words in movies
MRS. GELLER: Oh hi kids. Hi darling.
MR. GELLER: Oh thank you.
MRS. GELLER: Well, you kids thank Dr. Burke for the ride?
[Scene: The Gellers' kitchen. Monica, Mrs. Geller and one of Mrs. Geller's friends are preparing the cake.]
MRS. GELLER: No, Richard Burke gave them a ride.
MRS. GELLER: Sooo, Richard's shopping in the junior section.
MRS. GELLER: We just know she's got the IQ of a napkin.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's party. Mr. Geller and a friend are questioning Richard while Ross observes.]
MR. GELLER: C'mon, tell us.
MR. GELLER: C'mon Rich, it's my birthday, let me live vicariously.
MR. GELLER: Ahh, what's a little mid-life crisis between friends?
MR. GELLER: Look, I know what you're going through. When I turned 50 I got the Porsche. You... you got your own little speedster.
MR. GELLER: Tell you what, maybe one of these weekends you can borrow the car and I cou. . .
MR. GELLER: What? I'm kidding. You know I'd never let him touch the Porsche.
RICHARD: [walks out of the bathroom and runs into Mrs. Geller who is going to the bathroom] Judy, going to the bathroom, good for you.
MRS. GELLER: Thank you Richard, I appreciate the support.
[Monica jumps in the shower. Right after Mrs. Geller enters the bathroom, Mr. Geller peeks his head in.]
MR. GELLER: Honey. Honey, have you seen my Harmon Kilerbrew bat? Bob doesn't believe I have one.
MRS. GELLER: I have no idea. Did you know Richard has a twinkie in the city?
MR. GELLER: I know. He's like a new man. It's like a scene from Cocoon.
MRS. GELLER: I just never would have pictured Richard with a bimbo.
MR. GELLER: Apparently, he told Johnny Shapiro that she's quite a girl. In fact, he told Johnny that he thinks he's falling in love with her.
MRS. GELLER: Really.
MR. GELLER: I tell you, I've never seen him this happy.
MRS. GELLER: So Jack, you ever think about trading me in for a younger model?
MR. GELLER: Of course not. With you it's like I've got two 25-year-olds.
MRS. GELLER: [they start kissing] Oh Jack stop.
MR. GELLER: C'mon, it's my birthday.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's birthday party. Mr. and Mrs. Geller enter looking particularly refreshed. Monica follows looking rather pale.]
MR. GELLER: Who's drink can I freshen?
MRS. GELLER: Almost time for cake.
[Mrs. Geller and Ross both enter]
MRS. GELLER: Richard. Richard. Your son isn't seeing anyone is he?
MRS. GELLER: Well, I was thinking, why doesn't he give Monica a call?
MRS. GELLER: Oh?
MRS. GELLER: She never tells us anything. Ross, did you know Monica's seeing someone?
MRS. GELLER: So, who's the mystery man?
MRS. GELLER: A real doctor?
MRS. GELLER: Well that's wonderful. . . I
MRS. GELLER: Jack. Could you come in here for a moment? NOW!
MR. GELLER: [enters with his bat] Found it.
MRS. GELLER: It seems your daughter and Richard are something of an item.
MR. GELLER: That's impossible, he's got a twinkie in the city.
MR. GELLER: You're the twinkie?
MRS. GELLER: Oh please, a relationship.
MR. GELLER: Am I supposed to stand here and listen to this on my birthday?
MR. GELLER: When did I say that?
Mr. and Mrs. Geller: What?!
Mrs. Geller: It was you?
Mr. Geller: What happened son?
Mr. Geller: Boy, Im glad I wore the big belt today.
Mrs. Geller: (lying) Ive gotta call my friend Mary and tell her how good this is, from Monicas room.
Mrs. Geller: Ross, drugs? Divorced? Again?
Ross: No, no-no, Ross Geller.
[Time lapse. The gang is sitting down for Thanksgiving dinner. Chandler is at the head of the table, Mr and Mrs Geller are to his right. Joey and Ross are to his left. Monica is serving things. Phoebe is in the living room and Rachel is at the sink.]
Mr. Geller: (embarrassed) Judy, the kids..
The Professor: Dr. Geller, Kurt Rathman, Im a professor in the paleontology department here.
Mrs. Geller: (pointing to herself and Jack) Well we left ours in Monicas bedroom.
Rachel: (reading) 'Gone for more jars. Back later. Monica Geller.'
The Museum Official: (on phone) Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chase museum. Im calling for Monica Geller. I want to let her know that there was a cancellation and if shes still interested in having the Bing-Geller wedding at our facility, it is available (Chandler runs to answer the phone.)
Elizabeth: Professor Geller?
Mr. and Mrs. Geller: Yes. (They look at Chandler angrily.)
MR. GELLER: There you go. So she dips into her savings, that's what it's there for. She's gonna be fine, and if you need a little extra, you know where to find it. [pulls a quarter from behind her ear]
Elizabeth: Professor Geller?
Elizabeth: You wanted to see me Professor Geller?
Rachel: Oh-oh Professor Geller.
Mrs. Geller: Do you know what it's like to grow up with someone who is critical of every single thing you say?
Mr. Geller: And we kinda figured about the porch swing.
Professor Feesen: Professor Geller!
Mrs. Geller: Not that old crow, my mother. (They stop and she kisses Monica on the cheek.) Congratulations darling.
Mrs. Geller: Stupid Jack, the word is stupid.
Elizabeth: This is my father, Paul Stevens. Dad, this is Ross Geller.
