words in movies
Written by: Mark Kunerth Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Rachel: Y'know if what I do is so lame, then why did you insist on coming with me this morning? Huh? Was it so I just wouldnt go with Mark?
Directed by: Ben Weiss Written by: Mark Kunerth Transcript by: David Buehrle
Monica: You would not believe my day! I had to work two shifts, and then to top it off, I lost one of my fake boobs, (opens her coat revealing a large burn mark over her left breast.) in a grill fire.
Rachel: But I dont, hmm... (on phone) Oh, who approved that order?! (listens) Well there is no Mark Robbinson in this office. (to Sophie) Get me Mark on the phone!
Rachel: Well, oh, Mark, Im doing this for the wrong reasons, y'know? Im just doing it to get back at Ross. Im sorry, its not very fair to you.
Mark: How've you been?
Rachel: I dont know, you thought See you Saturday was funny. Look honey, Mark is in fashion okay, I like having a friend that I can share this stuff with. You guys would never want to go to a lecture with me.
Joey: Nah, youre not tall enough to be a Mark, but you might make a good Barney.
Rachel: All right. Lets say I had slept with Mark. Would you have been able to forgive me?
Rachel: Look, I know what's going on here, okay, Mark explained it all to me. He said this is what you guys do.
(Mark, approaches from behind and recognizes her)
Rachel: Oh well, the woman I interviewed with was pretty tough, but y'know thank God Mark coached me, because once I started talking about the fall line, she got all happy and wouldnt shut up.
Ross: No, Im genuinely sorry the Mark thing didnt work out. Look, Rach, I want only good things for you.
(She opens the door to reveal Ross with a pencil mark from his forehead to his chin.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Mark is there, opening Chinese food boxes.]
Rachel: Yeah, but its okay, because when Ross left Mark came over.
Ross: A big idiot. Just you have to realize is, this whole Mark thing is kinda hard for me.
[Scene: Rachels office, Mark is packing his stuff into a box.]
Joey: And before you know it, she's with him. And you'll be all, 'Ohh, man!' And he'll be all, 'Yes!' And us, we'll be like, 'Wh-whoa, dude.' And pretty soon you'll be like, (sadly) 'Hhiii,' and, and, and, 'I can't go, Rachel and Mark might be there.' And we'll be like, 'Man get over it, it's been four years!!'
Story by Mark J. Kunerth Teleplay by Richard Goodman Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Rachel: Okay, well if I stop playing with Joey and Chandler, can I play with Mark?
Ross: Congratu!! (sees her hug Mark) -lations-lations.
Chandler: (entering) Okay. Okay. All right. Help! Am I a Mark, or a John?
Mark: (turning around) And wait, I've got something for you. (kisses her)
Ross: (to Rachel) But work comes first! (to Mark) Oh hey, but thats sad about you though, what happened? Burn out? Burn all out, did ya?
Monica: Matt Guire, Mark Lynn, Ben Wire
Carol: Look, I-I-I am sorry that Rachel dumped you cause she fell in love with that Mark guy, and you are the innocent victim in all of this, but dont punish your friends for what Rachel did to you.
Rachel: (on phone) Hello, Mark? Hi, its Rachel Green. (listens) Oh no, dont you apologize. (listens) Yeah, Ill hold. (to Monica and Ross) He left my number at work, but he was helping his niece with her report on the pioneers.
Mark: Yeah, a box full of your desk stuff doesn't exactly say big promotion.
Mark: All right, all right, Im coming over, and Im bringing Chinese food.
Mark: Wow! Somebody wants people to know you have a boyfriend.
Mark: Ive kinda of had this ah, this crush on you. (Rachel is shocked) But since you were with Ross, I-I didnt do anything about it. But, now that youre not, Id really like to ask you out sometime. So-so thats-thats what Im doing, now.
Mark: You wanna talk, I mean I can come over?
Rachel: No, no-no, its okay, calm down. Mark and I talked, and I realised how much I love your stupid brother, and, yeah, we got our problems, but I really want to make it work.
Ross: Dont you realise none of this wouldve ever happened if I didnt think at that same moment you werent having sex with Mark?
