words in movies
Ross: Hey uh Mon, I saw the Porsche parked out front, can I get the keys? Thought Id take that bad boy out for a little spin.
Rachel: Wait a minute! (To Monica) You let Ross drive the Porsche and when I ask you, you say youre the only one whos allowed to drive it.
Joey: Saw the Porsche out there Mon, lookin good. When do I get to take that baby out again?
Phoebe: Ive never driven it! Okay? Not once! Okay once. Okay, I drive it all the time.
Rachel: Wow! I cant believe you lied to me.
Phoebe: Okay, I can fix this! Okay Monica, Rachel thinks all you can talk about is the wedding. (Rachel glares at her.)
Monica: Great! Well Rachel, the reason why I wont let you drive the Porsche is because youre a terrible driver. There! That wasnt about the wedding.
Ross: Look Rach if-if you want to go for a ride in the Porsche Ill be glad to take you for a quick spin around the block.
Rachel: Come on Ross give me the keys! Monica does not know what shes talking about! I am an excellent driver!
Rachel: I think shes checking out your beehive Ross.
Ross: Fine! Yknow what? It doesnt matter, because, if I remember correctly, there is a comb on the floor of the bathroom.
Chandler: Oh! Right. Umm, maybe thats because I didnt send him an invitation.
Chandler: I dont even know the man. Okay? Were not the close. I havent seen him in years.
Chandler: Well he doesnt have to know! Its not like we run in the same circles. I hang out with you guys, and he stars in a drag show in Vegas.
Phoebe: Ooh, I think I wanna trade circles.
Monica: So what! As long as hes not wearing a white dress and a veil I dont care.
Phoebe: Okay, I think I need to do some shopping. (Gets up and leaves.)
Ross: There is no way I am letting you drive this car! So why dont you just hand over the keys?
Ross: No ah-ah-ah! Do not start this car! (She starts the car.) Okay! Okay! I will give you twenty bucks if you get out of this car right now! (He looks for the twenty Rachel stole and doesnt find it.)
Phoebe: Yeah! Sure! Ooh, I left my purse up at Monicas. Ill be right back. (She goes to get it.)
Joey: Wow! Maybe uh, maybe you and I ought to get to know each other a little better.
Man: Sure, Id like that.
Jake: Yeah that would be great! Let me make sure Im not doing anything Tuesday. (He bends over to open his bag, when he does so his pants slide down his butt revealing a pink lace secret.)
Chandler: Are you serious?! I mean like eloping?! No more stupid wedding stuff?! No more these flowers or these flowers or these flowersThink of the money well save!! (Monica just looks at him.) Were not eloping. I love the flowers. Can our wedding be bigger please?
Monica: Were going to Las Vegas to see your dad. Its time you two talked, and I want to get to know my father-in-law.
Chandler: Yknow we already went over this and I won!
Chandler: Look forget it okay? I dont want to go. I dont want to see him. I dont wanna.
Monica: Chandler, look I-I know that your dad embarrassed you. I know
Chandler: No-no all kids are embarrassed by their parents, youd have to come up with a whole new word for what I went through. When I was in High School, he used to come to all of my swim meets dressed as a different Hollywood starlet. Yknow its hard enough to be fourteen. Youre skinny. Youre wearing speedoesThat your mom promised that you would grow into! And you look up into the stands and theres your dad cheering you on dressed as Carmen Miranda. We was wearing a headdress with real fruit that he will later hand out to your friends as a healthy snack!
Chandler: Yeah o-okay, but Im just doing this for you.
Chandler: So I really never get to win anymore?
Joey: Listen, you know how uh, when youre wearing pants and you lean forward I check out your underwear?
Joey: Well, when Jake did it I saw that he was wearing womens underwear!
Phoebe: I know. They were mine.
Phoebe: No, its not! We were just goofing around and I dared him to try them on.
Phoebe: Im wearing his briefs right now.
Phoebe: I think so too. And that little flap? Great for holding my lipstick.
Joey: Yeah, I wouldnt know about that.
Phoebe: There is nothing wrong with Jake! Okay? He is all man! Im thinking even more than you.
Phoebe: Im just saying that only a man completely secure with his masculinity could walk around in womens underwear! I dont think you could ever do that.
Joey: Hey! I am secure with my masculinity.
Rachel: God. I forgot how much I love driving. I have got to get my license renewed.
Rachel: I am not horsing around okay? I am Porsching around.
Ross: I was talking to myself! Youre going down!
Monica: Uh oh yeah, she did. Uh, he did. (To Chandler) She? (To the waiter) Im-Im sorry Im new. I dont
Chandler: Yeah, I just ordered a beer! (Pounds the table.)
