words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel are sitting around the kitchen table as Ross enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Phoebe are counting the invitations as Chandler exits from the bathroom.]
Monica: Well what are you gonna do when he finds out he wasnt even asked?!
Rachel: What are you doing?! Get in the front!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Phoebe are on the couch as a man enters.]
Chandler: Are you serious?! I mean like eloping?! No more stupid wedding stuff?! No more these flowers or these flowers or these flowersThink of the money well save!! (Monica just looks at him.) Were not eloping. I love the flowers. Can our wedding be bigger please?
Chandler: No-no all kids are embarrassed by their parents, youd have to come up with a whole new word for what I went through. When I was in High School, he used to come to all of my swim meets dressed as a different Hollywood starlet. Yknow its hard enough to be fourteen. Youre skinny. Youre wearing speedoesThat your mom promised that you would grow into! And you look up into the stands and theres your dad cheering you on dressed as Carmen Miranda. We was wearing a headdress with real fruit that he will later hand out to your friends as a healthy snack!
Joey: Yeah well next thing you know, hell be telling you that your high heels are good for his posture!
Ross: (grabbing the wheel) What-what are you doing?! Are youOkay thats not funny! Just stop horsing around!
Ross: Okay, stay calm. Nothing is going to happen to you, you are not in that much trouble.
[Scene: Las Vegas, we have the typical glamour shots of Vegas and the strip before we arrive at 4 Queens bar, where Chandler and Monica are sitting at a table waiting for the show to start.
[Scene: The Porsche, they have pulled over and are awaiting the cop to come talk to them.]
Helena: (standing at a table and asking the guy sitting there) Where are you from?
Helena: Monica! Where are you from?
Chandler: Actually Monica and I are engaged.
Helena: Before we go on with the show, I just want to say to the bride and groom how lucky they are to have found each other. In every life, a little rain must fall. Fortunately, in my life (Four guys wearing rubber boots, shorts, hats, and nothing else carrying umbrellas run onto the stage.) (Singing) Its raining men!
[Scene: The Porsche, cars are whizzing by and honking their horns on both sides very quickly as Ross creeps along.]
Ross: I mean youre not gonna give me a-a ticket for driving too slow are ya?
Joey: Oh, let me get this. (He takes out his wallet, but the panties come with it. The woman and waitress are shocked.) (Realizing) (To the woman) These are for you.
Ross: We are four short of a bush-o (pause). God I feel so alive, I love being in the country!
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Rachel are sitting on the sofa]
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are sitting on the couch. Ross is sitting on the armchair.]
Phoebe: What are people having, the garlic Martini?
Monica: You know what? I take back what I said before. You keep playing at the restaurant, because with your music driving people inside, my bar sales are going up like crazy.
Phoebe: Well at least all my songs don't taste like garlic. Yeah, there are other ingredients Monica.
Joey: Well, I'm feeling really insecure about the one we are shooting tomorrow...
Joey: (looks at her for a moment) What the hell are you talking about??
Joey: (enters the room) Hey, you guys, what are you doing tomorrow night?
Joey: You guys are gonna have a great time, I promise!
Monica: Who? Who do you know that are friends that just fool around?
Monica: What the hell are you cooking!
Monica: Who, who are they?
Rachel: (angry) You are having a party tonight??
[Scene: Ross, Charlie and Professor Spafford are sitting at the table in a restaurant]
Monica: Ok, then, why are you... (she opens her robe revealing a nice black dress) all dressed up??
Phoebe: Monica, you might want to remember that you are married. Where is Chandler anyway? (Looks around)
Joey: (pulls out a fork) All right, what are we havin? (Starts digging in.)
Joey: Oh my God! I didn�t feel a thing ! Hey, are you still looking for a job because you can tweeze circles aroundthat sadistic bitch at the saloon
Ross: Of course you would, your brains are smaller than mine!! (Rachel nods) Man, I can't compete with the guys she goes out with, they are so out of my league! oh my God!
