words in movies
Mac: Well, I couldnt have done it without you buddy. Youre a genius.
C.H.E.E.S.E: Oh yeah? Well then how come I cant get my VCR to stop blinking 12:00?
Monica: And I have costumes.
Ross: Oh great! That means Im stuck with, "So, we were watching you in there (Points to the TV) and you were sittin right here! Whoa!"
Phoebe: I dont know. I dont know. I cant lie to him again. Oh no Ino! Im just gonna press my breasts up against him.
Rachel: (entering, excitedly) Oh! Hi you guys, oh my God! Youll never gonna believe happened to me today! I am sitting in my office and
Rachel: Okay, so anyway Im sittin in my office and guess who walks in.
Joey: Im gonna be on two TV shows!
Monica: Im so happy for you!
Rachel: I gotI get a big pay raise!
Joey: Ill be playing Drake Remorays twin brother, Stryker!
Rachel: I get to hire my own assistant!
Joey: (jumps up) WellI got a head rush from standing up to fast right there.
Rachel: Okay, well this is all very impressive Hilda, um I just have one last question for you. Uh, how did I do? Was this okay?
Rachel: Ive never interviewed anyone before. Ive actually never had anyone work for me before. Although when I was a kid, we did have a maid, but this is-this isnt the same thing.
Rachel: No. Yeah, and I know that. All right, well thank you so much for coming in it was nice to meet you.
Rachel: All right. (Hilda exits) Im a total pro!
Rachel: (seeing him) Wow! H-umm! Hi! Yes, uh Im sorry the models are actually down the hall.
Man: Actually, Im here about the assistant job.
Tag: I know I havent worked in an office before, and I really dont have a lot of experience, but uh
Rachel: Oh come on, what are you talking about? Youve got three years painting houses. Two whole summers at T.G.I. Fridays, come on!
Tag: Its lame, I know. But Im a goal-oriented person, very eager to learn
Rachel: Okay, hold on just a second. (She grabs a camera out of the desk and takes his picture.) Im sorry, its for human resources, everybody has to do it. Could you just stand up please?
Phoebe: (To Monica) Anyway, I should go. Okay, bye.
Monica: I cant tell you. Its a secret.
Chandler: No Im serious, we should tell each other everything. I do not have any secrets from you.
Chandler: Oh no-no, I cant do that.
Monica: If you tell me, Ill tell you what Phoebe said.
Chandler: So, Ross and I are going to Disneyland and we stop at this restaurant for tacos. And when I say restaurant, I mean a guy, a hibachi, and the trunk of his car. So Ross has about 10 tacos. And anyway, were on Space Mountain and Ross starts to feel a little iffy.
Chandler: Thats it?! I gave up my Disneyland story for that?
Chandler: (angrily) Did she call? You-you told her I was sick right? Always tell her I am sick!
Rachel: No, I-I just dont know how you decide who to hire. I mean Ive got it narrowed down to two people. One of them has great references and a lot of experience and then theres this guy
Rachel: I love him. Hes so pretty I wanna cry! I dont know what to do. Tell me what to do.
Rachel: Uh-huh. No, I hear what youre saying and-and-and that makes a lot of sense but can I just say one more thing? (Takes out his picture.) Look how pretty!
Rachel: Okay youre right. Ill hire Hilda tomorrow. Dumb old perfect for the job Hilda!
Joey: (looking between the pages and him) Audition? I thought you were gonna offer me the part.
Joey: Well, I was Dr. Drake Remoray, Strykers twin brother. I mean, who looks more me than me right?
Joey: Yknow Terry, I-I dont really need to do this. I got my own cable TV series, (Pause) with a robot.
Terry: Im sorry Joey thats thats the way it is.
Joey: Well. I guess you think youre pretty special huh? Sittin up here in your fancy small hall building. Makin stars jump through hoops for ya, huh? Well yknow what? (Throws the script away) This is one star whos hoop This is a star that the hoopthis hoopI was Dr. Drake Remoray!
Tag: I just wanted to come by and thank you for not laughing in my face yesterday. And I noticed there arent any plants in your office so I wanted to bring you your first (Notices her plant) There is a plant in your office.
Tag: Right. So I guess I shouldnt put good at noticing stuff on my resume. (Sets the plant down on her desk.)
Tag: Anyway, Im guessing you hired somebody.
Rachel: But I hired you!
Tag: I am?!
Tag: I cant believe it!
