words in movies
Rachel: I mean, I'll fly back and forth, they'll fly you out... Anything we want.
Ross: Do you think if the Ralph Lauren people offered her her old job back, she would take it?
Ross: Uhm, well... I'm here to see if you'll give Rachel her job back.
Ross: Oh, no. At first I have to get you to agree. Then we'll see if she wants to come back.
Ross: You let Rachel come back, and it’s done.
Mr Zelner: Well, I guess having Rachel back wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.
Rachel: Oh, you’re not gonna believe what happened to me today! Ralph Lauren called, and gave me my job back!
Rachel: Yee. I mean, it was so weirdest thing. They fired me and then out of nowhere they just hire me back! I mean, that place must have been falling apart without me.
Rachel: When the Louis Vuitton people found out that Ralph Lauren wanted me back, the offered me more money! Isn’t that great?
Janice: Oh, we go way back. Before Monica made an honest man out of him, Chandler used to be my little love muffin! (does her irritating laugh). So? Are you guys thinking of getting this house too? Ooh! Are we gonna have a bidding war? I'd better warn you, I'm a toughie (playfully punches Chandler, who tries to get away from her)
Monica: Okay, but if we don't get this house, she's stil gonna show up wherever we go! I mean, at least if she's here, it eliminates the element of suprise. I mean, never again will you have to hear the three words that make your balls jump back up inside your body. (She shows this with her index finger, mimicking it pushing something up)
Ross: (enters) It's me. Ron. (Mr. Zellner looks annoyed) Look, I um, I now Rachel turned you down but I think there is a way you might be able to get her to come back.
Ross: Perhaps I can persuade you. What if you can give your son this (Takes a huge egg out of his back) genuine pterodactyl egg (whispers) replica.
[Scene: Joey's apartment. He walks in reading his mail, and plays back his messages on the answering machine]
Rachel: Yeah. It was the weirdest thing. Zelner called me and he said we'll do everything we can to get you back. And that I should thank some Ron... I don't even know what department that guy's in.
Rachel: Yeah, you know, was I looking forward to going to Paris? Sure. You know, was I excited about working in the fashion capital of the world? Ooh, absolutely... Oh...! Yeah, but you know, this is... it's fine. I'm fine going back to a job where I've pretty much gotten everything out of that I possibly can... (she sits down, and Ross who is stunned to hear all this follows her example)
Rachel: But I already told Zelner that I would come back...
Chandler: Joey? Got you a Joey Special, two pizzas! Joe? (The phone rings and he answers it) (On phone) Hello? (Takes the phone away from his mouth when he realizes what he just did and yells.) Damnit! (Back on phone.) Hello? (Listens.) No, Joeys not here right now, but I can take a message I think. (Listens) Hes still got a chance for the part?! Oh, thats great news! (Listens) Well no obviously not for the actor who was mauled by his dog. (Listens) Oh well, thats great. I will give Joey the message. Thank you! (Hangs up and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle.) Yes! (Reading what hes writing) Okay, Mac audition at 2:00. Allergy actor attacked. (Pause) By dog not flowers.
[Scene: The Street, Phoebe and Rachel are heading back from that Colonial flea market.]
Rachel: Joey, honey, I dont think youre supposed to go back there.
Joey: Well, I guess youre right. Maybe, maybe Ill take her down to the incinerator. Its gonna be so said, and kinda cool. (He goes to remove the back, but it doesnt come off. So he sits down in it, puts his feet up, stands up, and looks back at it.) Shes heeled!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is coming back from using the phone.]
Monica: (visibly upset) She picked Rachel. I mean, she tried to back out of it, but it was obvious. She picked Rachel.
Gunther: He can have his job back.
Rachel: Joey, you cant let him get away with that. Ya know what, Im not going to let him get away with that. Im going to say something to himNo, I really shouldnt say anythingNo, I should say something to him. (Goes to the counter) Gunther, I want you to give Joey his job back. That is really not fair that you have to fire him
Director: Alright were back! Ten seconds left here we go! Ten! Nine! Eight! Seven! (He continues to count as we hear Joey think)
Rachel: (gasps) Oh, he brought her back to his apartment.
(Chandler and Monica enter from their room and Joey quickly hides the bag of potato chips behind his back.)
Monica: What? We took a walk, nothing happened. I can back with nothing all over me.
Joey: All right well, Id better take that back.
Monica: (hands the tape back to Joey, but doesnt let him grab it) Yknow maybe a little bit!
Joey: (sitting at the kitchen table with his back to the TV) You sick bastards!
Chandler: Theres no back to this couch!
Rachel: Ross! I think she is trying to make something happen with you to get back at me!
Rachel: Ross, I am telling you that she is using you to get back at me!
Ross: Youre welcome. (Gently kicks her back.)
