words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey, Monica, and Phoebe are there as Chandler enters.]
Phoebe: Hey! Check it out! This is unbelievable! Joey has been holding his breath for almost four minutes!
(We see Joey who has puffed up his cheeks and Chandler nonchalantly reaches down and pinches Joeys nose shut. In a few seconds, Joey has to move because hes now forced to actually hold his breath.)
Joey: (To Chandler) Dude! What are yoyou trying to kill me?!
Joey: Hey, what is with the secrecy Phoebe? Huh? And what about this Denise, is she cute?
Joey: Hey Rach, listen I was thinkin uh, Im gonna have an extra room over at my place
Joey: Yeah, why dont you move in with me? Itll be great! We could stay up late, watch movies, and you know about Naked Thursdays right?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica are there as Joey enters.]
Joey: Hey! (To Chandler) Dude, some guy just called for you.
Joey: I dont know! How about, "Thanks for taking the message." Jeez! (Exits.)
Joey: Hey, whats up?
Joey: But youre still moving in together, right? Because my ad came out today. (Shows him the paper.)
Joey: Yeah? I just figured yknow, after living with you itd be an interesting change of pace to have a female roommate, yknow? Someone I can learn from, someone-someone whos different than me. And whats more different than me; a guy whos not 19 than say a girl who is 19? Enh? (Points to his head.) Not just a hat rack my friend!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is interviewing a potential roommate. And yes, shes a female, non-smoker and very non-ugly.]
Joey: (exiting from Chandlers room with the new roommate) Everything on your application looks really goodOhh! Just one last question umm, are you and your friends gonna be over here all the time like partying and hanging out?
Joey: Whoa!! Now look, dont be just blurtin stuff out. I want you to really think about your answers. Okay?
Joey: Oh dont listen to him, hes just some guy who really wants the apartment, but I dont think hes gonna get it.
Joey: That thing was a hazard! (To the potential roommate) Im very safety conscious.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is singing a new song. Yep, the first new Phoebe song of season six, Ross, Joey, and Rachel are also there.]
Joey: Umm, listen, Ross do you really think this moving in with Rachel is a good idea?
Joey: Yeah well, maybe you should go back! Okay? Rachel moves in, and before you know it youre right where you dont want to be! Back together!
Joey: Thats not gonna work out! Then shes gonna come home all weepy and youll be tellin her, "Oh thats okay. Youll find someone." And then, bamn! She finds you!
Joey: I am telling you Ross, she is definitely gonna fall in love with you again! Now, is that what you want?
Joey: Here she comes. Hold on, Im gonna make your life much easier.
Joey: Or not. Uh, Rach, why dont you just move in with me? (Rachel sighs.)
Ross: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa, Joey!
Joey: No-no-no-no-no-no-no-no Its okay, I mean Ilook Rach, I know I scared you off with that whole Naked Thursdays thing, but we dont have to do that!
Joey: Thursdays clearly not good for ya, pick a day!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey has The Potential Roommate back for another interview.]
Joey: (opening the door to The Potential Roommate) Hi!
Joey: Come in. Thanks for comin back, umm, okay there have been a lot of people interested in the room, but I have narrowed it down and you are one of the finalists!
Joey: Okay now, before I make my final decision I uh, I just want to make sure our personalities match. Okay, so I made up a little test. Now, Im gonna say a word and then you say the first thing that comes to mind.
Joey: Okay! Here we go. Pillow.
Joey: Very good! Okay. G.
Joey: Excellent! Okay umm, doggy.
Joey: Ooh, sorry! No-no-no, so close though, butbye-bye! (He ushers her out the door.)
Joey: What did they do?
Joey: Hey-hey, Ross?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Joey is making marinara sauce and filling every container in sight. Chandler enters.]
Joey: Oh God. Uh, okay, heres the thing, this is the thing, okay, the thing is...
(Joey fakes a scream.)
Joey: They were in his office.
Joey: Whoa, ah!! Were you just gonna give me some lemonade?
Joey: Im telling you man, I saw it.
JOEY: Hey, is that when you wrote salt water taffy man?
(They all cheer and Rachel, Ross and Phoebe join in for a group hug. Joey also joins, but he stands back a bit, because he is all sticky of the food on him)
Joey: Cute! This is Janice! You remember Janice?
JOEY: That was a good one. For a second there, I was like, "whoa."
Chandler: Joey told me, he saw you two kissing.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are there.]
Joey: You said number two.
Joey: Uh.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Joey, Phoebe, and Chandler are looking through Monica's high school yearbook]
Joey: I know. (giggles harder)
Joey: Well, now we got a reason.
Joey: Hey uh, whats a matter?
Tour Guide: Maybe its crazy in a perfect world, a world without lab coats and blazers, but you not in a perfect world, you in a museum now. See that scientist in the classes, he and I used to play together all the time in grade school, but now (Turns around) Peter! Hey, Peter! Its me Rhonda! From PS-129! I shared my puddin which you man! I gave you my Snack Pack! (to Joey) See, he pretend he dont even here me!
Joey: What are you ah, what are you gonna do?
Joey: Yeah, she said you looked like Ingrid Bergman that day.
(Chandler and Monica enter from their room and Joey quickly hides the bag of potato chips behind his back.)
Joey: Hey-hey, Im not judging.
Erin: Okay. (Joey goes to get some coffee and Erin sits down.)
