words in movies
Phoebe: (To Joey) Oh hey! How was your audition?
The Casting Director: Terrific! Well uh, theres one more thing. Uhh, uh its really important to the director that everything in this movie is authentic. Yeah and so in your love scene with Sarah she talks about how shes never seen a naked man who wasnt Jewish. So (Laughs.)
Joey: I dont know! I really want this part! And they tell you no matter what you get asked at an audition you say yes. Like if-if they want you to ride a horse, you tell em you can! And just figure out how to do it later.
Ross: Cassie, how you-how you doin on that hot dog.
Phoebe: How are you? (The woman nods) Good. (She goes over to another couple of women.) Hi, thanks for coming.
Rachel: (to her) Hi! Im Rachel. This is Phoebe. Im the maid of honor. How do you know Monica?
Rachel: Well, remember how we were too drunk to remember anything the night we were married?
Monica: Mom, uh, Chandler was just saying how beautiful your sweater is.
Rachel: Oh really?! Then how come all your stuff is in this box?! (Monica starts chasing Rachel around the table.)
Ross: How was I supposed to know wed end up being friends after college, let alone you-you would be living with my sister?
Chandler: How could it not matter?!
Ross: I wonder how I would react under fire, y'know? And not backfire but-but heavy fire, like I was in a war or something.
Rachel: Really? How good?
Ross: Oh, well you see how it works is, the part with Dick Clark in Times Square is actually live, but they tape some of the party stuff ahead of time. Yeah, not a lot of people know that.
Emily: Its not the pants. Its you that is backwards. And if, and if you dont understand how important this is to me, well then, perhaps we shouldnt get married at all! (She storms out.)
Girl: We learned how to dance.
Monica: Oh yeah? Well when you learned how to dance did you forget how to put on underpants?
Rachel: Wow, Monica, I love that, you really have faith in me. Thank you. Technical question, how do you know when uh, the butters done?
Ross: Wait a minute! I saw that! On The Discovery Channel, yeah! About jellyfish and how if you... (stops suddenly and turns to look at Monica) Ewwww!! You peed on yourself?!
Janine: How are we gonna get out of that one?
Phoebe: How much was it?
Rachel: Oh, okay see I thought, I thought you meant how much was it when it was new, yknow like back then.
Chandler: I dont know, but dont worry, dont worry, because I know how to take a picture now. (They get ready) Okay, see? Look down (Looks down), look down, look down (He falls asleep.)
Phoebe: (coming in from the bathroom) Oh, good, good, you guys are here! Listen, how would like to spend tomorrow taking care of three incredibly cute little puppies?!
Chandler: All right, let's show them how it's done.
Joey: Home sweet home, huh? Nice to, uh, get back to reality. Plus we know how the New Years gonna go off. I guess theres no reason for all that Y2K panic, yknow? Anyway, gnight!
Monica: No, no its going to be great. Really! Mom, Dad, when I got married, one of the things that made me sure I could do it was the amazing example the two of you set for me. For that and so many other things I want to say thank you. I know I probably dont say it enough, but I love you. (Pretends to cry hoping her parents will join her.) When I look around this room, Im-Im saddened by the thought of those who could not be here with us. Nana, my beloved grandmother who would so want to be here, but she cant because shes dead. As is our dog Chi-Chi. I mean look how cute she is. (Holds up the picture and pretends to cry again). Was. (To an old man by the stage.) Do me a favor and pass this to my parents. Remember shes dead. Okay, her and Nana, gone. Wow! Hey does anybody remember when Debra Winger had to say goodbye to her children in Terms of Endearment? (Chandler covers his ears) Didnt see that? No movie fans?! You want to hear something sad? The other day I was watching 60 Minutes these orphans in Romania, who have been so neglected, they were incapable of love. (Waits for people to cry, but doesnt get any tears.) You people are made of stone! Heres to mom and dad! Whatever!
Joey: This is Vegas man! People will pay to see freaky stuff! Okay, how much would you pay to see this hand (Holds up his left hand) twice? Huh?
Ross: Well each tell you how we came up with the joke and then you decide which one of us is telling the truthme.
Jill: Oh, thats so great! Okay, Im really gonna do this! I dont know how to thank you guys.
Chandler: Let her know I like her? What are you, insane? (The girls make disgusted noises.) It's the next day! How needy do I want to seem? (To the guys) I'm right, right?
Phoebe: What about, what about when I said yknow about the apartment pants, how dumb was I?
Phoebe: (singing) I found you in my bed! Howd you whined up there? You are a mystery! Little black curly hair! Little black curly hair! Little black, little black, little black, little black, little black curly hair
Jill: Oh no! But I just walked past three sales and I didnt go in. How strong am I?
Monica: How could I be asleep knowing that you were in the next room.
Monica: God, Ross is on a date with your sister! How weird is that?!
Ross: Unreasonable? How about we have this conversation when one of you guys gets married! You have no idea what it takes to make a marriage work! All right, it's about compromise! Do you always like it? No! Do you do it? Yes! Because it's not all laughing, happy, candy in the sky, drinking coffee at Central Perk all the time! It's real life, okay? It's what grown-ups do! (He storms out.)
ESTL: Well, there's my favorite client. So tell me darling, how was the audition?
Rachel: Oh Ross, hi! Hey, how are ya? There you are!
Phoebe: Hmm, how about my azzz?
