words in movies
Ross: Uh-uhWow! Uh, I thought you guys were just like making jokes, I had no idea. What you know what? You guys are wrong. Uh yes, there is a chronological age difference but I never notice it. You know why? Because she is very mature. Besides, it doesnt really matter to me what you guys think. I mean, Im the one dating Elizabeth, not you!
{Transcribers Note: Elizabeth has two friends in the room with her who are named in the credits, but not in this scene. So Im just gonna guess since it doesnt matter one way or the other. (The last part is to discourage e-mails, who cares if I got it right or not?)}
(They start lobbing the balloons in. Ross desperately tries to get out of the line of fire but is struck in the back. The girls all retreat to relative safety behind the couch.)
Chandler: Oh, yeah. (Starts to take it off and then realizes) Uh, no you cant have my jacket! Because then I would be cold! If you thought that you were going to be cold, you shouldve brought your own jacket. But uh, other than that, are you okay? Are you okay?
Chandler: (not knowing the true meaning of her exclamation) I know, but just let me say it.
Ross: Yeah, I was but uh, she was a little busy with a water balloon fight.
Phoebe: Oh, en chante. (She holds out her hand for him to kiss it, but he only shakes it.)
Rachel: But Joey you dont have $20,000!
Chandler: Im gonna do it tomorrow yknow, and-and surprise her, but now youve ruined it!
Richard: Well yeah, Im sorry. I know this is the wrong time and the wrong place but I had to tell ya! I wanna spend my life with you. I wanna marry you. I wanna have kids with you.
Richard: I know this is crazy but am I too late?
Monica: Ohhh! What are you doing to me?! Oh look, I-I Im sorry but umm, this-this-this-this is not going to happen.
Richard: Okay thats fine, Ill walk away. And Ill never bother you again, but only if you tell me Chandlers willing to give you everything I am.
Rachel: (staring at him) Whno, but yknow who did stop in here looking for ya, Tennille.
Monica: Yeah, but thats pigs not people!
Chandler: If marriage worked, Id be all for it. But do you know what the divorce rate in this country is? 97%.
Chandler: Well, never say never but yknow probably uh yeah, never.
Phoebe: Yep, we shook on it. Yeah but believe me that is not how he wanted to seal the deal.
Ross: Oh, thanks. Yeah, I really thought wed be able to make it work, but uh, I guess it just wasnt meant to be.
Monica: Yeah but it was because I-I had an eye exam and I dont like my new eye doctor.
Monica: But getting over was the hardest thing that Ive ever had to do. And I never let myself think about you.
Phoebe: All right well lets see, Ross is a good father, but Joey has a boatThis is hard!
Monica: Nothing. (She backs away a little bit but is still in his arms and looks up at his eyes.) I dont knUmm. I dont know. Umm
Richard: Okay, she was here, but she left.
Chandler: But I am willing to offer her all those things. This was just a plan, yknow? A way to throw her off course so that when I offered her all these things, shed be surprised!
(Chandler gets up and runs out, but as soon as the door closes behind him he opens it, runs back in, picks up his ring Richard is holding up for him, and runs back out.)
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler is running up the stairs and towards his apartment, but Joey is taking out the garbage at the same time and stops him in the hall.]
Joey: I-I did! I told her everything, Chandler! But she wouldnt believe me.
Joey: To her parents I think and she said you shouldnt call her. But if I were you I would.
CHANDLER: OK, but uh, I hope you realize this means we're gonna miss hearing about the specials.
Joey: I am so-so-so sorry. I was gonna do it! Really! But I was standing there with 327 dollars in one hand and 238 dollars in the other hand, and I was thinking, "Wow! Its been a long time since I had (tries to do the math in his head, but cant) 327 + 238 dollars!"
ROSS: Ahh, oh that's OK, I mean, he's probably got, you know, parties to go to and stuff. But, ya know, he's moved on. Hey, that, that's the way it goes right.
MONICA: But no. Maybe if I were baking.
Ross: Okay, but do you really need another friend? I mean...
SUSIE: Ooh. Ooh. But ya know what would be even sexier?
GAIL: I, I really have to be somewhere but it was nice meeting you.
ROSS: I'm Ross Geller. Wha, I'm, God in your add you said you were pretty but wow.
JOEY: Hold it hold it. I gotta side with Chandler on this one. When I first moved to the city, I went out a couple of times with this girl, really hot, great kisser, but she had the biggest Adam's apple. It made me nuts.
ROSS: But, you are.
ROSS: Well, but, but. . .
ROSS: No, but. . .
RACHEL: NO but Ross. We are never gonna happen, OK. Accept that.
RACH: [near tears] No, you don't, Ross. Imagine the worst things you think about yourself. Now, how would you feel if the one person that you trusted the most in the world not only thinks them too, but actually uses them as reasons not to be with you.
MONICA: No, but that's probably 'cause I haven't asked them yet.
