someone knocking on the door and Chandler stumbles out into the living room, turns on the light, looks through the peephole, and opens the door.]