words in movies
Phoebe: Yeah, I know because you have all the good words. What do I get? I get "its," "and" oh I'm sorry, I have "A." Forget it.
Phoebe: All right, wait just one more second. Hi, it's Phoebe and Rachel's. Please leave a message, thanks!
Rachel: Now wait a minute. You just took all the words!
Ross: So, I just finished this fascinating book. By the year 2030, there'll be computers that can carry out the same amount of functions as an actual human brain. So theoretically you could download your thoughts and memories into this computer and-and-and live forever as a machine.
Monica: (jumps over a box) Honey, that's a great idea nailing the boxes to the floor!
Chandler: Yes, and while I'm doing that, Ross has a great computer story for you.
Joey: I didn't know that! Well, what a pretty last name!
Janine: Australia, I just moved here a couple of weeks ago.
Janine: I'm a dancer.
Joey: You're a dancer? She-she's a dancer!
Monica: Wait a minute...Joey. Joey you can't ask her out, she's your roommate. It-it'll be way too complicated.
Joey: You a little sad about that sweetheart?
Rachel: You guys, I'm telling you, when she runs, she looks like a cross between Kermit The Frog and The Six Million Dollar Man.
Ross: Monica had such a crush on him. Yeah, she used to kiss his poster every night before she went to bed.
Chandler: OK, I'm officially unpacked. Thanks for helping me man. (Turns around and sees that Joey isn't there.) Joe? (Hears giggling coming from a box) Well, I guess Joey went home. Oh and look, there's still one box that I have to unpack. (Hears the giggling again)
[Scene, The Park, Rachel is running and Phoebe is hiding behind a tree.]
Chandler: She is gonna recognize that I did a nice thing and-and, appreciate it.
Ross: Yeah, the phone was facing the other way. (Chandler fixes it and a picture frame off the table.) And that goes back up there.
Joey: (entering) Look, what am I gonna do? I'm not flirting but still, I'm drawing her to me like - like a moth to a flame! (Tries to put his feet on the coffee table...they won't reach and looks around.) What the hell's going on over here?!?!? (Points to Chandler) Monica's gonna kill you! Look I need your help, I have to do something to-to repel this woman! Wait a minute, wait a minute, you guys repel women all the time.
(Chandler gives him a round of mock applause.)
Joey: No-no-no I've seen it happen, you-you get a rapport going with a woman but somehow you manage to kill it. What's your secret?
Rachel: Hey Phoebe, can I talk to you for a second?
Rachel: Well, y'know, the reason I didn't wanna go running with you is because um, well y'know the way that you run is a little...(Starts flapping her arms)
Phoebe: That's okay Rachel. I'm not judging you; that's just who you are. Me. I'm more free y'know? I run like I did when I was a kid, cause that's the only way it's fun. Y'know, I mean didnt you ever run so fast you thought your legs were gonna fall off? Y'know, like when you were like running towards the swings or running away from Satan? (Rachel looks confused) The neighbor's dog.
Ross: Yeah-yeah I uh, I have a uh, a guy problem.
Joey: All right, All right, let's just get this out in the open okay? You're hot. I'm lovable. Clearly there's a vibe going on between us. But, we're roommates and it's a huge mistake for us to continue down this road.
Joey: No, no, no, I'm telling ya. Imagine yourself living in a supermarket and you will understand okay? So the question is, what do we do?
Janine: No! I mean you're a really nice guy and I'm happy to be your roommate and your friend, I'm just y'know, I just don't feel that way about you.
Joey: Oh! I see what happened. It's because I was trying to repel you. Right? Believe me, you'd feel a lot different if I turned it on.
[Scene: The park, Rachel's running by herself and panting. After a little while she decides to run like Phoebe.]
Phoebe: See? And you don't care if people are staring, it's just for a second cause then you're gone!
Rachel: Gone! I mean its amazing Pheebs. I feel so free and so graceful. (Turns and bumps into a mounted policeman and falls) Hey! Look out for the horse! Sorry! (Runs off.)
Monica: Of course not. I mean gosh, Chandler what you did, it's, it's a wonderful thing and I really appreciate it. I know I have this weird thing where I want everything to be in the perfect place, but I'd never expect you to worry about that.
Janine: ...and live forever as a machine!
Joey: And it is a love that is based on having and giving and receiv(Shuts up on Monicas glare.)
Chandler: Then why-why is she going to a play?!
Rachel: Oh, wow! Congratulations, that's quite a waste of time.
Janine: (entering from her room) Monica! Chandler! Im really-really sorry about tonight. I dont know if Joey told you; I just couldnt get out of going to this play. Im sorry. Have a great time.
Chandler: So she was just pretending to have a good time last night? She was lying to our faces?!
Joey: Yeah, shes been in there all day (Points to her room), uh high fever, a nose problem Phlegm! Phlegm! Phlegm-phlegm-phlegm!
