words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are sitting on the couch reading.]
Joey: Can I see the comics?
Joey: Okay, may I see the comics?
Joey: Yeah, you shoulda been there last night.
Joey: Well Ross was hangin out over at our place, Rachel comes over to borrow some moisturiser from Chandler....
Joey: Anyway! Her and Ross just started yelling at each other.
Joey: Well, I guess he says that because they were on a break when it happened, that she should of forgiven him by now.
Joey: I had the same dream!
Joey: Oh, I had the opposite dream.
Joey: Yeah, I mean its never taken me a week to get over a relationship.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, the whole gang is there, except for Ross and Rachel. Joey is trying to eat Chinese with chopsticks and fails miserably. Theres a knock on the door, and Chandler answers it to reveal Rachel]
Joey: Rach, its, its ah, its not that we dont want to, really. (quietly) Are we talking models in their underwear?
Joey: (He turns around to Chandler looking for approval to go with Rachel, Chandler mouths Come on!) (turning back to Rachel) Ross, did ask us first, and we set that night aside.
Joey: Oh yeah.
Joey: Youre smoking again?!
Joey: (obviously cold) Hey, can you close that window Chandler? My nipples can cut glass over here!
Joey: Itll be great for next weekend.
Joey: Itll be great for next weekend. I mean, (in an Irish accent) itll be grrreat.
Joey: Uh, Pheebs we kinda need you to drive us all up there in your grandmothers cab, but y'know what, Ill stay.
[Scene: In Phoebes Grandmothers cab, driving up to the cabin. Phoebes driving, Rachels sitting shotgun, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are in the back seat.]
Joey: (to Chandler and Monica) Hey, does anybody else feel bad about Ross?
Chandler: (to Joey) Well hes probably mad after you called him this morning to borrow his goggles.
Joey: What? Mine arent tinted.
Joey: Oh, now I have to go!!
[Both Chandler and Joey put their feet up against the glass, Monica doesnt and gets thrown up against the glass.]
[Joey gets out and sprints to the bathroom and Chandler follows with a cigarette in his hands.]
Joey: Whats going on?
Chandler: (to Joey) My lighters in there! (points to the cab)
Joey: Relax okay, I-I-I can get this open. Anybody have a coat hanger?
Joey: Look, I just need a wire something to jimmy it. Oh hey, one of you guys give me the underwire from your bra!
Joey: Come on! Who has the biggest boobs?
Joey: Whoever has the biggest boobs, has the biggest bra, therefore has the biggest wire.
Joey: If you wanna get back in the car, we need the wire, your call.
Joey: Thank you Phoebe, that is very, very generous.
Joey: (opening the door) And there you go!
Phoebe: Oh good, oh Joey and Chandler are back.
[Joey walks up helping Chandler.]
Joey: Oh yeah, Smokey Joe here got half way to the highway and collapsed.
[Scene: The rest stop, Joey is making a sign.]
Joey: Okay, done.
Joey: Thats help spelled backwards so that the helicopters can read it from the air!
Chandler and Joey: Hey!!
[Ross grabs the gas can he brought along, and walks through Joeys sign destroying it.]
Joey: Arrrghh!!
Joey: Guys, do you think we should ask Ross to come along?
Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey: No, I wasnt gonna ask you that, no.
Joey: I-I cant handle this, you guys.
Monica: What I said was, was that I understood. Joeys the one who agreed with you!
Rachel: Really Joey?
Joey: (pause) What?
Ross: Obviously not to Joey.
[They all turn around and look at Joey.]
Joey: (pause) What?
Ross: (to Rachel) Look both, Joey and Monica feel the same way that I do. No-no-no-no.
Joey: Yeah, and not put us in the middle.
Joey: Oh what, wait, wait a second, I mean, what are we doing? Whos going with who?
Ross: Look, you guys, you guys should go. (Joey tries to say something, but Ross cuts him off.) No, Im, you, you planned this all out, and I dont want to ruin it, so you guys should just go.