Joey: Wh? Monday, one day. Tuesday, two day. Wednesday, when huh what? Thurs(He gasps in horror.) Oh! (Runs out and Chandler just shakes his head. After a second Joey runs back in to grab a piece of pizza and runs back out.)
Rachel: But! Dont you have to give him his money back?
Ross: (putting the magazine back and holding the money for it) Okay.
Monica's Boyfriend: Yknow what honey? I got to get back to the hospital.
Gary Collins: Welcome back to our fall telethon. Now if you've been enjoying the performance of Cirque Du Soleil, (As he is speaking, Joey and the volunteer getting into a shoving match.) and you'd like to see more of the same kind of programming, it's very simple. All you have to do (Joey is knocked down.) is call in your pledge and at that time tell the operator, one of our volunteers, what kind of programming you'd like to (Just as the volunteer sits down, Joey pulls him to the ground.)
Rachel: Joey no, this is wrong! You have to take it back, okay? You dont want to win an award this way. Youre very talented. And someday youre gonna win one of these for real and that one is gonna mean something.
Joey: All righty, what do you say we head back to my place?
Joey: Thanks! (Looks at it.) Yeah, theres pulp in that. (Hands it back.)
Rachel: Oh Mon, listen I have to ask! Okay, Joey Tribbiani invited me back to his apartment, now does he do this with a lot of girls?
Joanna: Wait-wait-wait-wait! You can put your sad little muffin back in its drawer. If you must know the truth, I didnt want to lose a perfectly good assistant.
Guy All the Way in the Back: Yeah, I heard it.
Monica: Say it louder, I dont think the guy all the way in the back heard you!
Ross: (Stepping in between them.)Okay! Okay! Thats it!! Parents!! Parents!! Back away!! All right, this is our wedding day! From now on everyone gets along, and if I hear one more word. NO GRANDCHILDREN! (Pointing at his mother.) Thats right!!
Ross: Yknow, if, if this is too weird for you, we can still back out at (A knock on the door interrupts him.)
Rachel: Okay. (She climbs back onto the couch.)
Phoebe: I thought Id try to take a walk. Would you pour me some water? Ill be back soon.
[Cut back to her room, Joey and Ross are sitting there waiting for her.]
Phoebe: Surprise! Look whos back!
Phoebe: All better! Back to work! Except this clown from research told me I was fired. He should do his research, huh?
Woman: Wow! Well, welcome back!
Rachel: I cant let him go out that way, hes got a meeting. (To Ross) Youve got something here on your back.
Rachel: (reading) 'Gone for more jars. Back later. Monica Geller.'
Chandler: (sticking his head back in) What?
[Scene: A hospital hallway, Chandler is sitting on a gurney with his hands spread out behind his back. Then Monica comes and plops down on the gurney and one of his hands. Chandler immediately recoils in extreme pain.]
Carl: (sticking his head back in) Hey, uh can I get a little piece of that cake?
(The women all clap and start to leave as Ross comes up to the instructor. Apparently he was hiding in the back.)
Rachel: Fine! Im sorry for your loss! (Hands it back to her.)
Monica: (pulling Rachel back down) Yes, they can stay with us.
Chandler: You dont, like go into the back of my closet, and look under my gym bag or anything?
Monica: (pulling the plate back) Oh-ho! But not in here! Cant eat em in bed, remember? No crumbies!
Monica: No. If you thought this mess is going to bother me, you are wrong! All right, let's go Blinky! (She ushers Rachel out the door, but before the door fully closes she sticks her head back in.) Chandler!!!! (Chandler agrees to clean up the mess.)
[Cut back to Joey and Rachels apartment.]
[Cut back to Joey about to leave for his audition for Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.]
(They go inside and Ross closes the door. When he turns around Elizabeth walks up to him, pushes him back against the door, and starts kissing him.)
Phoebe: ...and then it goes back to the chorus... Smelly cat, Sme-lly ca-t / I-t's not your fau-lt. And that's the end of the song... I realise that you didn't ask to hear it, but uhm... no-one had spoken in seventeen minutes.
[Cut back to Central Perk.]
Phoebe: (To Ross) Hes holding us back.
[Cut back to the present.]
Rachel: Y'know I cant believe I even thought about getting back together again! We are so over!!
Joey: Wow! (Back to reading the scene.) Well then Ill just have to carry you.
RACHEL: You give me back my sweater or it's handbag marinara.
[Joey's place. He goes to say something to Chandler in the other chair but no one's there. He goes to call Chandler but decides not to and throws the phone back down.]
Chandler: (on phone) Hi! Im back. (Goes to hang up the phone.) Yeah, that sounds great. (Listens) Okay. Well, well do it then. (Listens) Okay, bye-bye. (He hangs up the phone and turns around to see Joey standing close to him and screams.)
