words in movies
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. Mike and Phoebe seem to have finished watching a movie on television.]
Mike: I'm gonna go. (He kisses Phoebe on the cheek)
Mike: I haven't been home in a couple of days and I need to get some more clothes.
Mike: I put that tube top on as a joke.
Mike: I want to stay too but I've gone as bad as much use out of these boxers as I can..
Mike: Done it. (Phoebe becomes a little more subdued) I'll be back in a couple of hours.
Mike: Me too. (He leaves. A few moments later, he enters again.) You know what? I just realised something. I don't wanna go home.
Mike: No, no! What I mean is, I hate going back to my apartment now... and partly because I live above a known crack den but... mostly because when I'm there, It's just, I really miss you. So.. do you want to move in together?
Phoebe: Wow, Mike Hannigan...You sure know how to make a girl say "Hell yeah!"
Mike: So we're doing it?
Phoebe: Yeah! Let's do it! Let's live together! (They embrace and Mike kisses Phoebe) Oh god, we're really going to move in together!
Mike: Yeah!
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross, Chandler and Monica are sitting on the couch. Phoebe and Mike enters.]
Mike: Phoebe and I are moving in together.
Mike: I'm gonna go to the bathroom.
Mike: Yes dear.
Phoebe: Monica slow down! Ok? I'm just excited to be living with him. You know I mean, I don't know, Can I see someday being married to Mike? Sure! Yeah. Y'know..I can picture myself walking down the aisle in a wedding dress that highlights my breasts in an obvious yet classy way. But do I want that house in Connecticut...you know..near the good schools where Mike and I can send Sophie and Mike Junior.. Oh my god I do.
Mike: You ready to go?
Mike: What are you talking about?
Phoebe: Oh please, these guys, we haven't even moved in yet and they have us picking out china patterns. (Mike seems to gag a little...and laughs nervously. They begin to leave. Phoebe bolts back)
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. Phoebe and Mike are packing stuff.]
Mike: Well hey, I wanna ask you about Monica's little "groomy" joke.
Mike: I get the joke. Sophisticated as it was. Now the thing I wanna say is... maybe we should have talked about this before. Us living together, you're not expecting a proposal, right?
Mike: Yeah well, that's the thing. For me it's as far as it can ever go.
Mike: Look. Phoebe, I-I love you. Very much. But I never want to get married again.
Mike: It's just my first marriage was, you know such a disaster. I kind of lost faith in the whole idea.
Mike: At one point near the end she deliberately defecated.....
Mike: Look it's not about who I would marry. And I was certain the first time I got married it would last forever. And I was totally wrong!
Mike: Look Phoebe, It's not about you. I just never wanna get married again.
Mike: I'm sorry. Are you ok with that? Cause if not...maybe us moving in together isn't the best idea.
Mike: Trust me, I will never...
Phoebe: Mike doesn't ever wanna get married.
Ross: But come on! I mean living together will be great! I mean you guys have so much fun and you love Mike.
Phoebe: I do love Mike.
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. Ross is helping with the packing, Phoebe and Mike are also there.]
Mike: Very cool.
Mike: No but... You don't want to get married either right?
Mike: You wanna get married?
Mike: But if you wanna get married why didn't you say something before?
Mike: I want to live with you too! Let's do that!
Mike: Can we at least try living together? I mean you might change your mind about marriage.
Mike: No.
Mike: But I don't want this to end.
Mike: I can't believe this is gonna end. I guess I'll have my stuff packed up.
Mike: Ok... so...(They hug) Goodbye.
Chandler/Joey/Rachel/Monica: Bye bye Mike!/Cya mike!/Bye mike!/Bye bye now!
Joey: Well, hey! Well... (he takes his mug to toast Phoebe) Here's to Phoebe, who's found the greatest guy in the world! To Phoebe and... (a bit uncertain) I wanna say Mike? (pause) To Phoebe and Mike!
Mike: Oh wow! Im free for her!
Mike: Ok, unless you're not gonna try to get me to join a cult are you?
Mike: Phoebe writes lots of great songs. Wha... What was that one you sang the other night that everybody just loved?
MIKE: (Entering the apartment) I, I was just thinking about how much more we have to talk about.
Phoebe: (Takes mike) Thanks, hi. Um, I wanna start with a song that means a lot to me this time of year. (Shakes bell as an introduction) (Sung:)
(They turn back around to see the baby Monica's carrying, but then they realise what the surprise is. Ross, Mike, Phoebe and Rachel gasp and stare at Chandler and his baby. Joey hasn't figured it out yet.)
Mike: (sighs) No...
Phoebe: Ok. I mean I know I did the right thing. You know, Mike never wants to get married and I shouldn't be in a relationship that has no future... but... pretty soon I'm gonna miss him so much. I'm gonna wanna see him again and you have to stop me from doing that.
Mike: Mom, I thought I told you... Phoebe's a vegetarian.
Mike: I'll tell her that it's over tonight at dinner. I promise.
Mike: So...? What do you think? (looks at his parents, which look in disgust)
MIKE: I'm so glad you're back.� (He hugs Phoebe.)
Monica: Sure! If you're just gonna hang out as friends, then maybe I'll join ya. You know, I'm your friend (to Phoebe) and Mike's friend (Mike is sceptical).
Mike: Yeah, you do that, and I go check my dad for signs of internal bleeding. (Mike walks away and Bitsy walks in the same direction.)
Precious: Screw you, Mike. You're a coward and a bastard, and I hope you rot in hell.
