words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is watching Quincy M.E. as Chandler is walking into the living room from his bedroom.]
Ross: (triumphantly) Im gonna be on TV!!
Monica: Oh God, Im so sorry.
Monica: Oh absolutely. I like it even more on you than I did on Colonel Sanders. (Ross starts to leave) Ross! Ross! Im kidding!
Monica: I cant do it. Im sorry, I wish I could, but umm, see you have these feelings for me....
Monica: Oh, thats great! I mean Im-Im sorry, but Im so happy for you. And now I can work for you!
Monica: Oh my God! Oh, this is incredible! Ohh! (she rolls over and kisses him on the cheek) All right, y'know what? Im just gonna roll right into that office and-and quit!
Monica: (rolling towards the office) Im quitting!! Woo-hoo! (She rolls through a doorway and out of sight. We then hear a big crash, and see Monica roll past the door the other way.) Im okay!! Im all right!!
Phoebe: Im just saying, this woman, I mean shes fictitious. No?
Phoebe: Yeah, no, Im fairly intuitive and psychic. Its a substantial gift.
Phoebe: No Im serious. I mean Im intuitive, but my memory sucks.
Joey: Well, anyway, I got to go change, Im ah, meeting some of the cast for drinks.
Chandler: Yes, here it comes! Im stuck here all day, and then you come in and spend two seconds with us and then expect to go off gallivanting with your friends? Well I dont think so mister!
Rachel: Im fine, Im fine.
Rachel: Look, Im fine. Watch. (She picks up an aspirin between her toes) Look at that. (She lifts her leg to grab the aspirin with her hand and almost falls over.) Whoa-whoa!
Ross: And Im sure youre gonna make a big impression. Hi! Im Rachel Green. Its nice to meet you. (He lifts his leg and imitates shaking hands with it, just like how Rachel was trying to pick up the aspirin with her feet.) Come on, you probably have a broken rib!
Ross: Sorry, Im sorry. Close, close, close...
Ross: Im sweeping...
Monica: Hey, guess what Im doing tonight.
Monica: Im checking out the restaurant with Pete.
Ross: Ah, Im sorry.
Ross: Okay, okay, Im sorry, it will never happen... (closes eyes) Uh-oh! Wait a minute! Wait-wait, now there are a hundred of you and Im the king.
Rachel: O-kay!! See what you did, Im gonna be doing it by myself now. Okay?
Ross: Okay, Im gonna get your coat and then Ill-Ill put you in a cab.
Rachel: Im sorry, I just cant go to the hospital lookin like this.
Monica: Okay, I feel like Im talking to Lassie. All right, Phoebe would you just tell me!
Chandler: If they cant find a home for her, they kill her! And Im not gonna let that happen to little Yasmine!
Chandler: Thanks, Im glad you see it that way.
Monica: I dont believe this! Wow, look at this refrigerator! Its gigantic! I mean I could live in this thing! Id be cold, but Im always cold. Oh my God, look at these spider burners! I love spider burners.
Pete: Now, nooo! Im just excited about the restaurant, thats all.
Pete: Look, the only who stands to get hurt is me. And Im okay with that.
Monica: And well, we probably shouldnt see each other anymore. Im sorry.
Pete: Im sorry things didnt work out...
Rachel: Oh, Im sorry I spoiled youre evening.
Ross: Perhaps. Now Im curious, at what point during those girlish screams would you have begun to kick my ass?
Monica: Oh, I havent had that feeling since I first started going out with Chandler. Wow, Im never gonna have that feeling again am I?
Rachel: Oh god what am I gonna do you guys, I cant even comfort my own baby! Im the worst mother ever!
Eric: Come in, Im so glad youre here.
Chandler: I dont wanna know what Monica got me. Yknow? I mean, look, Im sure she worked really hard at getting you a present, and wanting to surprise me, and you guys are gonna ruin that, and I, look we have to put these back, this is not what Christmas is about.
