words in movies
Ross: What did you want to show us? Because all I can see is this bitchin' van!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is all there.]
Ross: Nooo!! Gandolf?! Gandolf is coming to town?
Phoebe: Wow! Okay, dude alert! And who is this guy?
Chandler: This is gonna be soo cool, dude, we never party anymore!
Ross: Joey, you are gonna love this guy. Gandolf is like the party wizard!
Ross: Gandolf the wizard. (Joey is still confused) Hello! Didnt you read Lord of the Rings in high school?
Rachel: Well, actually, I meant for me. The hiring committee is meeting people all day and
Joanna: You know, Junior Miss is where I started. Oh, I had to sleep with the ugliest guy to get that job.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is getting ready to party.]
Chandler: Look you dont understand, Gandolf is amazing. Yknow youre never know whats gonna end up happening, you go out for a couple of beers and end up on a fishing boat to Nova Scotia!
Ross: Ohh, man! Chicago, is sooo lucky!
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachel is meeting with Mr. Posner, Mrs. Lynch, and Joanna the hiring committee.]
Mr. Posner: Yes, thats very good. Now a uh, big part of this job is cultivating personal relationships, especially with designers.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is there as Monica enters carrying a huge stack of newspapers.]
Monica: Hey! My first review is out!
Monica: (answering it) Who is it?
Allesandro: (entering) I want a retraction! Our food is not inedible swill!
Allesandro: Well our service is not grossly incompetent.
Allesandro: How long is this gonna take? Cause I got another critic to go yell at.
[Scene: Rachels office, Rachel is confronting Joanna about her interview.]
Rachel: Oh my God!! Ohh, that is it! Im leaving! You are just a horrible person!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is entering, excited.]
Phoebe: Okay, is this the day of good news or what? I got us a job! The wedding reception.
[Scene: Central Perk, the next day, Phoebe is there.]
[Scene: Rachels office, she is coming in for the day carrying a picture for her new office. Mrs. Lynch is coming out of Joannas office, carrying a box.]
Rachel: Oh, hi Mrs. Lynch! Is Joanna in already?
Rachel: Yes, so close. Mrs. Lynch, I know that this is an emotional and difficult time, for all of us. But by any chance did Joanna send any paperwork your way before it happened.
[Scene: Monicas new kitchen, Allesandro is introducing her to her new employees.]
Allesandro: Im so excited about having Monica come on board with us. Although I do feel bad about having fired chef Emillio, its like losing a member of the family. Of course, that literally is the case for several of you. Tony, Carlos, Marie, please, tell your father how much were gonna miss him. Now, I know that Monica has a lot of great ideas for this place, well, you all read the review. So without much further ado, I present to you our new head chef.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are returning. Phoebe is still on hold.]
Monica: Noo!! The point is that is was you that was there that night! It is you that I am marrying! It is you that I feel in love with!
Joey: No-no, she really is sick!
RACHEL: Terry is a jerk, ok? That's why we're always saying "Terry's a jerk!" That's where that came from.
Chandler: Then why-why is she going to a play?!
Chandler: Y'know that whole swimming thing is a myth.
Rachel: When a guy breaks up with his girlfriend, what is an appropriate amount of time to wait before you make a move?
Ross: Rain? Hi. Hi, my name is Rain. I have my own kiln, and my dress is made out of wheat.
Rachel: Whatyeahwhat, yknow what? I hope Emily is a lesbian.
Monica: I mean theyre trying to do everything they can to make me quit, and if there were any other job, I would. But this is something Ive been waiting for my whole life.
Joey: I know, but dont you think the sick thing is way better than the play thing?
Phoebe: Oh, this is like the best day ever. Ever! You guys might get back together, Monica and Chandler are getting their baby, there are chicks and ducks in the world again! Oh, I feel like I'm in a musical! (Singing) "Daa - raa... When the sun comes up, bright and beaming! And the moon comes..."