Waiter in Drag: Youre straight. I get it. (Walks away.)
Monica: I still say that if we had called your dad we coulda gotten better seats.
Chandler: No! No! I dont want him to know were yet! Im not sure Im ready for that. And besides hes not gonna be too happy to see me either.
Chandler: I dont know if Ive told you this, but hes kinda tried to get in contact with me a lot over the last few years
Chandler: Yeah, hes made phone calls, written letters, he even came to New York, but I always said I was too busy to see him. Yknow its all very Cats in the CradleI dont want to get into it. (The show starts.) Here we go.
Rachel: Okay. Switch places with me! Switch places with me! Come on! Ill go under, you go over!
Ross: Yeah, Ill get right on that.
Ross: No Rach! Come on! No-no! Yeah, Im sure we wont get arrested for this.
Rachel: (sexily) Hi officer, was I going a little too fast?
Policeman: Can I see your license please?
Rachel: Oh yes, absolutely! Yknow, its weird uh, but I had a dream last night where I was stopped by a policeman. And then he uh well I probably shouldnt tell you the rest.
Rachel: Really?! You think so? Yknow, I had just rolled out of bed.
Policeman: Yes I am.
Rachel: I bet youre a Gemini.
Rachel: I knew it! I knew it, ahh .
Policeman: Well I tell you what
Rachel: I wont speed.
Rachel: I promise.
Ross: I can handle the stick!!
Helena: I feel pretty. Oh so pretty. I feel pretty and witty and (She holds the mike out to the audience.)
Chandler: Believe me, Ive been saying that for years. Oh my God!
Helena: (singing) For Im loved by a pretty wonderful boy! (Applause.) Hello! And welcome to the show. I see some of our regulars in the audience. And a couple of irregulars. (He starts going into the audience.)
Helena: Im sorry? (Holds out the mike.)
Helena: No-no I heard! Im just sorry.
Chandler: It cant happen like this. Okay? Ill meet you back at the hotel.
Joey: Check it out. (He turns around, pulls down his pants, and shows Phoebe that hes got panties on.) How much of a man am I?!
Joey: Yknow, Im beginning to see what Jake was talking about.
Joey: Yeah! And-and things arent as smashed down as I thought they were gonna be.
Joey: Bikini, French cut, thong! And-and the fabrics! Youve got cotton, silk, lace! And yknow what Ive always wondered about?
Joey: Pantyhose! Yknow? They way they start at your toe and go all the way up to here (He mimed that and stops when he realized he went to far.) I should go take these off shouldnt I?
Phoebe: I think its important that you do.
Monica: Im-Im Monica.
Helena: Im not very fond of New York. Queens I like. (Noticing Monicas ring.) Ooh, what is this sparkle something! (Shows the audience who woos.) Honey! Huh?
Chandler: Actually Monica and I are engaged.
Helena: (disappointed) I see. Well, I wish you both a lifetime of happiness. (To a bald guy.) So youre bald?
Chandler: I know it would make me happy, maam.
Helena: Well I wouldnt miss it for the world. Oh! Im getting all misty here! Youd think I was having my legs waxed or something. (Goes back on stage.)
Helena: Before we go on with the show, I just want to say to the bride and groom how lucky they are to have found each other. In every life, a little rain must fall. Fortunately, in my life (Four guys wearing rubber boots, shorts, hats, and nothing else carrying umbrellas run onto the stage.) (Singing) Its raining men!
Chandler: (To Monica) When I was growing up I played the one on the far left.
Ross: What?! What does he want?! I wasnt doing anything!
Ross: Ah no. I dont, but it could not have been more than sixty.
Ross: I mean youre not gonna give me a-a ticket for driving too slow are ya?
Ross: Yknow of-officer I uh I had the weirdest dream last night
Policeman: Its Petty. (He grabs Rosss license.) Ill be right back with your ticket. (Walks back to his car.)
Ross: I know. I know.
Joey: Yeah! Much! Listen uh, not that Im yknow insecure about my manhood or anything yknow, but I think I need to hook up with a woman like right now.
Phoebe: Yeah, I understand.
Joey: Yknow, you look familiar. Do I know you from somewhere?
Woman: I dont think so.
Joey: Oh! Maybe its because Im on television. Im an actor on Days of Our Lives.
Rachel: Im just saying that yknow, someday Ross is gonna meet somebody and hes gonna have his own life. Right?
Monica: All right baby, come on! (Rolls the dice) Yes! Yes! I am on fire!
Joey: (looks perplexed and opens up his robe) Ok... I mean...
