words in movies
[Cut to Gary and Monica at the counter.]
Monica: He just told me at the counter. He made me promise not to tell, but I couldn't hold it in any longer!
Ross: (he catches the ball and pauses, staring at Joey in disbelief) Also an island.
Ross: (looks at his watch) 2:17.
Ross: Wow! We are pretty good at this! Hey! We totally forgot about lunch!
(Joey turns and looks at quite possibly one of the ugliest pets that you can possibly buy on the planet. Rachel has bought herself a hairless cat. Yep, a hairless cat! Joey and Ross start to get sick.)
Rachel: Ugh! Look you guys, I'm really excited about this! Okay? I don't care what you think! I'm gonna go set up a little litter box for Mrs. Whiskerson. (They both glare at her.) Well, what am I gonna call her? Fluffy?!
Ross: I know! (Looks at the ball in his hands.) Don't switch hands, okay?
Chandler: Hey ladies! What are you in here for? (Laughs at his joke.)
Rachel: You guys this cat is nothing like my grandmother's cat. I mean, it's not sweet, it's not cute, I even dragged that little string on the ground, and it just flipped out and scratched the hell out of me. And I swear, I know this sounds crazy, but every time this cat hisses at me I know it's saying, "Rachel!"
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Ross, and Monica are still playing catch, with Chandler looking on. Joey throws the ball to Monica who catches it and whips it at Ross.]
Monica: Look, if you want you can keep it at our place until you find out what to do with it.
Gary: Okay, I'll see you at the station later.
Gary: Nothing at all?
Phoebe: (looks at the paper) Are these for rent! I thought people were just bragging!
Gary: Let me tell you what I think might be going on. (Phoebe looks down in shame.) No-no-no, don't look at the table. Look at me. (Points to his eyes and she does so) Okay, I think somebody asked someone to move in with them. And I think someone said, "Yes" but now she's having doubts because things are moving to fast for someone. Does that sound at all possible to you?
Gary: Phoebe, it's okay that you feel this way. I mean it is soon. And there's a lot of things we don't know about each other, and I just figure that everything I really like. And the things I don't know, I get to learn about at someplace with both our names on the mailbox.
Phoebe: Oh wait, one sec. One sec. (Goes to the mirror) Hey you! Behind the glass! Who are you looking at! I've always wanted to say that when I was in one of these rooms, (sees the look on his face) which was never!
Rachel: Oh no! No! It's actuallyit's very sweet. It's very sweet. Look! (Goes to pet it and it hisses at her.) Yeah, do you want it?
Rachel: Well, I do, but you're just gonna have to actually look at this as more of an investment than a cat.
Rachel: (makes some unintelligible sound to stop her from leaving) Obviously you know how to haggle, so I'm not gonna try and take you on. Okay? So $800 and I don't call the cops because you're robbing me blind! Blind! (Covers her eyes) Just take cat, leave the money, and run away! Run away! (Uncovers her eyes and sees that the woman has fled) Damnit! (To the cat) Cat, can't you at least smile or something?! (The cat hisses at her again, it sounds like Rachel) Okay, did anybody just hear that? Anybody?
Monica: All right, there's some pizza at my place, we can all eat with one hand right? Are you with me?
Monica: All right! Let's go! (Runs to the door.) Let's go Team Monica! (The guys all stop and stare at her) All right, we can work out the name later.
[Cut to her apartment where Rachel is sitting at the table.]
Rachel: Phoebe! It's 6 o'clock in the morning! Why aren't you at Gary's?
Rachel: No, I meant with the dropper over here. (Points at Chandler.)
Chandler: Dont go! Im sorry. Im so sorry! (Sees another guy who is still asleep.) Look! This guy fell asleep! He fell asleep too! Be mad at him! (Looks at him more closely.) Or, call an ambulance.
[Ross enters behind Rachel, and look at each other for a moment.]
Ross: And tell them what? The naked guy we stare at all the time isnt moving.
[Cut to later, all except Chandler are staring out the window at Ugly Naked Guy.]
(Ross proceeds to apply copious amounts of the lotion on his legs. He literally starts spraying the back of his legs with the lotion, and as he applies some to his butt he makes a happy face like he enjoyed that sensation. After using about half the bottle he again tries to pull up his pants, but at the first sign of resistance, his hand slips off of the pants and hits him in the forehead.)
Chandler: Well now you have two. Hey, I am good at math.
Rachel: Oh, you guys are gonna have so much fun! She's at such a cute age. Oh, a couple things. Now that she's eating solid food, she poops around the clock. And watch out for your hair, 'cause she likes to grab it. And oh, she's also in this phase where if you leave the room, she screams bloody murder, but ah... Thanks, you guys. Have fun!
Rachel: All right, so are we not having dinner at all?
Chandler and Phoebe: ...in you, my endless (Phoebe goes high pitched, Chandler goes low pitched) love. (they both look at each other.) My endless love. (once again they dont match tones, and they just look at each other)
Joey: (looking at the timer) Thirty seconds left on the timer!
