words in movies
Rachel: I know... Honey, seriously, I did it all. The luggage that I'm taking is in the bedroom, this is Emma's Paris stuff, these are the boxes that I'm having shipped, and that's the sandwich that I made for the plane...
Rachel: Oh, well. Everything that I need (she takes her bag) is in here and my travel documents are on the counter organized in the order that I will be needing them.
Rachel: What? Maybe I put it in here (she opens her bag). Oh, oh, it's not in there! Oh, no! I must have packed it in one of these boxes!
Erica: Hey, well, in a couple of weeks I won't be able to travel.
Monica: Because we're moving in a couple of days and it just didn't make sense.
Ross: Erica, those things aren't free. In fact they have one of the highest mark-ups of any consumer product...
Monica: Oh, I know. I know. Hey, you know, you can take it if you want! The lease is still in Nana's name.
[Scene: Guest room. Joey has his head wrapped in bubbled wrap and Chandler is punching him. Ross enters the room.]
Monica: All right, Rachel's party is in a couple of hours and there's a lot to do. Now, Ross, you got Geller blood, you're in charge of these yahoos!
Joey: Hey! Handcuffs! And fur line, nice! I didn't know you guys had it in ya!
Monica: Well, I thought this would be a great opportunity to use up all the food that I don't want to move to the new house with me! So, enjoy: smoke oyster casserole with a breakfast cereal crust, kidney beans in their own juices, and for dessert, a questionable orange.
Joey: Oh, she's putting Emma down, she'll be over in a second.
Joey: Who loses fifty seven coin tosses in a row? Head she wins, tails I lose. (he stops and starts realizing something) Wait a minute...
Phoebe: Yes! You know, in six months the Statute of Limitations runs out and I can travel internationally again!
Ross: Hey, what do you think they're doing in there?
Rachel: Oh, oh. (she's holding the present, a transparent bag with a white stick in it). What is this?
Monica: Chandler? I was just in our bedroom and I found these (she holds the furry handcuffs) on my pillow.
Chandler: Oh, yes. I decided to leave these out for you in case Richard stops by and you wanna engage on a little light bondage and moustache play!
Chandler: Really? Then what are they doing in our guestroom?
Monica: Rachel used to live in that room.
Rachel: Mon... Okay... I've gotta... just say what it is I'm gonna say... None of the amazing things that have happened to me in the last ten years, would have happened if it wasn't for you. No-one has been more like a sister to me...
Ross: (to Joey) Oh no, she took down Monica... And I'm the crier in the family. Oh God! I could be next. Maybe she won't talk with me if it looks like we're deep in converstation. Oh, so that thing you said about the thing. It really made me think about that other thing.
Chandler: No, no, no... They're really yours. We... found them in your old room.
Chandler: Oh, you're definately not. I haven't cried like that in years.
Ross: Oh no, maybe it's me, I'm just not giving you enough credit. Uh, I mean it is difficult to say goodbye to five people. Uh, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, good... (makes choking noises) IT'S PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE. You know what? After all we've been through, I can't believe this is how you want to leave things between us. Have a, have a good time in Paris. (He leaves the apartment. Rachel looks kind of desperate.)
Monica: We're moving in a couple of days and we've got a lot of packing to do. It would be great if you guys could pitch in.
Chandler: Joey and I can finish up in the guest room.
Monica: Oh no! You and Phoebe are gonna help me in here.
Monica: Okay, we're gonna start in the kitchen. Plates get put into plate protectors and stacked ten to a box. The silverware gets bundled in rubber bands and then bubble wrapped. Got it?
Erica: Oh, it was okay. I went to a movie with my cousin and then out for dinner. We went to this place that had... Ooh... (she looks likes she is in pain, holding her belly) Hoo... ooh... Anyway, they had these really amazing cheeseburgers.
Monica: She doesn't have a stomach ache, she's in labor.
Erica: (in pain) Ooh! Are you sure?
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Rachel bursts in.]
Joey: A little more, a little more. (she stuffs some more down his pants and Joey's assesses the how many there already are in there.) A little more... All right. Okay, all right, let's do this.