Don: Uh, not really. But when it comes to cheese, Im one of the people who thinks the smellier the better.
Joey: Well, ah, Im an actor. Im fairly neat. I ah, I got my own TV. Oh, and dont worry Im totally okay with the gay thing.
Chandler: Yeah. (Checks his hair.) Oh no wait, Im not an nine-year-old girl.
Ross: No-no-no, Im saying we-we buy more of this (disposable cameras) at the gift shop, throw our tuxes back on, and take a few pictures. All we have to do is make sure not to get anybody elses faces.
Chandler: I hope you know what Im giving up for ya, because shes not just the boss in your office, if you know what I mean.
Chandler: No, no, I keep trying, yknow? I can get out, "Joey, I have too " but then I lose my nerve and I always finish with, " go to the bathroom." He may think Im sick.
Pete: Could you leave a note? Cause Im on a lot of pain killers now, and I dont know if Ill remember this tomorrow. (She leaves.)
Phoebe: OkayOop! Too late! Im leaving! Come on Chandler lets go! (She storms out.)
Rachel: Well yknow, its you guys. You-you do this kind of stuff! Yknow? I mean, you-you were gonna get married in Vegas and then you backed out! I guess Im not upset because I dont see you guys going through with it. Im sorry.
Rachel: Oh, Im fine. (Gasps in pain as she sits down.)
Rachel: He didnt turn me down! Hes at the game isnt he? I got the date, Im just not on it!
Phoebe: (entering) Hey, you guys. Listen, Im sorry that I was hogging the game before(Sees the top ten list)Oh my God! Your friends have some unfortunate initials!
Ross: (To Monica) Okay, I know Im not supposed to know, but I do. And Im so excited for you!
Rachel: And y'know what, Im gonna, Im gonna go to bed now, but ah, on my way to work tomorrow morning, Im gonna stop by around 8:30.
Monica: When girls hang out, we dont have pillow fights in our underwear. (Chandler gets a hurt look on his face.) Im sorry. We do. We do. I dont know why I said that.
Ross: Oh, I thought it was just a kid yelling, "Im gay! Im gay!" Can I bring her in?
Guy: I-I think Im gonna look around a little bit more.
Janine: (entering from her room) Monica! Chandler! Im really-really sorry about tonight. I dont know if Joey told you; I just couldnt get out of going to this play. Im sorry. Have a great time.
Phoebe: Oh, Im so sorry. Um, and maybe Im wrong! I butyknow Im gonna go out with him again, Ill find out more.
Joey: Sure I can, standard shotgun rules, Im sight of the room and I called it.
Ross: Joey, Im not worried about her! Im worried about my baby! Whoever she dates my baby dates! Now-now where is this (makes the quote-marks sign) actor taking them?
Monica: No! But, Im throwing this shirt away! I think there was a little misunderstanding before.
Monica: No! No, she doesnt. Uh Phoebe, what she makesthats uhtheyre sock rabbits. They are completely differentOkay! Okay! Okay! I didnt make it! Im sorry! I totally forgot about tonight and the fact that were supposed to make the presents!
(They go around the last row of bookshelves and find a couple doing what college coeds do in secluded corners of university libraries. For those of you who dont know what Im talking about, lets just say that clothing is undone. Ross gasps and the couple gets up and runs away.)
Monica: Honey, Im not returning them. Okay? I mean I-I know they cost a lot, but Im going to wear them all the time. Youll see. Besides, I love the compliments. I mean, have you ever had something so beautiful everyone wanted it?
Rachel: Oh no, you guys, just stay here, Im gonna go check her diaper, Pheebs you wanna come?
Rachel: Im not saying that Im a lesbian! Im just saying that this happened!
Ross: Look, Im not trying to get out of anything, okay. I thought our relationship was dead!
Ross: A hundred?! Well, I-I guess Ill take aMona, uh I-Im not sure about the whole uh, card thing.
