words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone except Rachel is there as Joey gets up and starts putting on his coat.]
Joey: All right, I should get going, big day a work. Yknow Im in a coma? Today, they do this test on me and it turns out Im not brain dead.
Joey: Ah-ah-ah Mr. Smartie Pants, its just not my character thats not brain dead. Hey, so Pheebs, we still on for tonight?
Joey: Ill see you at 8:00.
Phoebe: Okay. (Joey exits.)
Phoebe: Oh, I have dinner plans with Joey. We get together about once a month to discuss the rest of you guys.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Monica, Chandler, Rachel, and Ross are playing Monopoly as Phoebe enters angrily.]
Phoebe: Well, Ill tell you Rachel Karen Green, I had plans with Joey tonight and he left me this note. (Hands it to Rachel.)
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Joey: Oh-Wha-Ho! What are you middle naming me for?! I left you a note!
Joey: Hey, you can cancel plans with friends if there is the possibility for sex!
Joey: Wow! Im so sorry; I had no idea it would bother you this much.
Joey: Okay, can I-can I make it up to you? Huh? Im sorry. (They hug.) How about uh, dinner tomorrow night?! Ill pay for myself!
Joey: The RossIs that back?!! (Chandler motions no.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Joey are there. Joey is reading a newspaper.]
Joey: Awww! Mel Torme died.
Monica: Joey, that papers like a year old!
Joey: Aw! Does that mean the Sam Goodys sale is over?!
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Uh-uh, excuse me, I do have to interrupt on Rosss behalf. I-I think the rule applies here yknow, since she has a chance to get on broad back
Joey: Aww thats nice. Family should be there, huh? This is her wedding, happiest day of her life.
Phoebe: Well, I have plans with Joey tonight.
Phoebe: Or! I should rush through dinner with Joey and I can meet David at 9:00!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Chandler are eating the cheesecake right out of the box.]
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Joey: (seeing what theyre doing) What do you got there?
Joey: Huh? Uh (He starts taking off his pants.)
Chandler: Dude! Dude! (Motions that Joey should pull up his pants.)
Joey: Oh! (Pulls up his pants.) Sorry. Uh, Ive got those plans with Phoebe, why?
Joey: What?! Tonight?!
Joey: After she gave me that big speech?! She goes and makes a date with a guy on the same night she has plans with me? I think shes trying to pull a fast one on Big Daddy!
[Scene: Iridium Restaurant, Phoebe and Joey are looking at the menus as the waiter comes to take their order.]
The Waiter: (To Joey) And for you sir?
Joey: Yeah, this slow roasted salmon, just how slow are we talkin here?
Joey: Ohh, then no. Maybe I should hear those specials again.
Phoebe: Oh Joey, weve heard the specials three times! Okay? Theres prime rib, mahi mahi, and a very special lobster ravioli. (She grabs his menu and hands it to the waiter.)
The Waiter: Actually were out of the lobster ravioli. (Putting Joeys menu under his arm.)
Joey: Oh well, that changes everything! (Grabs his menu and starts looking at it again. The waiter leaves.) Yknow what Pheebs?
Joey: You were right before. I mean, friends are so important.
Joey: Yknow-yknow what I really want?
Joey: Is to have a long, long talk. Yknow? Get Joey out on the open road and really open him up.
Joey: Yes! I will have the lobster ravioli.
Phoebe: God Joey, this is taking forever!
Joey: Whats the rush? What?
Joey: Whoa-whoa, what is it?
Joey: A date?! No, no Pheebs you-you must be mistaken, because I know you wouldnt schedule a date on the same night you have plans with a friend!
Phoebe: Come on Joey, dont make me feel badly about this.
Joey: No, Im gonna!! Thats right! Yeah, you made me feel really guilty about goin out with that girl! Like-like-like I did something terrible to you! And now Pheebs, youre doing the same thing!
Joey: Okay, well my girl from the other night was special. She was a scientist too!
Joey: Well, she graduated from high school!
