words in movies
Part I Written by: Greg Malins Part II Written by: David Crane & Marta Kauffman Parts I & II Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Joey: No, I-I just heard lunch. But yeah, I can go. Sure! (They all exit.)
Ross: (To Chandler) Yknow what? Actually Im kinda glad theyre leaving cause uh, I need to talk to you about something.
Chandler: Listen, if you want to borrow money, its kind of a bad time. Im buying dinner for 128 people tomorrow night.
Ross: No, its Its not that. Umm, now what Im going to say to you, Im not saying as your friend. Okay? Im-Im saying as it as Monicas older brother.
Chandler: Do I still call you Ross?
Ross: Okay! You guys are getting married tomorrow and-and I couldnt be more thrilled for both of you, but as Monicas older brother I-I have to tell you this. If you ever hurt my little sister, if you ever cause her any unhappiness of any kind, I will hunt you down, and kick your ass! (Chandler laughs.) What? Im-Im-Im serious! (Chandler laughs harder.) ComeHey! Dude! Stop it! Okay? Im-Im not kidding here!
Chandler: (smiling) Hey, I hear what your saying, okay? And, thanks for the warning.
Monica: Im making a list of all the things that are most likely to go wrong at the wedding. Now, that way I can be prepared.
Monica: Well, so far I have uh, my brides maids dresses wont get picked up, my veil gets lost, or I dont have my something blue.
Rachel: Hey! Those are all the things Im responsible for!
Monica: I had to go with the odds Rach.
Joey: (entering) Hey! You guys! Remember that audition I had a while ago and didnt get the part?
Joey: Yes thats the one about the soldiers who fight in World War I!
Joey: Well anyway, the guy they wanted backed out and now they want me! I start shooting today!
Joey: Oh no, Ill be done by then.
Joey: I know! All right, Ill see you guys over there! Im off to fight the Nazis.
Rachel: Oh, wait Joey! We fought the Nazis in World War II, not World War I.
Joey: Whoa! Okay. Yeah well, who-who was in World War I? (Rachel pauses as she thinks.)
Monica: Who did we fight in World War I?
Joey: Im doing my scenes with you?
Joey: Wow! I cant believe this! This is incredible. I mean you just won an Oscar!
Richard: No I didnt.
Joey: I think you did.
Richard: I think I lost. Three times.
Richard: No, we still have food in the basement! I saw potatoes and some dry pasta!
Joey: (glances at Richard) No. Nope, I uh I thI thought it might be kind of a cool character thing. Yknow? Hes uh, hes a face toucher. (Behind his back, Richard is nodding no.)
The Director: I dont think so. Lets take it back to Richards last line. (Walks off.) Action!
Richard: We may not have any weapons, but we still have food. In the basement I saw potatoes and some dry pasta, and a few tins of tuna! (Joey backs away and wipes his face again.)
Monica: (laughs) I dont have anything like that, but let me go see if Rachel does.
Chandler: Wait a minute! I have a date tomorrow night.
Monica: I just, I cant believe that we made it!
Monica: Im sorry but nothing.
Monica: Well honestly ever since we got engaged I have been waiting for something to, to flip you out.
Chandler: Yeah. Yknow I keep thinking that something stupid is gonna come up and Ill go all Chandler. But nothing has.
Monica: Ohh, Im so glad. Thank you so much for staying so calm during this. I mean its really, its made me stay calm. (Chandler just looks at her.) I coulda been worse!
Chandler: Okay. Ill be right there.
Ross: (walks up) Wow Monica! Hey, just so you know I had my uh, older brother chat with Chandler.
Ross: Well I I told him that if he ever hurt you I would hunt him down and kick his ass! (The girls all laugh.) What?! What?! What is the matter with everybody?! I am serious! I would kick his ass! (The laugh harder.)
Mrs. Bing: Oh honey! This is so exciting! I thought we screwed you up so bad this day would never come. Oh and just think. Soon therell be lots of little Bings. (He freaks out and loosens the tie again.)
Mr. Geller: What?! Ive never seen one before!
Mr. Geller: I didnt even have a chance to act as though Im okay with it!
Mr. Bing: Yes! Although, I think we may be seeing a little too much of some people. Arent you a little old to be wearing a dress like that?
Rachel: Yeah! But I dont know what he looks like!
Rachel: Man in the black dress (Monica walks away and Rachel looks around to find a woman in a black dress.) (To her) Hi! Im Rachel! Im a friend of Monica and Chandlers!