Rachel: Im sorry, they were just all coming at me, and I didnt know what to do.
Phoebe: Whoa!! He is soo unreasonable! God, although I think I understand what he means. Oh my God, this is like 60 Minutes, okay, when, when, at first youre really mad at that pharmaceutical company for making the drug and then y'know you just feel bad for the people because they needed to make their hair grow.
(they all start to dive for the ball and Monica and Ross grab it at the same time.)
Rachel: Come on, its a hypnosis tape. This woman at work used it for two weeks straight and she hasnt smoked since.
(Phoebe turns and looks at Monica, while Joey frantically motions to Chandler to help him out.)
Monica: So what, you're not the only one. I mean, half the time we don't know where we're going. You've just gotta figure at some point it's all gonna come together, and it's just gonna be... un-floopy.
Monica: (telling Chandler the seating arrangement) Okay so this is where the band is. (Points.) And this is where the bar is. (Points) And all these pins have peoples names on them. (She has pins to show the seating at each of the tables.) And Rach, here you are. (Points to Rachels place.)
Woman: I can dial 9-1-1 at the touch of a button, y'know. Now, go away!
Rachel: God, isn't this exciting? I earned this. I wiped tables for it, I steamed milk for it, and it was totally(opens envelope)not worth it. Who's FICA? Why's he getting all my money? I mean, what- Chandler, look at that.
RACHEL: Yeah, I mean, you know it, I mean, if it were me I, I, you know, I'd want you to, I don't know, like catch me off guard, you know, with like a really good kiss, you know really, sort of um, soft at first, then maybe um brush the hair away from my face, and look far into my eyes in a way that let's me know that something amazing is about to happen.
Joey: More embarrassing than shiny raspberry lip balm?! (Rachel just looks at him.) I didnt say raspberry before did I? All right just-just tell me Rach, just tell me!
Rachel: (sitting down next to Chandler) Im training to be better at a job that I hate, my life officially sucks.
Rachel: Cant I just look at the handles on them?
Chandler: (jumps back and points at the cigarette) Oh my God!
Monica: Well, it's the thought. Hey, doesn't Ross's flight get in in a couple hours? At gate 27-B?
Ross: I dont have too. I can just look at you.
Chandler: Y'know what Rach, maybe you should just, y'know stay here at the coffee house.
Ross: Oh, come here sweetie, listen, youre gonna go on like a thousand interviews before you get a job. (she glares at him) Thats not how that was supposed to come out.
Joey: Oh Monica, listen, I ah, I saw down at the hardware store, they got those designer tiles on sale. If you ever want to redo the bathroom floor.
Joey: Oh Monica. (goes over and hugs her, then looks at the form and stops hugging her.) Wow, this guy's an astronaut. That would've been cool, (sees Monica) for like a day. (hugs her again).
(Rachel and Joey both laugh at that suggestion.)
(We hear Phoebe knock at the door upstairs, and the guy answer it.)
Chandler: Hey-hey-hey Rachel, funny thing. Actually, the ah, end zone starts at that pole, so youre five feet short, so we win!
CHAN: I had about a mugful in this lovely 'I got boned at the Museum of Natural History' mug.
Rachel: (looks at Monica) (to him) Do you want my pickle?
(A guy at the end of the table starts laughing.)
Ross: Ah, somebodys at the door on the ceiling.
Rachel: Hi! So Im out having lunch at Monicas and this guy starts talking to me, and it turns out he works for a buyer at Bloomingdales and there happens to be an opening in his department. So I gave him my phone number and hes gonna call me this weekend to see if he can get me an interview!
[Sequence 3: Chandler is running with the ball, Phoebe flashes him again, but Chandler covers his eyes, and keeps running. He then runs into a tree at the end of the field.]
Grandma Tribbiani: (pointing at the screen) No! Sam Waterston!
Rachel: I cant! Its too late! Terry already hired that girl over there. (points to her) Look at her, shes even got waitress experience. Last night she was teaching everybody how to make napkin.... (starts to cry) swans.
Ross: Thats right good things, that-that is what I said. (glances at Monica)
Joey: Ms. Monroe (She slaps him) Oh there you go. (She storms off, leaving Joey standing next to Dina. They share a nod at the ferocity of the slap they just received.)
Chandler: Yeah, she was at Rockefeller Center skating with her husband, she looked so happy. I almost feel bad for whipping that kids pretzel at them.
Chandler: Youve got it. (he starts to look at his sisters, but he still doesnt know which one is Mary-Angela.)
Ross: (to Chandler) It's her first day at this new job. Your not supposed to start with her!
(Ursula points out a vacant table, so the twins walk over, side by side, to sit down. Departing customers walk right past the pair. Sitting at the back, a hungry gentleman looks most annoyed as Ursula sets his meal down in front of her. The girls sit.)
Phoebe: A stripper at a bachelor party, that is so clich�. Why don't you get a magician?!
RACHEL: Yes, but I, I think about who's apartment we're gonna sleep at tomorrow night and, and where we're gonna have dinner next Saturday night. I do not think about what our childrens' names are gonna be. You know what our childrens names are gonna be.
