words in movies
Phoebe: Hey, its your Thanksgiving too, y'know, instead of watching football, you could help.
(Rachel sticks a marshmellow into Monicas nose. Monica takes it out of her nose by closing one nostril, and blowing.)
Joey: Chandler, you have to start getting over her. All right, if you play, you get some fresh air, maybe itll take your mind off Janice, and if you dont play, everyone will be mad at you cause the teams wont be even. Come on.
Rachel: Lets do it! Ross?
Monica: Anyway, Ross and I were always captains, and um, it got kindve competitive and one year, Geller Bowl VI, I accidentally broke Rosss nose.
Ross: It was soo not an accident. She saw I was about to tag her, so she threw her big fat grandma arm elbow right into my face. And just keep running.
Ross: Yes, it was the trophy you got if you won the game. But our Dad said, nobody won that game, and he was sick of our fighting, so he took the trophy and.... (pauses to collect himself, as he is on the verge of tears saying this) threw it in the lake.
Monica: Y'know what, I think we should play a game. I mean come on, its been twelve years.
(they walk over to the sink and discuss it for a moment)
Monica: Okay. Lets bring it in.
Rachel: Wait no, honey, honey throw it to me, throw it to me.
Rachel: (knocking it down instead of catching it) That almost hit me in the face.
Monica: Okay, Joeys gonna catch it, and you and I are gonna block.
Chandler: Sorry. Im sorry. Y'know what, were just gonna throw it.
Joey: I got it. (catches the ball)
(Monica throws the ball over Joeys head, its stopped from rolling away by a very beautiful woman.)
Monica: Come on guys! Lets go! Come on, its second down.
Ross: Uh, hello, its third down.
Monica: No its not, its second.
Ross: It just amazes me that your still pulling stuff like this.
Monica: Pulling what? Its second down.
Ross: Okay, its second down. (turns away) Take all the second downs you need.
Ross: Well, I said it loud.
Margha: It is okay, if I stay and watch?
Joey: Thanks man, but I think it makes a stronger statement if I ask for it myself, y'know.
Joey: Well I dont like to say it out loud, but, yeah! Dont feel bad man, we all have our strengths. Youre better with numbers and stuff.
Chandler: Math!! Youre giving me math! All right, look y'know what, forget about it, you go for the girl, well see who gets her.
Rachel: Yeah, I know, go long. Y'know, its like all Im doing is running back and forth from the huddle.
(Rachel takes the ball from his hands and bounces it off of Rosss forehead and Chandler catches the rebound.)
(Joey starts to return the fumble and Chandler grabs Joeys shirt and rips it off of his back.)
Joey: All right, thats it. Y'know I was still gonna let you have her. But now, forget about it. Prepare to feel very bad about yourself.
Phoebe: Oh I got it!! (catches the ball) Oh! Ew! Broken boob! Ow!
Ross: Uh, hello, the buzzer buzzed. It doesnt count.
Rachel: Now, does it really matter?
Phoebe: Well, okay, I made a touchdown. It was my first touchdown. So?
Ross: Oh Pheebs, thats great. It doesnt count.
Monica: No! Listen, Im not gonna go through this with you again, okay. Just once I wanna beat when you cant blame it on the broken nose, the buzzer, or the fact that you thought you were getting mono. Lets just call this, tie score and its halftime.
Monica: When Mom and Dad drove you to the hospital to get your nose fixed, I swam into the lake and fished it out.
Monica: No its not! You want it, youre gonna have to win it!
Monica: Come on Phoebe, lets go! Come on, its time to get serious, huddle up. Joey, keep your head in the game.
Joey: Its hard, y'know, his huddle is closer to Dutch girl.
[Sequence 1: Monica throws the ball over Chandlers head to Joey who catches it for a touchdown, and starts to dance in celebration. Chandler then tackles him, and he starts to dance in celebration.]
[Sequence 3: Chandler throws a pass to Ross, who catches it. Phoebe starts screaming and runs up to him and tries to tackle him. But all she ends up doing is running around his waist and screaming.]
[Sequence 4: Ross hikes the ball to Chandler, and the camera pans down to show Rachel standing deep in the end zone, playing with her gum. Something hits her on the head and she looks up to see where it came from.]
Ross: Its no surprise that your winning, cause you got to pick first, so you got the better team.
Monica: Youre so pathetic! Why cant you just accept it, were winning because Im better than you.
Monica: Oh, what a great argument, exhaling! All right, y'know what, Ill prove it to you, okay. Ill trade you Joey for Rachel, and Ill still win the game.