Woman: Im Amanda.
Rachel: Oh I get it! A man duh!
Ross: (clinking a wine glass) Can I have everyones attention please? Im uh; Im Ross Geller.
Ross: Dad dad, please! As I was saying umm, Im Dr. Ross Geller. Uhh, and Im the best man. And uh, this marriage is doubly special for me umm, because not only is the groom my best friend but uh, the bride is my little sister. And, shes the greatest sister a guy could ask for. So if youd all please join me in raising a glass to the, the couple were here to celebrate. (Everyone does so.) To the Bings.
Monica: All right, Im gonna go steam my wedding dress okay? Who wants the responsibility of making sure nothing happens to it?
Rachel: Ill do it.
Rachel: I said Ill do it!
Monica: Nobody wants to do it? All right, Ill do it myself.
Rachel: Monica! Im not gonna screw it up!
Monica: Yknow what? Youre right, Im sorry. Actually you were a big help tonight. Yeah, and thanks for putting my grandmother in the cab and making sure she got to the hotel safely.
Rachel: Well of course that is what Im here for!
Joey: Thanks. Yeah, I figure if I wear these in my scenes at least I wont get spit in the eyes, yknow?
Ross: And if I remember correctly, Ray Ban was the official sponsor of World War I!
Joey: Great! All right. Ill see you later. (He starts to leave.)
Joey: Uh, I think hes in Rachels room. See ya. (Exits.)
Ross: I think Chandlers gone. (He hands her the note.)
Rachel: (reading the note) Tell Monica Im sorry.
Phoebe: (walking up) Whats up? (Rachel hands her the note and she reads it.) Tell Monica Im sorry. (Pause) Tell her yourself!
Rachel: Yeah but, maybe its not what we think. Maybe its tell Monica Im sorry I drank the last of the milk.
Phoebe: Or maybe he-he was writing to tell her that-that hes changed his name, yknow? Tell Monica Im sorry.
Ross: I think it means he freaked out and left!
Ross: LookOkay, Im just gonnaIm gonna have to go find him and bring him back! Okay? You-you make sure Monica does not find out, okay?
Phoebe: (pointing at Ross) Okay but if you dont find him and bring him back, I am gonna hunt you down and kick your ass!
Ross: (scared) I will, I will find him.
Richard: I found the picture!
Richard: Could you uh, could you lower your script? I need to see your face so I can uh, play off your reaction.
Joey: Okay uh, look I know youre a great actor, okay? And you play all those Shakespeare guys and stuff
Richard: Well of course I am!
Gunther: No. No, I havent seen him.
Gunther: I wasnt invited.
Mrs. Geller: I certainly see what the girls like coming here.
Ross: Yes! No-no! I know, I know what the list is! Mom! Look if you see Chandler, could you just let him know Im looking for him?
Mr. Geller: And if you see Rita Moreno, let her know Im looking for her.
Richard: I found the picture!
Joey: Oh, Im-Im not working tomorrow.
Joey: No! No! I cant! You gotta get me out of it! Ive got plans! (Spits.) Important plans! (Spits on the Ps.)
Monica: (entering from her room, excitedly) Im getting married today!!! (She trips and falls.) (Getting up) I think I just cracked a rib. But I dont care because todays my wedding day! My day is finally here!! (Runs back into her room.)
Monica: (re-entering) Im gonna start getting ready! (Goes back into her room.)
Rachel: Im sorry. Im sorry. Its just Its just so sad!
Rachel: I know. I know. Oh God. (Looking around) Theres no tissue! Can you grab me some toilet paper?
Phoebe: No-no! I-I I found one.
Rachel: Oh thank you! (Wiping her nose.) Oh God! (She throws it out.) Can I have another one?
Rachel: Oh God I just can not imagine what is gonna happen if Chandler doesnt show up!
Rachel: Oh, I mean shes gonna be at the wedding waiting for him and people will be whispering, "Oh that poor girl." Yknow? Then shell have to come back here and live all alone.
Phoebe: There was a pregnancy test in the garbage, and its positive. Monicas pregnant. (Rachel covers her mouth.) So I guess she wont be totally alone.
Phoebe: I know! Monicas gonna have a baby! Hey, can this count as her something new?
Rachel: No, she had to have just taken that test because I took out the trash last night.
Phoebe: Oh God, this is turning into the worst wedding day ever! The bride is pregnant. The groom is missing. And Im still holding this. (She throws the test back into the trash.)
