words in movies
Chandler: What did I marry into?
Monica: Oh, I can't. We're throwing Phoebe a bachelorette party.
Ross: Oh, and Chandler and I have this stupid college alumni thing. I can't believe you get to meet Donny Osmond.
Monica: Ross and I always wanted to be Donny and Marie.
Rachel: Oh God, that's right. I blocked that out.
Chandler: (looking around) Did I go to this school?
Ross: Hey, I hear she's single again, d'you think I should ask her out?
Ross: Hey. Hey, check out the flyers for the band. I made 'em on a Macintosh in the computer room!
Chandler: I know it. You know, I'm totally gonna ask her out.
Ross: Dude, I was gonna ask her out.
Chandler: I said it first, bro.
Ross: Well, I thought it first, Holmes.
Ross: Woha! Wait... What are we doing? What we have is too important to mess it up over some girl. I mean, we can get laid anytime we want.
Chandler: Totally. I had sex in High school...
Chandler: Well, I officially give you permission to break the pact.
Ross: Thank you. (they shake hands) All right, here I go. Hey, remember how scary it used to be going up to girls in college?
Ross: I know, and I can't stop sweating. (he walks towards Missy)
Joey: (to Gene) I know it could be intimidating for regular people to be around celebrities but... relax, I'm just like you! (pause) Only better looking and richer.
Joey: (on the screen there's the word "Supermarket") Uhm... ok. It's a store, like a supermarket. (there is a sound indicating he made a mistake as he shouldn't have said 'supermarket'. The next word appears, "notebook") Oh! I see-I see what I did. Yeah, ok, ok, uhm... I'm writing in my...
Joey: Noo, (whispering) more like a notebook... Damn it! (next word appears: "blueprint") Oh, if I'm building an house, the plan isn't called the 'shmoo-print'... Can't say that either? Woha... hey... (the last word is "Football field" and there are 5 seconds left) In high school, I once had sex with a girl right in the middle of the...
Rachel: Pheebs, I... there isn't gonna be any flying about! We actually thought we were a little too mature for stuff like that.
Phoebe: Oh, ok. I see what you're doing, that's fine. This is all there is, just tea, uh, ok. (she drinks her tea) Hmmmm... raunchy!
Phoebe: Really? So this is... this is my big send off in the married life? Rachel this is the only bachelorette party I'm ever gonna have! I've got a big wad of ones in my purse! Really? I mean, really? It's just tea?
Rachel: Nooo! Phoebe, of course there is more! I mean, I'll just go and talk to Monica and get an ETA on the pee-pee's!
Donny: Now Gene I must remind you, you need all six of these to stay in the game, all right? Describe for Joey things you find in your refrigerator.
Gene: Hey! I got a kid starting college. I've to get surgery on my knee, you just lost me ten grand!
Joey: Oh, wow! I'm so sorry, ok? I promise, we'll do better next time!
Gene: Well, I will, because I won't be playing with you.
Ross: That's ok. Uh, anyway, well he and I both really liked you a lot, uhm, but we didn't want anything to jeopardize our friendship, so we kinda made a pact, that neither of us could ask you out!
Missy: Well, Chandler and I used to make out! A lot!
Roy: Ooh, boy. You should warn people there's no elevator! I should not have had that Mexican food for lunch.
Phoebe: Oh God no, I don't wanna see him take his clothes off!
Monica: Oh, no! I mean, obviously we want to see you take your clothes off! You big piece of eye candy!
Roy: Ok, ok, ladies! Can I have your attention, please? (pause) Did someone call for the long arm of the law? (He extends his arm from around his crotch and then upward and outward, towards Phoebe) I should warn you, I have a concealed weapon! (Puts his hands over his crotch) I hope you're familiar with the States penal code, ok, ok, enough teasing. Now for some pleasing!
Phoebe: This is how I look when I'm turned on!
Roy: You were talking about me before! Look, I don't need this! I'm outta here! Where's my hat? (goes to get it) Look, I've been in this business for a long time!
Roy: Didn't do anything? I took a bus all the way from Hoboken. I climbed ... I dunno... like a billion stairs... It's not like I can take them two at a time!