Monica: (Yells after him) I love you!
Ross: Oh, no, it's no big deal, I mean, if I weren't doing this I'd just, you know, be at the gym working out.
Monica: Well, nows a good time. Im on my way to have my ears cut off.
Monica: Oh man! If I had known I was coming to this party I never would have gotten married!
Chandler: I'm sorry buddy, but I don't think I'm gonna be able to make it.
Sonia: We'll get to the wax in a minute. First I want to tweeze some of the strays, ok? This may sting just a little bit...
Joey: Yeah, I want my tickets too (takes the bowl from Rachel)! And I'm buying the Knicks! And Steffi Graff, ah ah!
Rachel: I always loved that!!
Rachel: Come on! I think this is funny! (Ross leaves)
Maitre D�: I sincerely hope the rest of your party is returning.
Chandler: I... I don't know... you seem lovely.
Joey: (browsing the tissues) Let me see if I approve any of these clowns. This guy wears a rug (discards one). This guy's Canadian (discards another). And this guy is in a cult, ok, and it costs you 5,000$ to get to level three and I don't feel any different.
Chandler: Well, second prettiest that year; I mean, of *all* the girls in Oklahoma, she's probably...
Ross: Oh, well no, but I mean, she only goes out with really, really smart guys.
Rachel: (drunken voice) I think I am.
RACHEL: Oh God, Ross.� Ross is going to pick up the phone.� Oh, I have to get my number back.� (She turns to find Bill, but they have gone.)� Oh my God.� He's gone.
Phoebe: I am one of Bens mothers. Im a lesbian. It was, it was difficult coming out to my parents.
Monica: Don't worry Joe, I won't come next year!
Rachel: Oh! Screw it, I didn't get it! (they high-five)
Monica: So I got it when I was 13...
Molly: I think it's sweet. (goes to leave)
Rachel: I just wanted to let you know I've changed my mind: I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna kiss Joey.
Tag: No! It was marked confidential I just sent it down to Human Resources.
Monica: No! But because he thought I was to faaaaa . (Chandler emerges, without flushing by the way.) And every time I think about it, it makes me feel as bad as I did in fifth grade! Yknow, I-I really think that you should apologize to Julie.
Rachel: I could, I could but I don't want to! I want to kiss Joey!
Phoebe: Wow, a year and a half ago I didnt even know I had a brother, and now I have a sister too. (They all hug, and Frank and Alice start kissing.) Okay. Okay. Stop it, dont. So, I gotta get you a gift now. Is there anything you need?
Monica: That's different! I was drunk and stupid!
Monica: And I can't stop you.
Ross: Hey, I thought I'd end up kissing Charlie too ok? But SURPRISE!
Monica: It's so weird, how did Joey end up kissing Charlie last night? I thought you'd end up kissing Charlie.
Ross: Yes, she is this new professor of my department that I did not kiss.
Rachel: And umm, vintage handkerchiefs yknow cause, people cry at weddings. (Starting to cry.) Im just gonna grab a couple of these.
Phoebe: I may play the fool at times, but Im a little more than a pretty blond girl with an ass that wont quit. (She takes the sweater out of her purse.) I believe this belongs to the father of your baby.
Rachel: All right, so... Ross, you're ok with all this? I mean...
Rachel: I wanna sleep, I wanna eat, I wanna take a shower, I mean before she wakes up and we gotta do this all over again.
Ross: Yeah, it's no big deal. I mean, I just met her and I'm fine with it...
Phoebe: But, I mean, do you think hes gonna enjoy it when hes up to his elbows in the diapers from all the babies they have to have right away?! This is not fair to Frank, (she walks behind them again, and hey again turn to follow her) and it-its not fair to the babies, and y'know what, its not good home economics.
Phoebe: I ordered Chinese food.
Ross: Yeah, I know the type.
Mrs. Bing: Chandler darling! Look, my date has finally arrived. Id like you to meet Dennis Phillips.
Ross: Uhm no! Think less of you! No, I don't think less of you. I mean, you saw someone you liked and you kissed them. I mean, those people who like someone and don't kiss them... those-those people are stupid, I hate those people.
Rachel: No, its Ross. Its Ross. You like Ross. (He just shakes his head.) Oh daddy, I hope youre okay with all of this. I mean think about it, this is a good thing. Youre gonnaThis is your first grandchild! Youre gonna be a poppy!
Joey: Ross, you should know that my pants are startin to come down and Im not wearing any underwear!
Ross: Oh, God. I forgot how hot she was!
Joey: Nothing! Well, I-I got this blinding pain in my stomach when I was lifting weights before, then I uh passed out and uh, havent been able to stand up since. But um, I dont think its anything serious.