Judge: And based on the fact that Mr. Geller is intravenous drug user.
Mr. Geller: I remember when we first got engaged.
Mr. Geller: (ignoring her) Well, Id gotten Judy pregnant. I still dont know that happened.
Mr. Geller: We have it. Only now, we call it the beach house.
Mr. Geller: It seemed like such a simple idea.
Monica: Well Im Monica Geller, ball like a baby.
Benjamin: Certainly. Dr. Geller, which 1965 Shirelles hit was later covered by a popular British invasion band?
"Whenever I get married, guess who wont get to sing? Somebody named Geller! And somebody else named Bing!"
Mrs. Geller: You tell her Jack, I cant do it.
Mr. Geller: What?! They wanted a scary story!
Ross: Im a professor here uh, Ross Geller.
[Scene: The Geller household kitchen, Monica and Phoebe are cooking for Mrs. Gellers party.]
Mr. Geller: Ok, I have dandruff. Theres no need to laugh and point.
Mrs. Geller: She's upstairs. Monica! Come down! Everyone's here! Ross, Rachel, and the boy who hates Thanksgiving.
Mr. Geller: And if you see Rita Moreno, let her know Im looking for her.
Mr. Geller: Which means you had seven years of beach fun and you cant put a price on that sweetie.
[Scene: Ross and Monicas parents garage, Ross and Monica are arriving to go through their things. Mr. Geller is in the garage.]
Chandler: Hey! I will have you know that... aah, who am I kidding. Let's call the kid Geller and let Bing die with me.
Monica: Anyway, Ross and I were always captains, and um, it got kindve competitive and one year, Geller Bowl VI, I accidentally broke Rosss nose.
Mr. Geller: Happy birthday, sweetie! Give us a hug! (Starts to get up.)
Mrs. Geller: Were sorry honey, but we just assumed if you got married after you turned 30 youd pay for it yourself.
Mr. Geller: Im here!
Mr. Geller: Hi. God, it seems like just yesterday you guys used to come out to watch me work.
Mr. Geller: Im sorry we cant store your childhood things anymore.
Mr. Geller: So its just your mother then.
Mr. Geller: Im afraid so.
Mr. Geller: We started saving again when you were dating Richard and then that went to hell, so we redid the kitchen.
Mr. Geller: Well, shell understand right? Its not like I did it on purpose.
Mr. Geller: Really?
Mr. Geller: Great!
Mr. Geller: Oh my God, does she really thinks that?
Mr. Geller: (overacting) Thats a good one! Do you hear that Ross? Three days!
Mr. Geller: Oh, yeah you loved that glove! You took it every place you went. You never went any place without that glove.
Mr. Geller: Well, the white seems to be untouched. (He throws it back into the box as Mr. Geller moves a tarp and makes a discovery.) Uh-oh.
Mr. Geller: So, I think youre boxes are over here. (They walk over to them.)
Mr. Geller: Oh look, look theres your old makeup kit!
Mr. Geller: Sure!
Mr. Geller: (grabbing a glove) This couldve been hers!
Mr. Geller: (To Ross) Screw it! Im having one. (Takes out and lights a cigarette.)
Mr. Geller: (To Monica) Why dont we take it for a spin?
Mr. Geller: (entering) How are you honey?
Mr. Geller: Its the key to my Porsche. Well, the key to your Porsche.
Mr. Geller: Crap.
Mrs. Geller: (To Chandler) Youve done a wonderful job with this party Chandler. Everything looks so lovely.
Mr. Geller: Its older than that. Ross was actually conceived right near this tuxedo.
Mrs. Geller: Jack!
Mrs. Geller: Oh-ho, I think its nice.
Mr. Geller: No. Your mother really did the work. I was busy with the business. I wasn't around that much. Is that what this is about?
Mr. Geller: I always thought that too. Tell me, what does your father do?
Mrs. Geller: Speech! Come on Monica!
Mr. Geller: You dont secretly smoke do you?
(Joey walks away and Mr. and Mrs. Geller walk up. Mr. Geller is wearing this ancient velvet tuxedo.)
Mr. Geller: Well, its time for a new family to start their memories here and hopefully their check will clear before they find the crack in the foundation and the asbestos in the ceiling.
Lewis: Professor Geller?
Mrs. Geller: (shaking her hand) Its lovely to meet you.
Mr. Geller: What?! Ive never seen one before!
(Mr. and Mrs. Geller start to walk away.)
Mr. Geller: I thought he was with you.
Mrs. Geller: You could kick anyones ass you want too.
Mr. Geller: Doctor Ross Geller.
(Rachel and Mrs. Geller enter.)
[Cut to Mr. and Mrs. Geller talking to Ross.]
Mr. Geller: of course you can kick his ass son.
Mrs. Geller: Yeah, the list thatof people were allowed to sleep
Mr. Geller: Your mother just added him to her list.
Mrs. Geller: I certainly see what the girls like coming here.
Mrs. Geller: Here comes the bride.
Mr. Geller: You cant ask us son, thats cheating.
(Mr. Geller turns the corner.)
Chandler: See? (Does his laugh.) Here we go. (Starts walking her to their room, and has to pass in front of Mr. Geller whos sitting at the table and Mrs. Geller whos standing next to him.)
Mrs. Geller: Oh I wish youre grandmother had lived to see this.
Mr. Geller: I love you sweetheart. (He kisses her and they sit down.)
Little Girl: Dr. Geller?
Mr. Geller: Way to go son! I knew youd find him!
Little Girl: Dr. Geller, will you dance with me?