MONICA: Um, yeah, so uh, uhh, listen, I'm sorry I didn't tell you this before but umm, I, I'm no longer at my job, I, I had to leave it.
PHOEBE: Yeah, it's just so strange. I mean, she probably woke up today and thought, "ok, I'll have some breakfast, and then I'll take a little walk, and then I'll have my massage." Little did she know God was thinking, "Ok, but that's it." Oh, but the weirdest thing was, ok, I was cleansing her aura when she died, and when the spirit left her body, I don't think it went very far.
CHAN: Alright, OK, alright. But if we put on spandex and my boobs are bigger than yours, I'm goin' home.
Joey: This is so unfair! The one thing I wanted to do was throw my best friend a bachelor party, but no, I wasnt allowed to. All I got was a stupid steak dinner!
Joey: Yeah, but it's not gonna last. She's too much for me in bed. Sexually.
CHANDLER: Alright, alright, but you better be wearing clothes when I open my eyes.
MONICA: Yes but my mom got me this job.
Monica: (as Rachel) Yeah... (joining the others) ..see, I was supposed to get married, but, um, I left the guy at the altar.
RACHEL: Yes, but you can not tell Ross 'cause I want to surprise him.
JOEY: Hey, why can't we use the same toothbrush, but we can use the same soap?
Joey: All right, all right, all right. (Starts to leave, stops, and turns around) I mean Ill have to check with him first, but Ill think hell be cool with it. (Monica shoos him out.)
RACHEL: But I do not want to have everything decided for me. I spent my whole life like that. It's what I had with Barry, that was one of the reasons I left. I, I like not knowing right now and I'm sorry if that scares you but if you want to be with me you are gonna have to deal with that.
ROSS: Well it's really. . . sexy. I wouldn't have thought it would be but. . . wow.
RACHEL: Maybe. But just a little one. Phoebe got the whole world.
PHOEBE: I know you're just moving uptown but I'm really gonna miss you.
PHOEBE: It's not even that. I used to do my songs because it made me happy, but now it's like, it's just all about the money.
JOEY: Thanks, yeah. I love this but ya know what, it makes me wanna pee.
PHOE: But you guys came so close.
MONICA: But I thought you wanted to live by yourself.
JOEY: I did. I thought it'd be great. I figured I'd have like, time alone with my thoughts but, ya know, it turns out I don't have as many thoughts as you'd think.
CHANDLER: But we had one of the greatest talks we ever had last night. I mean it was, it was like when we first started living together.
CHANDLER: But...
ROSS: Look, I know you don't want to hear this right now but, we've seen him in his new place, alright. And he's happy, he's, he's decorated.
PHOEBE: Oh OK. So, um, the cat stinks but you love it, let's go.
Phoebe: Okay, you guys. You guys I think I know whats going on here. Okay, you guys STOP!! (They stop.) I know that, I know that youre acting mad because you think that itll make it easier to leave. But deep down youre still really sad. Deep-deep down.
CHANDLER: Well I do, but uh, Eddie makes them this way and, well they're pretty darn good.
Rachel: Yeah. Your teeth? Yes, I saw them from outside. (Sitting down on the couch.) You guys are never going to believe this. But, Phoebe made out with Ralph Lauren.
CHANDLER: Yeah, but uh, it was 1982 and my flock of seagulls haircut was tickling her chin.
PHOEBE: The voice woman. Ya know, I mean, she has a great voice but she doesn't have a video.
MONICA: Alright, I'll give you the ear thing but don't you think the ending was pretty wonderful?
RACHEL: OK, Phoebs. But what about you?
Ms. McKenna: The numbers we are seeing New York, Chicago, and London are consistently solid, but many of our officers have reported disappointing fields.
Chandler: I think she looks cute. (Rachel turns around and stares at him angrily) ... but I am wrong!
DR. REMORE: I know you do but you and I can never be together that way.
Joey: Oh yes I do. Otherwise whats next? Today Im just a guy who cant finish a turkey, but tomorrow Im the guy who eats half a Powerbar, wraps up the rest, and puts in the fridge? No! No, I just I justI gotta change my pants. (Gets up and heads for the door.) Jeans have no give. (Exits.)
RACH: Ummmm.... well, actually I'm already done, but I...I kinda got plans.
[Joey's place. He's watching Baywatch, lauging. He goes to say something to Chandler in the other chair but no one's there. He goes to call Chandler but decides not to.]
Ross: Maybe it was both of us, but we had our best friend's interest (Pauses and looks at Joey.) But we had our best friend's interest at heart.
JOEY: Uh, well, kinda yeah. Like, remember last week when Alex was in the accident? Well the line in the script was, 'If we don't get this woman to a hospital, she's going to die.' But I made it, ' If this woman doesn't get to a hospital, she's not gonna live.'
Chandler: I see, but once you get your first paycheck you'll be springing a big hotel suite, right? I mean, lead in a movie, they must be paying you a lot?
