words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe are there reading. Rachel is sitting on the couch flanked by Ross and Monica. She suddenly stops reading and starts blinking her left eye as if it's bothering her. The problem is that Joey is on her left and thinks she's winking at him and winks back. Ross is watching this and isn't quite sure of what to make of it.]
Phoebe: Ohh, give him a kiss for me!
Phoebe: (after he's gone) I am so sorry you got caught in the middle of that. I didn't mean to be so out there. I am furious with him!
Monica: Why are so mad at him?
Phoebe: Oh, this guy again. (She ignores him.)
Joey: Oh, I know how we can decide. Phoebe, show him your game!
(Ross pauses and looks at him, Joey motions for him to hurry up.)
Rachel: (really excited) Great!! It was very, very nice to meet you sir--Ow! Hey! What are you doing?! Are you crazy! (He took out that thing they use to look at people's retinas and looked at Rachel's when she was shaking his hand causing her to flinch and scream at him.)
(Monica stares at him.)
Joey: Man, I wish Ross was coming with us! Y'know? I'm gonna miss him!
Rachel: Well, wait a minute! The puss is good! It means it's healing! (Runs after him.)
Ross: Hey Pheebs, what 'cha reading? (Phoebe ignores him) Pheebs? (Turns away) Hello? (He sits down next to her and she moves over a bit.) Phoebe? (He moves closer and she keeps moving away.) Phoe-Phoebe! (They end up hanging over the arm rest.) Come on! (He grabs the magazine away from her.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are there. Ross is trying to figure out why Phoebe's mad at him.]
Rachel: Oh, did you beat him at a board game? He turns into such a baby when he starts to lose.
Chandler: Well, I don't know what mad him so mad, y'know? All I said was that uh, I didn't think this wasn't gonna be his big break, that this movie wasn't going to do anything for him, and that uh, y'know it didn't sound like a real movie--Okay, he should've pushed me off of the bridge.
Phoebe: Oh that's my grandma. (Joey holds the box away from him.) And thanks Joey she's having a really great time. (Joey is happy now.)
Chandler: (who has just entered) Is that Joey? Is that Joey? Let me talk to him! I wanna talk to him!
Chandler: Y'know, he won't even talk to me. How am I going to apologize to him if he won't even talk to me?
Monica: Well, maybe you should send him something. So that when he gets to Las Vegas he'll know that you're sorry.
Phoebe: Y'know what you should send him? A cartoon of cigarettes. 'Cause that why he could trade it for protection. No. That's prison.
The Grip: These got left for ya. (He hands him a bunch of helium balloons.)
(Ross turns around and sees Rachel sitting by the window. She is just glaring at him.)
Rachel: (giggles and cant look at him) Hi!
Ross: (to the girl sitting next to him) Hi there. How many, how many ah, did you sell?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its continued from earlier. Joey is now waking Chandler and telling him the news.]
Mrs. Geller: Oh, well, I'm so glad you brought him here then.
Mr. Waltham: Dont take that tone with me. (She looks evilly at him.) All-all right you can. (He looks over at Ross and Shrugs.)
Monica: I was laughing. (Patting him on the knee.)
(Ross looks at her, then leaves slamming the door behind him.)
[Scene: Central Perk. Everyone exept Phoebe and Chandler is there. Ross's beeper goes off and everyone exept him react.]
Monica: Well, thanks, we like him.
Phoebe: Oh, no-no, this place is totally healthy! Thatthis milk is mine. I bought this today, 'cause I was thirsty for milk, y'know. (She takes a swig of it, but has to turn away from him as she makes a face to show that it has gone bad.) Okay, let's go!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler has fallen asleep reading a book. Monica calls from the bedroom and wakes him up.]
Phoebe: No its not great. No, shes coming to tell Ross that she loves him.
Joey: Nope-op! I insist! (He hugs Chandler again and whispers to him.) You get the wine right?
Rachel: (to the closed door) Hang in there. You hang in there. (Gives him the raspberry.)
(Cut to Monica and Chandler, Monica is running up to him.)
[Scene: The hallway, Rachel is convincing Ross that Emily is good for him.]
Rachel: Oh, I cant believe I ever let him touch me with those fingers.
Ross: Well, then, I think, I think the guy is scum. I hate him. I mean I actuallyI-I physically hate him. I always have. You are way too good to be with a guy like that.
