words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are hosting a New Year's party. So the place is crowded and in a shameless promotion for NBC they're watching Jay Leno's coverage of New Year's from Time Square.]
Chandler: (deadpan, standing next to Monica) We're very happy for you.
Monica: Oh no, wait! Joey!
(And with that everyone starts playing tonsil hockey. Chandler with Monica, Ross with Phoebe, and Joey with Rachel.)
Chandler: (To Monica) Happy New Year!
Monica: Happy New Year.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, after the party. Everyone has left, except for the gang.]
Monica: She has a better chance of sprouting wings and flying up your nose than you do of not making fun of us.
Monica: Hey Rach, maybe your resolution should be to umm, gossip less.
Monica: Well if Ted Kopel talked about his coworkers botched boob jobs, I would.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering with Rachel.]
Monica: Hi Ben!
Ben: Auntie Monica!! (He runs to hug her.)
Monica: I like 'em.
Monica: I like them a lot.
Rachel: Awful, absolutely awful. (Plus other negative comments from Phoebe and Monica.)
(Monica starts taking pictures of Ross and Ben, with the flash.)
Monica: It's my New Year's resolution!
Monica: No! To take more pictures of all of us together. I mean I really think it's the best resolution because everyone will enjoy the pictures.
Joey: Well, everyone will enjoy my music as well. (Does a chord and Monica starts taking pictures of him and Phoebe. They both start to strike a pose with the excessive amount of pictures that Monica takes.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is drilling Joey on the chords as Monica looks on.]
Joey: No, I'm not questioning it, I'm saying it's stupid! (Notices Monica standing between them and smiling.) What?! (The camera clicks, taking another picture.)
Monica: Thank you. (Leaves.)
(Rachel looks shocked, gets over it, notices she's alone, and picks up the phone. The last part of which is something she shouldn't have done, because the phone is already in use. By Monica, and now Rachel can hear every word.)
Monica: (on phone) I can't wait to be with you! I'll sneak over as soon as Ross picks up Ben. I'll just tell Rachel I'm gonna be doing laundry for a couple of hours.
Monica: (on phone) Awww, y'know what your nickname is, Mr. Big
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is returning from his horrible trek back home without pants on. The whole gang is there.]
Monica: We heard about your pants, I'm so sorry.
Monica: Hey, hey, look. Look Ross, Ben drew a picture of you! (Shows him Ben's picture.) Huh? You're-you're a cowboy!
Monica: See? Ben doesn't think you're a loser, he thinks you're a cowboy! Now that's something.
Monica: Okay, now that everything's wrapped up here, I think I'm, I'm gonna go do my laundry.
Rachel: Chandler and Monica?!! Oh, this is unbelievable!! How long have you known?
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Ross, and Monica are there.]
(Monica and Joey enter.)
Monica: Hi.
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, Monica is cooking as a waitress enters carrying a plate of food that has been sent back.]
Monica: I've gotta tell you, Bob is terrific.
Monica: It was okay. Shes still kind of depressed because she broke up with her boyfriend.
[Scene: Iridium, Monica is working as Frannie enters.]
Monica: That was some hot love you gave me! I'm gonna go get ready.
Monica: No! No. Theyre umm Theyre just uh ground beef smileys. (Holding up one of the shells.)
Monica: You invite my brother, you invite my whole family, and not me?! Why?! WhatWhy wouldnt you want me at your wedding? What could I have possibly done?! (Frannies husband walks up.) Stuart!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next day, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are baby-sitting the triplets. They each have one baby.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, tiem lapse. Everyone but Joey and Monica are there.]
Monica: What's going on here? You go out with tons of girls.
Monica: Well, go over to her! She's not with anyone.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table and are still trying to decide what to do about Janice.]
Monica: You could do that!
Monica: How much longer?
Monica: Oh. I'm sorry it didn't work out.
Monica: Good for you, Joey.
[Scene: Joey's bedroom, time lapse. He's asleep and dreaming. In his dream he's doing the crossword puzzle with wait for it Monica!]
Monica: Well, if I had them taken out, then I wouldn't be able to do this. (she pushes Chandler on the couch and brushes her hair and shells against Chandler's chest) You like that, right? (again, she brushes her hair against his chest and hums...)
Monica: How-how did that happen?
Monica: Why not?
Monica: Why would someone do that?! ...One might wonder.
Monica: That is so unfair!
Monica: I could do that.
Monica: Well, what's the part?
(Monica gasps.)
Monica: Hey, come on Phoebe, you can understand why this would be weird for me.
Ross: Monica? You're Mom.
Monica: Yeah, sure... uhm, I'm devastated, obviously... (to the rest) Did you think the neighborhood was homey? (Chandler enters)
Monica: For what?
Monica: (trying not to laugh) Oh my God.
Monica: Alright, alright, alright...
Monica: Oh, you got the whole night, huh?
Monica: You got the job?! Why didnt you tell me?