Phoebe: I don't care. We're not paying you 300 dollars for this.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, okay. I'm uptight. Yeah, that's why I don't want to watch a middle aged guy dance around in what I can only assume is a child halloween costume! (turns to look at Monica and Rachel who look like they feel very sorry for the stripper)
Roy: I may have borrowed this from my nephew, but let me assure you, what's underneath (points at his groin)... is all man.
Joey: (To Henrietta) My friend Rachel has a kid. I totally know nursery rhymes! (makes a thumbs up sign)
Chandler: I believe the foundation of our friendship was unfortunate hair. (Ross just stares at him) All right, look, if we're really gonna do this... it's not like you never broke one of the pacts.
Ross: I didn't.
Ross: I never did anything with Adrienne Turner.
Chandler: Oh please, and you knew how much I liked her.
Ross: I don't know what... you're talking about.
Present Chandler's voice: Remember that big party? Freshman year? A week before Christmas vacation? I do. You had some visitors.
Monica: I can't believe we are at a real college party! (Rachel laughs excitedly) I have to pee so bad!
Rachel: I know. But if some guy who looks like Corey Haim wants to kiss me tonight, I'm sooo gonna let them! (They spot Chandler)
Monica: I KNOW!
Chandler: O-kay. I'll see if I can find Ross. (Goes off to find Ross.)
Adrienne: Oh believe me, Ross, I won't be telling anybody about this.
Ross: I didn't know you knew about that.
Chandler: Well, I did and it hurt. (they walk towards the bar) That's when I wrote the song: "Betrayal In The Common Room".
Ross: (looks disappointed in himself) Man... I... I'm sorry.
Ross: So, eh. I made out with Adrienne and you made out with Missy. Well I guess we're even.
Chandler: (sighs) Just one more thing. I was so pissed at you that night that I wanted to get back at you. So I thought, who does Ross like the more than anybody?
Rachel: I am sooo drunk.
Monica: That's weird. I've had the same number of beers as you and I don't feel anything at all. (Chandler approaches)
Rachel: (finishing the last of her drink) I am soo not going to do good on my SATs tomorrow.
Rachel: (sarcastic) Oh yeah. There is a plan! Why don't I just start taking my smart pills now?
Rachel: Oh well, You know, I think it's kinda really important that I go somewhere where there's sun, so I'm sort of... (Chandler leans in an kisses her) (She pulls away) Hey!
Roy: No, no, you're right. Who am I kidding? I should have hung up that breakaway jockstrap years ago. What am I gonna do? I mean, this has been my life for thirty two years. Taking my clothes off in front of people is all I know.
Rachel: No, wait. No there's gotta be something else that you can do. I mean, what skills do you have?
Roy: I don't know... I can make my pecs dance... I can pick up a dollar bill with my butt cheeks... I can go to that special place inside me where I feel no shame.
Roy: You know, actually that's not a bad idea. I can do it out of my apartment. I don't think my mom would mind.
Roy: Yeah, yeah, yeah... This is so weird. I mean, you never know when it's gonna be your last dance. And I didn't even get a chance to finish it.
Joey: (sympathetic) Oh, I'm so sorry. I don't know any Spanish words.
Joey: Dude, dude! I think you're losing it.
Gene: Uhm, "I have fur", "I like to bark".
Ross: Because... the night you kissed Rachel was the night I kissed Rachel for the very first time.
Monica: Two guys in one night? Wow, I thought she became a slut after she got her nose fixed.
Ross: Okay, after you told me she was passed out in our room, I went in there to make sure she was all right. She was lying on my bed, all buried in peoples coats. Well, I went to kiss her on the forehead, you know. But it was so dark, I accidentally got her lips. I started to pull away, but then I felt her start to kiss me back. It was only for a second, but... it was amazing. And now, now I find out that you kissed her first.
Chandler: I'm pretty sure I put her on my bed.
Chandler: Why would I kiss a girl, and then put her on your bed?
Monica: I was the pile of coats!
Chandler: What did I marry into?
Monica: I love you. (They kiss.)
Rachel: Well of course I do! But yknow, favorite returning character is a tough category Joey. I mean youre up against the guy who survived his own cremation.
Chandler: I love you so much.
Chandler: Yes! And thats why Im under the table. Celebrating.
Monica: No, I want everything that you just said. I want a marriage.
ALISON: Oh, my major was totally useless. I mean, how often do you look in the classifieds and see "Philosopher wanted"?
