words in movies
Part 1 written by: Shana Goldberg-Meehan & Scott Silveri Part 2 written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Directed by: Kevin S. Bright Transcribed by: Andreina, Eleonora, Pheeboh, Sebastiano & Vanessa
Phoebe: I think David would probably wanna hear a few lectures.
Monica: David, can you help me?! I'm trying to explain to Chandler how a plane stays in the air.
David: Oh, certainly. That's a combination of Bernoulli's principle and Newton's third law of motion.
David: Mike is your ex... uh... boyfriend!
David: It's ok. Ho-honest mistake.
Phoebe: I'm sooo sorry!! I just... I keep thinking about Mike! I'm crazy about David, and we're having so much fun together. Why-Why do I miss Mike? That's-that's gonna go away, right?
David: (to Chandler) Well, Phoebe's still pretty hung up on that Mike, uh?
David: Still you know, a girl calls you by your ex-boyfriend's name, that-that's not a good thing, right?
Chandler: David, let me stop you there 'cause I think I see where this is going. I'm not very good at giving advice. So if you want advice, go to Ross, Monica, or... Joey, if the thing you wanna advice about is pizza toppings or burning sensation when you pee.
David: Sorry, I just... I wish there was something I could do, you know? Well, you know Phoebe...
David: I'm sorry, uh... I just wish I could make her forget about Mike already, you know... Why did Phoebe and Mike break up?
Chandler: Oh, because his penis was too big. (he notices that David is not amused) Oh, I'm sorry, that's the kind of thing I do. (pause) They broke up because Mike didn't want to get married. Hey, what if you just let Phoebe know you'd be open to marriage?
David: That's great! That's great! I-I'll propose to her!
David: Well, I was probably going to do it at some point.
David: Why not? It's brilliant! (talking to an imaginary Mike) Goodbye Mike, we'll see you at the wedding, fella! (pause) well, we probably won't invite you to the wedding... (to Chandler) Thank you, Chandler. Sincerely.
David: (after a while) How do you think I should propose?
Chandler: David, I'm pretending to read here!!
Monica: Wow! That Mike thing was interesting! I don't know what's gonna happen with Phoebe and David.
Chandler: David is going to propose to Phoebe.
[Scene: Barbados, hotel lounge. David, Phoebe and Rachel have just arrived.]
Joey: Come on, I'll show you guys where to check in (Joey, Chandler and David leave)
Phoebe: (shouts after David) Oh! David, get one for us too! Oh, oh, and see if they have a heart-shaped one! And with mirrors on the ceiling!
David: So, ehm... I'm proposing to Pheobe tonight. (Removes a ring box from his pocket and opens it to show Chandler the ring)
David: Yeah, well, being a failed scientist doesn't pay quite as well as you might think. That's uhm... one seventieth of a karat. And the clarity is uhm... is quite poor.
Chandler: David is going to propose to Phoebe tonight!
MOnica: Ok, my husband just gave your boyfriend some very bad advice. Look, David is going to propose to you tonight.
Phoebe: Sure! Look, ok, bottom line: I love Mike... David! David. I love David. Don't look at me that way, Roseanne Rosannadanna!
Monica: This is Monica! I'm Phoebe's friend. Listen, Phoebe is back with David and he's going to propose to her, and she is going to say "yes" but I know she really wants to be with you!
Mike: Look, if Phoebe wants to marry David, she should, I'm not gonna stand in the way of that and neither should you.
Monica: Phoebe is going to say "Yes" to David. See, that's what happens when you meddle in people's lives!
(Phoebe and David walk in)
Monica: I can't believe she's gonna say yes to David. She's clearly in love with Mike.
(David and Phoebe sit down at a table close to Chandler and Monica's)
David: Uh, Phoebe, uh, I have... something I wanna say.
Chandler: I think we have some time. Have you ever heard him talk? (doing David) "Uh, Phoebe, uh, I would be honoured, uh..." Spit it out, David!
David: Uh, Phoebe, uh... (Chandler hits his own head) you're an amazing woman, and the time we spent apart was, was unbearable. Of course the sanitation strikes in Minsk didn't help!
David: But well, now that we're together again, I don't ever want to be apart. So, to that end...
(David produces the ring. At the same time, Mike walks in, behind David)
David: It's David, actually!
David: (turns around) Hi Mike!
Mike: Hi David. Chandler. Monica... (Looks at Monica, checking her big hair, aghast) Oh!
David: I have a question I was kinda gonna ask her myself.
David: (annoyed) Ok, would you care for my seat as well?
David: That's fair, you've had a long trip. (he leaves his seat to Mike, and stands there looking for a chair. He finally goes to Monica and Chandler's table)
David: Kinda stepped on the toes of what I was going to say.
Mike: Sorry David, but she really has to know this.
David: Alright, but after this I want to see you outside. If the rain stops.
David: I have a ring.
David: Phoebe, will you marry me?
David: Uhm... Ha ha!
David: Ok, I'm gonna take off.
Phoebe: David, I'm so sorry, I'm sorry.
David: Just so I know, if I had asked first...