Phoebe: No-no-no, but I am mad! I am mad! Because this stuff is everything that is wrong with the world! And its all sitting up in my living room and all I can think about is how I dont have that lamp!
Ross: It's an honor to meet you. I can't tell you how long I've been an admirer of your work, I mean, that Nobel prize, (he thumbs up) whoooo! I mean, I have to tell you that, you're one of the reasons I got into the field.
(They start trying to trade babies while holding one each. They have no idea how to do it, so they just shift the babies around in their arms. They give up pretty quickly.)
Phoebe: Oh no! No! I know how to handle it.
Chandler: How can I not be upset? Okay? I finally fall in love with this fantastic woman and it turns out that she wanted you first!
Joey: You forget how many great songs Heart had.
Rachel: That would be great! Wait, how long is Denise gone for?
Rachel: Wow! How are you?!
Monica: Oh my God, sit down! Sit down! How long as it been since weve seen each other?
Phoebe: Hey, how are you guys doing?
Joey: (To Rachel) So uh, how you doin?
Phoebe: How long has it been since you had sex?
Monica: Sorry. So hows it going with Joey?
Rachel: Oh, its the best! (They both exhale contemplating the joys of marriage.) So, umm hows Monica?
Mike: This is the first time hes ever used this product, he's never used this product before, you're gonna see how easy this is to do. (To Kevin) Go ahead. ('Kevin' starts using the product, it is a spout that you jab into a paper milk carton so that you don't have to rip it open.) This works with any milk carton.
Ross: Hey, hows it going?
Ross: How hot is this?!
Monica: How many?
Joey: When was the last time someone told you just how beautiful you are?
Chandler: All right, think about it. Now remember when you were going out with that girl Donna and you guys broke up. Remember how horrible it was when you guys bumped into each other at the supermarket?
Joey: (not quite sure of how to answer that) Well uh, look Ross I uh, I think Carols great and Im sure youre a very attractive man, but I .
Woman: Hey Pheebs! Hows it going?!
Ross: Look, I-I drew a sketch about how we're gonna do it. (Showing them) Okay Rach, (points to the sketch) that's you. That's the couch. (Points again.)
Rachel: Hey Pheebs, youre still alive! How are you doing?
Rachel: Careful. Light. Okay, do you know how, just sweep it across the lid. Okay? Just sweep it.
Ross: How about we settle this right now! (He rips up the tickets.) There! Now, no one's going to the game. Ha-ha-ha!
Chandler: Hows your room Rach?
Rachel: How does going to a strip club help him better?
Joey's Look-A-Like: Im Joey! How are you doin?!
Phoebe: Oh my God! How bad was it?
Joey: Oh, how bad is it?
Elizabeth: I wanted to say how much I enjoyed your class.
Monica: Hey! Hows it goin?
Ross: Hey Joey, how come our stuff isnt free?
Chandler: God, its great to catch up! I cant believe how long its been!
PHOEBE: Today we're gonna start with some songs about barnyard animals. [singing] Oh, the cow in the meadow goes moo, Oh, the cow in the meadow goes moo. Then the farmer hits him on the head and grinds him up, And that's how we get hamburgers. Nooowww, chickens!
Ross: No, wait ! You guys, no, no, you can't leave! Rachel already feels bad that the cake's messed up. How do you think she's gonna feel when she comes back here and all you guys are gone?
Chandler: Its Thursday! How was the audition?!
Joey: (grunting) Oh my How much do you weigh Ross?!
Joey: Hey, (in the Joey voice) how you doin?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is entering numbers on a calculator as Ross reads off how much hes sold.]
Ross: Well I-I-I dont care how hot it is its-its uh, its wrong.
Joey: Not anymore. So anyway, how do you want to pay me?
Ross: What?! What? How do you, how do you even know its broken?!
Monica: Hey! How did it go with Elizabeth?
Rachel: Ugh, how can you even ask that question?!
Eldad: How are you?
Joey: Actually, tomorrow night kinda depends on how tonight goes.
Rachel: Uh, thank you Phoebe. Umm, well, what struck me most when reading Jane Eyre was uh, how the book was so ahead of its time.
Chandler: Hey! Howd the audition go?
Ross: (entering) Okay Pheebs, I know how we're going to figure this out. Okay, clear your mind and answer the first thing that comes into your head. Okay?
Chandler: How is that worse?!
Chandler: You didnt see how mad he was, yknow?
Chandler: Uhhuh, how did you know that?
Mr. Geller: Well you gotta get at it princess! When your mother and I were trying to conceive you, whenever she was ovulating, bam, we did it. Thats how I got my bad hip.
Joey: How could you do this to me Chandler?! This part couldve turned my whole career around!
Joey: (slaps Wayne on his cheek) How do you do there, Wayne? (Backs away.)
Monica: How crazy that wed run into you!
Chandler: Yeah, Ross sure is a great guy, yknow Ive always felt that how a young man turns out is a reflection on his father.
Monica: Yeah but see I have nothing to compare it too. So even if youre horrible, how would I know?
Phoebe: How can people do that?... (All but Phoebe walk away from the window in disgust.) Oh, you guys, look! Ugly Naked Guy got gravity boots!
Monica: How was your first day?
Phoebe: Well, this doesnt have to be so sad though. Yknow? Maybe instead of just thinking about how much youre gonna miss each other, you should like think of the things youre not gonna miss.
Ross: How is that important?
Chandler: Hi, how are ya?
Paul: How to make the next one even shorter?