Rachel: (flinches) Ross! Come on! That's all right! Fine--Okay, I have a weird thing about my eye. Can we not talk about it please?
Chandler: I wanted to be with you. I missed you so much.
Chandler: I never want to leave you again!
Monica: No, I think that this is what you wanna do, I think it's great!
Chandler: (realizing) I have *not* thought this through!
Chandler: Turns out they can't fire me. Because I quit.
Chandler: I know, I, I should have talked to you first about it.
Bob: Toby! Im not gonna let you cover for him. Anything you say right now will just get me more upset with Chandler!
Rachel: Wha... are you kidding? I can't return this.
Monica: Chandler, please dont think I was trying to pressure you. Phoebe and Rachel
Chandler: I don't have a *job*!
Rachel: Oh, yknow I'm not that much of a sweet tooth. I(Chandler puts a forkful of the cheesecake in her mouth.)Wow. My God, so creamy. Oh my God, this is the best cheesecake I have ever had. Where did you get this? (She reaches over to look at the label on the box.)
Ms. McKenna: Boston is down, Atlanta is down, Houston is down, I could go on and on but instead of boring you Ill go straight to my forty two point plan.
Ross: Oh, I can't tell you how great it was to look at the crowd and see your face! I mean... uh, did you know you were (giggles) mouthing the words along with me?
Rachel: Am I the only one who doesn't think that she's hot? Ross?
Ross: Dr. Gettleman? Yeah I know, I don't think that's a good idea. In fact, I think he's dead.
Ross: All right Emily, as much as I love you, I'm sorry, I can't move to London without Ben.
ROSS: Bye Marcel. See ya on the big screen. You keep people drinkin' that beer, OK. I miss you buddy.
Monica: No, no, no, I don't make chocolate pies. When I was younger I-I enter in this pie-eating contest. I ate so many that just the thought of them made me sick.
Monica: Oh my God! You cleaned! (Gasps) Look at these floors! You did the windows! Oh, I have been begging you for months and you did! You cleaned! And nagging works!
Rachel: I was giving you an appology and you were totally checking her out!
Gavin: I thought it was ok when you slept with your old assistant Tag.
Part I Written by: Michael Borkow Part II Teleplay by: Shana Goldberg-Meehan & Scott Silveri Part II Story by: Jill Condon & Amy Toomin Part I Transcribed by: Eric Aasen Part II Transcribed by: Aaron D. Miller
Gavin: Why do you even care if I was looking at her? Are you jealous?
Joey: Man, I wish I had a nanny like you.
CHANDLER: So, when I woke up this morning, he'd stolen all the insoles out of my shoes.
Rachel: (to Joey) Hey, listen, Joey, about Molly, I really prefer if you didn't go after her.
Joey: Oh, man, why did have to go and say that for? Now that you told me I can't have it makes me want her even more!
Joey: Well, I didnt realize until I got home. I wasnt gonna walk all the way back down here with one shoe! Yknow what? Im gonna go find that guys car and leave a note on the windshield. (Goes to do so.)
MONICA: Oh I was just doing Chandler's side of the conversation.� You know, like, "Hi, How do I look?"� (As Chandler) "Really sexy.� Could I BE any more turned on?"
Phoebe: I don't know, I kinda like Bob for a girl.
Mike: I don't know but they don't sound like spa treatments. You have to get rid of it!
Mike: OK, I don't want to freak you out or anything, but I think I just saw a rat in your cupboard.
Chandler: Oh. You mind if I join you?
Ross: I am, yes.
Joey: Actually, that will be long. You know, I really need to organize my thoughts.
Joey: Allright, fine, I only have one thought! It's about the hot nanny, I gotta see her!
Chandler: I'm afraid I can't let you do that, Joe.
Chandler: Yes, as a matter of fact he did, so I can't let you go.
Rachel: Um, excuse me Gavin, I have a question I need to ask you.
Rachel: I was faking it! Can't you tell when I'm being fake?
Phoebe: Me too. Although this city is my home, so. So thats dumb what I said, dont tell him I said that. Umm, you make something up. (Mischa does so and Sergei kisses her hand.) Nice, (to Mischa) thank you. This is me. Here.
Joey: Hey Rach, so can I sing happy birthday to you now?
Ross: Where the hell are Joey and Molly? I asked you to watch them.
Joey: Oh, I didn't go to college.
