words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are entering]
Monica: Hey, look at me. I'm making jam, been at it since 4 o'clock this morning.
Monica: Went down to the docks. Bet ya didn't know you could get it wholesale.
Monica: I'm going into business people. I'm sick and tired of being depressed about Richard. I needed a plan, a plan to get over my man. What's the opposite of man? Jam. (sees Joey trying some jam from the pot) Oh Joey don't! It's way to hot. (Joey realizes this and spits what he had in his mouth back into the pot.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are entering]
Rachel: (reading) 'Gone for more jars. Back later. Monica Geller.'
Monica: (entering) Hey guys.
Monica: Joey, this is for you. (gives him a jar of jam) It's blackberry curin.
Monica: Joey, take your time with that. That's my last batch.
Monica: I figured out I need to charge seventeen bucks a jar just to break even. So, I've got a new plan now. Babies.
Monica: I'm talking about me having a baby.
Monica: Yeah. The great thing about the jam plan was, I was taking control of my life. So I asked myself, what is the most important thing to me in the world and that's when I came up with the baby plan.
Monica: It took me 28 years to find one man that I wanna spend my life with, if I have to wait another 28 years then, I'll be 56 before I can have a baby, and that's just stupid.
Monica: I don't need an actual man, just a couple of his best swimmers. And there, there are places you can go to get that stuff.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is eating jam straight out of the jar, and Chandler is staring at him in amazement. Joey offers him some.]
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) Okay, sperm donor number 03815, come on down! Okay, he's 6'2", 170 pounds, and he describes himself as a male Geena Davis.
Monica: You're gonna what?
Monica: What?! Why? Why is this crazy? So this isn't the ideal way to something....
Monica: Lips moving, still talking. I mean it may not be ideal, but I'm so ready. No, I-I-I see the way Ben looks at you. It makes me ache, you know?
Monica: Okay, all right, how's this? 27. Italian-American guy. He's an actor, born in Queens. Wow, big family, seven sisters, and he's the only....boy. (they all turn and look at Joey) Oh my God, under personal comments: 'New York Knicks, rule!'
Monica: Joey, this is you!
Monica: Well, honey, it is pretty competitive. I mean I've got an actual rocket scientist here.
Monica: I think, that if you really like this guy, you should just trust him.
Phoebe: Thank you, Monica.
Monica: Oh, that's what I would do, forget mine.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering]
Monica: Hey.
Monica: To the bank.
Monica: Sperm.
Monica: Oh yeah, picked a guy, 37135.
Monica: 'Fraid so. Brown hair, green eyes...
Monica: What?
Monica: Really? Why?
Monica: Hoyt?
Monica: Really, is he a swimmer?
Monica: I like that. (Joey starts laughing) What?
Monica: We do not have one of those signs.
Monica: Two girls and a boy?
Monica: And, and, and they wear those little water wings, you know. And they're, they're running around on the deck. Then Hoyt wraps this big towel around all three of them.
Joey: Sure! (Monica gets very depressed) But hey, you know this way sounds good too.
Monica: Yeah.
Joey: Oh Monica. (goes over and hugs her, then looks at the form and stops hugging her.) Wow, this guy's an astronaut. That would've been cool, (sees Monica) for like a day. (hugs her again).
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is finishing off the last of the jam]
Monica: No, sorry sweety..
Monica: No, sorry.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are there.]
Monica: Ross, cough drops, please?
Monica: What? So you guys don't mind going out with someone else who's going out with someone else?
Monica: Okay, I have to get that. Now when I get back, I want you and your friends to be gone. Thanksgiving is over. The Vein has spoken.
Monica: Yeah! But, he can't not exactly see Emily, I mean that's his wife.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there. Chandler enters.]
(Monica is drinking from the tap)
Monica: (entering) Phoebe? (Phoebe comes back into the living room) Oh, Phoebe, I'm so sorry. Have you been here long?
Joey: Please dont kick Monica and Rachel out, this wasnt there fault, it was mine.
Monica: Well, you're not working either.
Monica: I don't know.
Monica: Yeah, that'd be great! Thank you!
Chip: Amy Welch? Wow! I havent seen her since... So, Monica about ready?
[Monica enters]
Monica: Hey!
[Scene: The ladies' bathroom at the restaurant, Monica and Angela are talking.]
Monica: Okay.
Monica: No, that's not mine.
Monica: No. I hate this part.
Monica: Hey, don't say that! You got just as good a chance as anybody else of getting that job!
Monica: Um, and, well there's the.. the the small matter of...
Chandler, Monica, and Joey: Hey!!
Joey: I got it from Monica. She sold it to me for a very reasonable price.
(Monica takes of her walkman)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Brenda is sweeping and Monica is sitting at the kitchen table.]
Monica: Phoebe, she sounded pretty upset to me.
Monica: What?
Ross: Monica, come on now. Let's go, baby coming.
Monica: Okay. So what do you.... you think she's faking?
Monica: Deal!
Monica: Doing great, the quiches are coming along.
Monica: Rachel, I have not missed one question the whole game. I own this game! Look at my hand. (Holds up her hand.)
Monica: What one? You wanted him to invite you to the party and he did it!
Monica: I'm gonna leave some cards here. Please think of us for you next event.
Monica: You know everything!! Oh wait, double or nothing. I bet you the baby is over seven pounds. (Phoebe isnt interested.) I bet you it has hair. (Shes still not interested.) I bet you its a girl.