Monica: Oh, then bring it on! Oh, unless of course your afraid you might lose to a bunch of girls.
Monica: Come on Rach, come on. Lets see whats it like to be on a winning team for a change.
Joey: Yeah, Chandler finds me so intimdating that its better if were on the same team.
Chandler: Well, you dont you have Captain Hook explain it to her.
Chandler: Y'know what, it doesnt matter, cause she picked me. Me! From now on I get the dates and you have to stay home on Saturday nights watching Ready, Set, Cook!
Ross: Hey! Its 42-21!
[Sequence 2: Phoebe throws the ball, and its intercepted by Joey, who starts to run up field. Rachel jumps on his back in order to try and tackle him, but she doesnt slow him down. Monica and Phoebe then both grab her legs in order to stop Joey, who still manages to fight through the tackle and score the touchdown.]
Monica: All right Rachel, you sweep behind, Ill pitch it to you, you throw it down field to Phoebe. All right. Break.
(They all rush toward Rachel, who panics and runs away. She runs out of the park and up along the fence, she then comes back into the park and runs past Monica, as she gets to Monica, she throws the ball at Monica, and it hits her in the eye.)
(In slow motion, Phoebe snaps the ball, Rachel goes long. Joey and Chandler and all over Phoebe, leaving Rachel wide open. Ross starts to rush Monica, who sees Phoebe is double covered, in desperation she throws to Rachel. We see flying through the air, and then Rachel running underneath it, then the ball, then Rachel again, then the ball, then Phoebe, Chandler, and Joey staring at it in shock. Then with the grace of Jerry Rice (no offense to Jerry Rice), Rachel catches the ball, and she stops and spikes the ball. Both Phoebe and Monica erupt in celebration.)
Rachel: (in triumph) I got a touchdown! We did it!!
(they all start to dive for the ball and Monica and Ross grab it at the same time.)
Chandler: Guys! Guys! Come on! Its Thanksgiving, its not important who wins or loses. The important thing is, (to Joey) the Dutch girl picked me! Me! Not you! Holland loves Chandler! Thank you, Amsterdam! Good night!!
[Scene: The park, its dark outside and Monica and Ross are still fighting over the ball.]
Ross: How come its always us left in the field holding the ball?
(It starts snowing.)
Ross: Hey! Its starting to snow.
(They both look up, and watch it start to snow. Then they both start fighting for the ball again.)
Ross: Rach, come on, I’m not gonna wear any of this! (he picks up a shirt) Nothing silver. (Rachel sighs). Ok? Nothing with hair! (Rachel sighs again) And nothing with padlocks on it! (Rachel heaves a long disappointing sigh).
ROSS: Would it matter?
Joey: But no, it's not close. You said it was in escrow? I couldn't even find it on the map.
ROSS: That is so good! Do it again!
Monica: Okay. (Opens the fridge.) All right, turkey. Eh, that wont work. Cheese? (Picks it up) That wont work. Olive loaf? (Picks it up) I hope that wont work.
Chandler: Course there, they just call it food.
PHOEBE: I think it went into me.
MRS GREEN: Sweetie! So this is where you work? Oh, it's wonderful! Is it a living room? Is it a restaurant? Who can tell? But I guess that's the fun.
Barry: ....Mindy. Mindy, of course Mindy, it was always Mindy.
MNCA: [disgusted, trying not to show it] I love how it crumbles. Now see, your chocolate doesn't do that.
Monica: Is it me? Is it like I have some sort of beacon that only dogs and men with severe emotional problems can hear?
Chandler: (entering from bathroom, with an issue of Cosmo) All right, I took the quiz, and it turns out, I do put career before men. (to Joey) Get up.
Joey: No, thats VH-1. I gotta tell you, the music these kids listen to today . . . Its like a lotta noise to me. I dont know
Ross: (not turning around) Chandler. I sensed it was you.
MONICA: Really? Weird. Anyway, see, I planned everything really well. I planned and I planned and I planned. It just turns out, I don't think I planned enough time to actually do it.
MONICA: Joey, speed it up!
RACHEL: Ok, while you "mmm" on it for awhile, I'm gonna go find a place for my new lamp.
RACHEL: You want me to talk you out of it?
CAROL: How's it going?
Rachel: Oh, y'know, its just like hats, and a shirt, and CDs, just sort of stuff that youve left here.
Chandler: Excuse me, look, we've been here for over an hour, and a lot of people less sick than my friend have gone in. I mean, that guy with the toe thing? Who's he sleeping with? (She slides the gladd panel over and Chandler talks through it in a loud voice.) Oh, c'mon Dora, don't be mad... I know we both said some things we didn't mean, but that doesn't mean we still don't love each other. (To the waiting room.) Y'know, I feel like I've lost her.. (She slides the panel back, he turns, and it takes him by surprise.) Ba-!
