words in movies
(He goes over and sits down at the counter, all depressed.)
Chandler: (joining them) Okay, how'd it go at the doctor's?
Ross: At least they knew what yours was. Y'know, yours had a name.
[Scene: A Doctor's Office, Ross is having his thing looked at by Dr. Rhodes.]
[Scene: Dr. Rhodes's Office, a rather large group of doctors has now gathered to take a look at Ross's thing. Ross is none too pleased with the developments, he has a disgusted look on his face.]
Joey: Look at this! A millionaire's checkbook.
Joey: (looking at the checkbook) Wow! Look at this! He wrote a check for 50,000 dollars to Hugo Ligrens Ring Design. (Monica is stunned) Oh, sorry, what do you think the good news is?
(Joey laughs, Ross glares at him, and Joey stops.)
Rachel: OH MY GOD!!! (She holds her hands up in triumph and the gang all look at her.) Sorry, I was just imagining what itd be like to catch the money bouquet.
Rachel: (entering) Hi! Okay, dont be mad at me, but I couldnt resist.
Phoebe: (gasps) Oh, you so would! Oh, you should get that anyway. (They both look at her.) Like for clubbing.
(She goes in, and sees Jason without his shirt. It turns out that he has a great body too, and is at a loss for words.)
Guru Saj: Well, relax. If it makes you feel better, Ive attended some of the finest medical schools in Central America. Well then, lets take a look at this skin abnormality of yours. (motions to the table) Come on, have a seat. (looks at it) Eeh, huh. As I suspected, its a koondis!
Guru Saj: I dont know, whats a koondis with you? (starts laughing as if that joke was funny, Ross only looks at him, and he stops) Please, lie down! Ive got a sav that oughta shrink that right up.
Pete: Well ah, Ive been doing a lot of thinking, and I look at my life
Susan: Oh, look at that.
Rachel: Oh, I know. Look at him.
(Ross is practically drooling over Rachel at this point.)
Monica: Awww, look at Aunt Monica's little boy!
(Joey is looking at his check.)
Joey: Well... I'm helping out down at the N.Y.U. Med School with some... research.
Phoebe: Oh, well, see, there's this guy she met at the...
Phoebe: So you do know who he is! (laughs, Ross stares at her) Sorry.
Ross: At the coffeehouse, right.
Monica: You know, that guy she met at the coffeehouse.
Monica: I'm not going to be a part of this! You can't just bring some random guy at home and expect him to be our sperm donor!
Ross: Smooth man. Yeah, you got some chilie on your neck. (Chandler checks and runs into the bathroom.) Well, I just want to say, thanks everyone, this-this was great. And hey! See you guys Monday morning. (They museum geeks wave at him.) Thanks Joey.
Phoebe: Hi, Ben. I'm your father. I am... the head. Aaaaaahhhh.... (puts picture down, sees Ross staring at her) Alright, this barbecue is gonna be very fun.
MONICA: Alright, for the bizillionth time, yes I see other women in shower at the gym, and no I don't look.
Joey: Relax. You're only at nine centimeters. And the baby's at zero station.
Chandler: Look, Ross, you gotta understand, between us we haven't had a relationship that has lasted longer than a Mento. You, however have had the love of a woman for four years. Four years of closeness and sharing at the end of which she ripped your heart out, and that is why we don't do it! I don't think that was my point!
Monica: Behind my brother's back? (Rachel glares at her) ... is exactly the kind of crazy thing you won't be hearing from me.
Ross: 200 at least.
Rachel: At his apartment. Is this juice?
Chandler: At least as long as I have the pants.
Joey: That's how they do pants! First they go up one side, they move it over, then they go up the other side, they move it back, and then they do the rear. (Chandler and Ross stare at him) What? Ross, Ross, would you tell him? Isn't that how they measure pants?
Carol: I was looking at stuffed animals, and Susan wanted a Chunky.
Phoebe: Oh, look at these! Hey, Ben. Just do it. (Ben starts to cry) Oh my God, oh, ok, was that too much pressure for him?
Carol: It did at first, but not anymore.