Chandler: She doesnt know. Says she loves us both. Y'know I woke up this morning and I was in love, well I was happy. Y'know it serves me right for buying that twelve pack of condoms. And now I cant even return them, because she choked on the reciept!
Joey: I wanna be mr. Wigglemunch. (and makes a "there" nod to Ross)
Ross: Ok ... (they leave the room, long pause) Well, uh, Joey, I guess we have no problem.
Rachel: Oh, great! Well, then I'm gonna take Emma to see him. I wonder why Ross said that he died.
Ross: Okay umm, why dont we all take a seat, yknow? And uh, and Ill get us all some uh some coffees(He goes to pull out Elizabeths chair, but Paul steps in)Yeah, why dont you. (Paul pulls out her chair) Uh and you guys can talk about whatever, whatever you want. Yknow? Whatever pops into your head. (He turns his back to Paul and Elizabeth and points to himself for Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe. Then he goes to order the coffee.)
Mike: No, I think you're sweet.
Nurse: Yes, I see that here. Unfortunately we cant guarantee a private room and currently theyre all unavailable.
Larry: Well, I suppose I could give him a warning.
Rachel: Hi. Thanks for the party, honey. Should I help you clean up?
Rachel: Okay fine, I did. But I didnt see anything, I swear.
Monica: No way! You had your party, now I have mine! Is everything alright?
Chandler: Im not great at the advice, can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? Some cheese?
ROSS: Can I ask you somethin'?
Gavin: I really mean it.
Chandler: Okay, its just weird! Okay? I dont want to be standing their saying my vows and then having the mental image of you and Monica! I-I-I need I dont know what I need. I need a walk.
Rachel: No thats just(Laughs)Thats just cause Im such a good messer!
Joey: Boy I tell ya, this little talent came in handy before I could afford porn.
Phoebe: Listen, I think I've left something here.
Gavin: I do have feelings for you.
Ross: OK! Last night after the party I saw Rachel kissing that jerk from her office out on your balcony.
David: Hey! Oh, I was just about to leave. I-I-I-I didnt think you were coming.
Phoebe: (likes the jacket) No, but I like it. I think I left one of my rat babies.
Chandler: Oh, uh, well, I haven't seem it but if I do I'll let you know.
Rachel: All right, all right, you're right, I won't do anything with Joey, I just thought that we (Joey enters the hall) Ok so that would be two cups of tarragon, one pound of baking soda and one red onion? (Joey enters his apartment)
Monica: Wait a minute! Now Im betting against all three of you?
Ross: Why...Why should I? I mean if she wants to move on, that's fine!
Joey: Listen, I ah, I know its a longshot. But, by any chance did she find that funny?
Gavin: Yes, I feel that you are a little annoying.
Chandler: Why did I get married?!
Ross: (not getting it) Yeah! Yeah! Rachel picked it out for me. She told me to trust her and you know what? I'm glad I did! I turned quite a few heads on my way over here.
Joey: Oh man! I have to get those done too?!
Policeman: Its Petty. (He grabs Rosss license.) Ill be right back with your ticket. (Walks back to his car.)
Chandler: All right, I suppose I can wait a day. Hey, what are you doing Friday?
Rachel: Wow! I cant believe thats our baby.
Monica: Only if I don't have to get up and sing.
Rachel: No not that. I kissed Gavin last night.
Monica: No no, it's not working on me. Wow! I must be growing up!
MONICA: No no, the father can, but um, since I am the roommate I can tell you that she's not here and I'll pass along the message, ok. So bye-bye.
Phoebe: Oh before I forget, are you coming to Mike's piano bar tonight?
Chandler: You called everyone and said you were having trouble finding a Santa costume, so I borrowed one from a guy at work!
Rachel: Hi guys! Listen I really need your help. I think I did something really stupid.
Monica: I thought you hated him?
Mr. Geller: Of course. Ill always be your dad.
Rachel: Or...I could call in sick and not deal with it at all...
Joey: OK Thanks.(Joey touches the hot wax). I touched the stuff
Monica: (entering, in a hurry) Guys! Guys! I just saw two people having sex in a car right outside.
Chandler: What are doing? You know I can only dish it out!
Ross: I can't believe Rachel just moved on and didn't say anything to me
Ross: Not well. I went on the subway again and someone did sit on my hand but that person was neither female nor wearing pants.