words in movies
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, everyone is there and they are finishing watching the first episode of Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. Joey is of course Mac.]
Mac: (on TV) Well, if we learned one thing today C.H.E.E.S.E. is that cheerleaders and high explosives dont mix. (Cut to Joey laughing while Rachel, Chandler, and Monica arent amused.)
(They all make happy faces as they are unable to express their feelings verbally. Finally, the phone rings and the race to answer it is won by Monica.)
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Hold on please. Joey, its your mom. (Hands him the phone.)
Monica: Wh-what are we gonna tell him?
Monica: And I have costumes.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Monica are reading on the couch.]
Monica: Phoebe, do you think that your favorite animal says much about you?
Monica and Phoebe: Oh, thats great!!
Rachel: Yeah! Guess who walks into my office is the end of my story. (To Monica and Phoebe) It was Ralph Lauren! (Monica and Phoebe gasp) Ralph Lauren walked into my office!
Monica: Still get a discount on wedding dresses?
Monica: Im so happy for you!
Monica: What?!
Monica: Oooh!
Monica and Phoebe: Ahhh!!
Chandler: No-no-no-no. (Waves him away as Monica and Phoebe enter whispering to each other.) Hey! (Monica shushes him.)
Phoebe: (To Monica) Anyway, I should go. Okay, bye.
Monica: (To Chandler) Hey sweetie.
Monica: I cant tell you. Its a secret.
Monica: Awww. (Kisses him.) But still no.
Monica: Really? Okay, so why dont you tell me what happened to Ross Junior year at Disneyland?
Monica: If you tell me, Ill tell you what Phoebe said.
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Oh my God. He threw up?
Chandler: No, he visited a little town south of throw up. (Monica laughs hysterically.) So what was Phoebes secret?
Monica: Oh, Nancy Thompson from Phoebes old massage place is getting fired.
Monica: Thats right! You lose sucker!! (Pause) Please still marry me.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler, Rachel, and Phoebe are there.]
Chandler: Let me see this guy. (Phoebe hands him the picture.) W-H-Wow! Dont show this to Monica! And dont tell her about the W-H-Wow!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is setting the table for dinner as Chandler enters.]
Monica: Hey! Good, youre home!
Monica: Hey baby. (Kisses him.)
Monica: I made you a surprise.
Monica: Yeah, tacos! Ever since you told me that story Ive had such a craving for them.
Monica: Ross!
Monica: No! No. Theyre umm Theyre just uh ground beef smileys. (Holding up one of the shells.)
Monica: Excuse me Mr. Mexico.
Ross: Eh, either way Ill pass. (Quietly to Chandler) I still cant eat those. (Monica is getting something out of the fridge and starts laughing.) Whats so funny?!
Monica: (trying not to laugh) Im not laughing.
Chandler: Nancy Thompsons getting fired! (Monica slaps him on the shoulder.)
Ross: (To Monica) Look, okay-okay I had food poisoning! Its not like I choose to do it! Its not likeIts not like I said, "Umm, what would make this ride more fun?!"
Monica: Youre right. I mean Im sorry. Yeah, I shouldnt be laughing. I should be laying down papers for you! (Runs off laughing which gets Chandler laughing.)
Ross: Oh really? Well I-I guess Monica should know about Atlantic City.
Monica: (running up to Ross) What happened in Atlantic City?!
Monica: (To Chandler) You kissed a guy?!! Oh my God.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler, Monica, and Ross are still giving away all of their secrets.]
Monica: Oh my God! (Laughing)
Monica: I-I already told him everything! (Threateningly) You shush!!
Ross: Once Monica was sent to her room without dinner, so she ate the macaroni off a jewelry box shed made.
Monica: Ross used to stay up every Saturday night to watch Golden Girls!
Ross: Monica couldnt tell time til she was 13!
Monica: Its hard for some people!
Chandler: (To Monica) Of course it is. (Mouths to Ross) Wowwhoa!
Monica: Chandler one time wore my underwear to work!
Monica: Ohh, Im sorry I couldnt think of anymore for Ross!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, and Ross are sitting there and not talking to each other.]
Monica: Yknow, in my defense, umm there was no glitter on the macaroni and very little glue.
Chandler: (To Monica) You have no trouble telling time now right?
Monica: No!
Monica: I dont know! Time to kiss a guy maybe?! (Ross laughs.) What are you laughing at Pampers? (He stops laughing and glares at her.)
Monica: Yeah?
Monica: Ohh, absolutely.
Monica: Yeah, definitely!
Monica: Then, Id steer clear of Phoebe.
Ross: Man! (Monica mouths, "Im sorry.")
Joey: Chandler? Forty-five minutes? Well, something is not right. I just can’t believe he would do this to Monica!
Monica: Im just saying, if we put just a little bit of makeup on you.
Monica: Alright, you know, we got it, we got it. Let's play for real. High stakes... big bucks...
Monica: It's just, I'm not good at singing.
Monica: I'm there!
Monica: Only if I don't have to get up and sing.
MONICA: No no, the father can, but um, since I am the roommate I can tell you that she's not here and I'll pass along the message, ok. So bye-bye.
Monica: No no, it's not working on me. Wow! I must be growing up!
Monica: You kissed him?
Monica: I thought you hated him?
Monica: Oh yeah...So how did you end up kissing?
Monica: So are you thinking of starting up something with this guy?
Monica: Okay, listen, there's still some of Chandler's medicine under the sink in the bathroom. Bye!
Monica: Daddy! I dont think we need to hear about the specific positions you and mom had sex.
Monica: (entering, in a hurry) Guys! Guys! I just saw two people having sex in a car right outside.