Phoebe: Yes, and then I realized I'm against that, and uh, so then we bought some, (sees Monica pointing at her chest) uh, boobs.
Susan: Honey, relax. Ross is great with him. (Ross looks at her.) Don't look so surprised. I'm a lovely person.
Ross: (staring at Susan) You've tasted it? You've tasted it.
(They walk off into the sunset, at least a picture of one.)
Monica: Oh, that's Nana, right there in the middle. (Reads the back) 'Me and the gang at Java Joe's'.
PHOEBE: Just don't. Look at this funky shirt!
RACHEL: Monica, Monica, look at this lamp. Is this tacky or what? We have to have this.
Chandler: (sarcastic) Ooooh. (looks dumbfounded at Joey's stupidity)
Chandler: (To a woman who he has clearly just met) And then the peacock bit me. (Laughs) Please kiss me at midnight. (She leaves)
(At this point, Chandler walks into the living room from his bedroom. Ross and Joey both have their backs to him, so they don't notice. Chandler sees the situation and remains quiet, watching.)
Julie: Oh, listen you guys. I have this friend at Bloomingdale's who's quitting tomorrow and he wants to abuse his discount. So, anyone want to come with me and take advantage of it?
JOEY: Well, I don't know. I don't know what we're gonna be doin'. I mean, what if we're at her folks' place?
JANICE: Is it yours? Ha! You wish, Chandler Bing. You are looking at a married lady now.
Ross: (looking at them) Wh-what's going on?
Phoebe: You bought your sheets at a flea market? Ross come on, you gotta loosen the purse strings a little.
Janice: Hi! Hi sweetheart! This is my husband Sid, I dont think youve met him. Ross, Rachel, this is Sid. I nabbed him a year ago at the dermatologists office. Thank God for adult acne huh? (Does the laugh.)
MONICA: I can't believe that this whole time we thought he hated us. I mean, isn't it amazing how much you can touch someone's life, without even knowing it?...Would you look at this dump? He hated us. This is his final revenge!
RACHEL: [to Monica at the counter] Ooh, Julie's so smart, Julie's so special.
PHOEBE: Um, I'm gonna go meet Duncan, he's skating tonight at the Garden, he's in the Capades.
Ross: Exactly, itll be illegal for him to drink at his own bachelor party.
DUNCAN: Ahh, look at you, you look great.
Chandler: So, Ross and I are going to Disneyland and we stop at this restaurant for tacos. And when I say restaurant, I mean a guy, a hibachi, and the trunk of his car. So Ross has about 10 tacos. And anyway, were on Space Mountain and Ross starts to feel a little iffy.
Rachel: Well, Joey probably thinks Ill just embarrass him. Yknow, he thinks Im some kind of a soap opera nutWhich Im not! Im not. Although I do know that your uh, your favorite ice cream flavor is butter pecan. (Starts stroking his arm) And uh, and that your-your dogs name is Wally. Well look at that, Im just stroking your arm.
[Scene: At Chandler and Joey's. Ross and Chandler are there. Ross is watching wrestling.]
(At Monica and Rachel's)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment, Joey is trying to turn the sofabed back into a sofa. Someone knocks on the door and it rears up at him.]
JOEY: Yeah, someplace nice. (to Phoebe and Rachel) How much do you think I can get for my kidney? (at Central Perk)
PHOEBE: Wow, look at these prices.
CHANDLER: I'm hoping that when Bob doesn't show up, she will seek comfort in the open arms of the wry stranger at the next table.
Chandler: Oh, Satan's minions at work again...
(at Monica and Rachel's)
CHANDLER: Why did you look at me when you said that?
JADE: Hello, I'm looking for Bob. This is Jane. I don't know if you're still at this number, but I was just thinking about us, and how great it was, and, well, I know it's been three years, but, I was kinda hoping we could hook up again. I barely had t he nerve to make this call, so you know what I did?
(at Monica and Rachel's)
(at Central Perk)
(They all leave but Ross, but they all come back a few seconds later. They make faces at the baby.)
[Scene: At Monica and Rachel's.]