Joey: Fine!
Joey: Fine!
Joey: (to the waiter) What are you still doin here?! I told you, lobster ravioli!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is eating the cheesecake and Chandler enters and catches her in the act.]
Rachel: Oh, what are you going to do?! Are you gonna go run tell Monica?! Are you gonna tell Joey?! No! Because then you will have to tell them what we did! We are desert stealers! We are living outside the law!
David: Bye Phoebe. (He gets in and the cab drives off. Joey walks up and witnesses that event.)
Phoebe: (seeing him) Okay, nows not the time Joey. All right? You can yell at me tomorrow.
Joey: No! No! No Pheebs, Im not gonna yell at you. I just yknow, started thinking about you and David and I remember how bummed you were the first time he left. And I just Oh Pheebs, come here. (He hugs her.) Are you okay?
Joey: Hey, yknow you could always visit him.
Joey: Anything I can do? Whatever you need.
Joey: I can give it a shot.
(Joey finishes climbing the stairs and sees them. Chandler and Rachel both stop and look up at him. Joey sits down on the step.)
Joey: (pulls out a fork) All right, what are we havin? (Starts digging in.)
Joey: Maybe, maybe we did a good thing, helping Ross get back on his feet!
Joey: Thanks. (The grip walks away.) (Reading the card.) Congratulations on your big break.
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's, Ross is reading what Joey wrote.]
Chandler: And I love the milk! But, Im not gonna some British girl to move in with me! (Realizes that made no sense.) Joey, you say things now.
Joey: No it isnt, I ate that.
(Joey throws a punch and just lightly taps her on the shoulder, Phoebe counters with a jab to the nose.)
Joey: I had to get out of the apartment. Janine is like stretching all over the place. Yknow, everywhere I look shes like (He imitates her stretching)
(Joey enters)
Joey: Hey you guys.
Joey: I like her so much!
Joey: I don't care, Rach! Look, I am tired of being the guy who knows all the secrets but can't tell anyone!
Joey: But hey, Ross, this place is available now!
[Joey and Ross go back out into the main area.]
Joey: Okay. (to Phoebe and Chandler) Did ah, you guys mean you plus one?
Joey: Totally! I would love to spend New Years with you.
Joey: Listen, while you're on a roll, if you feel like you gotta make like a Western omelet or something... (Joey and Chandler taste the coffee, grimace, and pour it into a plant pot.) Although actually I'm really not that hungry...
[Scene: The Set, Joey, Janine, Ross and Monica are walking in.]
PHOEBE: Ooh, this is it, 74. [screeches to a halt, Joey and Chandler are thrown into the plexiglass wall in the cab]
Ross: (trying to act manly in front of Janine) No I dont want to play video games, Joey!
Joey: Really?
Joey: Well, you lied again! (Rachel comes out of her room and is observing the conversation)
Phoebe: (To Joey) What?!
Joey: Uh-huh.
Joey: What do you mean?
Director: (To Joey) Okay, youre dancing with that girl over there.
Joey: C'mon, you guys. This is a real movie, and Al Pacino's in it, and that's big!
Joey: No-no-no! No-no wait Rach, you know what would even be more fun? Telling them.
Joey: No-no-no-no-no we came together!
Joey: Is this because I come over here without knocking and eat your food? (Walks towards the fridge) Because I can stop doing that, (looks at the fridge) I really, really think I can!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Monica, and Ross are there.]
[Scene: The Mens Bathroom, the tall guy is there as Joey enters.]
Joey: Hey! Tall guy! Hey, listen, I wanted to talk to you about that girl that youre dancing with.
[Scene Joey and Janines new apartment, Janine is there. Joey walks in to see Janine bent over, stretching.]
Joey: But it is our apartment!
Joey: Oh yeah? Well, you don't know about Hugsy, my bedtime penguin pal. (Joey shies away.)
Joey: I'm saying maybe you and I crank it up a notch.
[Cut to Joey and Janine]
Chandler: Oh nope, I-I have plans with Joey.
