words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Joey and Chandler enter with Chandler covering his eyes and Joey leading him.]
JOEY: Alright, no peeking. No peeking, no peeking, no peeking.
JOEY: Alright open your eyes. [opens his eyes to see two black leather recliners and a big screen TV]
JOEY: Huh? Days of our Lives picked up my option.
JOEY: I know.
JOEY: Uh-huh.
JOEY: Whichever one you want, man. Whichever one you want. [Chandler starts to sit in one of the chairs] Not that one.
JOEY: [sits down] Ohh yeah, that's the stuff.
JOEY: We dare.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Joey are sitting in their recliners watching TV. Monica, Ross, and Phoebe are there.]
CHANDLER and JOEY: Woah, hey, yo. [Rachel and Ross move]
CHANDLER and JOEY: Hey, yo. [they move from out of in front of the TV]
JOEY: What if we have to pee?
JOEY: Wow, look at that. The car is on fire, yet somehow it's expensive paint job is protected by the Miracle Wax.
CHANDLER: You got a Cheeto on your face man.[Joey removes the Cheeto and eats it]
JOEY: Hi.
CHANDLER and JOEY: Hey.
JOEY: What're you doin' here? Aren't you supposed to be out with Rachel?
JOEY: She laughed at you?
JOEY: It certainly is a miracle.
CHANDLER and JOEY: Hey.
CHANDLER and JOEY: Hey, woah, hey, woah.
JOEY: No, inside good, outside bad.
CHANDLER, JOEY, and PHOEBE: Hey.
CHANDLER, JOEY, and PHOEBE: Goodnight.
JOEY: [uses a dentist mirror to see] Naa, she's lyin'.
ROSS: I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight. RACHEL: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight. [they kiss] ROSS: You're not laughing. RACHEL: This time it's not so funny. [They kiss and start undressing. As Rachel tries to pull off Ross's tie she catches it in his mouth. Then they roll across the fur rug.] RACHEL: Ah, oh God. Oh, honey, oh that's OK. ROSS: What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box. RACHEL: Oh, thank God. [Scene: Museum of Natural History. The next morning Rachel and Ross are sleeping in the display under a fur.] ROSS: Hi. RACHEL: Hi you. I can't believe I'm waking up next to you. ROSS: I know it is pretty unbelievaaaaah. RACHEL: What? ROSS: We're not alone. [A church youth group is outside the display watching them] CLOSING CREDITS [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are still in their chairs, watching Beavis and Butthead.] [they're laughing along with the show when an alarm goes off] JOEY: Is that the fire alarm? CHANDLER: Yeah. [feels the floor] Oh it's not warm yet, we still have time. JOEY: Cool.
Joey: What party?
Phoebe: We know about your party Joey.
Lauren: Oh, yeah! I-I ran into you in the hallway in your building. It was right after I slept with Joey. He dumped me the next day.
Joey: (looks perplexed and opens up his robe) Ok... I mean...
Joeys Date: Sorry about that, but I couldnt get that lock to work on the door.
Joey: Yeah, I want my tickets too (takes the bowl from Rachel)! And I'm buying the Knicks! And Steffi Graff, ah ah!
Joey: You don't know how long we're gonna be in here! We may have to repopulate the Earth.
Joey: It's a science.
[Scene: The roof, Joey is walking towards Ross with a guy]
Joey: Monica!
Joey: (To Rachel) What have you got there?
(Joey, resigned, walks to Rachel's table)
Joey: Name? (Ross looks at him.) I know Ross but whats it short for? You know like, like Rossel or Rosstepher.
Rachel: Joey, you're so sweet.
Joey: Me.
Rachel: Oh, Very funny... Joey.
Joey: Gotcha.
Joey: Yes, 'cause we live together, that's a joke!
(Joey enters, wearing a bathrobe)
(Joey motions for Rachel to lean in. She does so.)
Monica: Phoebe, you got Joey drums to annoy Rachel, so she wouldn't wanna live there anymore?
Joey: Good call. Yeah. But, the face Ross, the face isnt Rachel.
Rachel: I could, I could but I don't want to! I want to kiss Joey!
Rachel: I just wanted to let you know I've changed my mind: I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna kiss Joey.
(Rachel goes look for Joey. She sees him and Charlie kissing passionately.)
Joey: Hey!
(Joey and Charlie enter. Ross looks at her)
Joey: Fine ... mediocre porn
Chandler: (to Joey) So, a professor, uh?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment]
Joey: (voice strained) Couldn't have this conversation down at the truck huh?
JOEY: Uhh, I'm guessing the threshold's clear now.
(somebody knocks the door, Joey opens and it's Charlie)
Joey: Come on in, how are ya?
Joey: I know, yeah!
Joey: Can I offer you a drink?
Joey: (looking puzzled and nodding) Ok!
Joey: Yeah, definitely, definitely. Ok, what do you wanna see first?
Ross: Thats true, thanks dad. (To All) People should be dancing! Huh? Hey, this is a party! Come on! Joey, dance!! (He starts to dance but stops when no one else joins him.)