Ross: (covering with his hand Chandler's face, like pretending he's not there) (to Monica) There're these two professors who are joining my department and I have to meet them here and show them around campus.
Dirk: Hey! So what show are you on?
Bitter lady: Well, I bet you are all thinkin' "Now would be a really great time for an intermission", huh?
Joey: Ah, let me see! (she hands him a pile of tissues) Damn, that's a lot of guys! Are you a little slutty?
Joey: Ross, you should know that my pants are startin to come down and Im not wearing any underwear!
Ross: Uhm no! Think less of you! No, I don't think less of you. I mean, you saw someone you liked and you kissed them. I mean, those people who like someone and don't kiss them... those-those people are stupid, I hate those people.
Joey: Come on in, how are ya?
Phoebe: (watching around and whispering) Ok, are they listening?
Phoebe: Hey Ross! So listen, about you and the dinosaur girl, are you really just gonna let a couple of Nobel prizes scare you off? What is that, come on, a piece of paper?
Ross: (looking down) Are you wearing two belts?
Chandler: I have a weird feeling about this place. (pause) How do I know that they are not gonna secretly videotape me and put it all over the internet.
Chandler: Why are you here?
Monica: Hey, honey, my test is down the hall, are you sure you're going to be ok?
Rachel: (to the cowgirl) And you are so in style right now. Yknow, I work at Ralph Lauren and the whole fall line has got this like equestrian theme going on. I dont suppose you saw the cover of British Vogue, but
Rachel: (Sees Phoebe's slippers through the hole) Wow... I really love your... (startled as she realizes those are Phoebe's slippers)
Janice: Oh, Chandler, look. You and Monica are meant to have children. I am sure it's gonna be just fine.
Joey: Okay. Rachel and Phoebe are already there, okay? So they probably started without us. We could just slip in and no-one needs to know where we were! (he raises his hands and on his right one there's a Rangers foam finger)
Phoebe: You know what? You are right. I am gonna quit. It's time I took my life back!
Ross: (shaking head) Oh Joey, Joey! But still, I mean, it seems like you guys are having a great time together.
Janice: Well, Sid and I are trying again and we had trouble last time because apparently we...
Phoebe: (through the door, with a Scottish accent) Are you ready for your Scottish massage? Put your face in the hole, lassy.
[Scene: Central Perk. Charlie, Joey and Rachel are on the couches]
Chandler: No-no-no! It is going to be okay, because Mrs. Braverman is gonna send away for a free one and that way we all win! The only losers are the big cheesecake conglomerate, (Reading the label) Mommas Little Bakery. (Pause) I feel terrible, Im a horrible, horrible, horrible person.
JOEY: What are you . ..� (He sees her in her negligee.)� Why are you dressed like that?
Ross: Yeah, right! What was last time he met a submission deadline for an abstract (he and Charlie laugh, then Joey starts laughing too without any reason) Well, why are you laughing?
Rachel: Oh... you're not gonna do a magic trick, are ya?
Chandler: I think I can safely say that we all have family issues, work stuff and/or are sick.
Monica: There are no tickets on the nightstand!
Charlie: Yeah! Actually Joey and I are going to the movies tonight, wanna come?
Monica: You are both idiots. The joke is not funny, and its offensive to women, and doctors, and monkeys! You shouldnt be arguing over who gets credit, you should be arguing over who gets blamed for inflicting this horrible joke upon the world! Now let it go! The joke sucks!
Phoebe: (comes out too) Well, some things are just hard to say to your face.
[Scene: Shop, Phoebe and Rachel are talking in front of the dressing room]
Rachel: Oh! What are we gonna do?
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartement. Chandler and the guest are in the living room, Monica in the kitchen]
Ross: The data we are receiving from MRI scans and DNA testing of these fossils are - are staggering.
