words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the whole gang is there including Janice, theyre watching Happy Days.]
(A commercial for the Mattress King, Janices ex-husband, comes on TV.)
Chandler: (to Janice) Dont look honey. Change the channel! Change the channel!
Janice: Wait! Wait! I wanna see this. After I divorce him, half of that kingdom is gonna be mine.
Janice: Oh, I cannot believe hes using our divorce to sell mattresses.
Phoebe: Ugh! I dont know Monica. It feels funny just being here. I mean if you buy a bed from Janices ex-husband, thats like betraying Chandler.
(Joey goes to the door, but stops and looks through the window at Janice and the Mattress King, her ex-husband, kissing.)
Janice: Oh my God.
Janice: Barley? What kind of party serves barley?
(He gives the agent his ticket and walks onto the jetway. Janice walks over and looks out the window. Chandler walks back into the terminal and tries to walk right past Janice, but she sees him.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, Janice are sitting on the couch, and Phoebe is sitting next to them in the chair.]
ROSS: We'll give you Janice.
JANICE: Oh, my, god.
JANICE: Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry.
ROSS: You remember Janice, right?
PHOEBE: Janice? You called Janice?
JANICE: Hey, it's everybody.
JANICE: Yes, I am.
Janice: Oh! Someone's a little cranky today cuz they have to do it in a cup! (laughs) Oh! They gave you the kiddy size (looking at the cup in his hand).
(Joey leaves with Lorraine. Chandler sits back down with Janice.)
JANICE: Helloo!!
Janice: (laughs) I-I-I gotta go, I gotta go. Okay, not without a kiss.
Janice: Well then ask yourself this. Why do you think we keep ending up together? New Year's? Who invited who? Valentine's? Who asked who into whose bed?
Chandler: (in a British accent) Hello, Janice.
Janice: (holding the full cup) No, no, I'm still working on mine.
CHANDLER: Janice was my safety net, ok? And now I have to get a snake.
Ross: Let-let me make sure I'm hearing this right, you're ending this with me because I'm too whiney? (Janice makes an agreeing sound.) So you're saying, I've become so whiney that I annoy you, Janice.
(Chandler walks back to couch, where Janice is.)
Chandler: (angrily) Hey, it's Janice.
Chandler: No! That was a test! In a couple of hours Im gonna get really drunk and wanna call Kathy and you guys are gonna have to stop me! And then after that, Im gonna get so drunk, Im gonna wanna call Janice
Janice: I will go for that drink.
Chandler: Just do it! Okay, it's Janice and if I get it I'm going to have to see her tonight. (phone stops ringing) Oh, that's great I'm gonna have to see her tonight.
Janice: Say hello to Aaron, your future son-in-law.
PHOEBE: I miss Janice though. "Hello, Chandler Bing."
JANICE: And what? Missed the expression on your face? Janice likes to have her fun.
CHANDLER: Ok, Janice. Janice. You gotta give me Janice. That wasn't about being picky.
Woman: OH MY GAWD!! (Yep, you guessed it. Its Janice.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is waiting for Janice to arrive, and is angrily fllipping through a magazine.]
Chandler: No, Janice.
Joey: This is Janice.
Janice: I'll see you later, sweetie. Bye Joey.
Janice: Well, I gotta buy a vowel. Because, oh my Gawd! Who, would've thought that someday, Chandler Bing would buy me a drawer.
JANICE: OH.....MY.....GAWD!! (Chandler rushes over and kisses her)
Janice: So, I hear, you hate me!
Janice: For Chandler!
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
Janice: What, you can do it in the parking lot of a Taco Bell, but you can't do it at a doctor's office?
Joey: Look, I don't hate Janice, she's-she's just a lot to take, you know.
Janice: We should?
Janice: Oh, (laughs) I wish. No, you know he was just trying Ross's Hug and Roll thing.
Janice: Well, Sid and I are trying again and we had trouble last time because apparently we...
Rachel: What's the big deal? Why don't you wanna see Janice?