Rachel: (sees the chick and the duck) Oh, yeah, Im sorry. They used to live here; sometimes they migrate back over.
Rachel: But IBut everything is okay. Im fine!
Rachel: Im thinking, Im gonna order a pizza.
Chandler: (clearly lying and hating the dessert) Yeah, this is so good, that Im gonna go enjoy it on the balcony so that I can enjoy the view whilst I enjoy my dessert.
Joey: Really?! I like your natural color. Come on man, its a great part. Look, check it out. Im the lead guys best friend and I wait for him in this bar and save his seat. Listen-listen. Im sorry, that seats saved.
Joey: Im gonna miss you, youre the hottest roommate I ever had.
Monica: "Hi Im Rachel, is my sweater too tight? No? Oh, Id better wash it and shrink it!"
Joey: No hey Rach, its cool okay? Yknow Im a loner too! (Heads for his room.) Right?
Phoebe: I cant believe Im gonna have a party! This is so great! (Really excited) A party! (Really, really excited) Yay!! (Suddenly, she starts crying and Rachel moves to comfort her.) I dont know why.
Rachel: Thats right, he can have his job back. Im glad we got that all straightened out. There you go, Joey, you got your job back.
Chandler: (on phone) Hi! Im back. (Goes to hang up the phone.) Yeah, that sounds great. (Listens) Okay. Well, well do it then. (Listens) Okay, bye-bye. (He hangs up the phone and turns around to see Joey standing close to him and screams.)
Janine: Okay, now Im really late. (Gets up.)
Phoebe: Im, uhh, making up flyers trying to get new massage clients. So, can I come to Bloomingdales and use the copy machine.
Phoebe: So, I decided Im definitely going to go with either Joey or Chandler.
Rachel: Oh please, I hate packing, its closer to work, and we do have fun. Although, Im really gonna miss living with you.
Doug: Good God Bing I well I cant say Im altogether surprised, I saw the way she looked at you, and there was no love there. And the way she looked at me, pure lust.
Phoebe: Hi, its Phoebe. Listen someones gonna have to take my 9:00 with Mr. Rehack, cause its like 9:15 now, and Im not there.
Chandler: (in a manly voice) Yeah well, Im gonna go spit. (He goes into the bedroom. On his way out, Joey gives Rachel a wide berth.)
Phoebe: Oh! Im a masseuse. I give people massages and stuff.
Joey: Oh yes I do. Otherwise whats next? Today Im just a guy who cant finish a turkey, but tomorrow Im the guy who eats half a Powerbar, wraps up the rest, and puts in the fridge? No! No, I just I justI gotta change my pants. (Gets up and heads for the door.) Jeans have no give. (Exits.)
Rachel: Oh, Ross, Im sorry. I completely ruined your evening.
Phoebe: Im sorry, okay, I-I wasnt looking, and the store says that they wont take it back because you signed for it...
Rachel: You know what Im going to do? Im going to get in my sweats, and eat this in bed! (exits)
Monica: I do! Im a professional chef! (The class gasps.) Oh relax! Its not a courtroom drama!
Ross: Well Im, Im a little slow. (To himself) Just as our children would be.
Ross: No, hey, I get that, okay, I get that big time. And Im happy for ya, but Im tired of having a relationship with your answering machine! Okay, I dont know what to do anymore.
Isabella: (reading it) Im not on the list!
Joey: Im the lead in Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.!!
Courtney: Oh! Okay! Im gonna try it without the coffee cup cause I think its the left hand thats messing me up.
Joey: Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Like-like when Im doing something exciting and I dont wanna get too excited, I just ahh, yknow try to thing of other things like ah sandwiches, and ah baseball, and ah Chandler!
Isabella: Im sorry. (starts to leave)
Ross: Im sorry the answer there would be...none of us.