(she knees him in the crotch. He jumps up a bit)
Joey: (in pain) Doesn't work... (he falls down on on his knees with his head on the floor)
JOEY: Hey, hey, and I'm in the movie.
Chandler: Nina? Nina. (He goes around his desk to where she is sitting.) Nina. (In pain) Nina.
PHOEBE: Thank you for coming everybody. There're cookies in the back.
Rachel: Op, look! Claire forgot her glasses! And she's gonna be really needing these to keep an eye on that boyfriend, who, I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his desk drawer, if you know what I'm talking about.
Ross: I can't believe we're gonna be the only people that aren't in this wedding.
[Scene: Lydia's Hospital Room, Joey is helping Lydia go through labor, a nurse is now present in her room as well.]
Chandler: No! That was a test! In a couple of hours Im gonna get really drunk and wanna call Kathy and you guys are gonna have to stop me! And then after that, Im gonna get so drunk, Im gonna wanna call Janice
Chandler: I dont know! What could she possibly be hiding in here that I cant see?!
PHOEBE: Look kibbles, bits. Oh God, alright, get the hell off my leg you yippity piece of crap. [Flings the dog off and jumps in the cab. The dog keeps jumping up to the window.] Ok, alright, we have a problem.
ROSS: Well, I tracked down Marcel and get this, he's healthy, he's happy, and he's right here in New York filming Outbreak II - The Virus Takes Manhattan.
Joey: Hey Chandler. Come on in. Were knitting pot holders.
JOEY: One of the virus victims called in sick, so Cathy recommended me and boom, I'm dying on the gurney. Oh Ross, Marcel just finished his last scene if you want to go down there and say goodbye.
RICHARD: Uh, they're not in it.
Joey: (squinting his eyes) Are you kiddin'? I think I just saw a bat in the corner!
Chandler: How can I not be upset? Okay? I finally fall in love with this fantastic woman and it turns out that she wanted you first!
MONICA and ROSS: In the bank.
ROSS: You were in a porno?
MONICA: Hey, you got me, put it in.
Eric: Come in, Im so glad youre here.
Joey: Hey, best man number two, Joey Tribbiani. Now Im not good with the jokes like Chandler here. Boy...but ahh, I just want to say congratulation to the happy couple. I first met Ross in this coffee house back home...Home...New York City...Where everybody knows my name. Well anyway, I love you guys. (pointing at everyone.) But not as much as I love America. (Looking at Chandler.) Could we please..go home now?
Ross: (exiting the bathroom) That-that-thats all right, no honey, you take your time sweetie. Ill be right out here. (She slams the door in his face, to the gang) Shes just fixing her makeup.
MONICA: Ya know, Roy saw Star Wars 317 times. His name was in the paper.
(Sick Bastard sits down in a chair that enables him to look around the screen and stare at Rachel.)
JOEY: Yeah, that was a tricky one. In reality, that operation takes like, over 10 hours, but they only showed it for 2 minites.
MONICA: [walks up to Rachel in front of the TV] Tonight?
Fake Monica: Monica, I started my day by peeing in front of twenty-five other women, and you're worried about who's gonna take you to the Big Apple Circus?
ROSS: Oh, mine too. Isn't that neat, scotch neat. Would you excuse me? [walks out in the hallway, Mr. Greene is walking out of Chandler and Joey's apartment] Hey, hey, where you uh, sneakin off to mister?
[Cut to the city street. Monica and Chandler are jogging. Chandler is lagging behind so he hops in a cab and takes off, leaving Monica behind]
[Scene: Joey's Bedroom, he and Melanie are in bed together.]
The Fan: No-no, it was! She was in Sex Toy Story 2, Lawrence of Alabia, and I got her autograph! The guys at the comic book store arent gonna believe this! (Exits.)
CHAN: [in phone] So, Spock actually hugs his father?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Joey are sitting in their recliners watching TV. Monica, Ross, and Phoebe are there.]
[Rachel and Ross go out in the hall]
MONICA: Good, they feel good, in my head.
Chandler: (standing in the door of the fridge) Well, I dont have to break up with her this time. Were not involved! Im going to do a pre-emptive strike! Im going to end it with her before it starts. My ass is like frozen! (Closes the fridge.)