Ross: No! I talked to Joey on the set, he hasnt heard from him. I-I-I talked to Chandlers parents again!
Ross: No! I made it seem like I was just calling to chat. Pretty sure, they both think Im interested in them.
Ross: Well, cant you at least stall her a little? Ill-Ill go back to some of the places I went last night.
Phoebe: Okay. Im going with you.
Rachel: All right, Ill see you guys later.
Rachel: Ill figure something out.
Monica: Hey! Okay, so I thought wed start with my make up and then do my hair.
Rachel: Okay uh, but before you do that. I-I, I need you to talk to me.
Rachel: Umm Im never gonna getting married!
Rachel: No Monica! Im serious! Oh, maybe I should just forget about it. Become a lesbian or something.
Rachel: Well maybe it would make me feel better if I slept with Joey.
Joey: Excuse me, Aaron? (The director turns around.) Hi! Umm, I have a little problem with the schedules. Originally, I wasnt supposed to work today, and I have this wedding that I really have to be at. Its my best friends, and Im officiating so I really cant work past four.
Joey: Im having surgery!
Joey: Yeah, I-I just made up the stuff about the wedding because I didnt want you to worry about me. But, Im having surgery today.
The Director: Look Joey, theres nothing I can do. Besides, youre probably gonna be out by four anyway. Weve just got one short scene. Its just you and Richard, and God knows hes a pro. Youll be fine. (Walks away and sees Richard entering.) Morning Richard.
Richard: Im wearing two belts.
Chandler: How did you guys find me? I knew I shouldve hid at the gym!
Chandler: Panicking! And using the Internet to try to prove that Im related to Monica. How is she?
Chandler: No! No! No! I cant do that!
Chandler: Because if I go home, were gonna become the Bings! I cant be the Bings!
Chandler: Its not just their marriage! I mean, look at yours. Look at everybodys! The only person that can make marriage work is Paul Newman! And Ive met me; I am not Paul Newman. I dont race cars! I dont make popcorn! None of my proceeds go to charity.
Phoebe: But look Chandler, right now, no one has a lower opinion of you than I do. But I totally believe you can do this.
Chandler: I want to. I love her so much, but Im afr Its too huge.
Monica: (interrupting) The days and nights are hard! I get it! Okay? Look umm, Rachel Im sorry! I have to start getting ready! Im getting married today!
Rachel: I know. At dusk. Thats such a hard time for me.
Monica: (getting up) Im gonna go put my make up on, we have to be at the hotel in an hour! (Starts for the bathroom.)
Monica: I cant go to lunch!!
Rachel: Oh good God! Ive fallen down! (She trips and falls.)
Rachel: Okay. All right. (Gets up.) Honey listen. When I tell you what Im about to tell you, I need you to remember that we are all here for you and that we love you.
Phoebe: (entering) Found the vest! I mean were gonna have to keep an eye on it, yknow make sure we dont lose it again
Monica: Oh wow! Okay. Dont scare me like that okay? I mean for a minute there I was like, "Oh my God! The worst has happened!"
Joey: I would sooner die in this hellhole then see her back with you!
Joey: Look, my best friends are getting married in like an hour. Okay? And Im the minister. Please! Please! Can you pull it together?
Richard: Of course! Im-Im sorry. I-Id hate you to miss anything like that on account of me. I can do this!
Joey: I would sooner die in this hellhole then see her back with you!
Monica: I wanna wear this everyday.
Monica: (starting to cry) Im so happy for me.
Joey: Im still on the set!
Joey: I know! Im sorry! The guys drunk, they wont let me go until we get this.
Rachel: Oh my God! Im gonna have to find another minister.
Joey: No! No, Im the minister! All right, look-look, put em both on the phone, Ill marry them right now.
Rachel: Ugh! Joey, I have to go.
Joey: Hey! Dont you hang up on me! Ill marry you and me right now! I have the power!
Ross: Im telling you, just a little bit at a time.
Chandler: Ross, I am not gonna run away again! I just want to get a little fresh air.
Rachel: Well Phoebe, we gotta do something! (They turn the corner.) Well, yknow. I mean theres no way Joeys gonna make it in time. So Im gonna through the hotel and see if theres any other weddings going on.