Mike: Phoebe you don't have to eat...
Mike: Well I've got a book around...
Ross: Mike "Gandolf" Ganderson, only like the funest guy in the world.
Helena: Im sorry? (Holds out the mike.)
(They start to leave Central Perk. The band starts to play "Here, There and Everywhere" by the Beatles. The crowd rises from their seats. Phoebe and Chandler walk down the aisle. Phoebe really glows with happiness. So does Mike who watches her walk down the isle. When Phoebe and Chandler arrive, they kiss and Phoebe walks to her bridesmaids.)
Mike: Wow! You look like... like my mom.
Mike: And that's how it's done! (Phoebe kisses him)
Mike: No, my parents are rich.
Mike: Mom, dad, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, these are my parents: Theodore and Bitsy.
Mike: My friend Manny. I asked him to keep me away from you.
Mike: Uhm... Did you just hit my dad?
[Cut to Central Perk, Phoebe at the mike.]
(There's booing around them, and Mike sinks in his chair, holding his hand in above his eyes, hoping no-one would recognize him)
Mike: Hey... Wh... What are you doing?
Mike: Yeah, I'm sure they will, but you don't have to do this... I'm wanting them to get to know Phoebe, not (accent) Phoebe...
Mike: Well, come on...
Mike: No, no, no, you're doing fine, really... Why don't you go talk to my dad?
Theodore: How could you know. Why wouldn't you punch me in the stomach? (Theodore walks out... Mike walks towards Phoebe)
Mike: But, I mean, you have met... humans before, right? Look, why don't you go talk to my mom?
[Scene: Mike's parents house. Dining room again. Both Mike and Phoebe are not at the table, but the others still are.]
Mike: Awesome!
Mike: I'm not interested.
Mike: A little better.
Mike: So what? I mean if even I can get past that, it shouldn't bother you. And you don't have to like her. You just have to accept the fact that I do. I mean, if you even can't be civil to the woman I love...
Mike: Wanna get out of here?
Mike: You do?
Mike: Oh, I made a little something. If I had more time to work on it, it'd be better, but..
Phoebe: So Theodore... I uhm... I can see where Mike gets his good looks from...
Mike: No, no Mike, just Crap Bag. First name Crap, last name Bag.
Rachel: Shake it! (Phoebe, Mike, Chandler, Monica and Joey step in)
Mike: And there is Kevin.
Mike: Phoebe, I love you. There's no-one else in the world I would ask to marry me... three times. But I wanna take care of you, have babies with you, and grow old with you... Phoebe Buffay, will you marry me?
Mike: No! It's my fault. I keep trying to propose in these stupid ways and all I wanna do is tell you that I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
Mike: All right, stop! You know, all Phoebe has done tonight is trying to get you to like her. And maybe that hasn't been clear all the time, but she did her best. And yeah... She's a little different than you are...
Mike: I am Mike.
Joey: Mike.
Phoebe: Mike? Okay! What's his last name?
Mike: Really?
Joey: Which is why I waited until now to introduce you to Mike.
Mike: Well, I'm a lawyer.
Mike: Actually, I just gave up my practice.
Mike: No, I didn't.
Mike: What?!
Mike: There isn't a piano here.
Mike: Do you think that maybe, sometime, I could...
(Phoebe and Mike look at him, and he goes over to the counter.)
Mike: Phoebe (comes in smiling then sees Phoebe crying) what's wrong?
[Scene: Ross goes to see Mike to explain about Phoebe.]
Mike: what's up is Phoebe ok?
Mike: Sure (looks confused) who are you?
Mike: that's why she was weird.
(Monica opens the door and Mike is standing at the doorway)
Mike: I just think there's somebody better out there for you, (pause) I mean I'm not saying me but. maybe me.
Mike: what's wrong?
Joey: MIKE!!!
Mike: Yeah?
Mike: It was nice meeting you!
Mike: (Joey holds up six fingers) Six!
Mike: That's great. What kind of music do you play?
Mike: Hey, so are you sure your ready to go.
Ross: (He knocks at the door, Mike opens it) Hey Mike sorry to just drop by like this, can I come in?
Mike: Oh.
Mike: but you did say it
Mike: Vicrum?
[Scene: Phoebe is sitting with Mike, explaining about Vicrum.]
Mike: Definitely
Mike: uh huh
Mike: But Rachel I thought she just had a baby with Ross
Mike: its Mike Hanagen
Ross: So, so, is Mike coming to dinner?
Phoebe: Yeah, I kinda do. (Mike lets go of her hand) Well, how's this? (she takes Mike's hand and puts it on her breast, she tears open the sugar and puts it in her coffee. Mike thinks it over and nods appreciative. After that, they hold hands again. Joey now enters, and sees the two sitting on the couch, holding hands.)
Mike: Okay. Do you think maybe sometime I could take you out?
Mike: You need both hands for that?
Phoebe: (returns) Okay, that was Mike.
Mike: This is nice.
ROSS: Oh, it's fine.� Actually, I, I invited Mike over.
Mike: Is it?
Phoebe: (impatient) I know Mike, why don't you keep digging?
Mike: So... how many guys have your key?
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. David is still there. Mike closes the door.]
Mike: Did you uhm...
Mike: ...kiss him?
Ross: well then I didn't need to bother you or the four other Mike Hanagens I bothered.
Phoebe: I'm sooo sorry!! I just... I keep thinking about Mike! I'm crazy about David, and we're having so much fun together. Why-Why do I miss Mike? That's-that's gonna go away, right?