words in movies
[Scene: The Hallway, Phoebe walks up to and knocks on Chandler and Monicas door.]
Monica: (opens the door wearing a robe, but leaves the chain on) Hey, whats up?
Monica: Oh, okay. No problem.
Phoebe: Okay. (Monica closes the door, gets the guitar, and then hands it out.)
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Here you go.
Monica: Okay.
Phoebe: Great! Umm (Monica closes the door again and Phoebe knocks again.)
Monica: What?!
Monica: Phoebe! You kinda caught me at a bad time.
Monica: Yes! Exactly.
Monica: (laughs) No. (Closes the door as Chandler walks up.)
(Chandler lets her into the apartment and reveals that Monica is getting a massage from another woman.)
Monica: Phoebe, I can explain!
Monica: Well umm, Alexandra has been
Monica: Phoebe, dont get upset!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica has opened another wedding present as Chandler enters.]
Monica: Hi honey. We just got a wedding gift from Bob and Faye Bing; they dont like us do they? (They gave them a pok-a-dotted punch bowl.)
Monica: No, it doesnt say where it came from. Where would we return it?
Monica: Why dont we just find a place for it?
Monica: No! Thats where we keep the canned goods! Have you completely forgotten everything you learned at orientation?
Monica: Oh, okay. Here, why dont you let me do it?
Monica: No reason. I-I keep private things in there.
Monica: Feminine stuff.
Monica: Chandler, there is nothing in there that concerns you! If you love me you-youll let it go.
Monica: Thank you! (He tries the door again and Monica glares at him.)
Phoebe: (entering) Hello Chandler, lovely day huh? (To Monica) You!
Chandler: Phoebe if it helps Alexandra has only been massaging Monica for like three years. (Phoebe rolls her eyes and walks away and Monica glares at him.) If! I said, "If it helps!" (Goes to the bedroom.)
Monica: Well its I mean Id justId be self-conscious. Youre my friend; Id be naked.
Phoebe: Monica! We lived together for years! Ive seen you naked!
Monica: Thats different, we were roommates! And when?!
Monica: Hey, come on Phoebe, you can understand why this would be weird for me.
Monica: Okay, if it means that much to you
Monica: Dinosaurs.
[Scene: Phoebe's Apartment, Monica is lying on the massage table waiting for Phoebe.]
Monica: Yes.
Monica: Nice! Wow Phoebe you are good!
Monica: No. Ooohh
Monica: (in a sexy voice) Oh. Oh yeah! Ohhhhh! Ohh! Oh yeah!
Monica: Oh God Phoebe!! (Phoebe covers one ear.) Oh thats it! Thats it! Right there! Oh! (Tries to cover the other ear.) Ooooh-oooh-ooooh (Covers both ears and continues the massage with her elbows.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler has a box of keys and is trying them on the secret closet when someone enters.]
Joey: Whoa, Monica runs a pretty tight ship over here. What are you doing?
Chandler: Monica has a secret closet and she wont let me see whats in it.
Chandler: Why would Monica be keeping Richard in here?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey and Chandler are still working on the door.]
Chandler: Maybe Monica has a bobby pin.
Joey: Sure. "Monica."
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is on the couch as Monica enters.]
Monica: Hey.
Monica: I gotta tell you, yesterday was amazing. That massage felt so good!
Monica: So umm, what do you say we make it a weekly appointment?
Monica: Okay.
Monica: What?
Monica: Whats going on?
Monica: What? (Laughs.)
Monica: What?! Youre crazy! Theres nothing sexual about the noises I make!
Monica: Oh myThis is so embarrassing. Oh my God, Im never gonna get massaged again!
Monica: Really?!
Monica: Are you sure?
Monica: I guess.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is pounding out the hinge pins on the closet door to get it open.]
Monica: (entering) (Gasps) How did you get in there?!
Monica: Oh no! You werent supposed to see this!