Joey: Just because she went to Yale drama, she thinks shes like the greatest actress since, since, sliced bread!
JOEY: Uh, uh, we'll flip for it. Ducks or clowns.
Katie: Oh, thanks! That's so sweet! (She punches Rachel like she punched Joey.)
Joey: Okay, retract the device, retract the device.
Joey: Hey, thats never gonna make it all the way over here, buddy!
[Scene: Classroom, Joey is lecturing on facial expressions.]
[Scene: Back at the restroom at Marcel's. Chandler is still in the stall, Joey comes in to go to the bathroom.]
(Joey turns around and sees his face on a poster in the subway. The poster says: What Mario isn't telling you...V.D., you never know who might have it. A variety of scenes are shown with the poster displayed all over New York City.)
Joey: Ive got a science question.
Joey: Says who? Your mom?
[Scene: Joey is at the cab driver interview.]
Joey: So did that do anything for ya?
Joey: (entering) G. I. Joe! Cool! Can I play?
Monica: (to Chandler and Joey) I won the game.
Rachel, Chandler, and Joey: What?
Joey: Thank you.
Joey: Wow! That was good. That was...(points to his pocket) Tweezers?
Joey: (on the tape) I'm comin' out! (He opens the door and hops out pointing the gun in all directions and then runs out of view.)
(Joey leaves for his bedroom, and Rachel grins. She then takes Gladys and enters Monica's apartment.)
JOEY: I don't know, you see somethin', you hear a word, I thought that's what it was. Let me see it again.
Joey: Mar-klan.
JOEY: Yep, this kiss thing is defiantly a problem, Mr. Beatty wants to see it again on Monday. Man, I gotta figure out what I'm doing wrong. Oh, okay, one of you girls come over here and kiss me.
Joey: Yeah! Wow, your like from a whole other country.
Joey: I think so.
Joey: Well uh, I wanted to have a few beers, but uh, I got rid of those because Rachel couldnt stand the smell of them. But I have thrown back a lot of orange juice with calcium though. And uh, its a couple weeks past its expiration date, so its got a bit of a kick.
JOEY: The Ice Capades?
Joey: What the hells the matter with you?! This is my favourite jersey.
Joey: Pheebs, run!
Joey: After!!
Joey: No. Y'know how were always saying we need a place for the mail.
PHOEBE: Ok, ok, ok. Ooh, hey 'new doc on the block, Days of Our Lives' Joey Tribbiani.' Ooh, cool picture.
Monica and Joey: One-Mississippi. Two-Mississippi. Three-Mississippi.
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey and the girls are sitting at the couches.]
Joey: What are you gonna do?
Joey: Okay.
Joey: Here you go!
(Joey throws the ball to Chandler)
Joey: Look, Pheebs, I just, I wanna apologize for, for saying that your method was stupid and-and maybe ask you to be my teacher again. And-and I promise, I won't touch a guitar until you say I'm ready. (After a short pause she hands him her guitar.) You really think I'm ready?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Monica are eating breakfast as Joey enters, very happily.]
Ross: Fine, fine, Rachel your with Monica, Joey youre with me.
Joey: Id seen this thing on The Discovery Channel...
Chandler: And for the last time, we do not want to be friends with you! And we don't want to buy your bat! (Joey lowers his bat)
Joey: Hey, it's me! I'm comin' in!
Joey: Whoa, whoa, no, no, I-Im not playing with this guy, now.
Margha: Im sorry, Joey, that is my chose.
Joey: Wait a minute! Wait a minute! She obviously didnt understand the question.
Chandler and Joey: What are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing?
Joey: This is great, this is great, what else, what else?
Joey: Nice going. You just saved yourself a couple months of sex.
Joey: This sucks, I was just up by that much!
(Joey steps in a picks up the paper, the gang all look at him.)
Joey: (looking at the timer) Thirty seconds left on the timer!
Joey: Yeah, they said I acted too much with it. I told everybody about this! Now everybody's gonna go to the theatre, expecting to see me, and...
Joey: Are you kiddin? Phoebe lived on the street. Okay? Plus, shes got this crazy temper. SheShes not standing right behind me is she?
JOEY: Woah, dude, burn.
Phoebe: Hey, buddy. Hows my favorite dog, huh? Hows my favorite dog? (the dog doesnt move) Youre subdued. (to Joey) Did you give him a beer?
Joey: Fumble!
Joey: What? Me having a job?
Joey: Excellent! Excellent! And uh, finally, are you into any weird stuff yknow, sexually?
Joey: Oh yeah.
Joey: Hey. What, what are you doing here?
Joey: Sure.
Joey: All right.
Joey: Hey listen, so whens-whens my audition? I mean I know its Thursday, but what time?
Phoebe: (walking up to Joey) Hey.
Joey: Set....hike!
Joey: Look Rach, wasnt this supposed to a temporary thing? I thought you wanted to do fashion stuff?
Joey: No! Its not okay! Its not okay at all!! Youre dead inside!!
Joey: This sucks! I didnt know I had to stay up all night before I went to this stupid sleep clinic! Im so tired!
(Chandler and Joey both laugh)
Joey: Youre smoking again?!
[Scene: Joey work, Joey is showing a guy a tree.]
Joey: Look, I don't hate Janice, she's-she's just a lot to take, you know.
Chandler: Run, Joey! Run for your life! (runs out)