words in movies
Ross: (To Chandler) Yknow what? Actually Im kinda glad theyre leaving cause uh, I need to talk to you about something.
Chandler: Listen, if you want to borrow money, its kind of a bad time. Im buying dinner for 128 people tomorrow night.
Ross: No, its Its not that. Umm, now what Im going to say to you, Im not saying as your friend. Okay? Im-Im saying as it as Monicas older brother.
Ross: Okay! You guys are getting married tomorrow and-and I couldnt be more thrilled for both of you, but as Monicas older brother I-I have to tell you this. If you ever hurt my little sister, if you ever cause her any unhappiness of any kind, I will hunt you down, and kick your ass! (Chandler laughs.) What? Im-Im-Im serious! (Chandler laughs harder.) ComeHey! Dude! Stop it! Okay? Im-Im not kidding here!
Monica: Im making a list of all the things that are most likely to go wrong at the wedding. Now, that way I can be prepared.
Rachel: Hey! Those are all the things Im responsible for!
Joey: I know! All right, Ill see you guys over there! Im off to fight the Nazis.
Joey: Im doing my scenes with you?
Monica: Im sorry but nothing.
Monica: Ohh, Im so glad. Thank you so much for staying so calm during this. I mean its really, its made me stay calm. (Chandler just looks at her.) I coulda been worse!
Mr. Geller: I didnt even have a chance to act as though Im okay with it!
Rachel: Man in the black dress (Monica walks away and Rachel looks around to find a woman in a black dress.) (To her) Hi! Im Rachel! Im a friend of Monica and Chandlers!
Woman: Im Amanda.
Ross: (clinking a wine glass) Can I have everyones attention please? Im uh; Im Ross Geller.
Ross: Dad dad, please! As I was saying umm, Im Dr. Ross Geller. Uhh, and Im the best man. And uh, this marriage is doubly special for me umm, because not only is the groom my best friend but uh, the bride is my little sister. And, shes the greatest sister a guy could ask for. So if youd all please join me in raising a glass to the, the couple were here to celebrate. (Everyone does so.) To the Bings.
Monica: All right, Im gonna go steam my wedding dress okay? Who wants the responsibility of making sure nothing happens to it?
Rachel: Monica! Im not gonna screw it up!
Monica: Yknow what? Youre right, Im sorry. Actually you were a big help tonight. Yeah, and thanks for putting my grandmother in the cab and making sure she got to the hotel safely.
Rachel: Well of course that is what Im here for!
Rachel: (reading the note) Tell Monica Im sorry.
Phoebe: (walking up) Whats up? (Rachel hands her the note and she reads it.) Tell Monica Im sorry. (Pause) Tell her yourself!
Rachel: Yeah but, maybe its not what we think. Maybe its tell Monica Im sorry I drank the last of the milk.
Phoebe: Or maybe he-he was writing to tell her that-that hes changed his name, yknow? Tell Monica Im sorry.
Ross: LookOkay, Im just gonnaIm gonna have to go find him and bring him back! Okay? You-you make sure Monica does not find out, okay?
Ross: Yes! No-no! I know, I know what the list is! Mom! Look if you see Chandler, could you just let him know Im looking for him?
Mr. Geller: And if you see Rita Moreno, let her know Im looking for her.
Joey: Oh, Im-Im not working tomorrow.
Monica: (entering from her room, excitedly) Im getting married today!!! (She trips and falls.) (Getting up) I think I just cracked a rib. But I dont care because todays my wedding day! My day is finally here!! (Runs back into her room.)
Monica: (re-entering) Im gonna start getting ready! (Goes back into her room.)
Rachel: Im sorry. Im sorry. Its just Its just so sad!
Phoebe: Oh God, this is turning into the worst wedding day ever! The bride is pregnant. The groom is missing. And Im still holding this. (She throws the test back into the trash.)
Ross: No! I made it seem like I was just calling to chat. Pretty sure, they both think Im interested in them.
Phoebe: Okay. Im going with you.
Rachel: Umm Im never gonna getting married!
Rachel: No Monica! Im serious! Oh, maybe I should just forget about it. Become a lesbian or something.
Joey: Excuse me, Aaron? (The director turns around.) Hi! Umm, I have a little problem with the schedules. Originally, I wasnt supposed to work today, and I have this wedding that I really have to be at. Its my best friends, and Im officiating so I really cant work past four.