[Cut to the roof, where Joey and Mr. Treeger are dancing happily to ^Night and Day^.]
Chandler: Look I never should have kissed your girlfriend, but Im (Joey hangs up the phone again.)
Joey: No! Year! Happy No Year!
Joey: Yeah. With a bite! (Takes back the sandwich.) Gee-e-e-eez!
[Scene: Joey and Janines apartment, they both enter.]
Joey: Yeah?
Janine: Joey.
Joey: But only in the moment. So do ya wanna kiss again?
Joey: All right! Now you go get that beautiful pig! (Ross hesitates, looks unsure) Oink!
Joey: No.
Joey: 3, 2,
Joey: Really? In the moment, I really wanted to kiss you too. In the moment.
Joey: Whats not to like? Custard? Good. Jam? Good. Meat? Gooooood.
Joey: Hey!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, everyone is there as Joey enters happily.]
Joey: Oh we kissed it up real nice.
Joey: Yeah baby! (Chandler glares at him.) No baby!
Joey: Okay. (They kiss.)
Joey: Okay. (They kiss.)
Joey: Mornin Pheebs. (Sits down.) Well, my movie has officially been canceled.
[Joey gives her an understanding look.]
Joey: Okay, Im all right, okay, but hey, could you just leave your lips? (She kisses him on the cheek and starts to leave.)
Joey: Hey! I made that for her!
Joey: Look, I'm sorry I didn't tell ya. (To Chandler) I'm sorry man.
Joey: (indignant) I was tired!
Monica: Joey, you dont have too!
Joey: See ya tomorrow!
Joey: What?
Joey: I don't know, but I don't like what I'm hearing!
Joey: What-whats wrong with Monica and Chandler?
Joey: Blah?!
[Cut to Joey and Janines.]
Joey: I guess.
Bonnie: Yeah, Joey and Chandler sure are funny.
Joey: What? No, no, no! No, no... no... no, no... No, too much is changing, okay? First, Phoebe getting married (to Phoebe) Congratulations! (pointing to Monica and Chandler)... and then these two move into a stupid house in the stupid suburbs...
JOEY: Oh, yeah. He's got that great baby smell. Get a whiff of his head.
[Cut back inside to Joey giving a beautiful woman a tennis lesson by standing behind her.]
Joey: (Voice cracking) Well thats like summer in a bowl.
Joey: Uh, theyre like my best friends. Are you saying we cant hang out with them? Cause that would kinda be a problem.
Joey: Yeah that really calms me down. And! We have so much in common! She loves sandwiches, sports, although she is a Met fan, not much of an issue now but if were ever to have kids, well thats a
Joey: And a 50. (The salesman stops suddenly) Huh, these must be Chandlers pants.
Monica: Joey, this is for you. (gives him a jar of jam) It's blackberry curin.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Rosss bachelor party. Ross is thanking Joey for the party.]
Joey: Hi!
Joey: (scolding) Dude, theyre not objects.
Joey: Oh, shes uh-uh really sick.
Joey: No-no, she really is sick!
Joey: Kay!
(Rachel turns and gives him a look, and Joey quickly apologises.)
Joey: I know, but dont you think the sick thing is way better than the play thing?
Joey: Uh, yknow, starve a fever, go to a play for a cold.
Joey: (shouting) I can hear you!
[cut back to Joey on the beach towel]
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Joey: Home sweet home, huh? Nice to, uh, get back to reality. Plus we know how the New Years gonna go off. I guess theres no reason for all that Y2K panic, yknow? Anyway, gnight!
Joey: So uh, what are you guys doing?
Joey: Ross, don't let her drink anymore! (Exits)
Joey: U-N-I-sexy? (Smiles provocatively.)
Joey: You dont think I know that!
[Scene: The street, Chandler and Joey are walking past a jewelery store.]
(Joey pats him on the stomach and heads to bed.)
Joey: Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot you had that whole Rachel thing.