words in movies
Teleplay by: Mark Kunerth Story by: Peter Tibbals Transcribed by: Cassie With Help From: Eric Aasen
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, theyre returning from the party.]
Ross: and then, we couldve gone from the ceremony to the reception with you in the sidecar!
Ross: Hey! All that stuff you said about true love, you were right, I mean, we did learn a lot from Mom and Dad! And that picture of Chi-Chi with her mischievous grin. And what you said about Nana. Ohh, yeah she really wouldve wanted to be there. And you know what? I think she was.
(All are returning from the street after picking up dropped lottery tickets)
Ross: This... this is exactly what I'm talking about. What kind of a guy makes... makes... delicate French cookies, huh? They're not even... butch, manly cookies with... with... you know with... with chunks. (takes a careful bite from the cookie)
Monica: What about all the guys that you've got the phone numbers from? Why don't you just kiss one of them?
Ross: Marcel is an illegal exotic animal. I'm not allowed to have him in the city. If they find him, they'll take him away from me.
Phoebe: (coming back from the bathroom) What's up? (she sees the gift certificate in Rachel's hands) Hey, Rachel!!
Conan: For example, I dont have to memorize lines. You guys actually have to remember what to say and you probably forget from time to time. Yes?
Joey: (sipping red wine from a glass) Who says that wine has to cost more than milk!
[The next clip is from The One With The Jellyfish.]
Rachel: Are you gonna... you're going to take Hugsy away from a little child?
Rachel: Ok, that's it! Just give'em to me! I'll split them up! (she tries to snatch the bowl from Joey's hands but she can't, so she pinches his nipple and she manages to take it)
(He starts to walk to the bathroom and hears the hypnosis tape from Chandlers bedroom.)
Steve: Oh, OK. (he drops the box on the floor) Oh, sorry. (When she bends down to pick it up he grabs a package of Gummi-bears from the cabinet.)
Chandler: Aside from adoption the only other choice is insemination, so... we're talking about sperm donors.
Announcer: From New York City, New York! Appearing in his Ultimate Fighting Championship debut! Hes known for his confrontational business style. Ladies and Gentlemen, introducing Pete Beck-errrr!!
Chandler: Hey! Look I brought a friend for dinner, this is Zack, from work!
(Phoebe moves in the dressing room from which Charlie went out)
WAITER: (with tray and two drinks)� Excuse me.� Um, these are from the two gentlemen at the end of the bar.
Monica: Ohmygod! Rat baby! Rat baby! Rat baby! (screams from another room)
Ross: Id bet Id still be doing my kara-tay. (Thats karate, hes just saying it that way.) Towards the end of our marriage I was doing a lot of kara-tay as a way of releasing the tension from yknow, not doing anything else physical.
[The next one is from Episode 512: The One With Chandlers Work Laugh, Joey and Phoebe are betting on who will reach the treat the fastest, the chick or the duck.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica emerges from the bathroom.]
[Scene: Ross's hotel room. Ross and is reading his keynote speech to Charlie from his laptop]
Ross: I don't think that your monologue from Star Wars is gonna help me right now, Joe!
Ross: That's Ben, my son from my first marriage.
(Ross and Charlie walk into the hall from Ross's room)
Ross: (from across the wall) Walls are pretty thin, guys!
Chandler: How can she be great if shes from Poughkeepsie? (laughs, at they all look at him) That joke wouldve killed in Albany.
[Scene: the hotel lobby. Monica, Phoebe, Chandler and Mike walk in from the outside.]
RACHEL: Nothing, I mean, um, it is your first time with her and, you know if the first time doesn't go well, well then that's, that's pretty darn hard to recover from.
Monica: Well, at least you have one thing to be happy about. That jerk Gavin from your office didn't show up (Gavin shows up at the balcony windows).
Phoebe: (picks up a coin from her bra) Monica, you call it.
Chandler: (flattered) No,... no... (realizing) NO! (He quickly gets several steps away from her.) Look, I'm, I'm married!
Monica: Okay. (Chandler grabs the dish from Monica and hands it to Will who starts dishing out a large helping.)
(they start to get ready, but then Phoebe enters through the door from Ross's room)
[Flashback to 209 - TOW Phoebe's Dad] [Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Joey and Chandler are giving out their Christmas presents out of a cardboard box from a case of motor oil.]
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, continued from earlier, everyone is now in the living room drinking champagne.]
(The nurse attending to the babies hears this, turns and stares at Chandler. Chandler moves Monica to the side and away from the nurse.)
[Scene: In the store. Rachel and Phoebe returning from the changing rooms]
(Chandler enters from the bathroom)
Monica: Look what I found in the drawer... (Chandler looks up from his book.) And you said I'd never wear this...
Monica: Oh. Well, I didn't realize that you needed it back right away. I mean, you told me to go and be a caterer. So I went. I beed. I mean, I... I used it to buy all this stuff. But lookI've got another job tomorrow, so I'll pay you back with the money I make from that.
(Ross enters from the kitchen with three plates with flan.)
Ross: (a little embarassed by their conversation) I'm good, I have dinner plans (moves away from them).
[Scene: The beach house, its the same scene from the end of last year, with Ross in front of the two doors of Rachels and Bonnies rooms, trying to decide which door to choose. He finally chooses the one his right and goes in.]
[The next one is from Episode 603: The One With Rosss Denial, Joey is amazing Phoebe and Monica by holding his breath.]