Rachel: Summer catalogue! (hands him the catalogue)
Ross: Yeah, but you were the one who got him back, y'know? You, you were great. ...Hey, we uh, we still have that, uh, that bottle of wine. You in the mood for, uh, something grape?
CHAN: OK, let's do it. [Monica looks at him funny] What?
(She stares at him and Ross realizes what shes thinking.)
[Scene: The Hospital, Marcel lies on the operating table while recovering from the anaesthetic, tucked up under a sheet like an infant in a huge bed. Ross sits beside him, as a smiling Chandler, Monica and Rachel look on.]
Ross: No, I cant. I would, I really would, but my son is here; I cant leave him. Isntyou dont think theres any way?
(Phoebe turns to Rachel and mimes remove a lid of a jar. Ross enters and Paul motions for Rachel to leave with him now.)
Ross: Well, that's cool. So did (She walks away from him and he shuts up.)
Mr. Waltham: You want a piece of me, sir? Is that what your saying? (Pointing at Jack and poking him) You want a piece of me?
Chandler: I don't get it, I mean, you just got him. How can he be an adult already?
Phoebe: Oh my God! I killed him! I killed another one! And this curse is getting stronger too, to bring down something that big.
[Scene: Monas Apartment, she and her date are making out as Ross flips through a magazine while lying behind the couch and sees something that he likes. Meanwhile, Monas date takes off Rosss shirt and Mona throws it on the floor. While they start making out again, Ross tries to pull the rug the shirt is on over to him, but while he does that he moves the coffee table and it bumps into the couch.]
Monica: (Gasps) What?!! You cannot tell him that!!
Rachel: (We see a flashback as Rachel describes what happened.) All right, we were shaking hands and he kinda leaned toward me Y'know maybe he was going to open the door, but I totally miss read him and I uhhh (The flashback shows that she kissed him on the cheek.)
Joey: Im missin picture time?! (Jumps over to look, Ross glares at him and he retreats.)
Rachel: Well, ultimately, I was trying y'know, I-I wanted tell him y'know, that I'm still in love with him.
Joey: Say that to him and you're golden. (She just glares at him.)
Rachel: All right, would-would you mind just not going out with him again? Okay, just the idea of you and he and all these women, its justAnd I know hes my assistant and I cant date himbut it just bothers me, all right?!
Phoebe Sr: No, no, thats just Chuck Magioni, I-I sold him a house last year! And Im very sorry, but I dont know where your Father is, and thats the truth.
Joey: Im sorry man, I didntIm-Im sorry. Im sorry. (Goes over and comforts him.)
Frank: (To Phoebe) What's with him?
Phoebe: Oh, just ask him!
Phoebe: Tell him it's for you.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) So did you ask him?
Rachel: When I saw him get off that plane with her, I really thought I hit rock bottom. But today, it's like there's rock bottom, 50 feet of crap, then me.
Janice: Here, Ross, take our picture. (Hands him a camera and he starts snapping) Smile! You're on Janice Camera!
Rachel: Monica, this is Dan (points to him), one of the guys that we're gonna be going out with on Saturday. (Mouths "He's yours." to her.) Uh Dan, Monica.
(Ross turns and wants to attack Rachel, but Joey stops him.)
Waitress: Hey Monica, theres a customer who wants to complement the chef, should I let him in?
PHOEBE: Today we're gonna start with some songs about barnyard animals. [singing] Oh, the cow in the meadow goes moo, Oh, the cow in the meadow goes moo. Then the farmer hits him on the head and grinds him up, And that's how we get hamburgers. Nooowww, chickens!
Joey: (glares at him for a moment, then admits grudgingly) Maybe. Well, I just think you guys can do better than this house, you know? Or any other house for that matter.
Mark: Ahh! Fair, schmair! Y'know? Look, if you want to get back at Ross, I am here for you. Really? No-no, I say-I say, I say we get back at him right on this couch. Right here!
Phoebe: My massage client, Arthur? His daughter called and said that some guy that worked for me gave him a really weird massage this afternoon.
Monica: So anyway, I'm cooking dinner for him Monday night. You know, kind of like an audition. And Phoebe, he really wants you to be here, which will be great for me because then you can 'ooh' and 'ahh' and make yummy noises.
CHANDLER: I don't know, Richard's really nice and everything, uh, it's just that we don't know him really well, ya know, and plus he's, ya know, old [Monica gives him a glare] -er than some people, but, uh, younger than some buildings.
Rachel: Oh yeah! (Turns to face him.)
Chandler: Yes. Yes. (Lets him up.)