Barry: We can, we can go to Aruba! When I went there on what would have been our honeymoon, it was, uh... it was really nice. You would've liked it.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Ross, Monica, and now Chandler are still playing catch. The guys are exhausted and sitting around the room. Monica is still standing all pumped up and being hyper-competitive yet again. {Okay! We get it! She's competitive!! Must we see all the time?!}]
Joey: Uh Look Rach (Ross enters.) Hey Ross is here! Hey look! Its my good friend Ross. Hey Ross.
Rachel: No, no-no, its okay, calm down. Mark and I talked, and I realised how much I love your stupid brother, and, yeah, we got our problems, but I really want to make it work.
Rachel: Oh yknow what? Yknow what? Now that you know what you want you should go to Kleinmans and get it half off. This place is so overpriced.
Phoebe: And! And, theyre gonna have a baby! (The gang is shocked.) And! And, they want me to grow it for them in my uterus. (The gang is stunned into silence.)
Ross: I guess it all started when Rachel got this new job. (he sits down at the table.)
(Rachel picks up a newspaper and starts beating him with it.)
Joey: No room? Its a baby. Its like this big. (Holds his hands about a foot apart.) Yknow, I mean you-you could you could put it over here. (A desk.) Or-or-or we could put it right here. (The chair.) Aw, its cute, right? Or-or we could put it over here. (By the bathroom door.) You wouldnt even notice it. Wheres the baby? (Mumbles that its over in the corner.)
JOEY: Yeah it is. . . what?
Phoebe: We found your test in the trash, if youre not pregnant(She sees Rachel shaking her head)Its because I am.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is sitting on the couch, eating candy. It is raining out. Ross climbs up the fire escape and is knocking on the window.]
PHOEBE: I sense these things. It was either but or butter.
Chandler: (tastes it) Well.... it is amouz-ing...
Joey: Anyway, it uh look itll just take me a while to get over her, thats all. Im not even sure how to do that, I mean Ive never been in love before so
RACHEL: Oh, I know, I know. [Turns on the TV. Joey in on it.]
Phoebe: Okay. Good, all right, lets get back in the car, cause its freezing, and my chest is unsupported.
(Rachel spins the bottle and it lands on .wait for it .Joshua. (You thought I was going to say Ross, didnt you?) Rachel squeals in delight and starts a slow sexy crawl over to Joshua, making sure he and everyone else watching gets a good look at her cleavage.)
Rachel: Okay, but if it only happened that one time, how come we found your underwear in our apartment the other day?
CHANDLER: Uh, yes, yes it is.
Joey: Okay, and ah, this one here is a Douglas Fir, now its a little more money, but you get a nicer smell.
Chandler: Well, sure, but can you play it on a plane? (pats his Travel Scrabble game)
MONICA: I'm at work, ordinary day, you know, chop chop chop, sauti, sauti, sauti. All of a sudden, Leon, the manager, calls me into his office. It turns out they fired the head lunch chef, and guess who got the job.
PHOEBE: Thinkin' about it.
Rachel: (opening it) A scooter! (Shes not happy.)
RACHEL: OK, I'm doin' it for ya.
Chandler: Um, is it sugarless?
Phoebe: Is that a new Swede jacket? It looks really expensive.
Monica: "Hi Im Rachel, is my sweater too tight? No? Oh, Id better wash it and shrink it!"
SUSIE: Well I was thinking it would be um, kind of sexy if you wore mine tonight, at dinner.
(Chandler sulkilty picks up a garbage can lid and uses it as an umbrella.)
Monica: (on machine) "Hi, it's Monica. I'm just checking in 'cause I got this message from you and I didn't know if it was old or new or what. So, I'm just checkin'. So let me know, or don't, whatever. I'm breezy."
Ross: I don't know. I could talk to her boss. Yeah! I met him at that Christmas party. We really hit it off.
JOEY: Forget about it.
Monica: Oh God Phoebe!! (Phoebe covers one ear.) Oh thats it! Thats it! Right there! Oh! (Tries to cover the other ear.) Ooooh-oooh-ooooh (Covers both ears and continues the massage with her elbows.)
MONICA: Say it.
[Monica grabs Rachel by the sweater. Rachel squirms out of it]
Ross: Check it out! Almost 3 hours without droppin' it!
Joey: (wipes a little jam from the corner of his mouth) Did I get it?