Phoebe: Yeah, I dreamt that he saved me from a burning building and he was so brave and so strong! And its making me look at him totally differently. Yknow, I mean he used to be just, yknow Jack Geller Monica and Rosss dad and now hes hes Jack Geller, dream hunk."
(He turns around frantically from side to side.)
Chandler: Kinda... you know, sneaking around, having to hide from you guys...
(Lifts her head from Joey's shoulder)
(Joey comes out from his room, yawning)
Rachel: Well this has story behind it! I mean they had to ship it all the way from the White Plains store.
Joey: Oh! I got it! Ok, everyone pick a number from one to ten. Alright? Whoever gets the highest number gets to go first.
Chandler: Oh, so thats why the priest threw holy water on me. (theres no reaction from Joey) Okay, listen, you have to cheer up! Okay? You should come out with Ross and me, I mean anything is better than sitting around here crying all day about Kate.
Chandler: You called everyone and said you were having trouble finding a Santa costume, so I borrowed one from a guy at work!
Amy: (yelling from outside) Rachel!! Open up!! It's your sister!! (she knocks on the door again) I have to talk to you!!
Joey: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no... I think it's better if you tell him, you know. It's easier for a woman. That way, you know, if he gets mad, all you have to do is go... I didn't mean it. I'm so so--ooory. (he pushes his breasts together from the side)
Joey: No! No... and, for the record, I've also never given her a frosting from a can!
Monica: I proposed to Chandler! (Phoebe stops herself from laughing) Alright, moving on...
Rachel: (trying to divert his attention from the window by jumping up and down) HI!! Hi!
(Amy approaches from behind)
[Cut back to the living room. Chandler slowly exits the bathroom and gets pushed from behind by Monica and sees Phoebe closing the apartment door.)
Joey: (Yelling from Rachel's room) She has a lot of crap!
Phoebe: Oh, I'm just so exhausted from dragging around this... (she shows her ring) HUGE engagement ring!
[Scene: Central Perk. Frank Jr., Phoebe and the triplets are there. Continued from earlier.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Continued from earlier.]
Joey: (enters from his bedroom) What?
Amy: (looks confused) N-no... uhm... did I buy a falafel from you yesterday?
Joey: I got it from Monica. She sold it to me for a very reasonable price.
Chandler: Yeah, I miss that too. I tell you what; from now on well make time to hang out with each other.
(Joey's eyes are twice their size now, and looks nervously from Rachel to Gladys and back.)
(Suddenly Ross jumps up from behind the counter armed with a plastic gun. By the way, hes overacting too.)
Ross: But all kidding aside, in much the same way that Homo ergaster [1] is now thought to be a separate species from Homo erectus...
Phoebe: Yeah, I really do. You know, I had nothing growing up. (thinks for a few seconds) Just like the kids I took the money from.
Phoebe: That’s right, I've prepared a song for Emma. From my heart to hers. For there’s no greater gift, than the gift of music. (she starts singing) Emma! Your name poses a dilemma. 'Cause not much else rhymes with Emma! Maybe the actor Richard Crenna, he played the commanding officer in Rambo. Happy birthday Emma!
Chandler: Why come all the way from Kansas to do that?
Charlie: I'm pretty sure, professor Spafford from Cornell?
Monica: Yeah, but we haven't heard a thing from the adoption agency and it has been weeks!
Joey: (smiling from ear to ear) Ah-haah! I win!!
Joey: (whispering) Who do you think its from?
Rachel: I don't know... maybe it's because she has got such callousy fingers from playing crummy guitar...
Ross: Let me see this... (he takes the trophy from Rachel's hands) Grand Supreme Little Darling, New York Division.
(Monica enters from the spare bedroom.)
Chandler: All right, check it out. Check this out. It says here that theres a place you can go to rent videos of all the museums! (Reading from the book.) "Its almost as good as being there."
(Rachel enters from the main door)
Phoebe: oh, well, Ross probably has it, you can get it from him later.
Mrs. Green: Now dont worry! Everythings gonna be okay. (Hugs Rachel while she is standing and Rachel is sitting, seeing this Monica decides to join in on the hugging by hugging Mrs. Green from behind her back.)
Chandler: Well, our names really are Monica and Chandler. We're from New York.
Rachel: Oh, you're gonna love this cake. I got it from a bakery in New Jersey, Corino’s.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is returning from his disastrous weekend. He throws his bag down and sits down on one of the leather chairs, but he sits on something and picks it up and throws it away.]
Rachel: Yeah, down from seven hundred, you are saving like two hundred bucks!
Ross: I can't believe this. Not even my geology lab partner? And I carried that guy! (gets up from his sofa)
(from 1.18 - "The One With All the Poker")
(from 3.09 - "The One With All the Football")
(from 5.08 - "The One With the Thanksgiving Flashbacks")
Rachel: (running from the guy's apartment with Joey in tow) Hey, what's-what's going on?!
(from 1.07 - "The One With The Blackout")
(from 5.15 - "The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey")
(from 6.06 - "The One On The Last Night")
Joey: Shh, OK, here I come, here I come. See I'm comin' to fix the copier, I can't get to the copier, I'm thinkin' what do I do, what do I do so I just watch 'em have sex. And then I say, wait, here's my line, (Joey from TV) you know that's bad for the paper tray.
(from 1.09 - "The One Where Underdog Gets Away")