Rachel: Well, youve been here for two months now and your boss is required to hand in a performance evaluation. But yknow, there is one thing that I have yet to evaluate. (She turns around and sweeps the stuff off of her desk and hops up onto it.)
Ross: (to the crowd in the laundromat) All right, show's over. Nothing to see here. (to Rachel) Ok, let's do laundry.
CHANDLER: Because I didn't know how to tell him that I couldn't go to the Knicks game.� So, I just told him that I had to stay in Tulsa.
[Scene: An Emergency Room, Chandler and Joey are leading Ross in.]
(Nina gasps in surprise and relief.)
(The sitcom begins with its familiar refrain, yet with a Latin lilt. Rachel and Monica do a little dance with their chopsticks, and Phoebe has to grin as Ross joins in the rhythm.)
PHOEBE: [Mrs. Adelman's voice] In my day, divorce was not an option.
Monica: No, look, she's obviously unstable, okay? I mean she's thinking about running out on her wedding day. (Rachel slowly turns and glares at her.) (Realizing what she just said.) Okay, fine! But I mean, look at the position she's putting him in! What's he gonna do? Ross is gonna run over there on the wedding day and break up the marriage?! I mean, who would do that?! (Rachel again turns and glares at her in disgust.) Okay, fine, all right, but that's y'know, it's different! Although it did involve a lot of the same people.
ROSS: Hey you. [they stand together in front of the TV.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Ross are standing in the kitchen. Ross is filling out a check]
ERICA: How did you get here so fast, I just saw you in Salem?
Monica: And when I told her that I was gonna be moving in with Chandler, she was really supportive. (To Rachel) (Starts to cry) You were so great. You made it so easy. And now you have to leave. And I have to live with a boy!! (They both break down in tears.)
FRIEND: Well, you kids take the train in?
MRS. GELLER: Sooo, Richard's shopping in the junior section.
JOEY: Yeah, can you see me in a place like this?
DIRECTOR'S ASSISTANT: The one in the director's chair.
TATTOO ARTIST: Alright, blonde girl, you're in room two, not so blonde girl, you're with me.
Prospective nanny: (in a sweet, caring voice) I think that's really smart. The easier we can make the transition for her, the better. (Ross and Rachel seem pleased with the answer.)
(She hears another signal in another direction.)
(The apartment manager hung up on him and he hangs up the phone and throws in on the chair. Joey motions, "What the hell was that?" Chandler makes a face to say, "Think about it." Joey tries to divide 136 by 13; he's confused. Suddenly, light dawns on yonder dunder head. He gets it.)
CHANDLER: Well it wouldn't kill you to say it once in a while.
Monica: Do I go horseback riding in the park? Do I take classes at the New School?
[Scene: Elizabeth's apartment; Elizabeth is inquiring as to the delay in Ross's exit from her bathroom.]
Joey: Oh and (Ross begins to open the door and Joey says some gibberish word to indicate to Ross that hes not done yet. Ross closes the door again.) Okay, and uh if anyone needs help pretending to like it, I learned something in acting class, try uh, rubbing your stomach (Rubs his stomach) or uh, or saying mmm and uh, oh oh! And smiling (Smiles while pretending to stir a bowl), okay?
Rachel: No Mon, you want to put them in concentric circles. I want to do this.
(Rachel picks up their phone and the ringing stops. As she talks on the phone, an elaborate visual gag is spun out which is too difficult to describe in words.)
MONICA: Upstairs in the bathroom right before you felt up mom.
Chandler: Now, do I get to look at this book or is it just for people who are actually involved in the wedding?
[Cut to the casino, a very drunk and doodled on Rachel is walking arm in arm with an equally drunk and doodled on Ross are walking through the casino and greeting people on their way through. Ross has some whiskers and his nose colored in, along with his name on his forehead.]
Monica: You had sex in his chair?!... I said that a little too loudly, didn't I?
Rachel: Yeah, ohh! Why, damnit, why did I open my mouth? (In a girlish voice) I have a crush on you; I am attracted to you. (Back to normal again) Gee, I-I know that I freaked him out
MONICA: Jean-Claude Van Damme. I didn't know he was in this movie, he is so hot.
