words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Chandler are sitting and talking.]
Chandler: Yknow what? It seems like all of the sudden; so much has happened.
Chandler: Phoebe is, making people.
Chandler: And we just sit here. I mean if I die the only way people would even know I was here, would be by the ass print on this chair! Look, we have to do something. Okay? Something huge!
Chandler: No-no, not something stupid, something huge.
Chandler: Why not?! I mean its just, its just climbing! Its just, its just steep!
Chandler: Were going to Everest! Okay, it would be nice to leave an ass print on Everest!
Chandler: Yeah baby!
Chandler: (dejected) Yeah, well
Chandler: Yeah, we could do that without yknow risking our lives at all!
Joey: And while were down at the video store, you know what else we could rent? Die Hard! (Chandlers excited.) Oh, yknow what? I just remembered, that Everest thing is only available through mail order.
Chandler: (dejected) Oh, well
Chandler: Yeeeeahhhh.
Chandler: But Ill tell you something. One of these days were get off of our buts and rent Die Hard again!
Chandler: And I just want a million dollars! (He extends his hand hopefully.)
Monica: Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (To Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
Chandler: Uh-oh.
Chandler: She was not good. Not good.
Chandler: Uh-oh.
Chandler: (entering) Hello!
Chandler: (sarcastic) Noo.
Chandler: I didnt know that.
Chandler: See, maybe thats the one we shouldve actually hidden.
Chandler: This isnt one of those uh, yknow "If she doesnt come, we-we dont, we dont come?" Right? Because I already bought my ticket
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, it's Rachel birthday party and Chandler is about to spill the beans.]
Chandler: Oh, that's Ross's.
Chandler: Come on, Ross? Remember back in college, when he fell in love with Carol and bought her that ridiculously expensive crystal duck?
Chandler: (stuttering incoherently) F-hah.... flennin....
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross has just broken up with Julie and is about to get with Rachel.]
Chandler and Joey: Ohhh.
Ross: (starts to cry) FINE BY ME!! (he opens the door and traps Chandler behind it)
Chandler: I KNEW IT!!!!
Chandler: Ahh, so how many cameras are actually on you?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe are reading a book about things to do whilst in London.]
Chandler: All right, check it out. Check this out. It says here that theres a place you can go to rent videos of all the museums! (Reading from the book.) "Its almost as good as being there."
Chandler: Well, You could, but... probably just the one time.
Chandler: If we do that, we gotta get Die Hard.
Joey: Yeah, Chandler finds me so intimdating that its better if were on the same team.
Chandler: Well, I like danger.
Joey: (turning to Chandler in a scolding tone) Chandler!
Chandler: Oh, I am no women, but that is one tasty dish. (Phoebe walks in.)
Chandler: Well, if you're gonna work for mechanics, those are the ones to work for.
Monica: Mom, uh, Chandler was just saying how beautiful your sweater is.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, thank you Chandler! I just bought it.
Chandler: (shocked) What?
[Ross and Chandler get up and go into Rachels old room.]
Richard: (approaching them with a woman in tow) Monica! Chandler!
Chandler: How could it not matter?!
Chandler: (entering, sees Rachels throw) Ni-hi-ice!
Chandler: What?! Why did you do that?
Chandler: You do? Why?
[Cut back to Monica and Chandler telling Phoebe and Joey the story.]
Doug: (entering) Uh, I gotta apologize for Kara's coffee. Y'know, I feel sorry for it if it ever got in a fight, it's not strong enough to defend itself. (Chandler does not laugh.) Did you hear what I said Bing?
Ross: Okay, okay, Ill tell em it wasnt Chandler who got high. Now who should I say it was?
Chandler: The reason we havent told them were together is because they hate me, okay? So will you fix this?
Chandler: Okay! Okay! Everybody down! Everybody down! (Rachel turns off the lights and everyone crouches. As everyone crouches, a ripping noise erupts from the assemblage.)
Monica: Chandler come on. We have to hem the new dust ruffle.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is showing off the entertainment center.]
[Monica and Chandler make What was that? gestures. Joey and Ross go into Rachels old room.]
Chandler: I'm sor... Just go. Just go. I can't, I can't.
Chandler: Yeah, Im not gonna pay for those acting classes anymore.
Ross: Look Chandler, Monica is really weird about this kind stuff all right. Believe me, I lived with her for 16 years. She is going to freak out. Oh my God, she's going to sit on you.
Phoebe: No Chandler, they can swallow one of those little parts! And also, look at his smooth area, thats just gonna mess them up.
Chandler: Janices birthday is coming up, I want to get her something speacial. Come in here with me.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Phoebe is telling Chandler and Monica how she fought crime in her own way with the badge she found.]
Chandler: Uhh, yeah. She uh, she uh, she uh might've mentioned him.
Joey: Oh (To Chandler) Can you imagine if I hadnt left you that last one? You two mightve never gotten together. Ooh-ooh! Could you imagine if I sent that hooker up to the room like I was gonna?! Its like it was in the stars!
[Chandler exits to the balcony.]
