words in movies
[Scene: The Wedding Chapel, continued from last season. Chandler and Monica are about to get married.]
Monica: Are you sure you wanna do this?
(Chandler and Monica are stunned again.)
Monica: What are you guys doing here?
Joey: Ross and Rachel left us a message saying they were getting married! Isnt that why you guys are here?
Monica: What are you talking about? If you get married in Vegas youre married everywhere.
{Transcibers note: In case you havent heard, Courteney Cox got married to David Arquette during hiatus and changed her name to Courteney Cox Arquette. But David was a busy boy during the off season for not only did he marry but everyone else as well. For theyre all listed as Jennifer Aniston Arquette, Lisa Kudrow Arquette, in an interesting twist Matt LeBlanc Arquette, Matthew Perry Arquette, David Schwimmer Arquette, and even the creators of the show are now David Crane Arquette and Marta Kauffman Arquette. I just wonder what the new sleeping arrangements are }
Ross: Why are we in bed together?
Phoebe: Are you asking me to have a frenaissance?
Chandler: Look, I just dont think Monica and I are ready to get married yet! Yknow? I mean, I love her and everything but seeing Ross and Rachel coming out of that chapel was like a, like a wake-up call that Monica and I are moving so fast. Yknow? And, how do I tell her without crushing her?
Chandler: Are we gonna talk about what you guys did last night? Or
Joey: They let you get married when youre drunk! Most people who get married in Vegas are drunk!
Monica: What are you guys gonna do?
[Scene: The casino floor, Chandler and Monica are walking through it.]
Chandler: So where are we on the whole going back to the place where they have all the marriages thing? I love you.
Monica: Ohh, of course we are! (They walk up to the elevators.) We left it up to fate. (Pushes the elevator button.) If we were supposed to get married there would be a clear-cut sign. (The elevator door opens to a priest reading from a bible with Chandler and Monica standing side-by-side holding each others hands.)
[Scene: Phoebes cab, Phoebe and Joey are driving back. Phoebe is driving while Joey is sleeping.]
Phoebe: Well, you promised me a fun road trip! Weve been on the road six hours and youve been asleep for five and a half! We are switching at the next rest stop and you are going to drive all the way back! That will be your punishment, you greedy sleeper!
Phoebe: Yeah! And until then you are going to sing to me because the radios broken and you are selfish but have a nice voice.
Joey: (to himself) Man, this is a long drive! Are my eyes open? No! (He opens his eyes and sees a hitchhiker.)
Rachel: You are asking me to be your wife!
Phoebe: Yknow what? Im not talking to you! You go back to sleep! (To the hitchhiker) And you, are you a rapist?!
Joey: That is incredible! You are the master!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica are there and Rachel is arranging a bouquet of flowers, pricks her finger on a thorn, throws the bouquet over her head, and those you who are quicker than some already know that Monica is the one who catches it.]
Chandler: All right, should we just, should we just get married? Yknow? I mean should we just do it? All the signs are telling us to do it.
Monica: Im sick of the signs! Its too fast, Im happy the way things are!
Chandler: Are you hugging the door right now.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Phoebe are on the couch as Ross enters.]
Joey: What are you doing?
Emily: Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear this but (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) Im gonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends and its all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.
Monica: (laughs) Yes, I did! And you are welcome!
Chandler: Y'know what, we should all calm down because your brothers not going to punch me. (to Joey) Are ya?
Phoebe: No no no, Ill be nice, I swear!!! Could you just give me the number for where they are?
[Scene: Rehearsal dinner hall. Ross and Emily are standing in the reception area. Monica arrives with her parents.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey are standing by the kitchen entrance. A waiter comes out.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Joey are standing at the counter. Monica is flipping a light switch on and off next to the door.]
[Scene: The Rehearsal Dinner Hall. Chandler, Joey, Ross, Emily, Monica, and all the bridal party are seated at the table. Chandler gets up to make a toast.]
Phoebe: (Trying to get up.) Wait!! Where are you going?! What are you doing?! No!! Wait!! (Not able to get up.) God!! Why am I always pregnant when she does that?!
Felicity: (Putting her arm around Joey.) Are you going home? I was hoping to get to know you better.
Chandler: So how are you doing?
Gym Employee: (to Ross) So, are you a member of any gym.