David: Please, you don't have to explain. I mean, perhaps if I hadn't gone to Minsk things would have worked out for us. And I wouldn't have ruined my career, or lost that toe to frostbite. It was a good trip! (he leaves)
(Ross is dumbfounded to see Mike instead of David)
David: Well, after eight years of research I discovered that it can't be done.
David: Phoebe! Hi!
David: Good, good, life is good...
Phoebe: David?
David: Wow, you look unbelievable.
David: Yeah, I don't know why, I'm sorry, I guess I just didn't want to lose face.
David: Ah well, I-I'm seeing someone.
David: Do you wanna get a drink?
David: You're kidding me. Because I'm not seeing anybody, I've just totally made that up.
David: Yeah, I know. Well... this is probably a stupid question, seeing that you look like that, but do you have some place that you need to be right now?
Rachel: No, that's David.
David: Great.
(Charlie and Rachel arrive. They see David and Phoebe leave)
David: Do you smell beets?
David: Well, I'm back from Minsk... permanently.
Phoebe: I mean... (David kisses Phoebe on the cheek, makes his way to the door and turns around again)
Part I Written by: Greg Malins Part II Written by: David Crane & Marta Kauffman Parts I & II Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Part I Written by: Greg Malins & Adam Chase Part II Written by: David Crane & Marta Kauffman Parts I & II Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
David: I-I... Oh I...I just wanna say uhm... if you do ever come to Minsk, that's my number (gives Mike a business card) We'll uhm... we'll party up Vladnik style. (He leaves again)
David: She's also a scientist, so she's very smart and pretty and... well, it's actually because of you, really, that we're together, I mean, I saw what you had with that Mike guy, and I just said "Boy, I want that".
Written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Directed by: Kevin Bright Transcribed by: Kreidy
Teleplay by: David Crane & Marta Kauffman Story by: Wil Calhoun Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
David: Well, i-it's okay. I-I-I understand... Well, s... well, are you happy with this guy?
(David puts his napkin up to his mouth and starts laughing at his own line. Matt notices him after a while and starts laughing as well.)
David: Damn it! I-I'm sorry. I-I don't mean that. I-I want you to be happy... But only with me. No, uhm... that's not fair. Uh, who cares, leave him!. Oh, I don't mean that. Yes I do... I'm sorry Uhm, I... I think I should probably uhm... go...
{Transcibers note: In case you havent heard, Courteney Cox got married to David Arquette during hiatus and changed her name to Courteney Cox Arquette. But David was a busy boy during the off season for not only did he marry but everyone else as well. For theyre all listed as Jennifer Aniston Arquette, Lisa Kudrow Arquette, in an interesting twist Matt LeBlanc Arquette, Matthew Perry Arquette, David Schwimmer Arquette, and even the creators of the show are now David Crane Arquette and Marta Kauffman Arquette. I just wonder what the new sleeping arrangements are }
Phoebe: David! (He kisses her cheek) What-what are you doing here? Arent you supposed to be in Russia?
Written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane
David: Okay, okay, okay. (Gets ready to sweep, and then picks up a laptop computer) Y'know what, this was just really expensive. (Puts it down elsewhere. Then picks up a microscope) And I'll take- this was a gift. (Moves it)
David: It was Max's stuff. (They kiss)
David: Uh, that's definitely a, uh, valid question. And, uh, the answer would be (Writes YES on the board) yes. Yes I was. But, see, I wanted it to be this phenomenal kiss that happened at this phenomenal moment, because, well, 'cause it's you.
Phoebe: Of course, yeah.(they hug and Phoebe sighs... a little after that also David sighs and makes his way to the door) You know, a kiss on the cheek wouldn't be totally inappropriate...
David: That reminds me of you so much, I mean umm, it-its actually of Lenin. But, yknow at certain angles
Written by: Marta Kaufmann & David Crane Transcribed by: guineapig With Help From: Rachel Stigge
David: Right-o, right-o... (to Mike) Take good care of her. (and he leaves)
Written by: Wil Calhoun Directed by: David Schwimmer Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
David: Well, just for a couple of days, uhm... I'm here to explain to the people who gave us our grant, why it's a positive thing that we spent all their money and uhm... accomplished uhm... nothing.
David: Allright... But... if I ever do come back from Minsk... (points at Mike) well, you just better watch out.
(Over the sound of Phoebe singing we hear two scientists, Max and David, having a noisy discussion)
(David the scientist guy is standing at the news-stand)
David: Right. But, see, the longer I waited, the more phenomenal the kiss had to be, and now we've reached a place where it's just gotta be one of those things where I just like... sweep everything off the table and throw you down on it. And, uh, I'm not really a, uh, sweeping sorta fella.