Joey: Come on man, you drove all the way up here.
[Joey enters]
(Joey checks that Ross is not looking and dumps it in a plant.)
Joey: Yeah, well, you don't have your racket.
JOEY: Aaaaagggghhhhh.
JOEY: Hey.
Joey: Oh uh, well I just came in for a cup of coffee to go.
JOEY: Eight hundred and twelve bucks.
JOEY: Put it on.
Joey: Hey, best man number two, Joey Tribbiani. Now Im not good with the jokes like Chandler here. Boy...but ahh, I just want to say congratulation to the happy couple. I first met Ross in this coffee house back home...Home...New York City...Where everybody knows my name. Well anyway, I love you guys. (pointing at everyone.) But not as much as I love America. (Looking at Chandler.) Could we please..go home now?
Joey: Barmifsaed?
Joey: (smiling) I'm in it.
JOEY: Heh, what d'ya say?
Janine: (entering from her room) Monica! Chandler! Im really-really sorry about tonight. I dont know if Joey told you; I just couldnt get out of going to this play. Im sorry. Have a great time.
Rachel: Perfect. Fasten your seatbelts, it's peepee time. (She goes into Joey and Chandler's apartment, where Mr. Tribbiani is reading the paper) Hey, Mr. Trib.
Joey: No. (Pause) wait a minute what was the little mermaid?
Charlie: I guess. There was hum... (she breathes deeply) there was another reason that I thought it was time to end it with Joey. I started to realize that I was having feelings for someone (pause) else.
(Joey whispers in Rachels ear to confirm his response.)
Joey: What's he doin' in my section?
Rachel: Dont just say yes! This isnt a game, Joey you can really get hurt out here. Okay, so do you want to pay attention or do you want to die?!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone except Joey and Chandler are there eating breakfast.]
Joey: (walking towards her to hold her and support her) Monica, you understand what we are saying, right?
JOEY: If you hated the bracelet so much, Chandler, you should have just said so.
Joey: (squinting his eyes) Are you kiddin'? I think I just saw a bat in the corner!
The Interviewer: (returning) So, as Joeys friends, is there anything that you guys think our readers ought to know?
[Scene: Terrys office, Joey has come to beg for a second chance.]
JOEY: Aaaaagggghhhhh. Mommy
Joey: (sipping red wine from a glass) Who says that wine has to cost more than milk!
JOEY: Hey.
JOEY: Get out.
JOEY: How come you have two?
JOEY: [pulls out a VCR tape] Hey Monica, what's on this video tape?
JOEY: What is with your nose?
JOEY: Some girl ate Monica.
Joey: All right, dont waste it, I mean its still food. (He picks it up and eats it.)
Rachel: All right, look. Why don't you just return the book, let Joey give her the clock pen, and you give her something worse than that. Like... a regular pen.
Joey: You guys, this is Shelley, shes interviewing me for Soap Opera Digest, and Shelley, this are my friends
JOEY: I know.
JOEY: Uh-huh.
MR A: [to Joey] Worth a shot, huh?
JOEY: Huh? Days of our Lives picked up my option.
JOEY: [sits down] Ohh yeah, that's the stuff.
Joey: If he goes first he can!
Chandler: Where did you, when did you, how did you... (Joey hits the back of Chandler's head) How did you get a girl like that?
Ross: (Pause) Of course I am! (Joey is relieved) Okay, let's go godfather.
JOEY: I'm excited! I've never gotten reviewed before.
JOEY: What if we have to pee?
Janine: Joey, its Anne Geddes. Shes a famous artist.
JOEY: We dare.
Joey: All right, all right, all right. (Starts to leave, stops, and turns around) I mean Ill have to check with him first, but Ill think hell be cool with it. (Monica shoos him out.)
JOEY: Hi.
JOEY: She laughed at you?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is seated, and the apartment is filled with baskets of fruit. Joey enters, check in hand.]
CHANDLER and JOEY: Hey.
CHANDLER and JOEY: Hey.