Chandler: And I am not blah, I am a hoot!
Joey: Well uh, she didnt want to hang out with you guys two nights in a row. Im so sorry.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are watching a movie.]
Joey: Look, come on you guys, you said you were gonna try! All right look, I came over here to invite you guys to a movie with me and Janine.
Ross: Wow! I didnt know that there was a Pottery Barn up here.
Rachel: I know, I know. I went a little crazy.
Woman No. 1: No. No, haven't seen a monkey. Do you know anything about fixing radiators?
Ross: Hmm, a lot of this stuff is from Colonial times. Hey, what are some other time periods Rachel? (She glares at him.)
Phoebe: (gasps) Another amazing find! Wow! Oh I bet this has a great story too!
Janine: Well yknow, hes blah, shes justshes very loud for such a small person.
Rachel: Oh it does, it does! It is a room separating apparatus from Colonial times.
Frank: YESSSSS!!!!! We got a baby boy!!
(They walk by a Pottery Barn window display.)
Phoebe: Yeah no, Im telling you Rachel has such a great eye for this stuff. Ross, yknow if you ever decide you need to redecorateAnd I think that you should. You should, you should ask Rachel to help.
Rachel: It was like months ago. We were walking by this antique store, and I saw this pin in the window, and I told him that it was just like one my grandmother had when I was a little girl. Oh! I can't believe he remembered!
Janine: Well I did. I really did. And you guys, Ive got to say, Im sorry if I was a little weird after the last time we went out. I guess I was just nervous or something.
Phoebe: Okay then I dont have a choice! I have to buy that lamp!
Joey: All right, uh, weve got a little bit of a problem here. These people are my friends; you cant treat them that way.
Monica: Fine! Judge all you want to but, (points to Ross) married a lesbian, (points to Rachel) left a man at the altar, (points to Phoebe) fell in love with a gay ice dancer, (points to Joey) threw a girls wooden leg in a fire, (points to Chandler) livin in a box!! (goes to her room)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Phoebe, Rachel and Monica are there. Ross walks in with a magazine in his hand.]
[Scene: Las Vegas, we have the typical glamour shots of Vegas, the Strip, slot machines, a couple other gaming tables all set to the tune of you guessed it, Money. Anyhoo, we finally get through that and watch Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe enter Caesar's Palace carrying their luggage.]
Rachel: I-I dont want your job. I-I dont. Ohh this is such a mistake. I did not make out with him. Nobody made out with him. I did not use my keycard yesterday. I dont even know how to use my keycard. (The elevator stops. Ralph steps on.)
Chandler: Dude, you have got to turn on Behind the Music. The band Heart is having a really tough time, and I think they may break up.
Joey: No, Chandler. Look, forget about it, okay? Look, I know things have been a little tight since Janine moved out. Oh, was she hot.
Rachel: Ohh, wait a minute, we havent pre
Mr. Treeger:: Im sure as hell a dancer, its no use Marge will never go for me.
Chandler: So explain something to me here, uh, what kind of a relationship do you imagine us having if you already have a husband and a boyfriend?
Rachel: We are looking at a Playboy.
Monica: So do you think that these picturesAre, are they trying to tell a story?
Monica: Okay, Ive got a question. If you had to pick one of us to date, who would it be?
Ross: What, you didnt get it? The doctor is a monkey.
Ross: Well, I was going to stick it in the ATM, but now I think Ill show the sexy teller that I am a published writer.
Joey: Uh, I dont know. Ya see, its just, see I was a regular on a soap opera yknow? And to go from that to this, I just Plus, Id have to wait on all my friends.
Joey: Maybe I could be a waiter. Could I use the phone?
Monica: Do you know whats a bad idea?
Monica: Thats a good idea.
(They go out to investigate, and find Joey wrapped in a blanket watching their television.)
Monica: Thats right. (A noise comes from the living room.) Did you hear something?
Monica: (laughing) Oh, dont you guys look cute. You guys make such a cute couple.
Phoebe: Fine. The reason that I was leaning a little bit more toward Rachel than you is just that youre just kinda high maintenanceOkay lets go to lunch!
Phoebe: Oh, okay, (laughing) youre not a pushover.
Monica: That is completely untrue. You think Im high maintenance? Okay, prove it. I want you to make a list and were going to go through it point by point!
Rachel: What? Wait a minute. What are you saying, that Im a pushover? Im not a pushover.
Joey: (to a table of strangers) You guys need anything, cause Im heading up there.
Joey: Nah, its okay. Right, Gunther? (Winks at him as if theyre in on a secret together.)
Chandler: A pharmacist. (Rachel mocks him.)
Ross: Uh, yeah, Ill take a coffee. Thanks, man.
Chandler: So is your apron. Youre wearing it like a cape.
