words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are showing off Ben to the gang.]
Carol: I guess so. (Carol starts to breast feed Ben.)
Ross: Carol?
Chandler: Carol? I was just wondering if Joey could ask you a question about breast-feeding?
Carol: Sure.
Carol: It did at first, but not anymore.
Carol: As much as he needs.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol is dropping Ben off for Ross to watch.]
Carol: Ok, and this is Funny Clown. Funny Clown is only for after his naps, not before his naps or he won't sleep.
Ross: Carol, we've been through this before, ok? We have a good time. We laugh, we play. It's like we're father and son.
Carol and Susan: Hey! (This wakes Chandler and Ross up)
Carol: How did we do?
Carol: Why'd you freak out?
Carol: My breast milk is gross?
Ross: No, no, Carol. There's nothing wrong with it. I just, I just don't think breast milk is for adults.
Carol: Ross, you're being silly. I've tried it, it's no big deal. Just taste it. (Holding out a bottle.)
Carol: All you need is a woman who likes men and you'll be set.
MONICA: Yes! Carol and Susan's caterer had a mountain bike accident this weekend, and she's in a full body cast.
[at Ross's. Carol and Susan are picking Ben up]
Ross: Uh-huh, Carol, so were we. All right, just-just imagine for a moment, Susan meets someone and-and they really hit it off. Yknow? Say-say theyre coming back from the theatre, and they-they stop at a pub for a couple of drinks, theyre laughing, yknow, someone innocently touches someone else Theres electricity, its new. Its exciting. Are you telling me there isnt even the slightest possibility of something happening?
CAROL: Mommy is so proud of you. Hi. Hi.
CAROL: It's us.
CAROL: What did he say?
CAROL: Hi.
CAROL: Tuesday.
CAROL: Hi.
CAROL: Hi.
CAROL: Hi.
CAROL and SUSAN: Hello.
CAROL: We've got a cab waiting downstairs.
Rachel: Uh, honey, yeah that was with Carol.
Carol: Oh, I love them. Each one's like a little party in my uterus.
CAROL: My parents called this afternoon to say they weren't coming.
[Monica pushes Ben down the aisle in a stroller. Susan is escorted by both her parents. Carol is escorted by Ross.]
Carol: G. I. Joe. G. I. Joe?!
Ross: Yeah, see Mon, listen, listen. When Carol and I broke up, I went through the same thing. And you know what I did?
Carol and Susan: (entering) Hey!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are dropping off Ben]
Carol: Oh please God, let there be a song.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are picking up Ben, while Monica is pouring chocolate syrup, lots of it, into her ice cream.]
CAROL: Think I better go before mommy starts weeping.
Ross: I have to go. Yeah, Carol should be home by now, soo...
Ross: (sets out a bunch of shot glasses and starts to poor himself a drink, many drinks) Im an idiot. I mean shoulda seen it, I mean Carol and Id be out and shed, shed see some beautiful woman, and, and shed be Ross y'know look at her, and Id think, God, my wife is cool!
Carol: Y'know what, I want to talk to you about this so much, but we should probably do it when we could really get into it, are you free for dinner tomorrow night?
Ross: Cause Carols a lesbian. (Phoebe is shocked) And, and Im not one. And apparently its not a mix and match situation.
Ross: (looking at the page) 717? (to Carol) Wheres 717? (He gets up to return the page, Carol starts to take the last of the food into the kitchen, but Ross grabs the last piece.) Hey, youve have more of these for Susan right?
Carol: Ben. Ben. Ben's good. How come you never mentioned Ben before?
Carol: Oh, great! Me too.
Carol: Hey, what are you doing here?
Carol: (answering the door) Hi!
Carol: Hes sleeping.
Carol: Sooo!! Anyway...
Carol: Oh God, Ross I am so sorry.
Carol: Its not that kind of anniversary.
[Scene: Carol and Susans, Ross is eating the dinner Carol made for Susan.]
Carol: Youre a genius, Ross.
Carol: (on phone) Phoebe hang on a second Ross wants to say something. (listens) What? (listens) (to Ross) You slept with someone else?!
Carol: You slept with another woman?
CAROL: Actually, he is getting closer on the talking thing. He can't quite say mama yet, but once he said yumen.
Phoebe: Yeah! Lets do that!! That-that sounds good. We should sit down and talk, just me, my lover Carol, and the Stings. Umm, how-how will I get in touch with them?
Carol: Ahh, nooo!!
[Scene: Carol and Susans, Carol is running to answer the door.]