The Stripper: Okay, who are you? The Hardy boys? Look, I dont need to steal some stupid ring, all right? I make $1,600 a week doing what I do; any of you guys make that?
(They kiss but are interrupted by a knock on the door.)
Chandler: Yeah you are!!
Chandler: So, ahh, how are ya? How ya...How ya... You okay?
Passenger: (Frustrated he takes his headphones off.) Oh, oh oh!! Im sorry, can I interrupt? You know I just want to say..That you are a horrible, horrible person.
Fat Monica: I think his begging days are over now that he's going out with Nancy Branson.
Phoebe: Oh God, Im so glad you guys are happy, I was so afraid you were going to be all freaked.
Kathy: Oh. Well uh, (to Chandler) you not being able to talk may make this easier. Listen umm (She looks at the gang who are watching, they take the hint and leave them alone.) Listen I dont wanna be someone who comes between two best friends. I just, I cant stand seeing what this is doing to you guys, and I dont wanna be the cause of that. So, I dont think we can see each other anymore. Im gonna go to my moms in Chicago, Im gonna stay there for awhile. I think this couldve be something really amazing, but yknow this is probably for the best. Yknow? Im gonna miss you. Good-bye, Chandler.
Ross: My God. Rachel! (He walks towards her, grasps her hands and kisses her on the cheek.) Your here. I cant believe it. (She giggles.) What happen? Why are you here?
Mr. Geller: Oh yeah, well who serves steak when theres no place to sit, I mean how are you supposed to eat this?
Monica: Joey, what are you doing? You promised Phoebe you wouldnt eat meat until she has the babies!
Monica: But my clothes areohh! (They both leave.)
(They both start to frantically rip each others clothes off, but are interrupted when Joey tries to open the door.)
(They both run to rip the covers off the bed, but are interrupted by Ross.)
[Scene: Ross and Emilys room, the next morning. Ross is now asleep and has his head in Monicas lap and his feet on Chandlers lap. Monica and Chandler are both still awake and depressed.]
Mrs. Waltham: Oh yes, there you are.
[Scene: The church where Ross and Emily are to be married. Judy, Andrea, and Monica enter together.]
Phoebe: Ohh thats so sweet! (Her cell phone rings.) Oh! Hang on! (Quickly grabs a cigarette and starts to light it as her phone rings.) Hang onnnnnn!!! (Gets the cigarette lighted and answers the phone.) (On phone.) Go!! No! No-no! I said sell when it hits 50! 5-0, its a number! It comes after 4-9!! No, its okay. Its okay, youre allowed one mistake. Just kidding, you are of course fired.
Monica: Well, we certainly are alone.
ROSS: [Rachel, laughing, puts a hand on the guy's shoulder] Look at that, look at that, see how she's pushing him away and he won't budge. Alright, I'm gonna do something. [walks up in the middle of their conversation] Excuse me, are you Rachel?
Ross: Hi! What are you, what are you doing here?
Rachel: So umm, what time are you supposed to leave?
Joey: Man, you are Westminster Crabby. (He starts chasing Chandler towards the Abbey.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are eating breakfast.]
[The next flashback is from The One Where Eddie Moves In. It's the sequence where Joey and Chandler are both saddened that they're not living together anymore. All By Myself is playing in the background.]
(They move into kiss but are interrupted by Joey knocking on the door.)
Rachel: That's fine. So Monica, you are now in control of my love life.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's Bathroom, Chandler and Monica are sharing a candlelight bubble bath while drinking champagne and they clink their glasses.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Chandler and Joey are there looking at pictures from the trip to London.]
Monica: If you would stop thinking about Ross for one minute you would notice that there are great guys everywhere! I mean, look! Look, Gunther! (Gunther turns to listen in.) I mean, he's nice, he's cute.
Phoebe: (Grabs the pictures) Oh! Here we all are! Yeah, there's Ross and Joey and you and me. (She picks up a magic marker and draws herself in. Monica can't watch.)
[Scene: Later that evening at the rehearsal dinner. Chandler and Monica are sitting on a sofa. Chandler is covering his face in embarrassment because of the toast.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters.]
[Cut to the kitchen, Ross and Chandler are doing the dishes.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Monica, Chandler, and Joey are there as Ross enters with Phoebe.]
Phoebe: That sucks! That's not a trip! I just came from the park! What are we gonna high five about at the stupid Central Park? "Well, it's right by my house, all right!"