Monica: No Chandler, you dont understand! (Chandler starts singing the theme for Sanford and Son, an old TV show starring Redd Fox.) Okay! Okay! Okay! Fine! Now you know. Okay? Im yknow Im sick.
Monica: Really? You promise you wont tell anyone?
Monica: Well its just umm Im afraid you might mess it up.
[Scene: Phoebe's Apartment, Phoebe is giving Monica another massage.]
Monica: Ohhh.
Monica: Ohh. Oh! Ohh!
Monica: Oh God!
Monica: Oh yeah right there!
Monica: Uh Phoebe?
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Well I didnt want everyone to think I was stupid.
Monica: The dinner will be ready in twenty minutes. This is so exciting.
Monica: Im gonna miss you! (They hug.)
Monica: What happened to Janine?
[Cut to Ross and Monica, who are finally on a platform!]
Monica: (loudly) What?!! (Quietly) What?
Joey: You know, you and Bob, and me and my girlfriend, uh, uh, Monica.
Monica: (in an Irish accent) Monica Gellerrr. (She rolls her R)
Monica, Moncia, have a happy Chanukah. Saw Santa Clause, he said hello to Ross. And plese tell Joey, Christmas will be snowy! And Rachel and Chandler, have err-umm-glander!!"
Monica: We owe you?!
[Scene: The Set, Joey, Janine, Ross and Monica are walking in.]
Monica: Why, do you write him a lot?
Rachel: Ok, Monica. I just have to know one thing. Did you go with her to Bloomingdale's? (Monica looks away.) Oh! Ok, ok, ok, I just really, uh, I just really need to not be with you right now. (Exits.)
Monica: Ross hasnt worked at the museum for a year!
Monica: Well, this is the last box of your clothes. Im just gonna label it, "What were you thinking?"
Chandler: (To Monica) Yknow I think you can take her.
Monica: Absolutely!
Monica: No, my eye doctor is Richard! I cant go to him when I dont have a boyfriend!
Monica: Its beautiful! Its like the first bathroom floor there ever was. (Chandler tries to go to the bathroom) Whoa! Are you going in there for?
[Scene: The Set, Monica and Ross are dancing.]
(He happily gestures at Chandler that there was nothing to worry about, then exits. Rachel and Monica are concerned for poor Phoebe, who slides back down next to Ross.)
Monica: What did I tell you about the hall?!
(Cut to Chandler and Monica at the buffet table.)
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Well, I know that would make Joey happy, so, I would like that too.
Monica: Well, maybe youre rightShe made fun of my phone pen!
Monica: Oh, Janine, the really hot dancer girl?
Monica: All right, all right, at least Im prepared.
Monica: Nothing. (She backs away a little bit but is still in his arms and looks up at his eyes.) I dont knUmm. I dont know. Umm
Monica: No.
Monica: That didnt work on mom, its not going to work on us.
[Cut back to Monica and Rachel's apartment, Rachel is singing along with a song and dancing while facing the big picture window. Y'know, I think I'd pay real good money to be on the other side of that window!]
Chandler: (To Monica) Have I got a surprise for you? Pack your bags!
(Ross and Monica high-five)
Monica: Wait a minute, I can get ice at the restaurant
Chandler: Oh, that would be Monica. Hey, listen, I wanna borrow a coupla things, Aurora spent the night, I really wanna make her breakfast.
Monica: Oh, is it that pinball machine with the big bow on it?
Monica: (relieved) Its only you.
Monica: Hm-hmm!
Monica: So do you think that these picturesAre, are they trying to tell a story?
Rachel and Monica: Yeah.
Monica: What?!
Monica: Me neither.
RACHEL: Well, well um, you know, these movies are offensive and uh, degrading to women and females. And uh, and the lighting's always unflattering. And, Monica help me out here.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, okay. I'm uptight. Yeah, that's why I don't want to watch a middle aged guy dance around in what I can only assume is a child halloween costume! (turns to look at Monica and Rachel who look like they feel very sorry for the stripper)
MONICA: This wasn't addressed to Days of Our Lives, this is, this came to your apartment. There's no stamp on it, this woman was in our building.