Rachel: Sup.. You want to talk supportive? You didn't even come and visit me when I was in the hospital having the baby.
[Monica goes in the bathroom]
Chandler: Yeah I even (pause) got a ring. (Puts in on the center cushion.) Did you get a ring?
(Mike opens the door and there is a gigantic ice sculpture standing in the doorway)
Chandler: Wait a minute, its perfect. We got a lot of time to kill and were in a building thats full of beds!
Joey: All right! Now hey, I need to use the bathroom. Since I dont need any assistance in there, take a break!
Chandler: Y'know, if you're gonna work late, I could look in on him for you.
{Transcribers Note: This is an hour-long special episode. Which means that the first part of this episode is episode 615. The second part of this episode is episode 616. Since episodes 615 and 616 are combined into one file, thats why there is no episode 616 in the season 6 table of contents and the numbers jump from episode 615 to 617.}
JOEY: I'm sorry, it's the pigs. they're reluctant to get in the blankets!
Chandler: Excuse me, look, we've been here for over an hour, and a lot of people less sick than my friend have gone in. I mean, that guy with the toe thing? Who's he sleeping with? (She slides the gladd panel over and Chandler talks through it in a loud voice.) Oh, c'mon Dora, don't be mad... I know we both said some things we didn't mean, but that doesn't mean we still don't love each other. (To the waiting room.) Y'know, I feel like I've lost her.. (She slides the panel back, he turns, and it takes him by surprise.) Ba-!
MONICA: OK, wait, wait, wait, wait. You know what? Ross, let's - let's switch places. You get in the middle. No un-, ya know, unless this looks like we're trying to cover something up.
[Marcel is driven off in a limo]
JOEY: No I just uh, thought you liked your eggs with the bread with the hole in the middle, a-la me.
JOEY: Okay.� Great.� I'll see you when you get here.� I'm gonna wait out in the hall in case the dude comes out.
Phoebe: (whispers) In the cab, on the way over, Steve blazed up a doobie.
David: Uh no, I have to go in a few hours. I have to be on the red-eye. Well listen, yknow, next time youre in Minsk umm
Joey: (To Ross) Uh, Rachel's here, so good luck man, let me know how it works out. (He hangs up the phone and strands Ross in the bathroom.)
ROSS: Wha-, you have a phone in here?
Joey: You got pregnant for funny?! Dina if hes funny laugh! All right, Ill be back in a little while! You stay here!
Phoebe: Joey, you can't make someone do something they don't want to do. Believe me, there's something I've been trying to get Mike to do in bed and there's... he's just...
Ross: (in his head) Oh my God! That's Rachel naked! I can't look at that! I am looking at this. (Looks back at his book.) Okay, vivid colors, expressive brush strokesUnless she wants me to be looking at that. She knows I'm home. She knows I can see her. What kind of game is she playing? I think maybe someone's lonely tonight. Oh-ho, Dr. Geller! Stop it! You're being silly! Or, am I?
CHANDLER: Oh, oh, c'mon in.
Chandler: Thank you, Mister Drunken Gambler! Okay, you get this and uh, we get the biggest suite in the place! (Everyone cheers) Wait-wait-wait-wait! We (motions to Monica and him.) get the biggest suite in the place.
Janice: Oh, are you sure? Really? Because you know, you could make little puppets out of them, and you could use them in your theater of cruelty.
MRS GREEN: So, what do you think of my daughter in the apron with the big job?
Rachel: "Oh my God, I cant find a boyfriend! So I guess Ill just stumble across the hall and sleep with the first guy I find in there!"
Chandler: Coffee in a fight! (Does the laugh again.)
RACHEL: Pie in the hood, pie in the hood. Go.
JOEY: Right. Goodbye Erica, good luck in Salem. Take care
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Richard are in Monica's bedroom.]
Monica: When girls hang out, we dont have pillow fights in our underwear. (Chandler gets a hurt look on his face.) Im sorry. We do. We do. I dont know why I said that.
CHANDLER: Well they were chair-shaped cows. They never would have survived in the wild.
[Ross and Rachel are in Rachel's bedroom]