RICHARD: But... he gets it back, pass to the middle, lines it up and... BAM! Yes! Could that shot BE any prettier?
Monica: Im in love too! But in an orderly fashion.
MONICA: But you've only slept with two people.
[they pull out the box of condoms but there's only one left]
Ross: Yeah, um, I don't know if you noticed, but he had a lot to drink, and you know how he gets when he's drun..uh... (He has caught sight of Joey scowling at him) I can't do this, I did it, it was me, I'm sorry, I kissed your mom.
JOEY: Huh? Never really thought about the writers. The scripts just kinda come to my house. But you know what? This makes me look good, which makes the show look good, which makes the writers look good so how could they be mad about that?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. All but Joey are present.]
PHOEBE: But Joey, you're gonna be fine. You don't need that show, it was just a dumb soap opera.
MONICA: [enters] Honey. Uh, not to sound too Florence Henderson but, dinner's on the table.
Phoebe: Yeah! And until then you are going to sing to me because the radios broken and you are selfish but have a nice voice.
ROSS: I, I don't know, it's got all this stuff about wind and trees and there's some kind of sacred pool in it. I mean, I don't really get it but she's, she's pretty upset about it.
Monica: No! But, Im throwing this shirt away! I think there was a little misunderstanding before.
JOEY: Ah, it's career stuff. I don't know if you heard but they killed off my character on the show.
JOEY: But this is a two line part, it's like takin' a step backwards. I'm not gonna do this.
MR. GELLER: I may not know any of your flash dances but I'm no slouch on the dance floor.
Phoebe: Theres a reset button?! Ugh, thank you! Thank you! (He exits and she goes to shut it off.) Theres a reset button! My God! Why didnt I see that! (She takes off the plastic cover and looks for the button.) Reset button, reset button, where is there a reset button? (Finds it.) Oh here it is! (Picks it up off of the floor.) Oh! (She presses it hard, but of course it would help if the button was still attached to the detector. In frustration she presses it so hard it causes pain in her thumb.) Ohh, God!
MONICA: Yes. But all the other ones.
JOEY: Well, I had a whole ceramic zoo thing goin' over there but now, without the other ones, it just looks tacky.
ROSS: Yeah but Phoebs, what about the end?
PHOEBE: I don't think it would have sold a million copies but it would have made a nice gift for you.
CHANDLER: Well, it'll probably slow it down at first but, once I get used to the extra weight, I'll be back on track.
MONICA: MEG was good for me but I dumped her. Ya know, my motto is get out before they go down.
FRANK: No but he didn't really talk about anything.
Ross: Oh, we were helping Chandler write his vows, but he kicked us out because Joey kept making inappropriate suggestions.
ROSS: Oh, great. Great. There was a projectile, uh, throwing up incident, but he started it.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is watching TV, but turns it off, and Rachel is sleeping on the couch. Ross puts a blanket over her.]
MONICA: No no, the father can, but um, since I am the roommate I can tell you that she's not here and I'll pass along the message, ok. So bye-bye.
MRS. GREENE: ...I may have only been in therapy for three weeks now dear but...
Monica: Look, I know that you're in a place right now where you really need to hate Julie's guts, but she didn't do anything wrong. I mean, she was just a girl who met a guy, and now they go out. I really think that if you gave her a chance, you'd like her. Would you just give that a chance, for me?
JOEY: Look, it's a nice gesture, it is. But it just feels like--
CHANDLER: Yeah, but I'm, I'm so much faster...
JOEY: But wait, wait, wait. Then, after I left her office, she caught up with me at the elevator and offered me an even bigger part.
Dr. Franzblau: I don't know, could be an hour, could be three, but relax, she's doing great. So, uh, tell me, are you currently involved with anyone?
JOEY: But don't you need experience for a job like that?
JOEY: Yeah, but after Denise DeMarco, I had to promote it.
ROSS: You know, I might have expected this of you Phoebe, but Ryan, you're a military man.
PHOEBE: Just, you know, long time ago. Well, when men used to tell women what to do - a lot. And then there was suffrage, which is a good thing but is sounds horrible. Do you want to get this tattoo?
CHANDLER: Alright, ok, alright. So I can't fire Joseph but uh, I can sleep with his wife.
Chandler: Nobody is opening anything ok? Look, I dont know about you guys, but I wanna see the look on Monicas face when I give her my present, and Im sure she wants to see the look on my face when I get mine. So please, please, can we just, can we put them back?
RYAN: I'm sorry, but I can't say.
(Chandler starts to leave ashamed of himself, but Rachel stops him in the hallway.)
RACHEL: Daddy, daddy, you know what, I really wanna hear more about this, I really do, but I just have, I just have to do a, some stuff.
MRS. GREENE: ...but when all is said and done, he still drinks out of the mugs.
Chandler: Yeah but when he proposed to me with the ring I got goose bumps.
RACHEL: Ok mom, you know what, fine, I'll make an appointment ok, but you know what, right now, I gotta go, I gotta go do a thing.