Rachel: Me either. Umm, all right, first thing I need you to do is go downstairs and find a women named Hilda and tell her to go home.
Monica: I made you a surprise.
Monica: Yeah, tacos! Ever since you told me that story Ive had such a craving for them.
Ross: Oh, nothin much. Just trying to figure out what Im gonna do for dinner.
Ross: Eh, either way Ill pass. (Quietly to Chandler) I still cant eat those. (Monica is getting something out of the fridge and starts laughing.) Whats so funny?!
Monica: (trying not to laugh) Im not laughing.
Ross: (To Monica) Look, okay-okay I had food poisoning! Its not like I choose to do it! Its not likeIts not like I said, "Umm, what would make this ride more fun?!"
Monica: Youre right. I mean Im sorry. Yeah, I shouldnt be laughing. I should be laying down papers for you! (Runs off laughing which gets Chandler laughing.)
Chandler: I had too okay?! Were getting married! Married couples cant keep secrets from one another!
Ross: Well, Chandler and I are in a bar
Ross: And this girl is making eyes at Chandler, okay? So after awhile he-he goes over to her and uh, after a minute or two, I see them kissing. Now, I know what youre thinking, Chandlers not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls, and youre right, Chandlers not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls.
Ross: Oh Mon, I laughed so hard
Rachel: Oh, my-my new assistant has very happy that I hired my new assistant.
Joey: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Oh hey! Can you, can you hang on a second? (To Phoebe and Rachel) Its the producers over at Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. can you excuse me for a minute? (On phone) Hey, funny you should call. I was just looking over next weeks script. (Listens) Canceled?! (Listens) Like theyre taking it off the air? (Listens) Ohh. (Listens) All right, see you Monday. (Listens) Were not even shootin them anymore?!! (Listens) All right, bye! (Hangs up) They canceled Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E!
Rachel: Im sorry Joey.
Monica: Ohh, Im sorry I couldnt think of anymore for Ross!
Joey: How could this happen to me?! Yesterday I had two TV shows! Today, I got nothin!
Joey: Well maybe I got a little upset and maybe I told them where they could go.
Tag: (shyly) Nobody. I was just practicing.
Rachel: Yeah, this is Tag. Tag, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, can I see you for a second? (Goes into office.)
Rachel: All right I know, I know how it looks Pheebs, but Im telling you
Rachel: Yes, I know that. I know that. And I know that hiring him was probably not the smartest thing that Ive ever done. But Im telling you, from this moment on I swear this is strictly professional. (Theres a knock on the door.) Yes?
Terry: Joey Tribbiani! Im surprised your big head could fit through our small halls! (Gets up) I gotta go Joey.
Joey: Wait! Terry! WaitLookWait I-I Look, Im really sorry about before. I was an idiot thinking Im too big to audition for you. You gotta give me another chance.
Terry: I cant help you Joey.
Joey: Wait! Terry! Please! Look, I just lost my other job. Okay? You have no idea how much I need this. Please, help me out, for old times sake.
Joey: (jumping up and removing the bandages) Im back baby! Ha-ha-ha!
Monica: I dont know! Time to kiss a guy maybe?! (Ross laughs.) What are you laughing at Pampers? (He stops laughing and glares at her.)
Chandler: Yknow when I said that because were getting married that we should share everything and not have any secrets?
Monica: Then, Id steer clear of Phoebe.
Ross: Man! (Monica mouths, "Im sorry.")
Chandler: Yeah, and not that you would, but I wouldnt hang out with all the guys in my office.
Tag: I got asked out twice today when I was at lunch by guys.
Tag: Yeah. Did you tell someone that I was gay?
Tag: But Im not gay. And I especially wouldnt want you to think I was gay.
Tag: I dont think I should say.
Rachel: Ohh, you can say. Come on, I dont want you to feel like you cant tell me things. (Motions for him to sit down.)
Tag: Id love to ask out your friend Phoebe.
Phoebe: Ahh, toilet seat covers! Is that what you were doing while I was getting gas?
Ross: Well this, this is too much, I feel like I should get you another sweater.
Wendy: Naah... I couldn't leave you alone.
Phoebe: Okay, here I wish you health and happiness. (She hands Monica a cookie in a plastic baggie.)
Chandler: It is. Did I... not tell you about her?
Chandler: I sent them home.
Chandler: Ahh, Merry Christmas; I miss you guys!