Joey: Im having surgery!
Joey: Yeah, I-I just made up the stuff about the wedding because I didnt want you to worry about me. But, Im having surgery today.
Richard: Im wearing two belts.
Chandler: Panicking! And using the Internet to try to prove that Im related to Monica. How is she?
Chandler: I want to. I love her so much, but Im afr Its too huge.
Monica: (interrupting) The days and nights are hard! I get it! Okay? Look umm, Rachel Im sorry! I have to start getting ready! Im getting married today!
Monica: (getting up) Im gonna go put my make up on, we have to be at the hotel in an hour! (Starts for the bathroom.)
Rachel: Okay. All right. (Gets up.) Honey listen. When I tell you what Im about to tell you, I need you to remember that we are all here for you and that we love you.
Joey: Look, my best friends are getting married in like an hour. Okay? And Im the minister. Please! Please! Can you pull it together?
Richard: Of course! Im-Im sorry. I-Id hate you to miss anything like that on account of me. I can do this!
Monica: (starting to cry) Im so happy for me.
Joey: Im still on the set!
Joey: I know! Im sorry! The guys drunk, they wont let me go until we get this.
Rachel: Oh my God! Im gonna have to find another minister.
Joey: No! No, Im the minister! All right, look-look, put em both on the phone, Ill marry them right now.
Ross: Im telling you, just a little bit at a time.
Rachel: Well Phoebe, we gotta do something! (They turn the corner.) Well, yknow. I mean theres no way Joeys gonna make it in time. So Im gonna through the hotel and see if theres any other weddings going on.
The Director: Im sorry Joey, as long as hes here and hes conscious were still shooting.
Ross: Hiiii-Ya!! (Chandler lies back down.) Im serious! Youre not walking out on my sister!
Chandler: (standing up) Thats right! Im not!
Chandler: You look beautiful mom. (His dad clears his throat.) You look beautiful too dad. I love you both. (He kisses his dad on the cheek) Im so glad you here. (He kisses his mom.)
Joey: (entering) Thats my line! (He walks up the aisle and to the rabbi) I can take it from here, thanks. (To all) Dearly beloved, Im sorry Im a little late. You may be confused by this now, (Hes still in costume) but you wont be Memorial Day weekend 2002. Well, lets get started before the groom takes off again. Huh? (Monica is shocked and looks around.) We are gathered here today, to join this man and this woman in the bonds of holy matrimony. Ive known Monica and Chandler for a long time, and I can not imagine two people more perfect for each other. And now, as Ive left my notes in my dressing room. We shall proceed to the vows. Monica?
Chandler: (To Ross) No, thats okay. (Ross nods and retreats.) Monica I thought this was going to be the most difficult thing I ever gonna had to do. But when I saw you walking down that aisle I realized how simple it was. I love you. Any surprises that come our way its okay, because I will always love you. You are the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with. You wanna know if Im sure? (He leans in and kisses her.)
Phoebe: Oh my God! Im going out with Eric! Ooh, this day is really gonna be so much better than I thought it was gonna be. Oh Ross, I cant make lunch. (Exits.)
Monica: No! Listen, Im not gonna go through this with you again, okay. Just once I wanna beat when you cant blame it on the broken nose, the buzzer, or the fact that you thought you were getting mono. Lets just call this, tie score and its halftime.
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Yeah, hi! Mrs. Tribbiani? (Listens) Hi, this is Monica Geller. (Listens) Yeah Im just calling to say that Chandler and I uh, really hope you can make it to the wedding. Yeah, apparently a bunch of invitations that we sent werent delivered. Umm, I guess there was some screw up at the damn post office! (Joey nods his approval.) (Listens) T-Tell me about it! (Listens) Yeah, yeah, the US Post Office? No, more like US lost office! (Listens) What are they Irish?! (Joey gives her a thumbs up.)
The Interviewer: So, lets talk about women. Im sure our female readers will be interested to know about your romantic life.
Rachel: Im funny? Oh thank God! Well hey, Ive got a ton of these! Umm, oh hearDo you want a good one? Heres a good one. Umm, you uh, you take a quarter, take a quarter and, and you blacken the edge. Right? (Does so.) And then you say to person, I bet you cant roll this quarter from your forehead to your chin without it leaving your face. And then when they do it, theyre left with a big black pencil line right down the center of their face.