[Scene: Ross and Emilys room, Chandler and Monica are still looking for a place to do the deed.]
Ross: Why are you laughing?
Ross: Pheebs, Pheebs, the babies are coming now.
Rachel: High-five, the babies are coming! (They all high-five.)
[Scene: The hallway between the apartments, they are taking Phoebe to the hospital but Chandler and Monica hold back.]
Phoebe: Oh no, none of them are the father. The father is my brother.
Joey: Are they? I didn't know I cared that much.
[Scene: The delivery room, Rachel and Ross are entering.]
[Scene: The waiting room, Monica and Joey are sitting there.]
Chandler: Are you okay? I'm so sorry, he wouldn't leave. He kept asking me about chicken.
Nurse: You are an idiot. (She hands over a blank form).
[Scene: The delivery room, Chandler, Frank, and Ross are with Phoebe.]
Ross: Hey, where are Monica and Rachel anyway?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Monica and Chandler are sitting on one of the chairs doing a crossword puzzle.]
Rachel: What? What are you talking about?! You-you're the one who's been telling me to get over Ross and move on. I'm moving on, and you're moving on with me. Come on, give me one good reason why you don't wanna go.
Chandler: (spotting her) Oh-hey-hey-hey! There you are!
Phoebe: They are. Why?
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Courtney and Matthew are getting ready to do a scene where Monicas sick.]
Rachel: Yes! Yes! Yes, I do! I do know! Frank and Alice are gonna want to keep all of their children!
Big Nosed Rachel: Y'know what? I've just had it with high school boys! They are just silly. (Ross is overhearing this.) Silly, stupid boys! I'm going to start dating men!
[Scene: Joey's room, his doctor, Chandler, and Monica are there.]
[Scene: The delivery room, Rachel and Frank are there.]
Monica: (To Phoebe) How are you doing?
Monica: So, why wait 'til Saturday, are you free tomorrow?
[Scene: The delivery room, later on, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, and Frank are there as Dr. Harad is checking out Phoebe.]
[Cut to Joey's room, his doctor and Ross are there.]
Chandler: So, are you really gonna go out with that nurse man?
Monica: I think you're better than you think you are.
[Scene: A hallway, Monica and Dan are talking.]
Chandler: So uh, now that little Chandler turned out to be a girl, what are they gonna name her?
Monica: Phoebe, we are so proud of you! You're amazing!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Phoebe, Chandler, Ross, and Monica are eating breakfast.]
Dr. Harad: All right, you're getting there. Oh, and y'know, these babies are very, very lucky.
Phoebe: What-what are you talking about?!
Phoebe: Are you calling me selfish?!
(They are standing on either side of Chandler as they discuss the point. Chandler, meanwhile, is disgusted with the whole argument.)
Joey: That's because all people are selfish.
Phoebe: (standing up) Okay, so umm, somebody has to call Frank and Alice. (As she is talking Joey is sticking the camera under her skirt.) And then my mom wants to know-(notices Joey)-Joey, what are you doing?!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
Rachel: So Mon, when are we gonna meet this new secret waiter man?
Rachel: What-what-what are you gonna do?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are there.]
Rachel: Maybe Joey's right. Maybe all good deeds are selfish.
Phoebe: (interrupting) What are you doing?!! Why are you defending him?! Just get me another doctor! One who is not crazy and who is not Fonzie!
Rachel: He got all weird and sputtery and then he said uh, "Yeah, I hear those hemorrhoids are a bitch."
Monica: Oh hey Joey! We've been watching all day, when are you gonna be on TV?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, The girls are talking with the firemen.]
Joey: What? My hands are totally clean, I just gave the duck a bath.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Phoebe are cooking, Chandler is reading a magazine.]
Joey: A hamster? What, those things are like 10 bucks.
Rachel: (entering) Hi! Are you ready? We're gonna be late!
Ross: Now, hold on! Hold on! (Stops him) Look, look, your daughter and I are supposed to leave tonight for our honeymoon, now-now you-you tell her that Im gonna be at that airport and I hope that shell be there too! Oh yeah, I said Rachels name, but it didnt mean anything, Okay? Shes-shes just a friend and thats all! (Rachel sits down, depressed.) Thats all! Now just tell Emily that I love her and that I cant imagine spending my life with anyone else. Please, promise me that youll tell her that.