Monica: Alright, well, maybe I should let you and the second prettiest girl in Oklahoma get back to work.
Chandler: I don't know!
Joey: Hey Monica its Joey. Listen uh, Phoebe and I smell gas comin from your apartment.
Ross: Yeah. You see my-my sister makes these amazing turkey sandwiches. Her secret is, she puts a, an extra slice of gravy soaked bread in the middle; I call it the Moist Maker. Anyway, I-I put my sandwich in the fridge over here
Richard: on the rocks with a twist? I remember. (Goes to make her drink.)
Chandler: I mean, you were the most beautiful woman in the room tonight!
Monica: I know, I just thought it would be fun.
Chandler: I know.
Chandler: You kidding? You're the most beautiful woman in most rooms... (She jumps up and kisses him.) (Breaking the kiss.) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What's going on? You and I just made out! You and I are making out?
Chandler: Well I think it's safe to say that our friendship is effectively ruined.
The Director: Look Joey, theres nothing I can do. Besides, youre probably gonna be out by four anyway. Weve just got one short scene. Its just you and Richard, and God knows hes a pro. Youll be fine. (Walks away and sees Richard entering.) Morning Richard.
Chandler: Y'know, I sensed that I should stop. So we're okay?
Phoebe: All right, Im gonna close my eyes and point to someone, and you, whoever I point has to come up with something fun for us to do, and we have to do it.
Monica: You're so efficient. I love you!
Monica: I think you're better than you think you are.
Monica: I can't get married until I get something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.
Chandler: I don't think so.
Chandler: Look, I thought about it too, and I'm sorry. I think we should spend all of the money on the wedding.
Joey: (looks at a girl walk in) see ordinarily I would talk to her, but my confidence is shaken did I sleep with her? Did I not sleep with her?
Monica: I love you. (They kiss.)
Rachel: Well of course I do! But yknow, favorite returning character is a tough category Joey. I mean youre up against the guy who survived his own cremation.
Chandler: I love you so much.
Chandler: Yes! And thats why Im under the table. Celebrating.
Monica: No, I want everything that you just said. I want a marriage.
ALISON: Oh, my major was totally useless. I mean, how often do you look in the classifieds and see "Philosopher wanted"?
Rachel: (flinches) Ross! Come on! That's all right! Fine--Okay, I have a weird thing about my eye. Can we not talk about it please?
Chandler: I wanted to be with you. I missed you so much.
Chandler: I never want to leave you again!
Monica: No, I think that this is what you wanna do, I think it's great!
Chandler: (realizing) I have *not* thought this through!
Chandler: Turns out they can't fire me. Because I quit.
Chandler: I know, I, I should have talked to you first about it.
Bob: Toby! Im not gonna let you cover for him. Anything you say right now will just get me more upset with Chandler!
Rachel: Wha... are you kidding? I can't return this.
Monica: Chandler, please dont think I was trying to pressure you. Phoebe and Rachel
Chandler: I don't have a *job*!
Rachel: Oh, yknow I'm not that much of a sweet tooth. I(Chandler puts a forkful of the cheesecake in her mouth.)Wow. My God, so creamy. Oh my God, this is the best cheesecake I have ever had. Where did you get this? (She reaches over to look at the label on the box.)
Ms. McKenna: Boston is down, Atlanta is down, Houston is down, I could go on and on but instead of boring you Ill go straight to my forty two point plan.
Ross: Oh, I can't tell you how great it was to look at the crowd and see your face! I mean... uh, did you know you were (giggles) mouthing the words along with me?
Rachel: Am I the only one who doesn't think that she's hot? Ross?
Ross: Dr. Gettleman? Yeah I know, I don't think that's a good idea. In fact, I think he's dead.
Ross: All right Emily, as much as I love you, I'm sorry, I can't move to London without Ben.
ROSS: Bye Marcel. See ya on the big screen. You keep people drinkin' that beer, OK. I miss you buddy.
Monica: No, no, no, I don't make chocolate pies. When I was younger I-I enter in this pie-eating contest. I ate so many that just the thought of them made me sick.
Monica: Oh my God! You cleaned! (Gasps) Look at these floors! You did the windows! Oh, I have been begging you for months and you did! You cleaned! And nagging works!
Rachel: I was giving you an appology and you were totally checking her out!
Gavin: I thought it was ok when you slept with your old assistant Tag.
