words in movies
Teleplay by: Sherry Bilsing & Ellen Plummer Story by: Vanessa McCarthy Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Rachel: Look, yknow I know my lifes going pretty well, but I look around and I just see so many people whove accomplished so many other goals by the time theyre thirty.
(He starts the car and surprisingly in fires right up and comes to a nice idle. (Both can be rarities with British sports cars with their lovely Lucas ignition systems, which tend not to work especially in the rain.) Anyway, this being New York he is parallel parked on a street with the car in front of him only inches ahead of his bumper, likewise with the car behind him. Hes completely boxed in and cant move more than two inches. He tries to get out several times by bumping the bumpers of both cars to no avail.)
Monica: Nooo! (Giggles) Okay. (She tries to pull herself up by Rachel and Joeys doorknob, but the door opens and she almost falls into the their apartment. She manages to catch herself.) Whoa! (Stands up, unsteadily) Okay. See I was, I was a little nervous about turning (whispering) thirty. (Giggles.) So the bus boys took me out for some drinks. (Pause) I wanna puke on you later!
Rachel: As I was saying I should probably have the first of the three kids by the time Im 35 which gives me five years. I love this plan! I wanna marry this plan!
Rachel: No, so I dont have to get married until Im 33! Thats three years, thats three whole yearsOh, wait a minute though. Ill need a year and a half to plan the wedding, and Id like to know the guy for a year, year and a half before we get engaged Which means I need to meet the guy by the time Im thirty.
[Scene: Monicas birthday, Monica is now dressed and is being helped out by Chandler and Rachel.]
Phoebe: Plus, it totally ruined my schedule! I I havent done any of the things I wanted to do by the time I was 31!
Phoebe: No, I just feel like being by myself for a while. All right? Ill see you guys later. Thanks. (Gets up and exits.)
[Scene: Rosss birthday, night has fallen and Joey and Ross are walking by where his car is parked to find that both cars blocking him in have left.]
VAN DAMME: 'Cause Rachel told me uh, you were dying to have a threesome with me and uh, Drew Barrymore. By the way, Drew has some groundrules and...
CHANDLER: Na, forget it, it's probably stripped and sold for parts by now.
Originally written by Brown Mandell.
Transcribed by Marita Bakken
Monica: All right, we still have a minute and a half to go, and were down by two points. Two points.... (she gets interrupted by the guys, who are doing a slow-motion high five.) Phoebe you do a button-hook again. Rachel, you go long.
[Scene: Caesar's Palace Casino, Chandler is looking for Monica while Tom Jones's signature song is playing in the background (Getting the theme yet? Tom Jones, Wayne Newton, casinos They're in Vegas people! Catch up!) It's Not Unusual, y'know, "It's not unusual to be loved by anyone! It's not unusual to have fun with anyone! But when I see you hanging about with anyone, it's not unusual to see me cry! I wanna die." Well, while that's playing he spots Monica playing craps and in victory hug the guy next to her. Chandler turns and walks out.]
MR. DOUGLAS: Have the final numbers on my desk by Tuesday.
Drew: Hold on, yknow I just got a box of Cubans, maybe I bring them by your office around uh, five?
PHOEBE: I, I don't wanna meet my father over the phone. What am I gonna say, like 'Hi, I'm Phoebe, the daughter you abandoned. Oh, by the way, I broke your dog.'
[Monica pushes Ben down the aisle in a stroller. Susan is escorted by both her parents. Carol is escorted by Ross.]
Written by: Michael Curtis and Gregory S. Malins Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
ROSS: (using calculator) Plus tip, divided by six. Ok, everyone owes 28 bucks.
Rachel: Yeah, which, by the way Chandler, I would like back one of these days.
RICHARD: Hey, you're gettin' better. I'm gonna keep this by the way.
Rachel: Come on. (they start to leave) Oh! And, uh, by the way....
Written by: Alexa Junge Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Joey: No room? Its a baby. Its like this big. (Holds his hands about a foot apart.) Yknow, I mean you-you could you could put it over here. (A desk.) Or-or-or we could put it right here. (The chair.) Aw, its cute, right? Or-or we could put it over here. (By the bathroom door.) You wouldnt even notice it. Wheres the baby? (Mumbles that its over in the corner.)
Carol: This doesn't have anything to do with the fact that he is being raised by two women, does it?