Monica: Well, this is the last box of your clothes. Im just gonna label it, "What were you thinking?"
[Scene: The Rehearsal dinner hall. Ross is at the Walthams table discussing the bill.]
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's weekend, a hotel clerk is showing them their new room.]
Chandler: What the hell is going on?!
Monica: No, my eye doctor is Richard! I cant go to him when I dont have a boyfriend!
Ross: (pause) No. But... it only has to happen once. Look, you and I both know we are perfect for each other, right? I mean... so, the only question is... are you attracted to me?
Chandler: (To Joey) Look there is no way youre doing this wedding now. Okay?
Monica: You don't know everything. Did you know that I'm going out with Rachel tonight instead of you? Hmm? And did you know that the only baby around here is you?! And did you know that I can't even look at you right now?! (She storms out.)
(Rachel is looking at the magazine and laughing.)
Chandler: Joey, why is your cable out?
Ross: No-no-no. I don't have a son named Jordie. We all agreed, my son's name is Jamie.
Phoebe: Well, how-how-how is that possible? You barely know her!
Monica: What?! Ross y'know this isnt even about you! I mean this is about Rachel and something wonderful happening for her. I mean you know even if youre right, what if he wants to sleep with her, does it mean he gets too?
Ross: What, you didnt get it? The doctor is a monkey.
Chandler: Well, she is going to know that you stole the joke.
Monica: Its wrong. You know what else is wrong? Phoebe picking Rachel.
Phoebe: (singing) "Went to the store, sat on Santa's lap. Asked him to bring my friends all kind of crap. Said all you need is to write them a song. They haven't heard it, so don't try and sing along. No, don't sing along.
Joey: Oh really! Where? Somewhere funny I'd bet! (Chandler is straining to keep quiet as Phoebe enters.)
Rachel: All right, wherever you wanna go is cool.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is returning and finds Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
(There is a knock on the door, Phoebe answers it, its Mr. Heckles)
Dr. Green: (gets his receipt and notices the twenty) What is this? Who put a twenty down here? Huh?
(Joey is looking at his check.)
Ross: Look, this is a disaster! Can't I please just go?
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachels, Phoebe is sitting on the couch as Rachel and Monica enter.]
[Scene, The Park, Rachel is running and Phoebe is hiding behind a tree.]
Joshua: Yeah, that would be fantastic! My-my nephew is crazy about the Knicks! This is fantastic, thank you so much Rachel. (He takes the tickets and leaves as Mr. Waltham returns.)
Joey: I dont know, Chandler is supposed to be passin em around...
Phoebe: No, I don't think this was your shot. I mean, I don't even think you just get one shot. I really believe big things are gonna happen for you, I do! You've gotta just keep thinking about the day that some kid is gonna run up to his friends and go 'I got the part! I got the part! I'm gonna be Joey Tribbiani's ass!'.
[Scene: Elevator at the Ralph Lauren Offices, Rachel gets in . Kim is there.]
Chandler: Okay, okay. You have to help us decide whose joke this is.
Ross: Well each tell you how we came up with the joke and then you decide which one of us is telling the truthme.
Rachel: Wow, you know what? That is the best fake speech I think Ive ever heard.
Chandler: Is not.
Rachel: Yeah! Its an apothecary table. Does anyone even know what an apothecary is?
Phoebe: Wow! That is a bad audition.
Joey: This is crazy.
Rachel: Oh it does, it does! It is a room separating apparatus from Colonial times.
[Scene: Carol and Susans, Rachel is talking with Ben.]
Ross: Emily, there is nothing between Rachel and me. Okay? I love you.
Phoebe: Yeah Joey that is so gross!
Chandler: Quick! What time is it?! (Holds his watch in front of her face.)
Rachel: This is Chandler. (Points at him.)
Joey: Oh, man, I could totally get that part. Im sorry, that seat is taken.