Monica: Well he is! Yeah, I mean marriage is all he talks about! My goodness, in fact, Im the one thats making him wait!
Rachel: Uh, Im just, Im just looking out your window. At-at the view. What are you guys doing?
Richard: Well, apparently Im willing to offer her things that you are not.
Monica: Chandler, Im gonna die a virgin!
Chandler: I say, Drew! Are you seeing anybody right now? (Drew looks at him) Og-ee-op, Im not asking for me, Im I mean No, Im-Im not gay, Im not asking you out. Im not-Im not-Im not gay!
Chandler: You dont turn and slide, you throw it out! Im tired of having to get a tetanus shot every time I get dressed!
The Dry Cleaner: Thats my wife!!! Get out! (Starts yelling at him in Russian, and Im betting hes not saying pleasant things about him.)
Monica: That is completely untrue. You think Im high maintenance? Okay, prove it. I want you to make a list and were going to go through it point by point!
Phoebe: (running up) Okay. Okay, heres what were gonna do. Okay, Im gonna break into this mini-van and put it in neutral. You guys push it forward so Ross can drive out of his spot. Okay? All right, here we go. (She opens her coat and reveals that thing car thieves use to break into cars as Ross jumps in behind the wheel. She inserts the device, unlocks the door, opens it, and the alarm goes off.) Haul ass!!!! (Runs off.)
Monica: Yess!! (M & C high-five and Zack looks confused again)
Joey: Oh-no-no-no, you are! You do this, you give me the great advice, and hey listen, I was thinking about what you said yesterday about focusing on one woman, Im gonna do that.
Joey: (Putting his arm around her.) Im not going anywhere, sweetheart.
Ross: (to Mona) Oh but not that way. I mean I mean Im not in love with her. I love her like a, like a friend.
Joey: Well, you shouldve told me that before, Im not a mind reader. Hey, were out of beer. Im going to Monicas.
Monica: Okay. Im guessing that if you dont want to deliver, you probably dont want to pick stuff up either.
Ross: Im the ring bearer.
Joey: Im gonna go down there and teach that guy a lesson.
Ross: No, it turns out that the one from uptown was making a joke. But it was a different joke than I thoughtit wasnt that funny. So Im still torn.
Phoebe: Thats right, there you go! Crushes happen all the time! I know Ive had them for all you guys. Well, except for Ross and Chandler. And Im sure youve had them for us.
Phoebe: Oh Jim, Jim Nelson Im Phoebe, Phoebe Buffay. We certainly have been seeing a lot of each other lately.
Ross: I actually had a topic in mind! Im, Im kinda going through a dry spell, sex wise.
Phoebe: So, we realize thatOh no (She resets herself) Im telling it! Im telling it (She loses it.)
Rachel: Yes, they will! You know what you should do? Just go take a walk, all right? I know your size and I’m... I’m gonna pick up some really good stuff for you.
Phoebe Sr.: Sorry. But just one last thing. Y'know you came looking for family. Im family, Im it. Now, now Im done. (starts to leave)
Chandler: (motioning with his hands) Im not worried, Im uh, Im fascinated. Yknow its like uh, Biology! Which is funny because in high school I uh, I-I failed Biology and tonight Biology failed me. (Exits as Phoebe enters from her room with her guitar.)
Chandler: Hey. I just, I just wanted to come over to-to say that Im sorry. Yknow? I know I acted like the biggest idiot in the world, and I can completely understand why you were so upset.
Phoebe: So have you decided on a band for the wedding? Because, yknow, Im kinda musical.
Chandler: Im sorry. Youre not easy-going, but youre passionate, and thats good. And when you get upset about the little things, I think that Im pretty good about making you feel better about that. And thats good too. So, they can say that youre high maintenance, but its okay, because I like maintaining you.
Monica: You bet your ass Im gonna fire you! Get out of my kitchen! Get out!! (Joey leaves) All right! Anybody else got a problem? How bout you Chuckles? You think this is funny now?
Phoebe: Hi Phoebe Abott, Im your best friends daughter!
Rachel: (screams and grabs a potato masher to defend herself) Sorry. Im sorry.
Will: I actually know what youre talking about. Im here to tell you something my friend, you can eat and eat and eat but nothing will ever fill that void.