Rachel: Oh, OH! Wow, I love those! Where did you get them?
Ross: You? You! Want to watch Ben? (in the background Monica mouths Dont worry, Ill be here the whole time. to Ross.) Yes! Thatd be great, no, I just wanted to ask Monica, because I know how empty her life is. (Monica sarcastically mouths Yeah! and holds up her thumb.)
Gunther: I dropped a cup.
Rachel: Well, I would like to have the option!!
Rachel: I promise.
Monica: (entering) Hey honey! I missed you today!
Rachel: But I am going hunting!!
Rachel: Oh, not as a friend, Phoebe!! Fine, I won't use it!
Joey: Oh thats right. Theres a lot going on here and I think I ate some bad fruit earlier.
Chandler: But I don't wanna do it in a cup!
Monica: Olivia? I thought she was marrying Connor! (pause) Oh right, real life more important.
Joey: Can I offer you a drink?
Phoebe: I had to bring them! We killed their mother, they're our responsibility now. You know, they require constant care. You should know that, Rachel, you're a mother.
Chandler: I also got this great salt and pepper shaker from the restaurant.
Joey: I know, yeah!
Charlie: And first, I have to see the MET!
Joey: (looking puzzled) I don't think so.
Receptionist: Well, I think this is a great place to work!
Conan: For example, I dont have to memorize lines. You guys actually have to remember what to say and you probably forget from time to time. Yes?
Joey: I need to talk to you about Charlie.
Joey/Drake: Yes, you do.Yes...you do. I'm the one who doesn't have a choice because I...because I can't stop loving you.
Ross: You know, I really don't want to get involved in you guy's relationship.
Joey: Please, c'mon, you're the smartest person I know and I really like this girl, ok, I don't wanna lose her.
Chandler: (emotional) It's a baby! A beautiful little baby! And some other stuff I'm gonna pretend I don't see.
Monica: I swear I didnt know she was a hooker! I mean whDid you let her smoke in here?
Monica: Because, honey, I mean this in the sweetest way possible, nobody is gonna wanna watch that.
Phoebe: Umm Wow, all right. (Checks the book.) Wow! Yay! Ooh, Im gonna meet a guy! And really soon! And hes gonna be the man of my dreams. Probably not the guy I had a dream about last night. (Points at Chandler.)
Chandler: Yeah, I guess!
Chandler: (disgusted) I think it just fell off. (Leaves)
Phoebe: Hell, Im drunk right now! (They all turn and look at her.) What? I cant have a mimosa with breakfast?! Im on vacation!
Chandler: I'd love to stay, but I have eh... (points at the cup) got a hot date... (starts to leave)
Rachel: You know I... (lifts her head and tries to look in Phoebe's direction)
Rachel: Damn! I wish I knew if that was right!
Ross: Ok, but you know what? I gotta say, I'm really impressed that you were able to memorize all this so quickly!
Phoebe: (interrupting) Uh-huh, me too. Ross, maybe I should've specified that I'd be needing a grown up doctor.
Ross: Oh thank God, I thought she had two heads.
Janice: Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so this is like a vacation for him. So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
Chandler: Well maybe you're going about this the wrong way. You know I mean think about it. Single white male, divorced three times,two illegitimate children. The personal ad writes itself....
Phoebe: I would, but I get my morning sickness in the evening.
Monica: Thats it. Im done. I dont care when the baby comes, no more betting.
Phoebe: I don't have to tell you everything!
Rachel: Yeah, I cant live with Joey once the baby comes. I dont want my childs first words to be, (in a babys voice) "How you doin?"
Phoebe: You know what? You are right. I am gonna quit. It's time I took my life back!
Ross: Well I had a great time! Umm, Chancy on the other hand
Rachel: We have to have a surprise Bon Voyage party for Emily. But its actually for Joshua. (Starts handing out party hats.) Look, he said hes not ready to date, so I had to invite him to a party if I wanted to see him outside of work, and now I have the perfect opportunity to seduce him! (Hands Ross a party hat.)
Charlie: Yeah, I guess that's true.
Ross: What, I mean, a little, but no, what, go on.
Janice: Well, Sid and I are trying again and we had trouble last time because apparently we...
Rachel: I know, but I was just thinking about how huge this is for me. I didnt even go to how huge this was going to be for the father.
Charlie: Well... I'm just thinking that maybe he's not the right guy to be with right now, maybe I should be with someone... I have more in common with. You know what I mean?
Rachel: (moves away again) I-I-I-Im just Im just a good kisser!
Ross: Glad I could help man.