(She hangs up, closes her phone, turns around and puts it in her bag which is in the back of the car. While doing this and not looking at the road, she turns the steering wheel by accident, which makes the car swerve.)
Rachel: He's soo lucky, if Janice were a guy, she'd be sleeping with somebody else by now.
(Everyone looks at him. He realizes he just spilled the beans about Ross's crush on Rachel. You can hear this entire classic scene by clicking here.)
Written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Ross: I have to go. Yeah, Carol should be home by now, soo...
Written by: Wil Calhoun Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Chandler: (running around the apartment pointing out things) Bedroom. Bathroom. Living room. This right here is the kitchen, and thanks for coming by, (opens door) Bye-bye.
Chandler: Well okay Jerry, thanks for stopping by.
Written by: Seth Kurland Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Joey: Well, I guess he says that because they were on a break when it happened, that she should of forgiven him by now.
Rachel: Oh Daddy, no he didnt mean anything by that, he really didnt.
Phoebe: Oh, its the compulsively neat one by the window, okay.
(Chandler walks by and Joey lets out an evil "muhahaho".)
(An embarrassed silence... finally broken by)
Written by: Brian Boyle Transcribed by: Samantha Stein
Monica: Its okay. I suppose it could happen to anyone, not anyone I know, but... By the way I can still see it.
(Monica throws the ball over Joeys head, its stopped from rolling away by a very beautiful woman.)
Chandler: Is everybody else seeing a troll doll nailed to a two by four?
Ross: Ow! Ow! Okay, okay, fine, fine! All right, you wanna win by cheating, go ahead, all right. Phoebe the touchdown does count, you win.
Ross: What?! The guys against the girls? See, thats ridiculous Monica, because Im only down by three touchdowns.
Margha: Well, if I had to chose right now, which by the way I find really weird, I would have to say, Chandler.
Joey: This sucks, I was just up by that much!
[Scene: Healing Hands Inc. (Phoebes work), Frank is being ushered in, by the arm, to the room Phoebe is in by another girl.]
Phoebe: Okay. (One of Joeys co-workers, walks by with a dead tree.) Yikes! That one doesnt look very fulfilled.
Monica: To score the winning touchdown, by the way.
Rachel: (grabs Chandler by the shirt) All right, listen, smirky. If it wasn't for you and your stupid balloon, I would be on a plane watching a woman do this (makes a gesture like a stewardess pointing out exits) right now. But I'm not.
Gunther: Do you remember when you first came here, how you spent two weeks getting trained by another waitress?
Written by: Ira Ungerleider Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Written by: Alexa Junge Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
ROSS: Well I guess you can start by drivin a cab on Another World.
(They all make happy faces as they are unable to express their feelings verbally. Finally, the phone rings and the race to answer it is won by Monica.)
Rachel: Hi! Uhh, do you guys have plans for the weekend? Because I have my sister on hold, and she said that we could use her cabin for the weekend and go skiing. Huh? Im asking you first, right?!. I mean Im playing by the rules.
Chandler: Well, she spent the last six months getting over him, and now shes celebrating that by going on a date with him.
[Scene: Rosss, the gang, minus Rachel of course, is there. Chandler is forced to smoke by an open window.]
Chandler: Can somebody else hug him? I have to stay by the window.
Joey: Thanks for stopping by. See ya! (Throws them out and closes the door.) (To Cecilia) I-I am so sorry. I
Rachel: (to Ross): So basically, you get your ya-yas by taking money from all of your friends.
Written by: Wil Calhoun Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Written by: Adam Chase Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
(Robert leans back on the arm of the chair and allows Chandler to see up his shorts and sees little Robert. Chandler is horrified by this view.)
Written by: Michael Borkow Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Written by: Doty Abrams Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Phoebe: Okay, well Ill bring them by tomorrow morning. Okay, and uh, by the way, theyre not actually puppies, theyre Frank and Alices triplets. Okay, see ya! (Exits.)
Teleplay by: Brian Boyle Story by: Sherry Bilsing & Ellen Plummer Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Joey: Oh, hey, Chandler, we, ah, we stopped by the coffee shop and ran into Ross.
Written by: Michael Borkow Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Monica: Yeah, you really shouldn't. (to Ross, sarcastically) By the way, how was that year-long dig in Cairo?
Phoebe: Okay, well if I was in this for the money, Id be a millionaire by now, y'know. You just got to get out of that jingle head sweetie.
