words in movies
[Scene: A Theatre, Chandler and Ross are there to watch the premiere of Kathys play.]
(Onstage theres a knock on the door and Kathy opens it. We dont see whats going on, only hear it.)
Kathy: Hi!
Kathy: No, youre my first. Put the money on the table.
(Ross and Chandler have stunned looks on their faces as Kathy and her co-star start making out.)
Kathy: If you want it to be.
(Kathys co-star rips her blouse off and buttons go flying into the audience, and one hits Ross. Chandlers mouth is on the floor.)
Phoebe: Ooh! How was Kathys play?
Ross: Well, Kathy gets half-naked and simulates sex with a real good lookin guy.
[Scene: Kathys play, Ross and Chandler are waiting for her in the lobby after the play.]
Kathy: Hey you guys!
Kathy: Hi! (Kisses Chandler) Thank you so much for coming again. Did you like it tonight?
Kathy: Wasnt Nick funny when he couldnt get his match lit?
Kathy: Its a good play, isnt it?
Kathy: Clearly, Im having sex with him?
Kathy: Okay, so let me just get this straight. Youre accusing me of cheating on you, and insulting my performance?
Kathy: Acting! Chandler, this is my job! Im-Im playing a part in a play! How can you not trust me?!
Kathy: Oh, wow. I cant believe youre throwing that in my face.
Kathy: Ill tell you what, Chandler, why dont you call me when you grow up!
Chandler: Steps! (He opens the door to his apartment to Ross and Joey looking at the new Playboy) Slut! (Ross and Joey quickly hide the Playboy behind their backs. Chandler wonders into the girls apartment.) You will all be very happy to hear that Kathy is sleeping with that guy!
[Scene: Kathys apartment, Chandler is knocking on the door.]
Kathy: (opening the door) Hey.
Kathy: Oh wow. I really wish youd call me.
Kathy: Yeah.
Kathy: Yeah, they teamed us up as partners. Joey picked three scenes for us to do; all of them had us making out.
Chandler: Uh Kathy, with K or a C?
Kathy: (entering) Hey! (sees whats on TV) Oh God, is that Baywatch?
Kathy: No, no, it's not like that. I, I work for a medical researcher.
Joey: Yeah, you've been avoiding her ever since we started going out. Look, I made an effort to like Janice, now I think it's your turn to make an effort to like Kathy by going out to dinner with us. Right?
Chandler: Look, Joey, Kathy is clearly not fulfilling your emotional needs. But Casey, I mean granted I only saw the back of her head, but I got this sense that shes-shes smart, and funny, and gets you.
Kathy: Hey Rachel!
(Kathy enters (Because shes listed in the credits).)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Kathy are sitting at a table and talking about Joey.]
Rachel: Gay? Yeah. (Kathy leaves dejectedly.)
Kathy: (on phone) Hey. (listens) Oh no its fine, dont worry about it. (listens) Yeah-no, stop apologizing, its okay. (listens) Yeah! Ill talk to you tomorrow. (hangs up) (to Chandler) I should uh, probably go.
Kathy: Okay. Understanding a little more why you're single. Ohh! Y'know, I have a friend you would like, she's really pretty. And then we could double date!
Kathy: You really didn't have to. (Opens the box) Wow.
Kathy: Cute assistant! Whats his story? Is he
Kathy: No, I... I didn't mean the pen. Thank you for the book.
Kathy: By being in a box?
Chandler: You dont have to stop having fun just because Im here. Kathy didnt cheat on all of you. (To Joey) Well, except you. (They hug and Chandler goes into the bathroom with the chick and duck following him.)
Joey: Hey guys. (to Chandler) Listen uh, you wanna get some dinner with me and Kathy tonight?
Chandler: Goin out, huh? Wow! Wow! (Does a little celebration dance) So things didnt work out with Kathy, huh? Bummer.
Chandler: Wish it! (To the woman, Kathy, he likes) Hi. Hi, I-I was just sitting over there, and uhh, Chandler. My name is Chandler. Did I say that?
(Kathy leans in really close and Chandler mouths "Oh my God." She moves around in front of him and kneels at his feet.)
Monica: Hey, Joey, I dont think that you should leave Chandler alone. I mean its only been two days since he broke up with Kathy. Maybe you can go fishing next week?
Joey: Ah. Hm. (To Kathy) Wanna go to bed?
Kathy: Well, uh, when Joey gave it to me, he said, "This is 'cause I know ya like Rabbits, and I know ya like cheese." Thanks. I love it. And I know how hard it must have been for you to find.
Kathy: I'm sorry, it's just this Ernie Cofax thing on in a few minutes I wanted to watch.
Chandler: Kathys with her parents, I have nothing to do, so tomorrow we are partying with Gandolf dude!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is watching TV as Joey and Kathy are laughing in Joey's bedroom. They get to be pretty loud so Chandler turns the TV way up.]
Chandler: Ahh, come on! Yknow whatyknow what, I think Im just gonna go home and call Kathy.
Kathy: (interrupting) Oh, it looks great!
Chandler: Yeah, I mean when you were late last night, Kathy and I got to talking, and one thing to another and
Chandler: (entering in a bathrobe) I just walked in the bathroom and saw Kathy naked! It was like torture!
Kathy: Yeah, I do. Of course, I learned at my aunts dog grooming shop, but hey, what do you say?