Part I Written by: Michael Borkow Part II Teleplay by: Shana Goldberg-Meehan & Scott Silveri Part II Story by: Jill Condon & Amy Toomin Part I Transcribed by: Eric Aasen Part II Transcribed by: Aaron D. Miller
Gavin: Why do you even care if I was looking at her? Are you jealous?
Joey: Man, I wish I had a nanny like you.
CHANDLER: So, when I woke up this morning, he'd stolen all the insoles out of my shoes.
Rachel: (to Joey) Hey, listen, Joey, about Molly, I really prefer if you didn't go after her.
Joey: Oh, man, why did have to go and say that for? Now that you told me I can't have it makes me want her even more!
Joey: Well, I didnt realize until I got home. I wasnt gonna walk all the way back down here with one shoe! Yknow what? Im gonna go find that guys car and leave a note on the windshield. (Goes to do so.)
MONICA: Oh I was just doing Chandler's side of the conversation.� You know, like, "Hi, How do I look?"� (As Chandler) "Really sexy.� Could I BE any more turned on?"
Phoebe: I don't know, I kinda like Bob for a girl.
Mike: I don't know but they don't sound like spa treatments. You have to get rid of it!
Mike: OK, I don't want to freak you out or anything, but I think I just saw a rat in your cupboard.
Chandler: Oh. You mind if I join you?
Ross: I am, yes.
Joey: Actually, that will be long. You know, I really need to organize my thoughts.
Joey: Allright, fine, I only have one thought! It's about the hot nanny, I gotta see her!
Chandler: I'm afraid I can't let you do that, Joe.
Chandler: Yes, as a matter of fact he did, so I can't let you go.
Rachel: Um, excuse me Gavin, I have a question I need to ask you.
Rachel: I was faking it! Can't you tell when I'm being fake?
Phoebe: Me too. Although this city is my home, so. So thats dumb what I said, dont tell him I said that. Umm, you make something up. (Mischa does so and Sergei kisses her hand.) Nice, (to Mischa) thank you. This is me. Here.
Joey: Hey Rach, so can I sing happy birthday to you now?
Ross: Where the hell are Joey and Molly? I asked you to watch them.
Joey: Oh, I didn't go to college.
Chandler: She doesnt know. Says she loves us both. Y'know I woke up this morning and I was in love, well I was happy. Y'know it serves me right for buying that twelve pack of condoms. And now I cant even return them, because she choked on the reciept!
Joey: I wanna be mr. Wigglemunch. (and makes a "there" nod to Ross)
Ross: Ok ... (they leave the room, long pause) Well, uh, Joey, I guess we have no problem.
Rachel: Oh, great! Well, then I'm gonna take Emma to see him. I wonder why Ross said that he died.
Ross: Okay umm, why dont we all take a seat, yknow? And uh, and Ill get us all some uh some coffees(He goes to pull out Elizabeths chair, but Paul steps in)Yeah, why dont you. (Paul pulls out her chair) Uh and you guys can talk about whatever, whatever you want. Yknow? Whatever pops into your head. (He turns his back to Paul and Elizabeth and points to himself for Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe. Then he goes to order the coffee.)
Mike: No, I think you're sweet.
Nurse: Yes, I see that here. Unfortunately we cant guarantee a private room and currently theyre all unavailable.
Larry: Well, I suppose I could give him a warning.
Rachel: Hi. Thanks for the party, honey. Should I help you clean up?
Rachel: Okay fine, I did. But I didnt see anything, I swear.
Monica: No way! You had your party, now I have mine! Is everything alright?
Chandler: Im not great at the advice, can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? Some cheese?
ROSS: Can I ask you somethin'?
Gavin: I really mean it.
Chandler: Okay, its just weird! Okay? I dont want to be standing their saying my vows and then having the mental image of you and Monica! I-I-I need I dont know what I need. I need a walk.
Rachel: No thats just(Laughs)Thats just cause Im such a good messer!
Joey: Boy I tell ya, this little talent came in handy before I could afford porn.
Phoebe: Listen, I think I've left something here.
Gavin: I do have feelings for you.
Ross: OK! Last night after the party I saw Rachel kissing that jerk from her office out on your balcony.
David: Hey! Oh, I was just about to leave. I-I-I-I didnt think you were coming.
Phoebe: (likes the jacket) No, but I like it. I think I left one of my rat babies.
Chandler: Oh, uh, well, I haven't seem it but if I do I'll let you know.