words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
Joey: (To Rachel) Do you think he saw us or can we still sneak out?
Joey: Oh! Hey Rach, listen umm
Joey: I got a big date coming up, do you know a good restaurant?
Joey: Ooh, great! Thanks!
Joey: You sure are naming a lot of ways to postpone sex, Ill tell ya
Joey: Hey, yknow what?
Joey: Why dont I take you out?
Rachel: What?! Joey, you dont want to go on a date with a pregnant lady.
Joey: Yes I do! And were gonna go out, were gonna have a good time, and take your mind off of childbirth and c-sections and-and giant baby heads stretching out
Joey: Ill be fun.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is getting ready for her date with Joey as there is a knock on the door.]
Rachel: Joey? Could you get that? (There is no answer and she goes and opens the door to Joey.) What are you doing here? I thought you were in your room?
Joey: No, Im picking you up for our date. These are for you. (Hands her some flowers.)
Rachel: Ohh, Lilies. Joey, theyre my favorite. Thank you.
Joey: And, a brownie! (Hands her a bag with the brownie in it.) Well, half a brownie. Actually, its just bag. Its been a long walk from the flower shop and I was startin to feel faint so
Joey: Hey come on now, this is a real date. Uh, so nice place you got here. Foosball, huh? Pizza box. Oh, a subscription to Playboy, my kind of woman.
Joey: I would like to meet him. He sounds like a stand up guy.
Joey: Ah Hey, so this roommate of yours is he good looking?
Joey: Oh yeah, it must be tough to keep your hands of him, huh?
Joey: No-no-no-no, hes not! No! Why are you trying to ruin the game? Come on!
[Scene: A Restaurant, a waitress is taking Joey and Rachels dinner order.]
Joey: Yknow what? Bring her both, and Ill have the same. (The waitress leaves.)
Joey: Oh whoa-whoa-whoa, no roommate stuff. Okay? Were on a date.
Rachel: Okay. Wow! So I get to see what Joey Tribbiani is like on a date. So do you have any moves?
Joey: No! No. Umm, just myself and if they dont like me for(Laughs.) Im sorry I couldnt even get through that.
Joey: Oh alright. Umm, well, okay, I usually start by having a bottle of wine sent to my table from a fan.
Joey: Well it does when you combine it with, "This is so embarrassing, I just want to have a normal life!"
Joey: Oh okay, how about this one. I was gonna wait until the end of the night to kiss you, but youre so beautiful I dont think I can.
Joey: Alright, so so tell me one of your moves.
Joey: Thats your move? Boy Rach, youre lucky youre hot.
Joey: (exasperated) Queens.
Joey: Yeah, with my mom. Yeah, not so much with my dad.
Joey: I dont know. I guess theres just always been this distance yknowI mean we both try to pretend its not there, but it is.
Joey: Yeah, it is. Its really tough. Yknow sometimes I thinkWow!! Nice move!
Joey: "Whered you grow up," its so simple!
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Yes I am! Again so simple!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Rachel are returning from their date.]
Joey: Oh come on! Just pick one! Between Monica, Phoebe, Chandler, and Ross if you had to, if you had to, who would you punch?
Joey: Chandler?
Joey: Me too! Hey Rach, can I just say I think this is the best date I ever had!
Joey: I never laughed so hardDid you see the wine come out of my nose?
Rachel: Joey, I think everyone saw the wine come out of your nose.
Joey: I gotta say, I never knew I could enjoy the non-sex part of the date so much.
Joey: Huh. Huh.
Joey: Ah! Okay, well then you dont judge me. Im gonna suck on the cellophane from the brownie I had before. (They both do as they planned.)
Rachel: So tell me, what are Joey Tribbianis end of the night moves?
Joey: Ah, well, if I want the girl to kiss me, first thing I do is make my lips look irresistible.
Joey: Now you cant tell anyone, but uh I put on shiny lip balm.
Joey: Yeah, like a moth to a flame, Im telling ya. Okay all right, so now you go.
Joey: Why not?
Joey: More embarrassing than shiny raspberry lip balm?! (Rachel just looks at him.) I didnt say raspberry before did I? All right just-just tell me Rach, just tell me!
Joey: (stunned and turned on) Yeah. WhyYeah, that would work for ya
Joey: Oh. (She kisses him.) Yeah. (She goes into her room.) Me to. (He then starts to freak out.)
Ross: Besides, I-I think I figured out a much faster route, Im sure I can make it this time. I just I just cant be afraid to get a little bit hit by cars. (He goes to the bathroom as Joey enters.)
Joey: Hey!