Chandler: All right, who keeps leaving old newspapers in the trash?! I really wanted to take Kathy to this, I cant believe I missed it.
Chandler: It's okay, the duck's using our bathroom anyway. (Kathy goes into the bathroom.) Hey Joe! What are you getting Kathy for her birthday?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Kathy are kissing.]
Joey: No, things are fine with Kathy. Im having a late dinner with her tonight, right after my early dinner with Casey.
Kathy: Oh. Well uh, (to Chandler) you not being able to talk may make this easier. Listen umm (She looks at the gang who are watching, they take the hint and leave them alone.) Listen I dont wanna be someone who comes between two best friends. I just, I cant stand seeing what this is doing to you guys, and I dont wanna be the cause of that. So, I dont think we can see each other anymore. Im gonna go to my moms in Chicago, Im gonna stay there for awhile. I think this couldve be something really amazing, but yknow this is probably for the best. Yknow? Im gonna miss you. Good-bye, Chandler.
Kathy: (outside the door) No. (Chandler opens the door and they kiss again.)
Kathy: Umm, (moves her hands down to his butt) I love this touchy. Can I take it to work with me?
Chandler: Okay, all right. I just spent the entire afternoon looking for a present for Kathy that would be better than the rabbit.
Chandler: (to Kathy) Uhh, that was Joey. Hes running a little late, he says hes sorry.
[Scene: A nightclub, Chandler is having dinner with Kathy and Joey.]
Kathy: Horrible!
Kathy: Oh my God, is it really that bad?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, continued from earlier. Chandler and Kathy are still kissing, then they stop suddenly.]
Chandler: Yeah, I mean when you were late last night, Kathy and I got to talking, and one thing to another and
Chandler: No! That was a test! In a couple of hours Im gonna get really drunk and wanna call Kathy and you guys are gonna have to stop me! And then after that, Im gonna get so drunk, Im gonna wanna call Janice
Chandler: Well, thanks. I grow it myself. (Kathy is running her fingers through his hair, and Chandler catches himself enjoying it too much.) Yknow who also has great hair is Joey!
Kathy: Yes! Yeah! Joey has great hair! Umm, Im basically done here. Just let me get this off your neck.
Kathy: (laughs) What about the duck?
Chandler: Oh, yeah. Yeah, I found this great place called "Invisible things for Kathy." (Motions to an imaginary pile of presents next to him.) Can you give me a hand with all this stuff?
Chandler: Kathy! Kathy! Hi!! Kathy! Kathy! (She doesn't hear him and keeps running, Chandler starts chasing her as the theme to The Mod Squad starts to play. First, a car almost hits him and then gets mustard splashed on him as he runs by a hot dog vendor.) Kathy! (He keeps running and gets tangled up in the leashes of five dogs, in desperation he throws his paper.) Fetch! Fetch it! (He frees himself and resumes the chase) Kathy! Kathy! Kathy! (He now trips and falls into a pile of garbage, he tries to get up and scream her name again but he has a piece of spinach in his mouth. He gets out of the garbage and starts crossing the street by running over the hoods of a couple of cabs.) Kathy! (He jumps in front of her and out of breath he says) Kathy.
(Kathy runs in, hair all out of place, and hugs Monica.)
Kathy: Oh! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Yes! Thank you! (Runs back to Chandler)
Joey: (entering) Hey! I'm meeting Kathy in ten minutes! I've been looking all over for you!
Kathy: Hi.
Chandler: (sees Kathy is up watching TV) Hi!
Kathy: You're kidding! Oh, I love him.
Kathy: (laughs) Oh-oh-oh-oh!
Kathy: Oh please!
Kathy: (to Chandler) We were just talking about you.
(Joey and Kathy enter, laughing)
Kathy: Not your type?! She's gorgeous!
Chandler: Its-its about Kathy. Umm, uh, I like her. I like her a lot actually.
Kathy: With a K.
Kathy: No, you didn't. Hi, I'm Kathy.
Kathy: Wow! You are really good at this.
Kathy: Oh my God!
Phoebe: Yes, you do. Chandler loves Kathy.
Kathy: Hey!
Joey: Yeah! You don't like Kathy.
Kathy: Okay.
Monica: Y'know what, I like Kathy.
Kathy: Um, thank you for the gift.
Kathy: Thank you!
Kathy: I'll be in in a minute.
[Kathy enters]
Kathy: So is Joey around?
Kathy: Hey.
Kathy: Well....
Chandler: Wait! Youre going out with Kathy!
Kathy: Looks good.
Kathy: Oh, okay.
Kathy: Okay. Bye.
Kathy: So what did you do today?
Kathy: Can you really do that?
Kathy: No, but thats bad!
Kathy: What?!
Kathy: Oh.
Kathy: Chandler, I like Joey a lot, but with you
Joey: No-no-no, I think Im gonna see how things go with Kathy. Shes pretty cool.
Joey: No. No, Kathy.
Joey: No-no, Kathy.
Kathy: Oh, jeez. (Hits him)
Chandler: I kissed Kathy.
Kathy: Oh.
Kathy: Well, Im still sorry. Is he here?
Kathy: Hey. Listen, I want you to know how sorry I am
Kathy: I uh, dont really have a preference. You?
Kathy: Im sorry. If you wanna pretend that nothing happened, I can try.