(They both grab him and stop him.)
Chandler: No, Im afraid I wont be able to make love as well as him.
Policeman: And in the meantime you better let him drive. Does he have a license?
CHANDLER: So, whaddya say boys, should I call him? [squeezes the ear of one of the slippers and it barks] Well, ya know what they say. Ask your slippers a question... you're going crazy.
Joey: Why dont you tell me something I dont know! (He storms out, and once Treeger closes the door behind him, Joey makes an Oops! have.)
Phoebe: That might work! (She gives him the coat.)
(Monica and Chandler turn and stare at him.)
Monica: What?! I mean, I didn't work this hard and-and-and lose all this weight so that I can give my flower to someone like him!
Rachel: I haven't seen him in so long!
Joey: No, look. (Shows him the magazine.)
Monica: Oh my God! Fog him! Fog him!
PHOEBE: No because I chickened out the last time when I tried to meet him. So I mean coincidences? I don't think so.
Chandler: (glares at him) I hope he did!
[Scene: Ross' apartment. Ross is grading papers. Charlie approaches him.]
Chloe: Oh, okay. (to the bartender) Hey, two beers. (sits down next to him)
Monica: What one? You wanted him to invite you to the party and he did it!
Rachel: (entering) Oh-ho, my God! That was so awesome! You totally got him back for calling you fat! He was just drooling all over you. That must've felt so great!
Rachel: Oh! Get over it soldier, we've gotta do this! (She pulls him towards her and throws him onto the barcalounger) Ok. Aha! You like that huh?
Joey: Man, we gotta do something about that guy. This morning, I caught him looking into our apartment. It creeps me out! I feel like I can't do stuff!
Monica: Okay, so how do I make him think I wanna have sex with him?
Rachel: Then, you will definitely get him back!
Monica: Chandler! (Motions for him to come outside.)
Ross: (entering from the bedroom) Hey, what's goin' on? (Pats Chandler on the shoulder which causes him to jump.)
Monica: Chandler! (Follows him out.)
Phoebe: Okay. Umm, before we get started, I just wanna say for the record that I love Ross, I think hes such a great guy. Here. (Hands her the picture, Rachel grabs it out of her hand.) Okay, now, close your eyes. And imagine that youre with Ross okay and imagine that youre kissing him. And youre-youre running your hands all over his body. And then you run your hands through his hair, but eew-oh gross its some kind of grease, itsuck! Hah?
(Rachel turns and stares at him.)
The A.D: Yeah, we loves em. Ive never seen him with(He gets a whiff of Joey and starts smelling around.)
Monica: Hey! (she sits down next to him) Its me. Mon-i-ca! Can I just tell you how proud I am of you.
Rachel: No, happy for you! (Hits him harder.)
(They both start laughing at him.)
Phoebe: Okay, this will keep them away from your stuff. (Writes him a note and the gang reads it.)
Joey: That's way uptown! That's like three trains away! (Phoebe pinches him.) Which is great! I love to ride that rail!
Rachel: Really?! The Plaza?!! Oh daddy!! (Hugs him and Phoebe glares at her.) Right. Daddy, I need to talk to you. Please, sit down.
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's, Chandler is sitting on one of the chairs and the duck is running around him and quacking.]
Cookie: So what. I say, punch him.
Krista: You are so bad! (Hits him softly.)
Krista: You are! (Hits him softly.)
Ross: (imitating Parker) This room! This night! That waiter! His shoes! I must take a mental picture! (He backs into someone.) Ooh sorry (He looks behind him then notices its Phoebe then stops his impression.)
Rachel: (worried) Be-cause Ross is the father of my child! You know... and I... want him to hook up with lots of women! (pause) I just... All I'm saying is... I don't think that Joey and Charlie have anything in common.
(Ross just stares at him until he figures it out.)
Phoebe: Oh, I'm going to give him something else besides joy, just (She scowls at him.)
Chandler: Scared me out of ever wanting to live with him.
Robin: (starting to cry) Ooh, (to Rachel) Can I have a napkin, please? Could you please hand me a napkin? (Rachel tries to grab one, but is to slow for his tastes.) Would you--Give me this thing (grabs the napkin holder from her.) all right!! Enough! (to Billy) And you are no longer my friend! We are finished! (gets up to leave) Nada!! No more! You are a bastard for doing this!! (Billy follows him) Get away from me!!
(Another man walks up with a drink in his hand, Phoebe stops him too.)