Joey: Which one, they all suck!
Joey: (looking puzzled) I don't think so.
Joey: Ross!
Phoebe: Its Joey! (Joey turns and looks at her and she mouths I love you to him.)
(Joey walks in and moves towards Ross, who's sitting of the sofa)
Joey: (checking) EH, what do you know!
Joey: Yeah, I'm... I'm kind of having a little problem.
Joey: I need to talk to you about Charlie.
Joey: No, look, you know Charlie, right? She's cool, she's funny, her body is soo...
Joey: Thanks.
Joey: The Metsss!
Joey: Ok, all right, so I'll take her to the MET.
Joey: You got to tell me exactly what to do there.
Joey: Geez, sounds like you should be going on this date!
Joey: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Slow down, you go way too fast. Ok? Just go back to the MET, ok?
Joey: An annulment? Ross! I dont think surgerys the answer here.
Joey: Phonetically? (Looks confused)
Joey: (lifts Rachel up and moves her behind him so she can walk on) Hey, here you go.
Joey: (shaking his head as if to say: of course not!) No, no, my mouth says the words, my brain is thinking monster trucks!
Joey: Ok.
Rachel: Ah! Well it was Joey reading Drake's lines in the dream...
Joey: Come on! you... (reaches out to touch the imaginary painting again)
Joey: Well to tell you the truth, they uh, (Pause) they had a problem with the bag!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is drinking a gallon of orange juice as Chandler enters.]
Rachel: Well, you know what? This is great. Finally, I have someone I can pass on my wisdom too. Let me tell you about a couple of things I learned while working at the coffeehouse. First of all, the customer is always right. (Joey nods.) A smile goes a long way. (Joey smiles) And if anyone is ever rude to you? Sneeze muffin.
Joey: Absolutely! Halloween is the worst. Except for Christmas and their birthdays. Kinda get a little crazy during the summer too. And anytime theyre hungry or sleepy. Yknow, kids are tough. Good luck with that. (Walks away.)
Ross: Yeah? Joey really knows his art, huh?
Joey: Dont start doing that. You cant do that Rach, cause then youre gonna make me do that. (Starts to cry.) Oh, here we go! (Sits down next to her.)
JOEY: Ohh, you know what it is? It's smudgy 'cause they're fax pages. Now when I was on Days of Our Lives as Dr. Drake Remoray, they'd send over the whole script on real paper and everything.
(Joey walks in)
Joey: (to Charlie) You're ready?
Joey: Hey!
Ross: Yeah well, he's not gonna get this one. Ben is way cuter than that kid. I mean look at him, look at you, (Starts to whine like a baby and Joey just glares at him.)
Charlie: Yeah, let's go. (stands up and kisses Joey) (to Ross) Thanks Ross.
Joey: (aside, to Ross) Hey Ross! That art stuff worked, you hooked me up.
Joey: Oh hey Rach!
Joey: So you need someone who knows fashion, to tell you what looks good.
[Scene: Central Perk. Charlie, Joey and Rachel are on the couches]
Joey: What's the matter, Pheebs?
Joey: Maybe you could take Charlie shopping.
Joey: No-no! I used to get paid for all kinds of medical stuff, remember? Lets see uh, well I dont want to donate sperm again. (To Ross) I really prefer doing that at the home office yknow? (Ross nods his head.) Ooh-ooh, maybe they want like some of my blood or-or spit or something, huh?
Joey: Hey-hey-hey, if my friend says its time to go, its time to go. (Starts to leave, but comes back for his cookies.)
Joey: Noooo... Three Blind Mice goes like this... (he puts his fingers in position on the recorder)
Joey: (looking at the checkbook) Wow! Look at this! He wrote a check for 50,000 dollars to Hugo Ligrens Ring Design. (Monica is stunned) Oh, sorry, what do you think the good news is?
Joey: Oh, ain't that nice? The three of you trying on slutty lingerie together.
(Joey stares around dumbly looking for the "talking pigeon")
Joey: (to Charlie) Alright, have a good time. (they kiss)
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey and Charlie on the couch. Rachel enters]
Joey: Bye.
Joey: Just... seeing what it'd be like to be a paleontologist... it's fun, yeah!
Joey: So you're ruling out surrogacy?
Joey: So, I don't have to learn what that means?
Chandler: (stopping Joey) ah-ha!
(Joey moves close to Ross and whispers something in his ear)
Joey: (talking to a pineapple in his hand) God, you're beautiful...why are we fighting this?You know you want it to happen as much as I do.
Phoebe: You like Joey?
Joey: Shh. Shh. Dont try to talk, well get you up to your room, well soak your feet, youll be okay.
Chandler: So you might say, the ring is irreplaceable? (Gives Joey a little squeeze.)
Joey: Hello?
Joey: Yeah, yeah, in honor of their 35th wedding anniversary, I had a star named after them.
Ross: Joey! Hey, I need to talk to Charlie. Is she there?