PHOEBE: Ok, I didn't see it, because I was putting on my jacket, but I uh want to believe you.
Mike: Okay, when I got divorced, I didn't think I'd feel this way about someone for a really long time... Then again, I didn't think I'd meet someone like you... and... this may be crazy soon, but... I want you to have this... (He tries to get something from his pocket, but it's not that easy... Phoebe looks in a "what's happening" face to him. He finally has found something) No, not... that's gum. (He digs in a little more.) Ooh, five bucks... I love it when that happens, you know... Think no note's there...
MONICA: Rachel, you say you're sorry or your sweater gets it.
Rachel: (to a pregnant Leslie) Look at you, you are so big I can't believe it!
Monica: Rachel, what are you doing? Its freezing out here. Would you come back inside?
Chandler: Umm, hows it going with you guys?
JOEY: Put it on.
[Scene: Chandler and Eddie's apartment. Chandler is there. There's a knock at the door. He answers it to see a young woman holding a fishtank.]
MONICA: You got it.
MONICA: Oh-oh, no no don't worry, I'm gonna wash it.
Phoebe: (Smiling blankly) Right, and its me.
Ross: Hey, when-when was it kicking? What happened?
Joey: Just watch it, and if you don't like it, you don't pass it on to your bosses!
Rachel: (grabs Chandler by the shirt) All right, listen, smirky. If it wasn't for you and your stupid balloon, I would be on a plane watching a woman do this (makes a gesture like a stewardess pointing out exits) right now. But I'm not.
Monica: Thats a good question. Look umm, last night we let the dice decide. Maybe we should leave it up to fate again. I love you!
Ross: Ugh, between the traffic that time of day and all the one-way streets itll take me twice as long. Besides, I teach the class three times a week, who am I? Rockefeller?
Chandler: (standing in the door of the fridge) Well, I dont have to break up with her this time. Were not involved! Im going to do a pre-emptive strike! Im going to end it with her before it starts. My ass is like frozen! (Closes the fridge.)
Charlie: I guess. There was hum... (she breathes deeply) there was another reason that I thought it was time to end it with Joey. I started to realize that I was having feelings for someone (pause) else.
RICHARD: Uh, they're not in it.
Chandler: How can I not be upset? Okay? I finally fall in love with this fantastic woman and it turns out that she wanted you first!
CHANDLER: I can't believe it.
ROSS: I don't get it, he seemed so happy to see me yesterday.
JOEY: It's gonna be worth it. It's a known fact that women love babies, all righ? Women love guys who love babies. It's that whole sensitive thing. Quick, aim him at that pack o' babes over there. Maybe one of them will break away. No, no wait, for get them, we got one, hard left. All right, gimme the baby.
MONICA: Hey, you got me, put it in.
Chandler: Ill take it! All right look, I gotta know. Are you finished with me? (Janice shakes her head no) Are you finished with him? (Janice shakes her head no) Do you still love him? (Janice shakes her head yes) Do you still love me? (Janice shakes her head yes) All right look, (grabs the bag) Im gonna need an actual answer here okay, so which is it, him or me? (his phone starts to ring)
MONICA: Well, CHP because I used to have a crush on Eric Estrada. And ZXY becuase I think it sounds zexy.
MR. HECKLES: You're doing it again.
MONICA: Oh, dad, turn it off.
MR. GELLER: It is off.
Monica: Its a dead dog. Thats Chi-Chi; she died when I was in high school.
Monica: Ok, for my next song I think I�ll sing something a little more upbeat. All right? Oh, how about the PointerSisters �I am so excited�. And make it bouncy!
Chandler: Okay, look, Joey! Come on, think about it, first of all, hell never be President. Theres never gonna be a President Joey.
Conan: (to Courtney) You-youve worn a fat suit on the show. And, a lot of people love you in the fat suit. Do you like wearing the fat suit? Is it fun?
The Fan: No-no, it was! She was in Sex Toy Story 2, Lawrence of Alabia, and I got her autograph! The guys at the comic book store arent gonna believe this! (Exits.)
CHANDLER: I didn't know it was a big secret.
Phoebe: Yeah, and theyve been coming by all day. They love it!
(He gets up to make the copies leaving Rachel alone with his stuff. She notices his sweater in his backpack and holds it up to her nose as Melissa, a coworker, walks up.)
MONICA: Dr. Burke, it, it's me.
Rachel: Oh, its a Macys bag!
Chandler: So you understand, Id feel a lot more comfortable if you didnt tell people what happened. Yknow, Im a little Im a little embarrassed about it.