Joey: Its kind of embarrassing, yknow. I mean, I was an actor and now Im a waiter. Its supposed to go in the other direction.
Rachel: Phoebe. We would like to talk to you for a second.
Joey: Oh, Im sorry, Ross. Ill get it for you right now. And since I made you wait, Ill toss in a free muffin.
Monica: So, maybe I am a little high maintenance. And maybe Rachel is a little bit of a pushover. But you know what we decided you are?
Rachel: Yeah, and I am okay with being a pushover.
Rachel: I am not a pushover!
Chandler: Okay, its just weird! Okay? I dont want to be standing their saying my vows and then having the mental image of you and Monica! I-I-I need I dont know what I need. I need a walk.
Rachel: He got it a flea market!
Joey: Yeah, its for the kids. To keep the kids off drugs. Its a very important issue in this months Playboy. Im sure you all read about it.
Chandler: (to Ross) Dont try to sway her. (To Monica) (Softly) Im your only chance to have a baby. Okay, lets go.
Chandler: I think its great that you work here. Youre going to make a lot of money, and heres your first tip: Dont eat yellow snow. (He laughs, then picks up a pen, glares at Ross, and writes in his journal). Ah ha ha, 2:15, coffeehouse.
Monica: Wait Chandler come on, letsits not a big deal!
Chandler: (pauses as he struggles with what he has to say) Youre a little high maintenance.
Phoebe: Wow! That is a bad audition.
Ross: Um, that is because my doctor says that I have a very serious.... nuget.... diffency.
Rachel: Yeah, pretty nice, huh? Now whos a pushover?
(A good-looking woman approaches.)
Rachel: Wait a minute, youre only giving free stuff away to the pretty girls?
Woman: Oh great! Well, tell him thanks. And since uh, Joey seems like such a nice guy, maybe we could go on a date sometime?
Monica: Oh God, stop with the plan! So what, so what you saw him with a girl? Who cares?! That doesn't mean anything! Now look, you're going to go out on a date with Danny and you're going to be so charming he's gonna forget all about that stupid subway girl.
Joey: How about a scone on the house baby?
Monica: I dont need a tissue! Im fine-d!
Ross: When you put a D at the end of Fine youre not fine.
(A woman enters.)
(Theres a knock on the door. The gang is stunned and Phoebe counts to make sure that everyone is there. Out of curiosity Chandler goes and answers the door.)
Ross: Its also a sign of friendship.
Ben: That you and daddy were not on a break.
(Theres a knock on the door and Ross enters.)
Jill: Yeah but it wasnt for me, it was for a friend.
Monica: You bought a boat?
Jill: Okay, I bought a boat.
Jill: (entering, carrying a bunch of shopping bags) I just had the hardest day. Those bags are so heavy. (Sets them down.)
Joey: (to a woman who came in third in a modeling contest) Sorry! (He grabs her muffin away and returns it to the serving tray.)
Joey: (to a customer) Are you all finished here?
Jill: Oh please, I memorized those numbers when I was 15. But look at all the cool make-it-on-my-own stuff I got! (Holds up a red sweater) This is my "Please, hire me" sweater. (Holds up a pair of black pants) And these are my, "Dont you want to rent me this apartment?" pants.
Ross: A little? Your place looks like page 72 of the catalogue. Oh look at that! The ornamental bird cage! Large!
Phoebe: Seriously, I dont Rachels gonna think its a good idea.
Phoebe: Oh well, all right, I got (Ross hands her a bag) (To Ross) thank you, I got uh, this yknow "I want a job sweater." (Holds up the same sweater.)
Monica: Hey Rach, what about this? (She holds up a chrome 5-point star.) Huh? Who-who gets this? See, I dont know if I want it because it might be yknow, too many memories!
Rachel: Oh come(Stutters)Of course I know that. I mean of course you never leave a baby alone! I mean who wouldshe wouldnt be safe as she would be with me, the baby dummy. Oh God, okay. Yknow what? I think opening the presents right now is a little overwhelming right now. So I think umm, Im just gonna maybe open them a little bit later, but thank you all for coming. And for these beautiful gifts, and this basket is beautiful.
[Scene: Rachels old room. Its pretty much empty except for a few boxes against the walls. Ross and Chandler enter.]
Chandler: Y'know, how did I get this reputation as a dropper? Okay? I'm anything but a dropper. (We see various scenes of him dropping a football, a mug of coffee, the phone, an apple, a Frisbee, a record, and the final scene has a ball bouncing off of his chest. I'm not going to describe them, you'll have to see them.)
Ross: Ross, wants a pajmena?
Jill: Oh my gosh, that was so lame. Like a pajmena could be a rug!
Ross: Its a rug. (Jill winces.)
Monica: (wiping her nose) Are you saying that you dont wanna get with this? (Tries to do a little sexy body rub, but it doesnt work all that well with the big robe.)