Joey: Oh yeah, I still cant believe you havent seen Cujo. What is wrong with you?
Joey: Have you ever tried to sit through Citizen Kane?
Joey: Oh yeah? All right, lets do it tonight.
Joey: Oh right!
Rachel: Hey Joey, can I ask you something?
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Oh my God! You did too? It totally freaked me out, what was that?!
Joey: Oh yeah-yeah, the lobster.
Joey: Yeah me too, all night.
Joey: Yeah well thats because uh I stayed in my room. Yeah, you dont want to look in my hamper.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Joey is on his hot date and theyre not speaking right now.]
Joey: No-no! Im fine. Its just Hey, can I ask you something? Have you ever looked at someone that youve known for a while and then suddenly suddenly see them a different way?
Joey: Yeah. Yeah, that thats exactly it. Youre right. Yeah.
Joey: (deadpan) Ooh! Yeah. So yeah, so you know exactly what Im talking about.
Joey: Oh yeah, sure. (She gets up, walks towards the bathroom, and Joey watches her go.) Ehhh.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is watching Cujo while Joey returns from his date scaring Rachel.]
Joey: (incredulous) Alone?!
Joey: Hey, did you get to the part where theyre trapped in the car and Cujos throwin himself at the windshield?
Joey: Oh uh, it didnt work out.
Joey: Oh uh, okay. Yeah.
Rachel: Yknow, I never thought Id say this about a movie, but I really hope this dog dies. (Joey brings over a stool at sits on it next to Rachel whos in the big chair.) What are you doing over there? Come sit here, you protect me.
Joey: Oh sure, yeah, why not? (Sits on the arm of the chair.)
Joey: All right, I know! I know. Yeah, itll be okay.
Rachel: Oh my God .Whats he gonna do now? I cant watch! (Drags Joey closer to her and cowers into his chest.) Oh. Seriously, how can you watch this? Arent you scared?
Joey: Terrified. (But for a totally different reason.)
JOEY: Plastic spoons. Great.
[Joey enters, his shoes have bells on, which jingle as he walks. He is wearing a long coat.]
Joey: Now hold on a second, fifth floor against that back wall?
Joey: Me too.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is entering. As he closes the door, Joey pokes his head up from a box enclosure built using the 2 chairs.]
Joey: Hey.
(Joey sticks his head out of the shower curtain.)
Joey: (on tape) Oh, Chandler.
JOEY: I fell down an elevator shaft.
Joey: In the woods. No wait-wait, thats the joke answer.
Joey: Wait up! (They both run to the bathroom.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Ross are talking over party plans.]
Joey: Whos seven?
Joey: (on phone) Hey, Pheebs! Its Joey!
Joey: Kinda, but Ive just been having way too much fun.
Rachel: I can not believe he would do that to MonWhoa! (She stops suddenly and slowly turns to point at Joey. Joey is avoiding her eyes.) Joey, do they know that we know?
Joey: What? You ordered pizza without me?!
Joey: Two pizzas?!
Joey: No, I dont think so.
Joey: Hey, Chan, can you help me out here? I promise I'll pay you back.
(They both start speaking Italian to each other, and since I'm not Italian and don't understand one word, we'll move on to the English portion of the show. Not, that I'm English. Not that there's anything wrong with that, it's just that I'm not. Y'know I think I should shut-up now and move on. Anyhoo, she says something about Joey being fat I think based on this line.)
Rachel: Yeah, I cant live with Joey once the baby comes. I dont want my childs first words to be, (in a babys voice) "How you doin?"
Joey: Oh, it was amazing. You know how you always think you're great in bed?
Joey: Look Ross, I am so-so sorry. I-I-I
Joey: I cant hear a word youre saying, my ears are ringing so bad.
Joey: (to Ross) So, er... how did it go with Celia?
JOEY: Hey, whaddya wanna do for dinner?
Joey: Not a problem. And listen, hey! Since you're gonna be here for a while, why don'tI was thinking we uh, put your name on the answering machine.
Joey: Whats in it?
Waiter: Sir? (Looking at Joey.)
Joey: Well, I'm doing this telethon thing on TV and my agent got me a job as co-host!
JOEY: You partied with Hootie and the Blowfish?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey are standing by the kitchen entrance. A waiter comes out.]
Joey: Thats Fergie baby!!
Joey: Now, dont argue with me
Joey: Oh-no, dont try and talk all normal with that thing in your ear.
Joey: Look at that, Charlton Heston eating a liquorice whip!
Joey: Wow, what-what do you think she wants?
Joey: Baby shower. Wow! That sounds sooo like something I dont want to do! Later! (Finally, he makes his exit.)