[Scene: Their building's lobby, Danny is checking his mailbox as Rachel enters carrying shopping bags and goes to her mailbox. Danny has shaved his beard and cut his hair, Rachel doesn't recognize him.]
Chandler: (To Monica) If this is the way all the Gellers flirt, we don't have a problem.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is playing his music. Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
[Scene: The hallway, continued from earlier. Monica is still locked out.]
Phoebe: Is it okay if I leave this stuff here 'til Rachel's birthday party?
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel's, Rachel is putting away her new clothes as Phoebe enters.]
[Scene: at Barry and Mindy's reception, Monica and Richard are sitting at a table, and Monica is trying to throw a piece of candy into his mouth.]
Rachel: Oh there is no way.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is giving the bill to the same beautiful woman from before.]
Rachel: That is great. Hey, yknow who doesnt have to job hunt? Ross. He works at the university.
Rachel: Oh not-not so much. Umm, what-what do you, what do you mean is there something wrong with Ross?
Frank: I can't believe there's somebody coming out of you right now. There's somebody coming out of you! Is it? Is it? It's my son.
Monica: I cant believe it! What is it? Is it the rubbing or the smell?
Joey: Oh this is great! I might actually get to play Ben's dad!
Rachel: Oh, this is just terrible.
(We see that Ross is returning to his apartment with Jill.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel enters and walks quickly over to the window to watch Rosss apartment. We see that Rosss apartment is empty.]
(We see that Ross is taking off Jills coat.)
Monica: (entering with Chandler) Who? (She looks out the window at Rosss apartment) Is that your sister?
Monica: Oh no its not, no its not. Its a first date. Im sure that nothing is gonna (as she is talking we see Ross close his drapes.)
[Scene: Joeys apartment, Joey is sitting at the counter as Chandler enters.]
[Scene: Joey and Janines, Joey is pacing around as Chandler and Monica enter.]
Monica: Are you kidding me?! Is this; is this turning you on?
Chandler: (looking) Is that a swing?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, The Halloween party has started. Monica is setting out some food as Rachel enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is poking his head in.]
Chandler: Well, I umm, I mean this is just off the top of my head now, umm but I have this friend. This actor friend and he would kill me if he thought I was doing this umm, but umm would it be possible for him to get an audition for your movie say on Thursday?
(We see the TV and its the last scene where ET is saying goodbye.)
Monica: (crying) This is my favorite part.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica is cooking and Rachel is getting ready for a date with Joshua.]
Phoebe: I know! Robin is so gay!
Phoebe: Maybe your resolution is to not make fun of your friends, especially the ones who may soon be flying you to Europe for free on their own plane.
[Cut to the hallway, Janine is entering as Monica is taking out the garbage.]
Chandler: (totally not crying) Well see now that I can see crying over, but Bambi is a cartoon!
Joey: (holding up the Queen of Clubs) Is that your card? (He winks and smiles.)
Rachel: Ugh, she is a slut!
Joey: And it is a love that is based on having and giving and receiv(Shuts up on Monicas glare.)
Ross: Hey! Uh, Phoebes not here is she?
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is hurrying Chloe out the door.]
Ross: (Stepping in between them.)Okay! Okay! Thats it!! Parents!! Parents!! Back away!! All right, this is our wedding day! From now on everyone gets along, and if I hear one more word. NO GRANDCHILDREN! (Pointing at his mother.) Thats right!!
{Transcriber's Note: The credits list two characters, Tia and Samantha, who I assume are the sweaty women Joey and Chandler meet. However, I don't know which is which, so I've simply called them Woman #1 and Woman #2.}
Chandler: Her ankle is what youre watching?
Rachel: Oh, its a tattoo! Thats weird, Phoebe doesnt Wait thats Ursula! Thats not Phoebe that is Ursula!
Monica: Ill get everybody else (Does so), finally we can start celebrating my(She gasps and is stopped by the sight of Ross and Rachel making out in the hall.) Im sorry, uh apparently Ive opened the door to the past.