Rachel: Youd be okay if you knew that Mark had kissed me, and been naked with me, and made love to me?
Mark: Why don't we have dinner tonight and talk about it?
Mark: Here, let me. (answers phone) Rachel Green's line, how may I help you?
Rachel: Yeah! His name is um, Mark something.
Mark: Are you sure, because we may have something at Louis Vuitton.
Teleplay: Mark Kunerth Story: Dana Klein Directed by: Terry Hughes Transcribed by: Eleonora, Pheeboh, Sebastiano & Vanessa
Rachel: Okay, swear you wont tell, but when Mark left he gave me a key to Joannas office. Do you wanna see the list?
Ross: Huh. Sounds like Mark Something wants to have some sex.
Rachel: Yeah. (turns around) Hi Mark!
Mark: Hey, hold on a second.
Mark: Yes.
Mark: Rachel?
Mark: Twenty percent.
[Scene: Rachel's office, Mark is training Rachel.]
Ross: Hi! What's ah, what's Mark doing answering your phone?
Woman: Mark!!
Rachel: I think I just shipped 3,000 bras to personnel. Oh honey, I gotta go. (to Mark) Mark, I need you!
Mark: Ross of.....
Mark: Oh hi. It's, it's Mark.
Ross: Oh hey, hey Mark.
Mark: Wh-what's that?
Mark: What is going on?
Mark: It's okay, Rachel knows.
Ross: Yeah well if, if, if Mark said that, than Mark's an idiot.
Ross: Yeah. So um, I-I heard about this ah, Mark guy that ah, Rachel met today.
Mark: Hi, Ross.
Mark: So, see ya on Saturday.
Mark: Okay, then.
Sophie: I love Mark. (to Ross) Do you know Mark?
Mark: Yeah, me too.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Mark is there, opening Chinese food boxes.]
Mark: What? Is it my breath?
Mark: Oh, hi. Its Mark.
Mark: Well, then hes, hes probably just, out.
Mark: Its for me.
Mark: Rach, are you okay?
Ross: Is this about Mark?
Rachel: Wow! I mean, I justI cant, I cant believe this. Yknow, I mean you think you know someone even, even Phoebe whos always been somewhat of a question mark.
Ross: Is that Mark?
Monica: Rachel, you and Mark?!
Mark: Um, y'know, before we go ah, theres something I need to say.
Mark: (entering) Hi!
Mark: Hey, what do you want to drink?
Ross: Is this about Mark?
Mark: Thats okay.
Mark: No. And I dont think Im gonna want to.
Mark: Why do all youre coffee mugs have numbers on the bottom?
Story by: Mark J. Kunerth & Pang-ni Landrum Teleplay by: Scott Silveri & Shana Goldberg-Meehan Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Monica: Wait a minute, why dont you just call Mark. (they both look up in shock) I mean, who says you have to sit here and wait for him, youve got to make stuff happen.
Rachel: I cant believe Mark didnt call. Its Sunday night, and he didnt call.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is next to the bay window again, Mark has left.]
Woman: (walking up to Mark) Here's the Shelly Siegal stuff from December.
Ross: Thank you. (to Rachel) So did you ah, did you tell Mark Something about me?
Mark: And who may I say is calling?
Chandler: Hey, look, this name has been holding me back my entire life. Okay, its probably why kids picked on me in school, and why I never do well with women So, as of 4 oclock tomorrow, Im either gonna be Mark Johnson or John Markson.
Mark: Actually, its kinda my fault. I-I quit today.
Ross: Is that Mark?
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is telling Phoebe about Mark, as Gunther eavesdrops behind them.]
(Ross finally looks at the woman kissing Mark.)
Mark: Wow. Im sorry. Eggroll?
Ross: Hmmm. Oh, no, no, I just thinking about something funny I heard today. Umm, Mark, Mark saying Ill see you Saturday.
Mark: Hey, what do you want to drink?
Rachel: Did he call? Did Mark call?
Mark: Yep. Yep, thats what I didnt want to know.
Mark: Hi. Well, look, I was just gonna leave a message, isnt tonight your, your big anniversary dinner?