Rachel: Anastassakis/Papasifakis wedding, excellent! {Its a good thing Jennifer Aniston is Greek, because she had to pronounce those names. Luckily for me, they were written on a sign.}(The happy couple emerges.) Congratulations. (To the best man and maid of honor) Mazel Tov! (The rabbi emerges.) Hi! Oh, great hat. (Hes wearing an interesting hat and she takes him over to talk.) Listen umm, I need you to perform another wedding. Can you do that?
The Rabbi: I dont know. Are they Greek Orthodox?
Mr. Geller: I thought he was with you.
Mrs. Bing: As I recall when we got married, I saw the groom in the wedding dress.
Monica: I know! Hey, hows Chandler doin?
Ross: Uh Phoebe, can I see you for a second?
The Director: Im sorry Joey, as long as hes here and hes conscious were still shooting.
Joey: So I uh, I just talked to the director. Thats it, were done for the day.
Joey: So I got your car, its right outside.
Ross: Hiiii-Ya!! (Chandler lies back down.) Im serious! Youre not walking out on my sister!
Chandler: (standing up) Thats right! Im not!
Chandler: I know about Monica.
Chandler: Yeah, I heard you and Rachel talking.
Chandler: Well I was! Then I went down to the gift shop because I was out of cigarettes
Chandler: Big picture please! So I was in the gift shop, and thats when I uh, saw this. (He holds up a little, tiny baby jumper that reads I (heart) New York.) Yeah, yknow what? I thought anything that can fit into this, cant be scary.
Chandler: But come on, look at how cute and small this is! So I got it to give Monica so shed know I was okay.
Mr. Geller: Way to go son! I knew youd find him!
Chandler: You look beautiful mom. (His dad clears his throat.) You look beautiful too dad. I love you both. (He kisses his dad on the cheek) Im so glad you here. (He kisses his mom.)
Ross: Ive never walked down the aisle knowing it cant end in divorce.
Mrs. Geller: Oh I wish youre grandmother had lived to see this.
Mr. Geller: I love you sweetheart. (He kisses her and they sit down.)
The Rabbi: I am Father Kalebasous.
Joey: (entering) Thats my line! (He walks up the aisle and to the rabbi) I can take it from here, thanks. (To all) Dearly beloved, Im sorry Im a little late. You may be confused by this now, (Hes still in costume) but you wont be Memorial Day weekend 2002. Well, lets get started before the groom takes off again. Huh? (Monica is shocked and looks around.) We are gathered here today, to join this man and this woman in the bonds of holy matrimony. Ive known Monica and Chandler for a long time, and I can not imagine two people more perfect for each other. And now, as Ive left my notes in my dressing room. We shall proceed to the vows. Monica?
Monica: Chandler, for so long I I wondered if I would ever find my prince, my soul mate. Then three years ago, at another wedding I turned to a friend for comfort. And in stead, I found everything that Id ever been looking for my whole life. And now here we are with our future before us and I only want to spend it with you, my prince, my soul mate, my friend. Unless you dont want to. You go!
Chandler: (To Ross) No, thats okay. (Ross nods and retreats.) Monica I thought this was going to be the most difficult thing I ever gonna had to do. But when I saw you walking down that aisle I realized how simple it was. I love you. Any surprises that come our way its okay, because I will always love you. You are the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with. You wanna know if Im sure? (He leans in and kisses her.)
Joey: You may not kiss the bride. So, I guess by the powers vested in my by the state of New York and the Internet guys, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Oh wait! Do you take each other?
Chandler: I do.
Monica: I do.
Joey: We good? Yeah? Good? Once again, I pronounce you husband and wife. (To Chandler) Now kiss her again.
Chandler: (To Monica) I love you. And I know about the baby.
Monica: I didnt take a pregnancy test.
JOEY: I don't know.
Joey: (joins him) I gotta get one, too.
ROSS: Wha--? Whoa, hey, I don't want my birthday to be the source of any kind of negative--there's gonna be a hoopla?
Chandler: I'm still on my first. I just think you're nice.
Rachel: Yeah, I forget which ones.
Ross: I told you it wasn�t long, but there is an amazing connection between us.
Ross: (in his head) Shes your cousin. Shes your cousin! If she knew what was going on in your head shed think you were sick! (She grabs some popcorn.) Or would she? Lets back up a second. She was the one who suggested opening a bottle of wine. She was the one who turned down the lights. She was the one that wanted to rent Logans Run, the sexiest movie ever. (She grabs the blanket from behind him and looks at him.) Oh, I know that look. Forget it. I want it. She wants it. Im going in.