Monica: I mean, I realize that his feelings may never completely go away, but you can.
Monica: So you didnt leave the bank?
Monica: Do you know whats a bad idea?
[Scene: London Marriott, Monica and Chandler are walking to her room.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bedroom, they are in bed together.]
Monica: (to Erica) Hey, thank you. Thank you so much. (they hugs). You are SO going to Heaven!
Monica: Thats a good idea.
Monica: Its coming from the living room.
Rachel: Monica, what are you doing?
Monica: (interrupting her) Okay, now Thanksgiving's over, let's get ready for Christmas. Who wants to go get a Christmas tree?!
Monica: No, it doesn't, does it? But you wanted lumps, Ross? (picks up the pan of badly burnt potatoes) Well, here you go, buddy, ya got one.
Monica: Yeah.. uh, but for future reference, that thing in your hand can also be used as a phone.
Rachel: (To Monica) Well, people are different.
Monica: Yeah, well you call her and tell her that yknow when we were kids her precious little Frannie tried to undress me several times, okay? And if I hadnt have stopped her, there probably wouldnt even be a wedding to go too.
Monica: Oh yes, it is. I'm sorry I borrowed it, I was cold. I hope its okay?
Monica: All right.
Monica: (loudly) I know!!!
Monica: No, thank you.
Phoebe: Good thats a good one. Okay, Monica, anything? Yknow? Does Rachel move the phone pen?
Monica: I know. Where do you wanna go eat?
Monica: Joey, what are you doing?
Chandler: Be right there sweetums. (Monica leaves. To Joey.) A totally different situation.
Monica: Joey, do you work here?
Monica: Yes, they are. The Blymens invited them.
Monica: Oh, I was thinking about having people over for the game.
Rachel: Yeah! Guess who walks into my office is the end of my story. (To Monica and Phoebe) It was Ralph Lauren! (Monica and Phoebe gasp) Ralph Lauren walked into my office!
[Scene: Richards bedroom, Monica has covered it in rose pedals and candles. We hear Richard come in to the apartment, and Monica frantically throws the rest of the pedals on the bed, and jumps onto the bed and puts a rose in her mouth, and bites a thorn.]
Monica: Y'know what? Ill think youll play.
Chandler: Monica, you remember me telling you that joke, right?
Monica: Hah!
Monica and Rachel: You did!
Monica: Well, then, Im okay with being high maintenance.
Monica: You know, they're not actually supposed to have... (Ross looks at her sheepishly) I'll work on the lumps. Joey, you're going home, right?
Monica: You are so cute. (She goes over and kisses him passionately.)
Monica: Wait Chandler come on, letsits not a big deal!
Monica: Okay, Chandler, you go first.
Chandler: Lets have Monica decide.
Monica: Why do I have to decide?
Monica: Do you want me to pick you?!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone except Joey is there. Rachel is looking out of the window and Ross is handing out some Chinese takeout. There's a small SAP in the corner of the screen.]
Monica: Continue.
(Monica leaves the room)
(Chandler motions to Monica that hell give her two babies.)
Monica: Hi, Chandler. There you are.
Monica: Wait, wait, he came up with that himself. Tell them, Chandler.
Monica: Ahhh! You are on my list.
Monica: (visibly upset) She picked Rachel. I mean, she tried to back out of it, but it was obvious. She picked Rachel.
Ross: (catching the ball) Monica! Stop throwing it so hard! We're on the same team!
Phoebe: (to Monica) Yknow, suddenly I find you very attractive.
[Cut back to Monica and Chandlers room, they are making out again as theres another knock on the door.]
Monica: All right, biggest suite in the place. Come on! (Rolls the dice.)
Monica: Well, that's different. My lie didn't make one of us a felon in 48 states. What were you thinking?
Monica: I pick you, Phoebe.