Chandler: No problem roomie. (She turns around and hugs him.)
Ross: Wha? No no! Ah! (Ross scarfs all of his trifle down in about a second. He looks like hes going to throw up.) (Lying) All gone! So good! Maybe Chandler has some left.
[Chandler makes a fake "I know I couldnt believe it either" gesture.]
Chandler: All right, just, just take the entertainment center, and then when you get home, throw the canoe away!
[Inside Monica and Chandlers. Joey is almost done explaining the situation to everyone.]
Chandler: Look I'm very glad that you saved Ross from the car backfire, but y'know, it could've been a bullet and you y'know, you didn't try to save me!
Ross: Well I told you it was Chandler who was smoking the pot but it was me. Im sorry.
Chandler: Ye-ye-yeah, yes I do!
Mr. and Mrs. Geller: Yes. (They look at Chandler angrily.)
Ross: Monica and Chandler are living together!
[Chandler is mega shocked!]
Chandler: Thank you!
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Everyone is helping clean the table.]
Mr. Geller: No! Thank you! (Hugs Chandler) Monica, and Ross! I dont know what Im gonna do about the two of you!
Chandler: See now it feels like Christmas!
Chandler: I need you to come to this bachelor party for my weird cousin Albert, y'know he's the botanist.
Chandler: I dunno what it is, it just doesnt quite feel like Christmas to me.
Chandler: Hey Joe whats up?
Chandler: I can see why thats hard to resist.
Chandler: Ah, youre still just a little fat girl inside arent you? (He kisses her on the cheek)
Chandler: What, what are you laughing at?
Chandler: I dont think so.
Chandler: Howdy.
Chandler: (To Rachel) Oh my God!
Chandler: Your parents caught Ross smoking pot in college and he blamed it on me!
Chandler: I can save you time ladies, Im right here.
Chandler: (entering, with Phoebes book.) Here you go Phoebe! Here you go Phobo! Phewbedo! Phaybobo.
Chandler: What? Thats terrible!
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers apartment, Chandler is there. Phoebe and Rachel enter.]
Chandler: Oh well, that makes it not terrible.
Phoebe: Yeah, Chandler why dont you take a walk? This doesnt concern you.
Chandler: No not okay, you cant look for Monicas presents!
Chandler: Why?
Chandler: No, I have a great idea for a present for her.
Phoebe: Oh, thats it? (Mimics Chandler) A great idea!
Rachel: Chandler, arent you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas?
Chandler: No, you dont have to, and you cant because I live here too.
Chandler: What?
[Scene: A Little White Chapel, Chandler and Monica are entering.]
Rachel: (Reading) Dear losers, do you really think Id hide presents under the couch? P.S. Chandler, I knew theyd break you.
Chandler: Yknow when you guys said you were gonna go across the hall and look, you dont, you dont do that every year do you?
Chandler: If I help, we can find em faster!
Chandler: I couldn't find anything at Joey--Hey-hey, oh hey!
Chandler: Those are my gifts, I got them for you.
Chandler: Make sure you put all that stuff back in the closet, okay?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment, Phoebe and Rachel are there and Chandler enters.]
Phoebe: Ohhh. Thanks Chandler they're great!
Doug: Ha! (goes to smack him on the butt, but stops, faking Chandler out) Ahhhhhhh!
Chandler: Who did you originally want to hook up with?
Chandler: Hmm, lets see if it comes up this time. (He looks at his cards and shrugs.)
Chandler: Those are book ends! That's a great gift!
Chandler: Okay, give me a chance to win my money back. Okay? Sudden death, one goal, $1,000.
Chandler: Oh, yeah! Absolutely! Anything you need man! But you have to promise me the second you are feeling better so that we can make fun of your hair!
Chandler: Yes, I-I know that you do, but I think one of the reasons people were complaining though, was that they paid to hear the actor sing Old Man River.
Chandler: Oh, hey guys!
Chandler: All right, y'know what, we've been talking about London too much haven't we?
Chandler: Youre arranging flowers! (Pointing to the dish on the table.) You got dead flowers! You got a picture, a picture, of a baby dressed like flowers! This is not Joey!!
Chandler: Oh, the duck seems to think that Monica got me garbage! Hmm, I wonder what I could get Monica thats as good as garbage?
Chandler: What?
Chandler: Oh great!
Chandler: Okay! Okay! Okay!
Phoebe: Oh, this ones for Chandler. Here.
Chandler: Wait, we cant do this.
Chandler: I dont wanna know what Monica got me. Yknow? I mean, look, Im sure she worked really hard at getting you a present, and wanting to surprise me, and you guys are gonna ruin that, and I, look we have to put these back, this is not what Christmas is about.
Chandler: Fine!
Chandler: Thats what you got me?
Chandler: Yes, if the presents are hidden south for the winter.
Chandler: I can't believe they are not here! I slave and I slave for what? They've ruined cranberry day!
Chandler: No, it's a book that's just a book, okay? It's an early edition of the Velveteen Rabbit. It was her favorite book as a kid. So, uh, just... let me know if she likes it, okay?