JOEY: What're you doin' here? Aren't you supposed to be out with Rachel?
Chandler: My chair. Now, if anybody asks, your name is Rosita! (He runs out the door, grabs the back of Rosita, and we can hear Joey and Rachel talking as they are coming up the stairs. Neither of them have reached the landing yet.)
Joey: But Rachel has an apartment.
Joey: " by doin it."
CHANDLER, JOEY, and PHOEBE: Hey.
JOEY: No, inside good, outside bad.
Joey: Oh well, theyre killing off one of the characters on the show, and when she dies her brain is being transplanted into my body.
Joey: "Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in!"
Joey: Hey Mr. and Mrs. Geller! Let me help you with that.
[Scene: An Emergency Room, Chandler and Joey are leading Ross in.]
Joey: (grabs the window from the outside and sticks his head in) (whispering) When is she leaving?
Joey: Okay. (He grabs a jelly donut, takes a bite, and guess what he spills all over himself. He tries to clean it up and smears it all over the shirt.)
Joey: Well, he's gonna. I'll see you a little later, ok? (To the Hombre Man) Hey, how ya doin'?
CHANDLER: Monica, will you stop? This is nuts. Do you know how long it's gonna be before you actually have to deal with this problem? I mean, you don't even have a boyfriend yet. Joey, she does not look fat.
Joey: What can I do? Look, I don't want to do anything to screw it up with Ursula.
JOEY: What?
JOEY: Yeah, so.
Joey: Well, ah, Im an actor. Im fairly neat. I ah, I got my own TV. Oh, and dont worry Im totally okay with the gay thing.
JOEY: Hey.
Joey: Thats right! Cause Im a Tribbiani! (To Rachel) And this is what we do! I mean we may not be great thinkers or world leaders, we dont read a lot or run very fast, but damnit! We can eat!
JOEY: So where you gettin' it?
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
Joey: You were right before. I mean, friends are so important.
JOEY: All right, all right. "Damnit Braverman, it's right there on the chart!"
JOEY: Yeah, can you see me in a place like this?
JOEY: Huh?
JOEY: Can you believe this place?
Joey: I wish. See, I guess another thing I probably shouldve told you about Ginger is that she kinda has a ah, artificial leg.
Joey: No, no, no, no! Hes fine! Look, look, look! (picks up the ball) Heres your ball! Get your ball! Get your ball! (he throws the ball and it bounces right next to the dog) Get your ball! My God, what have I done to you, huh? I broke the dog! Pheebs, I broke the dog!
Joey: Later! (He runs away down the hall and hides behind a corner to a whole other corridor.) Oh man! (Walks down the hallway in desperation.) Hot girl! Hot girl!!
JOEY: Uhhh, I don't think you're gonna like this.
[Phoebe runs over the curb. Joey gets in the back seat, Chandler in the front]
Joey: I can't believe I'm hearing this!
Man: Hey Joey, hi! Im Ray; Im the producer of the show.
Joey: Well okay, so then youre fine. The rule is when two actors are actually doing it off-stage all the sexual tension between them is gone. Okay? So as long as its hot onstage you got nothing to worry about. Its when the heat goes away, thats when youre in trouble.
JOEY: Well that's how I feel.
Joey: Yeah. It's actually our first official date
JOEY: Well then maybe I will.
(The apartment manager hung up on him and he hangs up the phone and throws in on the chair. Joey motions, "What the hell was that?" Chandler makes a face to say, "Think about it." Joey tries to divide 136 by 13; he's confused. Suddenly, light dawns on yonder dunder head. He gets it.)
Chandler: All right Joey, be nice. So does he have a hump? A hump and a hairpiece?
JOEY: Hey.
JOEY: I know. Yeah.
JOEY: Well, that was only 'cause I used the red one to unclog the drain.
JOEY: No, we're alright.
JOEY: Hey listen, I'm sorry about what happened. . .
Joey: Come on you guys, come on please-please just give her another chance, huh? Shell come around I promise.