Joey: Yeah! Well, I think well see if they actually let you play. Huh? I mean they tell you anything you want to hear like-like, "You look 19," and then they just take it away like-like, "No you dont."
Joey: Hello?
Joey: Okay.
Joey: Ohh great!!!
[Scene: Joey enters his hotel room. The phone is ringing.]
Joey: Ahh Pheebs, you know youre still my number one girl.
RACHEL: Oh c'mon Joey, we care about you.
Joey: Right!
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Have you seen Monica?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. All but Joey are present.]
Phoebe: Yeah. But yknow we were thinking about you, yknow we ordered the Joey Special.
Joey: I can't. It's like this chemical thing, you know. Every time she starts laughing, I just wanna (grimaces and tenses up) pull my arm off just so that I can have something to throw at her.
Joey: Hey, Felicity.
Joey: Okay. (They both walk off to watch for Rachel.)
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Oh, yeah.
(Joey comes back into the hallway and starts to pick up a heavy box)
Joey: (entering) No! No! No! No! No! How you doin?! How you doinDamnit Carl! Go wait in the hall! (Goes into the hall.)
Joey: No.
Ross: (annoyed) O-kay... I mean, don't I deserve anything? I mean, a few tears, a cursory hug? (Joey gives Ross a hug) NOT FROM YOU! (Joey lets go)
Joey: Sh-shh-shh! (He motions for her to watch something he has taped.)
Chandler: Yeah, Joey just pressed something on the remote and it just, came on!
Joey: Yeah, but for a one-year-old. What's the point... the other day she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow and the cow says "El-moo"! (Joey starts laughing) Yeah... that's a funny cup!
[Scene: Pier 59 Studios, Joey is in costume and standing at the craft services table. He checks his pockets and finds some prop coins in a pouch, which he replaces with some cookies.]
[The next flashback is from The One Where No One's Ready. Joey is retaliating against Chandler hiding his underwear by wearing a whole bunch of clothes.]
Joey: Ewwwww!! Ew! Ew! Ew!
Joey: Well, that went well. Yeah.
Joey: Dont you ah, dont you wanna ask me any questions?
Rachel: Yeah. So yknow, I have all of these feelings and I dont know what to do about them, because I cant date like a normal person, which is fine because I dont need a relationship, I mean all I really want is one great night. Just sex, yknow? No strings attached, no relationship, just with someone that I feel comfortable with and who knows what hes doing. For just one great night, I mean is that really so hard to find. (Looks at Joey.) So how was your day?
Joey: Fine. Gang up on me! I got you all right where I want you.
Joey: Ahh, the babies miss me?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Chandler, and Phoebe are there. Joey is working.]
(Joey walks up to them.)
Joey: Over the line?! You-youre-youre so far past the line, that you-you cant even see the line! The line is a dot to you!
Joey: (To Chandler) Dude! What are yoyou trying to kill me?!
Terry: Joey Tribbiani! Im surprised your big head could fit through our small halls! (Gets up) I gotta go Joey.
[Scene: Joey and Rachels, Joey is at the counter eating a bowl of Frosted Flakes.]
Joey: You spit on me man! (Wipes his face.)
Joey: Im so worried about him, yknow?
Joey: No you dont, I just saw you go in there with Monica!
(Joey makes a frustrated face and noise and walks away. He knocks on the next door and it's answered by an old man.)
[Scene: Phoebe is in central-perk with Joey telling him what Ross said t her at the beginning.]
(He walks away and Joey does Rosss fist thing. He then enters Richards dressing room, to find Richard cutting his steak with his sword.)
Joey: Can I ask you something?
Joey: Thanks man.
Joey: Hi!
Phoebe: (To Joey) You ate meat! (Joey is shocked) (To Chandler and Monica) You had sex! (Theyre shocked.)
(Joey puts his finger over his mouth to tell Ross to keep quiet. Ginger looks at Monica who looks away and leave.)
Joey: All right, Im gonna go say hi the chick and the duck.
[Scene: Casting Director #3s office, Joey is entering.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Ross, and Chandler are making a pit stop on their party tour.]
Joey: Come on, season tickets! Season tickets, do you know what that means?
Joey: Okay.
Joey: All right!
Joey: (asleep) So why dont you give me your number?
Chandler: For the last time no! Get out! Get out, Joey!
(Joey leaves and Monica comes up for air.)
Joey: Mornin' Pheebs!
(Phoebe and Rachel both pause, look at each other, and go press their breasts against him. Which Joey doesnt mind, of course.)
Joey: Later! (Exits.)