Carol: Yeah, okay, bye. (closes the door, turns out the lights, and runs back to the bedroom)
Carol: Okay, bye!!
Carol: Okay, Ill pay you tomorrow. (pushes him out the door)
Carol: Ah, Susan will be so pleased.
Carol: (looking through the peephole) Ugh. (opening the door) Ross!
Carol: No. But its okay, Ill just put out pickles or something.
Chandler: What? There was ice there that night with Carol? Plastic seats? Four thousand angry Pittsburgh fans?
ROSS: Well, I just spoke to Carol. Ben's got the chicken pox.
Carol: He picked it out of the toy store himself, he loves it.
Carol: This doesn't have anything to do with the fact that he is being raised by two women, does it?
[Scene: Carol and Susans, Carol is setting a romantic dinner for Susan as there is a knock on the door.]
Carol: Umm, yeah, actually, Susans gonna be home any minute, its kinda an anniversary.
Carol: So, I got the results of the amnio today.
Carol: (straining) Not.... helping!
Carol: (screaming at Ross) Oh, what do you know? No one's going up to you and saying, "Hi, is that your nostril? Mind if we push this pot roast through it?"
Carol: (irked) Where have you been?
Carol: (knocking on the door) Ross!
Carol: Ohh, yknow, Susans gonna be shooting a commercial in London next week.
Emily: Thats Carol with your son!
Carol: Ooh, yeah! She said shes having sooo much fun with Emily.
Ross: How do you know? I mean we thought Carol was straight before I married her!
Carol: Yes!
Carol: Whats too much fun?
Carol: Hey, Ben! Hey!
Carol: Hey! Hows Ben?
Carol: Oh my God, you are so paranoid!
Carol: Maybe.
Ross: Look, this is just a little too familiar, okay? For like, for like six months before Carol and I spilt up, all I heard was: "My friend Susan is so smart. My friend Susan is so funny. My friend Susan is so great."
Ross: No, it's for when Carol goes into labor. She can get me wherever I am. I mean, all she has to do is to dial 55-JIMBO.
Phoebe: Wow, Carol really messed you up!
Carol: I was gonna say
Monica: Look, all were trying to say is, dont let what happened with Carol ruin what you got with Emily.
Ross: (To Carol) No tongue. (And gives her the thumbs up.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is complaining about Carol.]
Ross: Hi, um, Im err, (has to clear his throat) Im Ross Geller, and err ah... (pats Carols bulge) ..thats, thats my boy in there, and uh, (points) this is Carol Willick, and this... is Susan Bunch. Susan is um Carols, just, com... (embarrassment finally overwhelms the poor fellow, who becomes incoherent until) ..whos next?
Carol: (entering from the kitchen) Hey Ross!
Dr. Franzblau: It really was. There was this great little pastry shop right by my hotel. (Carol sits up in pain, Rachel and Dr. Franzblau casually lay her back down) There you go, dear.
Ross: Ill be right there. (He goes over and opens the door to Carol, Susan, and Ben.) (To Ben.) Hello! (To Carol.) Hello! (To Susan.) Hey. Uhh, Emily, this is Carol and Susan.
Carol: Ah yeah, but now its Susan and me in Mexico and the hostages coming home.
Ross: I bet if I talk to Carol and Susan I can convince them to move to London with Ben.
Carol: Whats not funny?
Carol: Oh I I think theyre funny.
Carol: What? (Goes and checks.)
Carol: I don't care. I am trying to get a person out of my body here, and you're not making it any easier.
Rachel: Or Carol! But theyre funny to kids and who is it hurting?!
[Scene: The Chinese Restaurant, Ross and Carol are talking. Kristin is not there.]
Carol: (yelling from the bathroom) Oh my God!
Ross: Hey, hello! mmwa! (kisses Carol) I brought all the books, and Monica sends her love, along with this lasagna.
Rachel: (to Ross) I can't believe you don't want to know. I mean, I couldn't not know, I mean, if, if the doctor knows, and Carol knows, and Susan knows....
Carol: (entering with Ben and Ross) Hey guys!
Carol: Guess what? Ben is going to be in a TV commercial!
Ross: If you have to call me name, I prefer "Ross the Divorcer". It's just cooler. Look, I know my marriage isn't exactly work out. But I love to be that committed to another person. And Carol had some good times before she became a lesbian... and once afterward. I'm sorry.
Carol: Y'know, I don't really know you well enough for you to do that.
Joey: I look more like him than you do! (He winks at Carol.)