Chandler: Janice I didnt even know you were pregnant! Whos the unwitting human whos essence youve stolen?
Janice: You probably want us to move in together?
Janice: What are you doing here?
Janice: Oh, you didn't have to do this.
Janice: Are you being British?!
Janice: What woman?!
Janice: Where is this party?
Janice: Who's party is it?
Janice: Oh, sure. Now. But what happens when he meets somebody else and gets married?
Janice: Janice has a question. Who of the six of you has sleep with the six of you?
Janice: I dont know.
Janice: Oh my Gawd, I-I understand. I-I am so sorry, Ill go. (Starts for the door.) Good-bye Monica (hugs her), I wish you a lifetime of happiness with him. Chandler, (hugs him) you call me when this goes in the pooper. (Hurries out.)
Janice: I just came up to say, "Hi!" Hi! (to Chandler) And you, sweetie, Ill see you tonight.
Janice: Why are your eyes so white?
Janice: In the park?
Janice: The receipt.
Janice: Night-night Bing-a-ling.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Janice are there.]
Janice: Wow!
Janice: You know what, where he hugs you and kinda rolls you away and... Oh... my....God.
Janice: (entering) Hows my Bing-a-ling?
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
Joey: Cute! This is Janice! You remember Janice?
Janice: Just those two!
Janice: Oh my God!!
Janice: How did you know?
Janice: Okay.
Janice: What?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are there. Chandler is preparing to dump Janice again.]
Janice: Good-bye Chandler Bing. (walks out with one shoe)
Janice: (standing up) Im sorry. (hugs him)
Chandler: I just saw Janice.
Joey: B-bye Janice. So when ya' dumpin' her.
Janice: Ow. Um, it's just my lens. It's just my lens. I'll be right back.
Joey: Come on man! You never want to do anything since you and Janice broke up.
Janice: Honey, honey, people are looking.
Chandler: Whoa-ho, whoa! No, I was thinking about y'know for me, as a part of that whole getting over Janice thing you were talking about.
[Scene: Chandler's bedroom, Janice and him are cuddling]
[Scene: Central Perk, the whole gang is there including Janice.]
Janice: Hey you guys, umm do either one of you want to get in there before I take my bath.
Janice: Yes, because that's how long it takes to love me.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Chandler are on their date with Janice and Clark, however Clark is a no show and Janice is crying the Mississippi River about it.]
CHANDLER: Oh my God! (it's Janice)
Janice: Although, I have enjoyed the fact that, uh your shirt's been stickin' outta your zipper ever since you came back from the bathroom.
Janice: Oh, I wish. Look, honey, you have that report to finish, and I gotta go see my lawyer.
Monica: You guys, Joey just saw Janice kissing her ex-husband.
[Scene: The Restaurant, Joey, Lorraine, Chandler, and Janice are at the table. Joey and Lorraine are seated very close, Chandler and Janice have backed their chairs away from one another.]
CHANDLER: Yes. She was smart, she was pretty, and she honestly cared about me. Janice is my last chance to have somebody.
PHOEBE: Chandler, you called Janice! That's how much you wanted to be with someone!
[Suddenly the door opens and Ross's mystery girl enters. I'll give you a hint to who it is: OH .MY .GAWD!! Uh-huh, it's Janice.]
Janice: So, how come you wanted to eat in tonight?
Janice: Come on over the years none of you ever y'know, got drunk and stupid.
Phoebe: No, I mean you break up with Janice and I'll break up with Tony.
Chandler: Janice! There you are! There you are! I had to have one last kiss, and also-also you said that you were going to leave right after I got on the plane!
Janice: I love this artichoke thing! Oh, don't tell me what's in it, the diet starts tomorrow! (Laughs her Janice laugh)
Monica: (to the lobster) Lucky bastard! (Throws the lobster in and turns around to face the planets most annoying woman, next to Dr. Laura and Kathy Lee Gifford of course. Shes the most annoying female TV character however.) Janice.