Joey: David Lynn! David Lynn! David Lynn!! (Exits)
David: Are... are you kidding? You know, when you don't see someone for a long time, a-a-and you kind of build them up in your head and you start thinking about: Come on, don't be crazy. Nobody is that beautiful, but... well, you are. (Phoebe seems very charmed) Well, so, uhm... are you seeing... anyone? (Phoebe is still up on a cloud from what David just said)
Written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Produced by: Robert Carlock & Wendy Knoller Transcribed by: Coffee Mug, Eleonora, Sebastiano & Vanessa Final check by Kim
David: Yes, but uhm... You should know... she really likes you. I-In fact I-I-I don't think you realise j-just how lucky you are fella. (he points at Mike)
David: (Stands up and speaks more loudly) Sorry, I wa- I was just saying to my friend that I thought you were the most beautiful woman that I'd ever seen in my- in my life. And then he said that- you said you thought
Phoebe: Well... but David, just... I just want you to know that... that... you know... telling you this... is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.
Written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Transcribed by: Coffee Mug Russian to Roman alphabet: Gabriela Horber
David: (disappointed) Oh. Uh, what?
Max: Tell her, David. 'I don't wanna go to Minsk and work with Lifson and Yamaguchi and Flench, on nonononononono. I wanna stay here and make out with my girlfriend!!' (Storms out)
David: Yeah, I Well I really actually wanted to say umm, that, but um, I figured I probably shouldnt because yknow, I have to leave.
[Scene: Max and David's lab, David is explaining something to Phoebe with the aid of a whiteboard.]
Phoebe: Oh, David, I, I think you are a sweeping sorta fella. I mean, you're a sweeper! ...trapped inside a physicist's body.
David: Daryl Hannah was the most beautiful woman that he'd ever seen in his life and I said yeah, I liked her in Splash, a lot, but not so much in- in Wall Street, I thought she had kind of a
Written by: Dana Klein Borkow Directed by: David Schwimmer Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
David: Uh, I-I-I was hoping to run into you here. I didnt know whether I should call or not, yknow I-I was only in town for a few days. And yknow, I didnt want to intrude on your life or-or anything like that, but I-I really wanted to see you andbut I didnt know if you wanted to see me.
David: Please, clean my beakers. I dont get out of the lab much.
Phoebe: Look David, if... if you had never left, then... yeah, we'd probably still be together right now, but... you did leave, and I-I'm with Mike and I really care about him...
Written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane
David: The good thing about the young kids though, theyre completely unpredictable. Which is a lot of fun as an actor to respond with. But there was one story
(Joey hugs Rosss neck and has a look of complete contentment on his face which, after a short while, causes David and Matt to start laughing.)
Joey: No! No! No Pheebs, Im not gonna yell at you. I just yknow, started thinking about you and David and I remember how bummed you were the first time he left. And I just Oh Pheebs, come here. (He hugs her.) Are you okay?
David: Pivat!! (In a high pitched voice) Pivat!!!
Chandler: Oh, yeah. I'd marry him just for his David Hasselhof impression alone. You know I'm gonna be doing that at parties, right? (Does the impression)
David: Wa... wa... wait! We can... call them later. Can you just... just stand there f-f-for a moment? Boy! There's an old Russian expression, uhm... it goes: Schto ya ztez vigul... ui! Roughly translated that means uhm... This thing that I'm looking at: wow!
David: Noth- I was- I was just saying to my-
David: Well... just so you know... hearing it wasn't exactly a Vladnik carnival either... Can we at least hug goodbye?
David: Yuh.
David: ...Now? Now?
David: I don't know. I don't know what I'm gonna do. I just- you decide.
David: Okay, what the hell, what the hell. (Sweeps the remaining papers off the desk and grabs Phoebe) You want me to actually throw you or you-you wanna just hop?
David: Hey!
Max: No. Have you seen David?
David: Stay.
David: Rrrreally.
David: Please.
David: No, I'm... not going to Minsk.
David: Yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine.
(Phoebe leads David into a bedroom)
David: Yes I can. Because if I go it means I have to break up with you, and I can't break up with you.
David: Wow.
David: Uh, ow.
David: I'll never forget you.
Chandler: Does anyone else think David Copperfield is cute?
David: Hi! (Kisses her) What-what're you doing here?
(David is feeding Phoebe popcorn. Max walks up)
David: Uhm... uhm... Goodbye... Uh... Schto ya ztez vigul... ui... (David holds his hands gently on the back of Phoebe's neck. There's a sound of a a bunch of keys rattling, and the door opens... It's Mike)
Written by: Scott Silveri Directed by: David Schwimmer Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
David: Thank you, Max. Thank you.
Written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Transcribed by: Mindy Mattingly With Minot Adjustments by: Tennant Stuart
CHANDLER: No, Stephen Hurs was the kid who would eat anything for money, David Stein was the guy who had no elbows.
Written by: Sherry Bilsing-Graham & Ellen Plummer Directed by: David Schwimmer Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
David: No, but I'm asking-
David: Yeah, Im just, Im just in town for a conference. Umm, God you look phenomenal!
Written by: Brian Boyle Directed by: David Schwimmer Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Story by: David Crane & Marta Kauffman Teleplay by: Jeff Greenstein & Jeff Strauss Transcribed by: Mindy Mattingly Phillips With Minor Adjustments by: Dan Silverstein
Written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Transcribed by: Mindy Mattingly With Minor Adjustments by: Tennant Stuart
David: -make the decision-
Teleplay by: Scott Siveri Story by: David J. Lagana Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Max: Yoko. (To David) I've decided to go to Minsk without you.