Chandler: Yeah, you got me. (picks up a 2x4 and puts it through the handles so that the doors wont open) Im out five big ones! (puts the money in the crack between the door and frame) Here you go.
Phoebe: I�m starving. I know we were coming here tonight, I ate nothing all day.
Phoebe: Im just taking it to be re-wired.
Chandler: No-no-no-no-no-no-no!! I cant get myself right out of them! You must have me confused with the Amazing Chandler!! Come on, you have to unlock me, she could be gone for hours, and Im cold, and (Stops and looks up the skirt on a statue behind Joannas desk.)
Monica: Stop it Chandler. (Chandler is relieved) Im sorry too.
Monica: You know what Id love to do? I would like to go to France and eat nothing but bread and cheeseNot even bread, just cheese. No, I want the bread. Yeah. Ah, and pastries (Breathlessly) And pate. Oh, Im really not high, its just I used to be fat.
Ross: Please! Are you kidding? I-I hurt three huge men, I gave a guy a bloody noseI mean I-Im not proud of it but, I really am. And its all because of you, wonderful, amazing you.
Phoebe: Im wearing his briefs right now.
Phoebe: Uh, only if you have the hiccups too. Yeah, the pictures are for you, the water and the chocolate is for me. I just didnt feel like getting up. Okay, Im gonna show you a picture of Ross. Okay? And youre going to remember all of the bad things about him. All right? Really focus on his flaws.
Chandler: Im gonna do it tomorrow yknow, and-and surprise her, but now youve ruined it!
Chandler: Oh good. Good, because Im sure this interview is gonna last a couple of weeks.
Jill: Its probably because not mature enough. Or smart enough. Maybe he doesnt like the way I dressNo that cant be it. Its really gotta be the smart thing. Oh Im so stupid! Im just like this incredibly pretty stupid girl!
Helena: Im not very fond of New York. Queens I like. (Noticing Monicas ring.) Ooh, what is this sparkle something! (Shows the audience who woos.) Honey! Huh?
Ticket Agent: Im afraid Im going to have to ask you to step aside, Miss.
Ross: Mr. Morse I need to talk to you about your mid-term exam, Im afraid I-I had to fail you.
Phoebe: Im just saying, get his number just in case. But no Chandler is in an accident and cant perform sexually and he would want you to take a lover to satisfy the needs that he can no longer fulfill.
Rachel: Well, oh, Mark, Im doing this for the wrong reasons, y'know? Im just doing it to get back at Ross. Im sorry, its not very fair to you.
Monica: Okay, I feel like Im talking to Lassie. All right, Phoebe would you just tell me!
Phoebe: Oh hey Mon? Rach is here! Ohh, youre still pregnant. Oh, Im sorry. I know how uncomfortable you are. Yknow what? You look great. Yeah, like fifty bucks.
Joey: So you like the nachos uh? Myself Im partial to
Elizabeth: Ross, I think you misunderstood what I was saying. I just wanted to tell you that Im going to Florida for a couple weeks.
Rachel: Im sorry, I was just reading the joke below it. Man, that one is funny. (Ross grabs the magazine away from her.)
Joey: Im missin picture time?! (Jumps over to look, Ross glares at him and he retreats.)
The Fan: Can-can I get your autograph, Im your biggest fan. (Holds out a napkin and a pen.)
Ross: (yelling, thinking Emily can hear him through the answering machine all the way to New York.) I love you too! Im, Im gonna call you right now from the phone booth! (Realises) You cant hear me. (Goes to make his call.)
Joey: Oh no, I cant go. Im practicing; I got an audition to be the host of a new game show.
Melissa: (quietly) Im a party planner. Ill see you tomorrow. (Exits.)
Rachel: Well, there was a disaster in shipping and Ive got to get this order in. Honey, Im so sorry, but it looks like Im gonna be here all night.
Rachel: Yeah, maybe, but I dont think I even care. I dont think hes the one Im sad about. Yknow, I know that I said that I am totally okay with Ross getting married, but as it turns out, I dont think Im handling it all that well.
Monica: Im-Im sorry, its just that umm Well I-I cook at this restaurant, Alessandros, and umm I just got a really bad review
Chandler: You are gonna be a huge star! Im gonna hug ya!
Monica: My mothers driving me crazy, but Ross is getting married. Im happy. (A drunken man approaches.) Im not going to let anything spoil that.