Written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Originally written by Betsy Borns Transcribed by Mindy Mattingly Phillips [mmatting@indiana.edu] Minor additions and adjustments by Dan Silverstein.
(Ross turns around and sees Rachel sitting by the window. She is just glaring at him.)
Monica: Who? I mean have you seen a car come by here in the last hour and a half? I think we should call Ross, maybe he can get a car and come pick us up.
Joey: Okay, some tricks of the trade. Now, Ive never been able to cry as an actor, so if Im in a scene where I have to cry, I cut a hole in my pocket, take a pair of tweezers, and just start pulling. Or ah, or, lets say I wanna convey that Ive just done something evil. That would be the basic I have a fishhook in my eyebrow and I like it (Does it by raising one eyebrow, and showing off the pretend fishhook.) Okay, lets say Ive just gotten bad news, well all I do there is try and divide 232 by 13. (looks all confused) And thats how its done. Great soap opera acting tonight everybody, class dismissed.
(Ross goes into the room where Dr. Green is laying unconscious. He turns on the TV, puts his feet on the bed and starts watching a dinosaur movie where the dinosaur is caught by two cowboys. Dr. Geller awakes.)
Frank: Yeah, so we just thought wed stop by and let you know theres still no pressure.
Ross: Okay here, have one of these peppers. Oh ha Oh God! So so hot! (Rubs his eyes.) Oh my(Laughs.) By the way, you dont want to touch the pepper and then touch your eye.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are being lectured by Phoebe.]
Written by: Seth Kurland Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Chandler: This ice cream tastes like crap by the way.
JOEY: Wow, look at that. The car is on fire, yet somehow it's expensive paint job is protected by the Miracle Wax.
Monica: By the way, Ross dropped by a box of your stuff.
Pete: (to Monica, by the door) So ah, we on for tomorrow?
Joey: Dr. Drake Remoray. Days of Our Lives. Voted most datable neurosurgeon by Teen Beat.
Phoebe: Well, it's this guy I used to massage. And by massage, I mean hold down so he wouldn't turn over and flash me.
Chandler: (tongue-tied) Uhl..ell. By the way, in case you missed that, that sound was, "Uhl, ell."
Written by: Wil Calhoun Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Written by: Jill Condon & Amy Toomin Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Phoebe: (laughing and banging her spoon on the table) Knock, knock, knock, knock, hi. Um, could you please tell Sergei that um, I was fascinated by what Boutros Boutros Gali said in the New York Times.
Video:April Twelve, Eighteen hundred, Sixty-One (Monica lights Richard's cigar butt), 4:30 A.M. on Tuesday, the United States garrison at Fort Sumter was fired upon (knock on door) it is now under bombardment by....
Joanna: Oh God, we just clicked! Yknow how people just click? Like he came by to pick me up, and I opened the door, and it was just like, click! Did he tell you?
Mona: Hey, I went by the photo shop, take a look, here is a mockup of our card. What do you think?
Eric: Oh, yeah, during the summer, I spend most weekends at my sisters beach house, which you are welcome to use by the way. Although, I should probably tell you, shes a porn star. (Chandler breaks his pencil in half)
Written by: Michael Curtis and Gregory S. Malins Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Rachel: O-kay!! See what you did, Im gonna be doing it by myself now. Okay?
Monica: Does it have to do with-with Chandler and that sock that he keeps by his bed?
Aired: 3/13/2003 Teleplay by: Brian Buckner & Sebastian Jones Story by: Robert Carlock Directed by: Gary Halvorson Transcribed by: Eleonora, Pheeboh and Vanessa
Written by: Scott Silveri & Shana Goldberg-Meehan Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Kate: By the way, he dumped me tonight after he read my review.
Emily: Oh, no-no-no, thats not rude! Its perfectly in keeping with a trip that Ive already been run down by one of your wiener carts, and been strip-searched at John F. Kennedy Airport, apparently to you people, I look like someone whos got a balloon full of cocaine stuffed up their bum.
(He starts to exit, but Chandler tries to stop him by climbing on his back and grabbing hold of the foosball table.)
(Joey wants to know, but Chandler doesnt want to discuss it by the chick, so he and Joey move over to the windows and away from the chick.)
Ross: (entering) Well hey! Whats going on? Ooh, cool boat(Sees why the boats there)Oh, no. (Averts his eyes by looking around the room) (To Rachel) Hey, did you, did you tell them?