Fake Monica: I thought that movie was so incredibly... boring. I mean, that thing at the end where the kid kills himself because he can't be in the play? What was that?! It's like, kid, wait a year, leave home, do some community theatre. I walked out of there and I thought, 'Now, that's two hours of my life that I'm never getting back.' And that thought scared me more than all the other crap I was afraid to do.
Monica: Whose little ball of paper is this?!
Chandler: (arm-in-arm with Monica) Hey Pheebs!
Monica: Look, I- I could go on pretending-
[Scene: Fancy restaurant, Monica, Joey, Angela, and Bob are seated at the table.]
Monica: Matt Guire, Mark Lynn, Ben Wire
Monica: (stands up to hand Emma back) Oh no no no no!
Monica: (leaping off of the couch and runs up) Wait! Did you say 'G.Stephanopoulos?'
Monica: My brother's going through that right now, he's such a mess. How did you get through it?
Monica: Maybe this wasn't your shot.
Monica: I think he's shy.
Monica: We're kidding. C'mon, tell us!
Monica: Yeah, the best you got in high school was Wet Pants Geller.
Ross: (Doing the spinning) Okay, Monica: Right foot red.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone with her mother. Phoebe, Rachel, and Ross are there.]
Phoebe: She's already fluffed that pillow... Monica, you know, you've already fluffed that- (Monica glares at her.) -but, it's fine!
Monica: Oh, George, baby, drop the towel!
(After he closes the door, Monica starts to follow him, but thinks better of it and stops.)
Monica: Noooo! (Comes closer and whispers) I'm lying. I am so drunk.
Monica: My boots in tan! Hey! Can you get a little closer so I can see the price?
Monica: Phoebe, you get the bear, uhm, Joey, you get the robot, and Chandler and I get the dog. Ok, and the race is going to go (Takes two cups and marks the start and finish lines with them) from here to here. Now the one who comes in last, stays!
Rachel: Oh God, oh. Great, Monica, y'know what, you could've called, I have been up here, I've been worried...
Monica: Ohh! Ohhhh! Were you sleeping sweetie? Im sorry. Here. (Hands the mug of milk to him.)
Monica: What?
Monica: Hello?
Monica: (to everyone) It's Chandler! (on phone) Are you OK?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, The phone rings; it's Chandler.]
MONICA: No honey. You have to sleep on this side of the bed because I have to sleep on this side of the bed.
Monica: I have no idea what you just said.
Monica: You did not go!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are entering the living room from her bedroom.]
Monica: Oh my God! What were you doing in a library?
Monica: Hey, you better hope that we're pregnant, because one way or another, we're giving a baby back to Rachel.
Monica: Why not?
Monica: Outside.
Monica: And that would be?
Monica: Oh, okay. Here, why dont you let me do it?
Monica: About what?
Monica: My surprise party!
Monica: Joey, what's going on?
Monica: Oh my God! I love him!
Monica: No, you are not. We tell you stuff.
Rachel: Monica? Monica!
Monica: Water rules!
Rachel: Well (At a loss for words, she grabs some of Monica's laundry and throws it on the floor as a diversion to allow Rachel to run back inside and close the door. Monica chases her to find that Rachel had locked the door.)
MONICA: Honey, uh, this is a picture of the frame guy posing in front of a bright blue screen with a collie.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's Balcony, Ross and Rachel are talking.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is coming out of the bathroom after a shower wearing only her bath robe, walks into the kitchen, and opens the fridge. As she bends over to grab a bottle of wine, her robe falls open (Damn this network primetime programming, we didn't see anything!) and she quickly closes it again. But then realizes she didn't have to do that. So she closes the fridge and stands next to the table, thinks about it for a little while and ]
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Phoebe is talking at the phone, Monica is listening amused.]
[Cut to inside. Monica, Joey and Phoebe are singing while outside, Ross and Rachel are trying to get the cat off of Ross' shoulder.]
Monica: Hi!
Monica: Hi!
Monica: What are you doing here? You cant be here!
Monica: (smitten) Hi!
Monica: Hey Frannie, welcome back! How was Florida?
MRS. GELLER: Oh, Jack look, there's that house paint commercial that cracks you up. [the Gellers return to watching TV and Ross goes over to Monica]
Monica: No, it is me! Y'know, I'm not just the person who needs to fluff the pillows and pay the bills as soon as they come in! Y'know, when I'm with her, I am so much more than that. I'm- I'm Monana!
Monica: Oh, is everything in the car?
MONICA: Rose Marie really belongs on a smaller screen, doesn't she?
Monica: Where are we gonna find a tiny little hat?
Monica: Im gonna go across the hall to check on the yams.
Monica: No! No, she doesnt. Uh Phoebe, what she makesthats uhtheyre sock rabbits. They are completely differentOkay! Okay! Okay! I didnt make it! Im sorry! I totally forgot about tonight and the fact that were supposed to make the presents!
(Monica crosses her legs and is still wearing the garter belt.)
Chandler: Well, I tried Billy Jean King, but... (Ross glares at him) you know, you and Monica have the same "I'm gonna kill you" look...? I can usually make it go away by kissing her... (Ross continues to glare at him and Chandler leans in as if he's going to kiss Ross)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is there.)