[Cut back to the present, they are still in each others embrace.]
Chandler: (entering) Oh good, okay, I can't take it anymore. I can't take it anymore. So you win, okay? Here! (Hands him the 50 bucks he's about to owe him.) Pheebs? Flying a jet? Better make it a spaceship so that you can get back to your home planet! And Ross, phone call for you today, Tom Jones, he wants his pants back! And Hornswoggle? What are you dating a character from Fraggile Rock?! (He sits down and sighs in relief.)
Ross: Youre back.
Monica and Chandler: Three! (They lift up the covers and check each other out, then come back up with silly grins on their faces.)
Phoebe: (gasps) Ohh, okay maybe they put your picture back up they can put you next to Matt Lauer. Look at him, smiling at me. (Giggles) Yeah I know; wed be great together!
Monica: Okay, Rachel, do you have any idea how painful it is to tell someone that you love them and not have them say it back?
Monica: Im gonna go tell Joey that (laughs) that youre back. I was really worried about you. (Exits.)
Wayne: It can do this. (He moves C.H.E.E.S.E.s arm close to Joeys special area and he jumps back.)
Joey: Hey! So Im back.
Elizabeth: (laughs) Ill be back in ten minutes.
Paul: Ill be right back. (He goes to get the ice.)
Paul: Okay. Ill be right back. (Gets up and heads for the kitchen.)
Phoebe: Well, we were um, sorta invited to go skiing, y'know Rachels sisters cabin. (Chandler goes back to the window to smoke again.)
(Ross turns his back on Paul and makes a I hate that guy face. Paul does the same thing.)
(Joey and Ross enter causing Chandler to quickly hide the brochure behind his back.)
Joey: Yes, its in my In in my pocket. (Paul hasnt dropped him yet.) (Chandler starts to reach for his front pocket.) My back pocket! My back pocket!
Chandler: Okay look, don't...don't be mad okay? But after I unpacked the boxes I wanted to do something nice for you, so, I-I-I cleaned the apartment. So I moved everything around and then I forgot where it, where it went back and I'm sorry, I'm very sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Rachel: Hi. Im back.
Joey: Hey, yknow what? Ill come too. Im making money now; its about time I give something back.
Joey: All right, lets get me back up there! (Holds out his picture.)
Phoebe: Okay. There may be a way that we can get the other ring back. Cause I heard the guy tell the jeweler where he was going to propose. So maybe we can get him to trade rings or something.
Chandler: Look, uh, just come later, we'll get everything squared away and you can come back later.
Phoebe: Oh! Oop! (Hands him back the ring.)
Joey: Oh my God, youre back!
Chandler: Yeah, Ill sit down. (He slides back into his chair.)
Monica: YeahOh thats right. You, you always wanted me too. Hey, I see you got your mustache back.
Monica: Oh my God, Richard. (Yep, Richards back.)
Kristen: Oh okay. But yknow what? Be careful. Because a guy was helping me before had to leave because he hurt his back.
Ross: Okay, well here we are. Now were in a tough spot again, Rach. What do you want to do? How do you want to handle it? Huh? Do you wanna fight for us? Or, do you wanna bail? (sits down next to her) Look, I, (on the verge of tears) I did a terrible, stupid, stupid thing. Okay? And Im sorry, I wish I could take it back, but I cant. (We see Monica and Phoebe are almost in tears.) I just cant see us throwing away something we know is so damn good. Rachel, I love you so much.
Monica: Yknow youre really not supposed to be back here!
Joey: (all excited) The Mr. Bowmonts here!!! (Jumps over the back off the couch and runs out into the street.)
Monica: Ohh Oh, thats okay I hate when people come back to complement the chef. Like I have nothing better to do! So whats up?
Monica: Oh God (Starts looking around.) Why dont they put chairs back here?!
Monica: Fair? Please dont even talk to me about fair! Fair wouldve been you wanting to marry me back then! Or fair wouldve been Chandler wanting to marry me now! Believe me, nothing about this is fair! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!
Chandler: Well, she walked in when I was looking at the ring brochures. You can understand that, right? (Ross and Joey look at each other and go back to watching the game on TV.) Guys? Guys? (Walks in front of them again.)
Phoebe: Okay, this kind of back talk is not gonna fly when were married!
(Chandler gets up and runs out, but as soon as the door closes behind him he opens it, runs back in, picks up his ring Richard is holding up for him, and runs back out.)
(Ross starts to play. He plays a key that has a back beat sound attached to it. Over the background music he plays the sound of a barking dog, a mooing cow, a laser beam, someone coughing, a jackhammer, a doorbell, a police siren, a ray gun, breaking dishes, and for a closer he plays the sound of a loud crash. Basically, the music sucks.)