Phoebe: Well, can you dance at all?
Dr. Mitchell: Look at this, it's from the cellars of Ernest and Tova Borgnine, so how could we resist?
(Ross finally looks at the woman kissing Mark.)
Ross: What's going on?! (throws the love bug at him) That's what's going on!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Chandler and Phoebe are sitting at the couch. Ross is sitting at the table and answers the phone.]
Rachel: So ah, did you have fun at the bachelor party last night?
JOEY: Yeah, that makes sense. (looks at Ross)
Guy: Oh believe me, I-I-Ive been there. I had to sort mannequin heads at that Mannequins Plus.
Ross: Oh, just this woman that I met last night at the party.
Rachel: There was a woman at the... (realizes) The stripper?!
Quartet: (singing) Congratulations on your first week at your brand new job! It won't be long before your the boss.
(Monica waves at Julio.)
Richard: No its not too soon, I had lunch at a eleven.
Rachel: (looking at her watch) Oh my God, I gotta go to work!
Clerk: Eight oclock is the cut-off and, (looks at his watch) aww, its 8:02.
Ross: Well, I suppose we just try to not look directly at it.
Rachel: (to Ross) Yeah, right. Look at you, youre practically giddy.
(He puts his leg up on the table to pass Joey the cookies, and Phoebe sees what the guys are laughing at, and gasps.)
[Scene: Joey and Janines apartment, Chandler walks in. Joey and Janine are knitting at the kitchen counter.]
Chandler: Man, I gotta get a kid. (looks at the pen and starts laughing)
Joey: Oh, all blank, and no blank, makes blank a blank blank. Oh no-no-no, no, the end when Jack almost kills them all with that blank, but then at last second they get away. Aww!
Ross: Mon, look at yourself. You have cookie on your neck.
Monica: What are you smiling at?
Chandler: (sarcastically) Oh, come on tell me. I could use another reason why women won't look at me.
Ross: All right, look, look, youve got to do this yourself, okay in person. At least you know her name. You just go to the house and you ask for Mary-Angela, okay, when which ever one she is comes to the door, you take her for a walk, you let her down easy.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Look at you. All jealous.
Phoebe: (to Chandler) Why? Because she can sing and play guitar and do both at the same time?
Monica: Why? Do you think hes still mad at us?
Mr. Geller: Well you gotta get at it princess! When your mother and I were trying to conceive you, whenever she was ovulating, bam, we did it. Thats how I got my bad hip.
(Joey puts his finger over his mouth to tell Ross to keep quiet. Ginger looks at Monica who looks away and leave.)
(They all rush toward Rachel, who panics and runs away. She runs out of the park and up along the fence, she then comes back into the park and runs past Monica, as she gets to Monica, she throws the ball at Monica, and it hits her in the eye.)
Monica: No, umm, he met some girl at the coffee house.
Rachel: Yeah, at the lecture, I told you that last week, you said you didnt mind.
(The gang all looks at Phoebe.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is looking at her beeper still in the pot. She takes it out, shakes it, and puts it back in.]
Leslie: (singing) My best shoes, so good to me. I wear them everyday. Down at the heel, holes in the toes. Dont care what people say. My feets best friends, pals to the end. With them Im one hot chicky. Though late one night, not much light, I....
Chandler: Oh, yeah. I'd marry him just for his David Hasselhof impression alone. You know I'm gonna be doing that at parties, right? (Does the impression)
(They both start laughing. They look at each other, stop and step apart a little bit.)
Rachel: Oh, yeah, sure, sure, sure, sure. (points at Chandler, who holds up the cue ball as a Remember me? thing) Listen, can we please have lunch the next time Im in the city?
(Sergei goes up to her at her door and says something.)
Monica: Oh no, shes still at work, but she told me to tell you to call her.
Rachel: (answering her phone at work) Hello.
Chloe: Relax. Its just Issacs D.J.-ing at the Philly. You should come.
Ross: Dont yell at me okay, this is the most Ive seen you all week.
(Chandler and Joey stare at each other in shock.)
[Scene: The rest stop, the gang is still stuck, Chandler is kneeling at the rear bumper.]
JOEY: Listen, uh, I don't know when I'm gonna see you again. CHANDLER: Well, I'm guessing uh, tonight at the coffee house. JOEY: Right, yeah. OK. Um, take care. CHANDLER: Yeah. [Joey walks out and after a few seconds comes back in and gives Chandler a big hug. He then leaves for good and Chandler is left alone in his apartment.] CLOSING CREDITS
Joey: What's it sound like? It's a guy with my identical hands! It was incredible! Chandler, the dealer's hands were exactly like me! It-it was like looking at my hands in a mirror!
(Ross looks at her, then leaves slamming the door behind him.)
(Hits the ball towards Chandler who returns it back to him. He then hits the ball at Monica who slams it and it bounces off Kara's leg.)
(They start singing, and Phoebe covers her mouth at the American part.)