Monica: Yeah, let-let-lets pretend thats not true.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are there as Phoebe enters.]
Monica: (looks at it more closely) Oh that's an eye removal machine.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel is entering, still pregnant.]
Monica: Wow! You are really fast!
Monica: What?
Monica: No I told you I can't.
Monica: Okay. (As Brenda exits Monica notices something.)
Monica: Im just so excited to make the presents! (Chandler does another sarcastic/scared laugh and leaves.) Shoot!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is watching Joey pace nervously as Rachel enters.]
Monica: What have you heard me sing?
(Monica and Ben sit down on the couch.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is making a drink as Phoebe enters with the fur coat.]
Monica: Wait wait! I can't sing in front of all these people.
Monica: Yeah, but I love you more. Besides yknow, nothing goes with Bing. So Im screwed. I mean (Rachel hands Emma to Monica.) Oh, hi Emma. Yeah, thats you. Youre our little Em. Oh whats that honey? What? Oh, you want a little cousin? (To Chandler) You want a cousin right now?!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's]
Monica: "To take you to his mansion in the sky-y?"
Monica: Oh, I still cant believe my dad saw us having sex! He didnt make it to one of piano recitals, but this he sees!
Ross: No, its not just cause Im jealous. (Both Monica and Chandler give him a Come on look) I mean Im not, Im not, Im not jealous, okay? Its Look, the guy, he screamed, he actually screamed at this couple sitting in our seats.
Monica: Mom�s here? I wanted to have lunch with her today, she told me she was out of town.
MONICA: (smiling) I arranged some pillows on the bed to look like a guy.
Monica: What Phoebe meant to say was umm, how come youre having a party and were not invited?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's]
Monica: All right, watch!
Monica: And they love me!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, time has lapsed, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table.]
Monica: If you're not going then I don't want to go either.
Ross: Hey, hello! mmwa! (kisses Carol) I brought all the books, and Monica sends her love, along with this lasagna.
Monica: What are you doing?! Chandler! You cant just go back a phase!
<Amy pushes Rachel and Monica goes berserk and runs around the table>
Monica: Ok, right about now the turkey should be crispy on the outside, juicy on the inside. Why are we standing here?
Monica: He's not great umm, but he's dealing with it. Oh wait a minute, you're not gonna try
Monica: I don't care. <pauses and realizes...> Oh my god. I've lost the will to scold.
(Monica enters and Chandler screams stuff at the TV.)
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Oh my god.
Monica: Oh, it's perfect.
Monica: Sure, we'll do that. What are you up to?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, later that night, there is someone knocking on the door and Chandler stumbles out into the living room, turns on the light, looks through the peephole, and opens the door.]
Monica: I thought I lost it. I got a new one, like, a month ago.
Monica: No, it's not.
Monica: Yeah.
(Monica looks at him.)
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Chandler!
Monica: So, let's do this.
Monica: We're okay. I'm still ovulating.
Monica: Canoodling?
Monica: I guess you're right.
[Scene: The Airport, Chandler and Monica are following the previous couple through a tiny hallway that proves this is a set on a sound stage and not an actual airport, and see them enter the first class lounge.]
Joey: So what's it gonna be? (Monica whispers in Joey's ear. Ross gets up and waves arms frantically in protest)
Monica: What are you doing?
Monica: She's asleep.
Monica: She's asleep. Chandler?
Monica (laughs): Okay, I'll try.
Monica: Ross is really strong! Okay, hes the strongest out of all three of you! (Joey looks at her.) Except for Joey.
Monica: Two guys in one night? Wow, I thought she became a slut after she got her nose fixed.
Monica: Yes, but we have to be fast.
Rachel: Oh God Monica hi! Thank God! I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!
Monica: (Doesn't believe what she's hearing) Was your cabin pressurised?
Monica: Oh, I wish I didn't have to wait to take a pregnancy test.
Monica: Well, that was weird. You were loud, and I was fast.
Monica: Well, I'm sorry, but Chandler and I could really use a weekend away. You know, to reconnect... emotionally.
Monica: Oh my god, where's Emma? Where's Emma?
Monica: Oh my god, then...
Rachel: Of course I packed! Monica relax! I just wanted to ask Phoebe her opinion on what I should wear tonight.
Monica (on phone): Hey, Rach, how's it going?
Monica: Hey, did you stop by here?
Monica: No, we weren't!
(Monica hangs up, and Rachel looks at her phone.)
Monica (to Joey): Why the hell did you take her?
Monica: Oh, thank god! Emma, there you are!
Monica: Unless what?
Chandler: Well... there's surrogacy, but Monica has dreamt her whole life of carrying a child, she has felt that watching a surrogate would be... too hard for her.
Ross: Hows Monica coming along with her vows?
MONICA: Yes, because all good plans start with, "I'll go down the fire escape."
Phoebe: (walking up) Whats up? (Rachel hands her the note and she reads it.) Tell Monica Im sorry. (Pause) Tell her yourself!
Monica: Oh, then bring it on! Oh, unless of course your afraid you might lose to a bunch of girls.
Monica: You say Thank you very much, and then you buy me something pretty. Come on, were gonna put are hands in this bowl, and were gonna start squishing the tomatoes.
Joey: Youre right. Youre right. I-Ill go tell her now before Ross finds out and Ill be gentle. I can do that. I am a gentle person. Oh, by the way. Two people screwing in there (Points to the closet Chandler and Monica were in) if you want to check that out.
Monica: Why not?
Monica: Wow! I Had no idea you had this much pride.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Chandler, and Monica are there as Joey enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is lying in front of the bay window, and the phone rings.]
Monica: Listen...I need to know that what I'm about to ask you, will never get back to Chandler.