Chandler: (very seriously) That's really not the kind of thing we are looking for Zack.
Phoebe: What are the chances? 1 billion Chinese people and they send Mike!?
Rachel: Ok. (Phoebe starts to walk in the opposite direction though. Rachel sees and follows her) Wha...? where? Where are you going?
Charlie: You know, by the way. I heard you tell her not to do anything. Thanks for sticking up for me. You are such a nice person.
Phoebe: Are you sure? Because I'm really dreading going to this party.
Phoebe: Yeah. What-what are you doing here?
Phoebe: Well, it's great that you're back! How are you?
Chandler: Really? Are you sure?
Chandler: We are gonna be great parents.
Jeanette: (to Zack) Here are the boards for Friday's pitch (hands him something).
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next day, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are baby-sitting the triplets. They each have one baby.]
Ross: Oh, that's right! (to Emma) Daddy and uncle Joey are going on a trip today. We're going to a conference in Barbados, right?
Joey: I know, there are gonna be some pasty folks by the pool tomorrow! (A woman goes towards them)
Chandler: Are you just tired now or are you always tired, 'cause that could be a sign of clinical depression.
Sarah: (to Joey) Are you a paleontologist?
Monica: I mean, my feelings for Richard are certainly gone.
Phoebe: You just did it again. Chandler, your feelings for Chandler are certainly gone!
Nurse: Mr. Bing? (Chandler jumps up) Here you are! You'll go into that room and deposit your specimen into the container.
Monica: Ok, I'm sensing that this is some kind of word play, because you are pink with barely controlled glee.
Monica: Chandler, we have talked about this. You are not supposed to give people advice! Now couldn't you just have made some sort of inappropriate joke?
Joey: Oh! Hey! Thank God you guys are here!
Monica: What are you serious? You wanna marry him? Wha... What about Mike?
Charlie: Oh wait, Joey and I are supposed to have dinner (Looks at Joey).
Waiter: I'm sorry sir, these are for the pharmaceutical convention (walks away)
[Scene: The hall, full of paleontologists. Rachel and Joey are walking around]
David: Are... are you kidding? You know, when you don't see someone for a long time, a-a-and you kind of build them up in your head and you start thinking about: Come on, don't be crazy. Nobody is that beautiful, but... well, you are. (Phoebe seems very charmed) Well, so, uhm... are you seeing... anyone? (Phoebe is still up on a cloud from what David just said)
Chandler: So great things are happening at work and in your personal life!
[Scene: the Pharmacist convention. Joey and Rachel are walking out of it, drinking cocktails]
Phoebe: What are you, what are you doing here?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's room. Monica and Chandler are in bed.]
Ross: (from across the wall) Walls are pretty thin, guys!
Monica: So, what are we gonna do today?
Phoebe: Well, on the bright side, now you won't have to see all these paleontologists with their shirts off. (Grabs a drink and notices that the two men are upset) Not you guys. You got it going on!
Charlie: (walking in) Hey! There you are!
Monica: (angry) Ow, what are the chances!
Joey: I mean, she should be with someone like... Ross! You know what I mean, he uses all those big words too! Man, smart people are dull!
Rachel: W-What are you, what are you talking about?
Joey: Well, who knew? Pharmacists are fun.
Joey: (desperate) What the hell are you doin'???
Phoebe: (looking at Mike) Oh, yeah! (turning to Chandler) Are you telling me you... you're not even... a little turned on by Monica, right now?
[Scene: the hotel game room. Monica and Mike are still playing ping pong]
Charlie: Are they still looking for us?
Rachel: Ooh! You guys are so lucky you are here with people, you known it's such a romantic place. That's all, I just wish I could (looks at Joey who is at the check in desk) share that with a guy.
Ross: Oh, (door is locked) holy molly are we in a pickle now.
(they all put their ear against the wall to be able to hear what's being said. We move to Ross's room where he and Charlie are kissing.)