Rachel: All right, its okay. One little setback is okay, just dont let it happen again, all right? Now since daddy paid for all this stuff, I should take it all away. But Im just gonna take the-the pajmena. (Ross hands it to her.) And the uh, and the uh pants. Yknow what, Im just gonna take it all away, cause that way youll just really learn the lesson. Okay? All righty, Im gonna run a couple of errands and I will see you at dinner. (Leaves with all of Jills stuff.)
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up as her boss, Mr. Waltham, walks in.) Oh! Mr. Waltham, I ah really need to talk to you.
Rachel: Im serious, I really, I think I need just to have some...meaningless, sex y'know, with the next guy that I see.
Phoebe: Im sorry.
Monica: What? Im just said.
Eric: She, now I knew that and now Im sweating. Look at me, Im really sweatingNow Im saying, "Look at me," Im getting even sweatier. I think I probably should go.
Parker: Dahaaa! (Punches Chandler in the arm and he makes a face of pain.) Im going to find the mens room, be right back.
Chandler: Hey, Im going for sushi does anybody want.. (enters and sees the bed) Whoa-whoa, somebody missed the off ramp.
Chandler: (to Joey) Noo!! I dont care! Im not, Im not gonna playing one-on-one strip poker with you for practice!
Ross: No! For all I know, shes trying to find me but couldnt because I kept moving around. No, from now on, Im staying in one place. (He sits down on the bed.) Right here.
Ross: Look, look Im sorry. Its just that....
Rachel: Im sorry, let her?
Chandler: Okay, Im not gonna have one.
Monica: See Chandler? Im getting a lot of use out of them already! Theyre very practical. See, you can wear them with dresses, with skirts, with pants
Ross: Cause Carols a lesbian. (Phoebe is shocked) And, and Im not one. And apparently its not a mix and match situation.
Joey: Im telling you man, I saw it.
Woman: Im Margha.
Phoebe: Oh this, well Im glad you asked. (She opens the case and removes a knife and an soda can.) Now, dont you hate it when you have to cut a tin can with an ordinary steak knife? (She efficiently cuts it in half.) Ahh! Now, I know what youre thinking
Joey: No, no, no! Its real! And it has been since 1998. (Rachel returns from the bathroom.) Hey Rach! Rach! Im up for a Soapie!
Phoebe: (in a deep voice, imitating Ross) Um, Rachel Im really sorry. (imitating Rachel) Thats okay, do you wanna get back together? (imitating Ross) Yeah, okay. (in her normal voice) Did anyone else hear that?!
Rachel: Yeah honey, Im standing right there! Why didnt you just tell him about the mole I havent got checked yet.
Monica: Im sick of Japanese. Were not going there.
Rachel: Ohh, okay, Im sorry. Youre right. Yknow what? We absolutely can stay married, because I was under the impression that the boxes were far away from each other. All right, look, just please, take a moment here and think about what youre asking of me.
Chandler: Sorry. Im sorry. Y'know what, were just gonna throw it.
Bob: I just had a meeting, I was actually hoping to get transferred up here, but I just found out its not gonna happen. Apparently somebody thinks Im not eleventh floor material. Say uh, who the hell is this Chandler?
Tag: When Im in a relationship, I love having a girlfriend.
Woman: Im Dutch.
Chandler: Okay. 1 2 3Go! (Once again hes at a stalemate, but this time hes in pain.) (Pause) Im gonna kill myself!
Joey: Im not finished.
Joey: No, no, no more! I cannot lose another dime! Im serious this time! In-in fact, look, theres aI wanna give you something. And let me give it too you know before I pawn it for Cups money. (He rolls the big white dog over) Now, I want you to have the big white dog as a kinda of a, yknow, thank you for being such a great roommate.
Joey: Whoa, whoa, no, no, I-Im not playing with this guy, now.
Monica: Youre so pathetic! Why cant you just accept it, were winning because Im better than you.
Joey: Hey-hey, Im not judging.
Rachel: Thats not her name! Im sorry, she just doesnt feel like an Isabella.