JOEY: Likewise. Uh, I'll take that. [grabs moose hat] It's what I came for. So, this is new. Where'd you two meet?
Young Ethan: Yeah. You do know I was talking about you, right?
Ross: Pa-haa!! I would love to go with you.
Ross: I know, I know I was, but there was always this little voice inside that kept saying it's never gonna happen, move on. You know whose voice that was?
Phoebe: Oh, all right. What did I have?
Phoebe: Oh, no wonder I don't feel full.
Rachel: No, I-I live with Phoebe. I mean youre [pity-tone] alone, alone. And I just-its just not the time for us. Im sorry.
Ross: And Im sure youre gonna make a big impression. Hi! Im Rachel Green. Its nice to meet you. (He lifts his leg and imitates shaking hands with it, just like how Rachel was trying to pick up the aspirin with her feet.) Come on, you probably have a broken rib!
Annabelle: Oh, actually I sorta have plans.
Susan: Oh, I got that for him.
Phoebe: I know, I know. So sweet... and so complicated. And for a shrink, he's not too shrinky, y'know?
Phoebe: I licked my arm, what?
Chandler: Its incredible, I mean one minute shes inside you and then 47 hours later here she is.
Monica: First, I need a boyfriend, then I can have a list.
Ross: I did not freak out.
Joey: Look, I can sense when women are depressed and vulnerable. It's one of my gifts.
Ross: Helen Geller? I don't think so.
Chandler: Okay. (Starts running for the bedroom) Im gonna get the ring! Im gonna get the ring! (Does so) Im gonna go find her and (starts running for the door) Im just going to propose!
Joey: Yeah I guess you're right.
Chandler: Well I just, thought maybe you'd wanna book some time with the best you'd ever had.
Monica: Honey, Im not even going to pretend I was listening. (Sees someone else.) Hey! Hey! (Goes over to that person.)
Monica: I don't know what else to say.
Chandler: Joey if you wanna punch me, go ahead, I deserve it. But I just want you to know that I would never soberly hurt you or your family, youre my best friend. I would never do anything like this ever again.
Monica: I feel terrible, I really do.
Rachel: I love you too. (They hug.)
Monica: You invite my brother, you invite my whole family, and not me?! Why?! WhatWhy wouldnt you want me at your wedding? What could I have possibly done?! (Frannies husband walks up.) Stuart!
Monica: Oh, hi, Ross. Yeah. There's someone I want you to say hi to. (to Chandler) He just happened to call.
Phoebe: Yeah! So--ooh, I gotta ask you though. How did you know where to find me?
Rachel: So. I just thought the two of us should hang out for a bit. I mean, you know, we've never really talked. I guess you'd know that, being one of the two of us, though, right?
Rachel: Okay. Ah, well well just see about that, okay. I will read The Shining, (she tries to take the book away from him but he doesnt want to let it go) and you will read Little Women.
Chandler: Nothing! I said, I said "You're so great" and then I just, I just stopped talking!
Julie: I'd love it too. Shoot, I gotta go. So, I'll talk to you later.
Michelle: Thank you so much for letting me do this. Public bathrooms freak me out, I can't even pee, let alone doanything else.
Ross: It's, it's, it's, uh, a totally diferent situation! It's, it's apples and oranges, it's, it's orthodontists and lesbi- I gotta go.
CHANDLER: I broke up with her.
JOEY: That was a good one. For a second there, I was like, "whoa."
Chandler: You know, I can't believe you. Linda is so great! Why won't you go out with her again?
PHOEBE: I miss Janice though. "Hello, Chandler Bing."
Chandler: I dont think the flash went off.
Rachel: Oh. Oh yeah, dont get to worked up over it. I mean it-it sounds like hes a doctor, but hes not.
Joey: Yeah! And also, a little like a French guy. (They both squint at each other.) I never noticed that before.
JOEY: Check this out. Can I have this?
Ross: Right, I'm gonna go talk to Joey. I think this is the right time. He's always in a good mood after the flight attendant says "duty free".
PHOEBE: See, I didn't know that.
Dr. Franzblau: All right, Carol, I need you to keep pushing. I need(reaches for an instrument, Rachel's hand is on it) Excuse me, could I have this?
Ross: Rain? Hi. Hi, my name is Rain. I have my own kiln, and my dress is made out of wheat.
RACHEL: Yeah, I love that story. Um, I got a question for you guys. Why do people keep is saying that is good to see me up and about?