Monica: Can you go any faster with that?
MONICA: Woo-hoo, stuud!
Monica: Well, what do you think of Mike and Chandler being in a car accident?
Monica: It's so good, isn't it?
Monica: Oh, that's great! Congratulations!
Monica: Um, okay, here it goes. I'm not 22. I'm, I'm 25... and thirteen months.
Joey: Oh, man, she loved it! She's over there showing Monica and Rachel right now.
Monica: Sixty guests.
Monica: I was trying to help out a squirrel.
Monica: No?
Phoebe: And... moment's over! (Rachel, Joey and Chandler all turn and look disapprovingly towards Monica but she just shrugs it off) So, ok, uh, I can forget that. I can forget that and uhm... (she's flipping cards skipping half of them) Oh this is funny! Oh, but you need to know that to... that, to... Oh, ok, well, uhm, I (Monica is miming CUT). Ok, ok, I, ok, I.... MONICA I CAN'T DO IT LIKE THIS! THIS IS MY WEDDING! OKAY, I DON'T WANT THIS (she mimes Monica's when she was twirling her hands) OR THIS (she taps her watch) OR THIS (she mimes CUT) OK? I JUST WANTED A SIMPLE WEDDING! WHERE MY FIANCEE CAN GO TO THE BATHROOM ANYTIME HE WANTS! (pause) You know what? You're done.
Monica: Hi. Uh, you... you don't know me, I'm Monica Geller... Ross's sister.
Monica: No! Steady as a rock! Now, are you with me.
Monica: Oh, I know, I never wear fake ones. I just did it so my Mom wouldnt give me grief about me biting them.
Monica: Ours is so much better! This living room is smaller, the dining room looks like a cave! What a hole!
Monica and Ross: Scuse us
Monica: What the hell is this? (holding up the check)
Monica: Oh man! I did it again!
Monica: Yeah!
(She throws the paper at him, misses and hits Monicas door, they all jump back at the sound.)
Monica: Of course not. I mean gosh, Chandler what you did, it's, it's a wonderful thing and I really appreciate it. I know I have this weird thing where I want everything to be in the perfect place, but I'd never expect you to worry about that.
Monica: Come on!
Monica: Jeffery.
Ross: Oh, is it? Is it? Look, when Monica and I were kids, we had a dog named Rover. And, uh, one day, my dad decides, he doesn't like dogs. So Monica and her friend Phyllis take away the dog. And that was the last time we ever saw him. Don't you see? This is just like that. Only with a few details changed.
[Monica enters carrying food that's been delivered]
Rachel: (to Monica and Phoebe) Oh my God, you guys, what am I doing? What am I doing? This is so un-me!
Joey: Hey-hey dancer girl! Can I go to the bathroom? I just.. (The girl starts dancing really close to him, so he picks her up, twirls her round, and puts her against a platform) Here we go. (He walks away to find Monica and Ross doing a really out of place dance) Looking good Gellers!
MONICA: I'm at work, ordinary day, you know, chop chop chop, sauti, sauti, sauti. All of a sudden, Leon, the manager, calls me into his office. It turns out they fired the head lunch chef, and guess who got the job.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is trying to take some aspirin.]
Monica: Phoebe, Ross sucks!
Monica: Oh, what a great argument, exhaling! All right, y'know what, Ill prove it to you, okay. Ill trade you Joey for Rachel, and Ill still win the game.
Phoebe: Well alright, looks like you guys have got it under control so Im just gonna go. (She gets up and Rachel looks at her, upset, and Monica just stares.) No! Really? Misery really does love company. All right! (She sits back down.)
Monica: Okay. Umm, Phoebe, you suck too.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Hey, arent you up next?
(Rachel and Monica look at each other, and agree on something without saying anything.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, The entire gang is there.]
Monica: Are you serious?
Monica: I remember you did.
Ross: Correct. In what part of her body did Monica get a pencil stuck at age 14?
Monica: (removing ear plugs) What?
Monica: All right, eight we get married, but 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 9, 10, 11, 12 we dont get married.
Monica: Oh really, so that hysterical phone call I got from a woman at sobbing 3:00 A.M., "I'll never have grandchildren, I'll never have grandchildren." was what? A wrong number?
Monica: All right, big brother. (holds up two erm revealing articles of clothing) Which of these do you think would make your little sister look hotter, so your best friend would want to do her?
Pete: Yeah. Monica, I want you there in the front row when I win. I want you close enough to smell the blood. What do you think?
Monica: (joining him and taking the taco shells) You know that? You don't want to spoil your appetite.
Monica: Yes!!
Monica: Bye! (to Chandler) Ten bucks says, I never see that woman again in my life.
Monica: Hes not boring! Hes just-hes just low key.
Chandler: Okay. (to Monica) Its a racecar.
Monica: Oh my God! You still have the Chipper!
Monica: Hey, how did it go with Mike, is he gonna let you keep the painting?
[Cut to Monica and Rachels apartment as Rachel returns in tears.]
Monica: I hadn't! Photo 152 was a prototype.
Monica: We havent eaten yet!
(Monica looks at Rachel, who gives her the thumbs up.)
[Scene: The Gellers Kitchen, Monica and Phoebe are still cooking.]
Monica: You look great too.
Monica: So how does it look?
MONICA: Then I won't have to kill you.
Monica: No way!
Monica: (disappointed) Oh.
Monica: (happy) Oh.
Monica: I know.