Ross: Im going to uh Im going to, um, put the bourbon in it at home.
Ross: Hey, itll grow back, right? And she-shes really fun, and shes cool, and-and Im finally moving on. Y'know? I mean getting over Rachel was so (makes an incoherent nasal sound), y'know? Y'know, and Im finally feeling sane again. And now if I go up there, and-and I kiss her, and, Gooood I wanna kiss her, and-and-and it doesnt work out, right? Do I really wanna put myself through that again?
Joey: Im so sorry. Look, if it was up to me you would never leave the show.
Monica: Okay, Im never gonna wear them again. I just didnt get a chance to say goodbye.
Rachel: and I know Chandler is kidding but it happens every time he touches my stomach. I mean Im really worried the babys not going to like him. (Joey is staring at the table.) Are you okay?
Chandler: Im sorry, I guess I just like the pulp.
Monica: I mean, all Im asking for is just a little emotion! Is that too much to ask after six years?! I mean what? Are-are-are Rachel and I not as close as you guys?! I mean do we not have as much fun?! Dont I deserve a few tears?!! I mean we-we told Joey, he cried his eyes out!
Ross: Hey, Im not going to rush into anything!
Chandler: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you! (To his girlfriend) And you are about to marry a wonderful man! (She stunned and hes horrified.) Hey! Im marrying a dead woman!
Cecilia: Im supposed to meet and hug a fan whose dying, but thats not supposed to be until (to no one in particular) later!
Mona: Ross, we we have to be strong. Okay, I-Im gonna go. (She picks up the shirt Ross has just set down.) Can I? To remember you?
Joey: Thats okay. Chandlers the one Im mad at.
Joshua: Yeah, but it wasnt much fun dropping it off at the dry cleaners in the skirt. (Rachel laughs) So I need everything down to underwear, so if youre willing, Im all yours.
Rachel: Okay. Its okay. Were gonna be okay. Yknow what? Its okay. Im gonna, Im gonna, Im gonna boil some water and just rip up some sheets!
Chandler: (To Chandler) Im out of words. Should I just say the whole thing again?
Ross: Okay, Im done with my choices, these are final. (holds up a little card)
Monica: Well, Ive tried everything. I give up. I guess Im not gonna be the mom who makes the worlds best chocolate cookies. I do make the best duck confit with broccoli rabe. Kids love that right.
Rachel: Hi! Uhh, do you guys have plans for the weekend? Because I have my sister on hold, and she said that we could use her cabin for the weekend and go skiing. Huh? Im asking you first, right?!. I mean Im playing by the rules.
Monica: (entering from bedroom) Okay, Ill be back in just a minute. Oh, Phoebe Im sorry that I left lipstick marks on the phone.
Phoebe: Ohh! Okay, Im going to have to kick her ass too.
Chandler: �kay, look: Can we just drop this? I�m not gonna smoke again.
Phoebe: Yknow, dirty talk, m�nage � trois, toys
Rachel: Ooh, so cute, that Im thinking about jamming this pen in my eye.
Chandler: Im a little busy here Paul.
Phoebe Sr: I mean, I know what Im talking about. I gave up two babies, and I only wish I had someone there that had given up babies, that could tell me how terrible it is to give up babies. I just think that, it would be something you will regret every single day for the rest of your life. So, how ever hard it is to give up this puppy, it would be like a million times harder to give up a child. (Phoebe is playing with the puppy again, and not listening) I really shouldnt have given you the puppy first.
Ross: Yeah, why is it staring at me? I think it knows Im talking about it. (Rachel starts to peek at the file) Dont-dont youWhWhaHey!!
Phoebe: Gosh. Im not gonna let that man make you eat your baby. (They both sit down by the rest of the gang and Phoebe recognizes a man by the window.) Oh. Hey! Who is that guy? I think I know him.
Rachel: You know what? Ive been thinking about it. Im really coming around on the name Ruth. I think I would actually consider naming our child that.
Monica: Im gonna go tell Joey that (laughs) that youre back. I was really worried about you. (Exits.)
Monica: Well, this is the last box of your clothes. I’m just gonna label it, "What were you thinking?"
Joey: Yeah-yeah right. Thats okay. Thats fine. Thats uh, pretty much what I was expecting. So uh, its no big deal. All right? I think Im gonna go. (Stands up.)