Chandler: No, no, I keep trying, yknow? I can get out, "Joey, I have too " but then I lose my nerve and I always finish with, " go to the bathroom." He may think Im sick.
PHOEBE: Look, can't we just say that you believe in something, and I don't.
Rachel: Anyway, um, (Gets the ring out of her purse.) I guess this belongs to you. And thank you for giving it to me.
Joey: Oh, hey listen! The Soapies called today and I also get to present an award.
Chandler: Yeah, I thought so to until I paper mached one of my eyes shut.
Woman: Oh, I'm sorry, is that your basket? It's really pretty. Unfortunately, I don't see suds.
Rachel: Okay, listen, I'm thinking, why don't we just tell them who we really are? I mean, it'll be fine, I really think it'll be fine.
Rachel: I don't know. We were watching TV, and then he pooped in Monica's shoe-
Ross: (sigh)....I have to go to China.
Ross: Well, I added the 'exactly like me' part... But she said she's looking for someone, and someone is gonna be there tonight.
JOEY: I don't know, I'm just tryin' to help you out.
Monica: Guys. I thought you were taking Ross to the game?
MONICA: So what, he's a little older, big deal, I mean he's important to me. Ya know if you ask him, he might take you on his Jag. [walks off]
CHANDLER: Yeah, I understand.
Joey: Not from where I was standin.
JANICE: Yes, I am.
Chandler: And you're thinking of taking it? (Pause) So before you said being me with me was more important than any job, but I guess now it's old job, (Raises his hand) me, (Raises his hand) new job.
Rachel: Well, I sorta did a stupid thing last night.
Phoebe: Yes, 'cause now I have to go down there, and deal with them.
Woman: It's okay, it's okay, I'm here, I'm here. Sorry I'm late, okay, here I am. Who's the new tense girl?
Chandler: I got a good one, I got a good one! I once walked in on both my parents making love to the same guy.
RACHEL: I am. Let me just get my coat.
Joey: Oh hey but, before you guys do that (To Rachel) I need to talk to you, and Ross, I need to talk to you.
Monica: No, you were right. I don't have a plan. (There's a knock on the door.)
Mr.Heckles: I could have cats.
Monica: I know, after you left the store, I chose different ones.
MONICA: No. Um, I know you like this, and I want you to have it. I think it'll look good in our apartment.
Joey: Mornin'. (The Hombre man ignores him) I said, mornin'.
Joey: Oh, Im sorry. You wanna bite? (Holds his piece out for him.)
Joey: Aw, come on! It'll be years before I forget you!
Phoebe: Well no, when I get to the point where... you know... I'm ready to hear cruel mocking jokes about Mike... I'm gonna come to you.
GUY: [to Phoebe] I hear you can get people out of here.
Rachel: See, there's always one guy. (Mocking) "If I had a wish, I'd wish for three more wishes." (Joey enters.)
Ross: Oh. Listen, do you think- and try not to let my intense vulnerability become any kind of a factor herebut do you think it would be okay if I asked you out? Sometime? Maybe?
Monica: (Tiny laugh) I am really an idiot. (Tiny laugh) you see, I was filling out my friend's form, and instead of putting her information, (tiny laugh) I put mine.
Rachel: Ill be right there! (to Ross) Okay, Ross, please come on! I thought we have moved on! I thought weve gotten to a place where we could be happy for each other! I mean was that just me?
Ross: Dad, before I was born, did you freak out at all?
MONICA: I can't believe you didn't tell me.
Monica: Carol called me to thank me for the lasagna, I asked, she told me.
PHOEBE: I might have.
Phoebe: Oh, I tasted Ben's milk, and Ross freaked out.
Phoebe: I'm sooo sorry!! I just... I keep thinking about Mike! I'm crazy about David, and we're having so much fun together. Why-Why do I miss Mike? That's-that's gonna go away, right?
MONICA: What have I not told you?
Carol: It's not true. I never called your mother a wolverine.
CHANDLER: I didn't know it was a big secret.
Chandler: Joey! Joe! (Sees that hes not here and starts investigating. He picks up the bag of chips.) Full bag. (He picks up the beer.) Beers still cold. Something terrible mustve happened here! (He decides its not that important; sits down on Rosita, and the back falls off causing him to flip over.) Oh no-no-no-no-no-no! (Runs over to Stevie.) Stevie, I was never here! (Runs out.)