(At Somplace Nice)
JOEY: Hey, hey, look at that talent.
RACHEL: Whoa, look at you, you did pretty well.
Chandler: Man, if you tried something like that on my birthday, you'd be starin' at the business end of a hissy fit.
Joey: I'm telling ya... (his eyes open wide and he looks like his eyes are about to pop out. He stares at Ross like this without blinking) I can do it.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Everyone is sitting at the couches, Chandler enters.]
CHAN: OK, let's do it. [Monica looks at him funny] What?
RACH: Well. [looks at watch] Woah, look at that! I gotta go, I gotta date. With a man. Um, OK, you guys have a really, uh, have a really good night and you two have a, uh, have a, uh, really good cat. [she leaves carrying her tray then comes back in] OK, we're not supposed to take these when we leave.
Joey: C'mon, you guys, it wasn't that bad. It was better than that thing I did with the trolls, at least you got to see my head.
RACH: Well, at first it was really intense, you know. And then, oh, god, and then we just sort of sunk into it.
[Scene: The Restaurant, Joey, Lorraine, Chandler, and Janice are at the table. Joey and Lorraine are seated very close, Chandler and Janice have backed their chairs away from one another.]
MONICA: Look. [they look at Joey in the kitchen with a cigar in his mouth, looking at his reflection in a spatula] Joey, do you know we can see you from here?
[Cut to Joey hanging up the phone in Vegas. He's wearing a Roman gladiator's uniform and goes over to join a family to pose for a picture. You see, he's apparently taken a job at Caesar's Palace.]
[Ross and Rachel look at each other and then at Phoebe, realizing the song is about their situation.]
[Ross is at his apartment.]
ROSS: No, no, wait, ok, ok, look at the other side. Look at Julie's column.
[Ross approaches Rachel at counter.]
JOEY: [quietly] I never know how long you're supposed to wait in this type of a situation before you can talk again, you know? [Ross stares blankly at him] Maybe a little longer.
Ross: Looks like a fun gang. (They all look at each other and smile)
CHANDLER: Sure. (My god, that's a big head! It didn't look this big in the office. Maybe it's the lighting. My head must look like a golf ball at work. All right, don't get hung up on it, quick, quick, list five things you like about her: Nice smile, good dresser...Big head, big head, big head!)
Erica: I don't want to look at your file! This is over.
JOEY: Well she better get here soon, the outlet stores close at 7.
PHOEBE: You just abandoned your whole belief system. I mean, before, I didn't agree with you, but at least I respected you. How, how, how are you going to go into work tomorrow? How, how are you going to face the other science guys? How, how are you going to face yourself? Oh! That was fun. So who's hungry?
RACH: Joey, would you slow down? They're not gonna be sold out of papers at one o'clock in the morning.
[There's a bang at the door.]
[Scene: The ladies' bathroom at the restaurant, Monica and Angela are talking.]
[Scene: Chandler, Phoebe, Rachel, Monica comforting Joey at Monica and Rachel's apartment.]
RACH: Noooo, no, I'm not mad at him. I'm.. I'm not really anything at him anymore.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe and Ross are doing a crossword, Monica is cooking, and Chandler is still staring at his phone.]
[Everyone looks at each other in amazement.]
JOEY: What about Ross? I mean, are you still mad at him cause he made that list about you?
[ROss approaches Rachel at counter.]
MNCA: Ahhh, hey honey? Don't you have to be at your interview now?
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Rachel at counter, Phoebe, Chandler, and Fun Bobby at the couch.]
PHOE: [looks at Russ] Oh, yeah! No, no, no, no, oh, oh.
MNCA: Yes, I would like something. [looks at Fun Bobby, changes her mind] No, no thank you.
Amy: Oh! It's Ross... Hey Ross! (She says hey to the guy at the falafel stand, whose only similarity with Ross would be his black hair.) Hello-oo Ross! (to Rachel) He's rude!
[Scene: Ross, Phoebe, Rachel, and Chandler at Monica and Rachel's apartment.]
[Phoebe and Rachel are at the counter talking.]